Radical Honesty in Relationships ( Disclaimer Alert!!)

[Pandora]

If you get turned off by "woo woo" New Age, hippy dippy posts please stop reading now. I just took about 200 mg of MDMA. Previously I had just taken Shrooms and fell in love with them. I use them at least once a year. As you know I have been communicating and "dating" a girl overseas. She called while I was rolling and we had the most radically honest conversation ever.

Conversations on psychedelics are largely devoid of ego defenses. You tend to come from a place of love and understanding because your brain is being flooded with Serotonin. This allows a level of vulnerability unparalleled in normal life. These things are truly sacred.

It makes me wonder how many relationships and marriages could be saved by using therapeutic levels of MDMA or psylocibin. Even if you do not want to take substances you could just practice Radical Honesty.

I had so many insights during this conversation with her.

1.) Everyone is really looking for love and acceptance. Some men use womanizing ( myself) to fill that love void. Many women ( sluts) use raw sexual pleasure as a way to get it. Extreme promiscuity is really just looking for love in the wrong places. Physical pleasure is sub par replacement for love. Some use materialism ( gold diggers) as a substitute for love.

2.) Cheating is a way to avoid real intimacy with one person. This avoidance of intimacy is so you will not get hurt. Cheating is a form of spinning plates in order to protect oneself. Now I will agree that men are not naturally monogamous but they should be polygamous in the form of having multiple wives. They should not be polygamous in the form of having multiple random sexual partners.

3.) If a girls father forgets her birthday then she will become a hoe, if a girls father neglects her in ANY way, then she will be a hoe. She is not being a hoe just because she likes dyck. She is doing it searching for her fathers love.

4.) Alot of men have unhealed relationships with the feminine. I know I do. We might have had weak or overbearing mothers. We might have been scared by our first love interest etc....

5.) What we see in the current dating market is traumatized people chasing after love from other traumatized people.

6.) A lot of stuff emotional females say in the moment they really don't mean. This is difficult to accept because men need to be talked to kindly and respected. We take it personally but they can't help it sometimes.

Okay sorry for the weirdo post. I hope this will spark an introspective conversation about this. Thanks

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

I love psilocybin but don't lump it in with MDMA...MDMA is not a psychedelic, it's an empathogen, it bombards you with dopamine and norepinephrine as well, in all honestly is more of stimulant than anything and while I've never done it, it seems to basically trigger hypomanic-like behavior more than anything.

Seems like such a waste of an incredibly powerful and potentially neurotoxic drug to chat with some girl no offense... though I do agree that MDMA or psychedelics could be helpful for a relationship but I disgress...

2. Male/female cheating are quite simply not the same thing. I think men can be innately wired to have multiple female partners they support (ie multiple wives/families) or at the very least most of them can have multiple "sex only" partners outside the relationship. Though, some men can't handle it, generally the it's ones who have few opportunities since they operate in scarcity. Women are not wired for this and cheating in the form of kissing a coworker, "male friends" who they emotionally cheat with, or long term romanic affairs are all heinous and disgusting acts. If a man just cheats with a women once it's nowhere near as harmful as a women doing it (generally).

4. Yes, male "mommy issues" are the equivalent of female Daddy issues in many ways.

5. Traumatized men go after BPD/NPD women because of trauma typically, and women go for the dark triad Chads for similar reasons, so I agree.

6. Men worth their salt learn how to communicate with women (make sure they feel heard and appreciated/understood) - is it so hard for women to communicate like men (directly) too ?

 

[Pandora]

I love psilocybin but don't lump it in with MDMA...MDMA is not a psychedelic, it's an empathogen, it bombards you with dopamine and norepinephrine as well, in all honestly is more of stimulant than anything and while I've never done it, it seems to basically trigger hypomanic-like behavior more than anything.

Seems like such a waste of an incredibly powerful and potentially neurotoxic drug to chat with some girl no offense... though I do agree that MDMA or psychedelics could be helpful for a relationship but I disgress...

2. Male/female cheating are quite simply not the same thing. I think men can be innately wired to have multiple female partners they support (ie multiple wives/families) or at the very least most of them can have multiple "sex only" partners outside the relationship. Though, some men can't handle it, generally the it's ones who have few opportunities since they operate in scarcity. Women are not wired for this and cheating in the form of kissing a coworker, "male friends" who they emotionally cheat with, or long term romanic affairs are all heinous and disgusting acts. If a man just cheats with a women once it's nowhere near as harmful as a women doing it (generally).

4. Yes, male "mommy issues" are the equivalent of female Daddy issues in many ways.

5. Traumatized men go after BPD/NPD women because of trauma typically, and women go for the dark triad Chads for similar reasons, so I agree.

6. Men worth their salt learn how to communicate with women (make sure they feel heard and appreciated/understood) - is it so hard for women to communicate like men (directly) too ?

Hey I am glad you made that distinction. I knew it was not a psychedelic but I did not think anyone knew enough about them to call me out on my misclassification. So I just did not correct it my mistake. You are right it is an empathogen but the root word of empathogen is empathy.

MDMA helps you feel a lot of empathy for the other person. MDMA is so powerful for trauma healing that they are using it in therapy for people with PTSD. Take it first before you judge it. It is similar to psylocibin even though it is technically classified as different. All these compounds stimulate Serotonin pathways anyway.

Addressing your points:

2.) I think I am agreeing with you. I am saying that instead of cheating with the other woman that men should marry the other woman. If we are just using the other woman for sexual gratification then it is "morally" wrong. Yes I 100% agree that women are not wired for cheating. A woman that cheats is cheating to avoid true intimacy/ vulnerability.

6.) Here is where empathy comes in. Yes it is very difficult for a woman to communicate like a man. Women ask a similar question
" is it so hard for men to have the sexual control that women do, why do they feel the need to fyck everything". See the trouble we have controlling our lust is the same trouble they have controlling their emotions. Different battles but same intensity.

 

[Epimanes]

Mdma used go be used in a marriage counseling environment.... til it got turned to schedule one by Ronald Regan during the "war on drugs"

That said ... MDMA prolonged the death of my marriage... a few years... but it ultimately still died. I found a few times while on it she was definitely way more open.... would tell me she's not sure why when she's "sober" she seems to hate me so much... we would fuk like mad... and then the next day I'd be invisible to her... and she would go back to her moody self centered self...

If ya know my story... well...then ya know the rest.

Edit to add: I no longer trust MDMA now... so much of it is laced with fentynol... its not worth the risk anymore.. back then I bought a huge batch of it from the same batch... and when I ran out... I nvr got it again. It's my fav tho ... if I was to go back to that kind of behavior... I likely won't... weed... and shrooms (microdose) is where it's at now... I can buy both in the dispensary


Epi

 

[Pandora]

Mdma used go be used in a marriage counseling environment.... til it got turned to schedule one by Ronald Regan during the "war on drugs"

That said ... MDMA prolonged the death of my marriage... a few years... but it ultimately still died. I found a few times while on it she was definitely way more open.... would tell me she's not sure why when she's "sober" she seems to hate me so much... we would fuk like mad... and then the next day I'd be invisible to her... and she would go back to her moody self centered self...

If ya know my story... well...then ya know the rest.

Edit to add: I no longer trust MDMA now... so much of it is laced with fentynol... its not worth the risk anymore.. back then I bought a huge batch of it from the same batch... and when I ran out... I nvr got it again. It's my fav tho ... if I was to go back to that kind of behavior... I likely won't... weed... and shrooms (microdose) is where it's at now... I can buy both in the dispensary


Epi

Hey man your story sounds interesting. Do you have a link to your marriage story that I can read?

Also wow even MDMA could not save the marriage. I take it you are probably somewhat a "spiritual" woo woo type of guy. Was your ex wife just not able to process her trauma etc. She could never figure out why she hated you? Im sure it had to do with self esteem and daddy issues. Im asking because I dont want that to happen to me if I marry this chick.

Yes I also share the same view of MDMA. Its too risky to buy these days because of the Fentanyl risk. You can get a simailar experience with the right strain of Shrooms.

 

[Gamisch]

I get what it is you're trying to say.

All the M does is it unlocks something within yourself that you can't reach sober for whatever reason. But it's there nevertheless.
I know how liberating it is to be honest though. Instead of walking on eggshells all the time, fearing that the other party will feel some type of way when you spit your truths. But that's the thing: its YOUR truth. If someone can't live with it, they gotta go( power of walking away).

If you need substance X to get you over a certain edge, that's fine. The trick is to capture the feeling and apply it when sober. Same with alcohol. If you can go out and even ACT like you're on alcohol ,you'll get the same results..but it's extremely difficult to do naturally.

So never forget, most drugs just enhance what's been deep inside of us all the time

 

[Epimanes]

Hey man your story sounds interesting. Do you have a link to your marriage story that I can read?

Also wow even MDMA could not save the marriage. I take it you are probably somewhat a "spiritual" woo woo type of guy. Was your ex wife just not able to process her trauma etc. She could never figure out why she hated you? Im sure it had to do with self esteem and daddy issues. Im asking because I dont want that to happen to me if I marry this chick.

Yes I also share the same view of MDMA. Its too risky to buy these days because of the Fentanyl risk. You can get a simailar experience with the right strain of Shrooms.

I have a couple threads... the story is kinda spread out... one thread is called "here I am..wondering wtf" I think
Another is called "to reach out or not"
And then.... "back in the field again"