Question about touching

[ARealCharmer]

Just wanted some opinions...

If you are dating a girl or in a committed relationship, what are the "rules" for engaging in intimacy....

I'm asking because for example, the girls I've been with have been relatively open about touching and sex....In general, women like to be touched and aroused...and intimacy is an important part of a relationship. I'm not saying every second of the day but it can occur often...

For example, when I was in a relationship, we both had the right to touch each other pretty much whenever and nobody had an issue...For example, I grabbed my girlfriend's ass in a restaurant and club.....I've never come across an issue like this....

This I just started dating a new girl recently....She's younger and I guess more inexperienced even thought she had a 7 year relationship but she's still in her early 20's. Anyway, we have been dating a week and have had 4 dates...Already made out a couple times...Then she told me she's not going to kiss me whenever since we are not "boyfriend and girlfriend" and that we are just going out....Which I thought was weird...

Then I was like so well let's be boyfriend and girlfriend...Then we starting kissing and I went for the ass grab and she stopped me...Then she started going off about how it's too early for that even though she didn't have a problem with starting a relationship so quickly....Very weird...She is definitely not ready for sex...She dresses like a 10 cent hooker...I guess she is one of the those girls that likes to tease guys for attention but isn't down for action so quickly...


Anyway, I respected her wishes and she was like she will let me know when she's ready...Honestly, so many girls her age put out so quickly and I've used to having sex pretty quickly within a few dates but this girl is teasing me...I've already spent alot of money on her but I think she is a manipulator...


Anyway, my question is...What are the general rules for touching? Us guys, have to initiate everything...I mean, we are the gas, and they are brakes right? And if a girl is not willing to be intimate and have sex within the first few weeks, does that mean she's not worth the effort?

 

[espanish]

yes you are the gas and she is the brakes. you try to take it as far as you can until she stops you
"is it worth it?" it's a personal preference bro, most people on this forum will tell you if she is giving you a hard time move on, but it's a personal choice really, if you want to stick around for longer, do it. if you feel like she is special and it's rare to find someone like her, stick around, she might eventually give it up.
one thing that's important here is your reaction to her request to slow down. don't try to convince her "no, it's not too soon, blah blah"
validate her request, say "I love taking things slow"

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Just wanted some opinions...

If you are dating a girl or in a committed relationship, what are the "rules" for engaging in intimacy....

I'm asking because for example, the girls I've been with have been relatively open about touching and sex....In general, women like to be touched and aroused...and intimacy is an important part of a relationship. I'm not saying every second of the day but it can occur often...

For example, when I was in a relationship, we both had the right to touch each other pretty much whenever and nobody had an issue...For example, I grabbed my girlfriend's ass in a restaurant and club.....I've never come across an issue like this....

This I just started dating a new girl recently....She's younger and I guess more inexperienced even thought she had a 7 year relationship but she's still in her early 20's. Anyway, we have been dating a week and have had 4 dates...Already made out a couple times...Then she told me she's not going to kiss me whenever since we are not "boyfriend and girlfriend" and that we are just going out....Which I thought was weird...

Then I was like so well let's be boyfriend and girlfriend...Then we starting kissing and I went for the ass grab and she stopped me...Then she started going off about how it's too early for that even though she didn't have a problem with starting a relationship so quickly....Very weird...She is definitely not ready for sex...She dresses like a 10 cent hooker...I guess she is one of the those girls that likes to tease guys for attention but isn't down for action so quickly...


Anyway, I respected her wishes and she was like she will let me know when she's ready...Honestly, so many girls her age put out so quickly and I've used to having sex pretty quickly within a few dates but this girl is teasing me...I've already spent alot of money on her but I think she is a manipulator...


Anyway, my question is...What are the general rules for touching? Us guys, have to initiate everything...I mean, we are the gas, and they are brakes right? And if a girl is not willing to be intimate and have sex within the first few weeks, does that mean she's not worth the effort?

"Ill let you know" means no. It means she will string you along.

 

[Gangster Of Love]

Just wanted some opinions...

If you are dating a girl or in a committed relationship, what are the "rules" for engaging in intimacy....

I'm asking because for example, the girls I've been with have been relatively open about touching and sex....In general, women like to be touched and aroused...and intimacy is an important part of a relationship. I'm not saying every second of the day but it can occur often...

For example, when I was in a relationship, we both had the right to touch each other pretty much whenever and nobody had an issue...For example, I grabbed my girlfriend's ass in a restaurant and club.....I've never come across an issue like this....

This I just started dating a new girl recently....She's younger and I guess more inexperienced even thought she had a 7 year relationship but she's still in her early 20's. Anyway, we have been dating a week and have had 4 dates...Already made out a couple times...Then she told me she's not going to kiss me whenever since we are not "boyfriend and girlfriend" and that we are just going out....Which I thought was weird...

Then I was like so well let's be boyfriend and girlfriend...Then we starting kissing and I went for the ass grab and she stopped me...Then she started going off about how it's too early for that even though she didn't have a problem with starting a relationship so quickly....Very weird...She is definitely not ready for sex...She dresses like a 10 cent hooker...I guess she is one of the those girls that likes to tease guys for attention but isn't down for action so quickly...


Anyway, I respected her wishes and she was like she will let me know when she's ready...Honestly, so many girls her age put out so quickly and I've used to having sex pretty quickly within a few dates but this girl is teasing me...I've already spent alot of money on her but I think she is a manipulator...


Anyway, my question is...What are the general rules for touching? Us guys, have to initiate everything...I mean, we are the gas, and they are brakes right? And if a girl is not willing to be intimate and have sex within the first few weeks, does that mean she's not worth the effort?

Is this the Colombian gal, with no money?

 

[GrowingPains]

Why’d you wife her after a week?

 

[EyeBRollin]

There are so many mistakes in this post I don't know where to begin. Please read the DJ Bible.

 

[Gangster Of Love]

There are so many mistakes in this post I don't know where to begin. Please read the DJ Bible.

His two posts so far are about this one. Serious oneitis going on.

 

[EyeBRollin]

What the hell, I'll take a crack at it.

Just wanted some opinions...

If you are dating a girl or in a committed relationship, what are the "rules" for engaging in intimacy....

General rules:
The man's job is to create an environment for sex to happen. That means getting her emotions involved, making her feel comfortable, and ensuring the logistics are in place for his dvck to end up in her puvssy.

I'm asking because for example, the girls I've been with have been relatively open about touching and sex....In general, women like to be touched and aroused...and intimacy is an important part of a relationship. I'm not saying every second of the day but it can occur often...

Women like to be touched and aroused after their emotions are engaged.

For example, when I was in a relationship, we both had the right to touch each other pretty much whenever and nobody had an issue...For example, I grabbed my girlfriend's ass in a restaurant and club.....I've never come across an issue like this....

Actually you don't have the right to touch her whenever. That's a rape allegation waiting to happen. You have to facilitate her being comfortable enough to be touched in that specific moment. Even your wife will not appreciate always being greeted by a public ass grabbing.

This I just started dating a new girl recently....She's younger and I guess more inexperienced even thought she had a 7 year relationship but she's still in her early 20's.

This is a rationalization that has nothing to do with anything.

Anyway, we have been dating a week and have had 4 dates...

Huge mistake.

Already made out a couple times...

You get no credit with women for what you did in the past. All that matters to them is how they feel in that moment.

Then she told me she's not going to kiss me whenever since we are not "boyfriend and girlfriend" and that we are just going out....Which I thought was weird...

Your four dates in one week has already dried up her pvssy.

Then I was like so well let's be boyfriend and girlfriend...

Huge mistake #2.

Then we starting kissing and I went for the ass grab and she stopped me...Then she started going off about how it's too early for that even though she didn't have a problem with starting a relationship so quickly

Translation: I like you for now but not that much.

....Very weird...She is definitely not ready for sex...

No shvt. You've done nothing to prime the pump. You've smothered her, groped her, and now expect to have sex with her?

She dresses like a 10 cent hooker...I guess she is one of the those girls that likes to tease guys for attention but isn't down for action so quickly...

How she dresses has zero correlation to if she's ready to have sex with you.

Anyway, I respected her wishes

Good.

and she was like she will let me know when she's ready...Honestly, so many girls her age put out so quickly and I've used to having sex pretty quickly within a few dates but this girl is teasing me...I've already spent alot of money on her but I think she is a manipulator...

She's not teasing or manipulating you. You just have no game. Lots of guys get by on looks or status, which can hold her interest for the first week or two.

Anyway, my question is...What are the general rules for touching? Us guys, have to initiate everything...I mean, we are the gas, and they are brakes right? And if a girl is not willing to be intimate and have sex within the first few weeks, does that mean she's not worth the effort?

The rule is this:
Don't touch her until after she touches you first. If she likes you, she will touch you. Women touch you when they like you. Most of the time they will be subtle about it (accidental bumping or the tap on your arm when they laugh).

As for sex, women have sex when they feel comfortable to do so and the man has created an environment where sex can actually happen. There is no real time limit on that. For most women, it usually is somewhere between 3-6 "dates." Alcohol can expedite this, as does venue changing (walking to 3 bars in one evening can have the same effect as going on 3 dates). Her initial attraction level also can make this happen sooner.

 

[devilkingx2]

Just wanted some opinions...

If you are dating a girl or in a committed relationship, what are the "rules" for engaging in intimacy....

I'm asking because for example, the girls I've been with have been relatively open about touching and sex....In general, women like to be touched and aroused...and intimacy is an important part of a relationship. I'm not saying every second of the day but it can occur often...

For example, when I was in a relationship, we both had the right to touch each other pretty much whenever and nobody had an issue...For example, I grabbed my girlfriend's ass in a restaurant and club.....I've never come across an issue like this....

This I just started dating a new girl recently....She's younger and I guess more inexperienced even thought she had a 7 year relationship but she's still in her early 20's. Anyway, we have been dating a week and have had 4 dates...Already made out a couple times...Then she told me she's not going to kiss me whenever since we are not "boyfriend and girlfriend" and that we are just going out....Which I thought was weird...

Then I was like so well let's be boyfriend and girlfriend...Then we starting kissing and I went for the ass grab and she stopped me...Then she started going off about how it's too early for that even though she didn't have a problem with starting a relationship so quickly....Very weird...She is definitely not ready for sex...She dresses like a 10 cent hooker...I guess she is one of the those girls that likes to tease guys for attention but isn't down for action so quickly...


Anyway, I respected her wishes and she was like she will let me know when she's ready...Honestly, so many girls her age put out so quickly and I've used to having sex pretty quickly within a few dates but this girl is teasing me...I've already spent alot of money on her but I think she is a manipulator...


Anyway, my question is...What are the general rules for touching? Us guys, have to initiate everything...I mean, we are the gas, and they are brakes right? And if a girl is not willing to be intimate and have sex within the first few weeks, does that mean she's not worth the effort?

Some girls are more or less conservative/shy/proud/prudish/etc. Than others. And so you'll run into girls that'll let you fvck them in a mall changing room and girls that wouldn't even show their legs in public.

But if she dresses abnormally slvtty like you say then she probably isn't shy or conservative.

Perhaps she doesn't want to be some slvt taken advantage of by a fvckboy, which makes sense until the part where you get together officially, then she has no excuse.

That means either:

1. She doesn't like you very much if at all. If a girl likes you, It's really easy.

2. She wants to play the field or fish for attention and can't do that with you acting like her boyfriend. The outfits aren't for you they're for everyone else.

Give it 1-3 more weeks (since you've only been dating a week) to make absolutely certain she's playing games or not interested rather than simply not jumping into bed like a slvt. Put your best foot forward game-wise, stop spending money on her and prepare your backup plan(s) for if you dump this girl soon.

 

[MrWood]

we both had the right to touch each other pretty much whenever and nobody had an issue

you are not from, the "West", are you?

What are the general rules for touching?

you are 33yo, and asking about "touching"... wtf

 

[dude99]

Just wanted some opinions...

If you are dating a girl or in a committed relationship, what are the "rules" for engaging in intimacy....

I'm asking because for example, the girls I've been with have been relatively open about touching and sex....In general, women like to be touched and aroused...and intimacy is an important part of a relationship. I'm not saying every second of the day but it can occur often...

For example, when I was in a relationship, we both had the right to touch each other pretty much whenever and nobody had an issue...For example, I grabbed my girlfriend's ass in a restaurant and club.....I've never come across an issue like this....

This I just started dating a new girl recently....She's younger and I guess more inexperienced even thought she had a 7 year relationship but she's still in her early 20's. Anyway, we have been dating a week and have had 4 dates...Already made out a couple times...Then she told me she's not going to kiss me whenever since we are not "boyfriend and girlfriend" and that we are just going out....Which I thought was weird...

Then I was like so well let's be boyfriend and girlfriend...Then we starting kissing and I went for the ass grab and she stopped me...Then she started going off about how it's too early for that even though she didn't have a problem with starting a relationship so quickly....Very weird...She is definitely not ready for sex...She dresses like a 10 cent hooker...I guess she is one of the those girls that likes to tease guys for attention but isn't down for action so quickly...


Anyway, I respected her wishes and she was like she will let me know when she's ready...Honestly, so many girls her age put out so quickly and I've used to having sex pretty quickly within a few dates but this girl is teasing me...I've already spent alot of money on her but I think she is a manipulator...


Anyway, my question is...What are the general rules for touching? Us guys, have to initiate everything...I mean, we are the gas, and they are brakes right? And if a girl is not willing to be intimate and have sex within the first few weeks, does that mean she's not worth the effort?

She is used to dating teenage boys. She has zero experience with men. She needs to be shown you are a man.

Here is what you say:

"Hey princess i understand you are younger and inexperienced, im not here to put any undue pressure on you. That is not who i am. I see you still havent grown up completely only having a relationship that stems back to your early teens, but we clearly are at different stages of our lives. I have been in serious relationships where sex and affection is part of it and to 'wait' until you are ready or until you mature would be going backwards for me. When you're grown up give me a call."

Then walk away.

 

[2Rocky]

She is used to dating teenage boys. She has zero experience with men. She needs to be shown you are a man.

Here is what you say:

"Hey princess i understand you are younger and inexperienced, im not here to put any undue pressure on you. That is not who i am. I see you still havent grown up completely only having a relationship that stems back to your early teens, but we clearly are at different stages of our lives. I have been in serious relationships where sex and affection is part of it and to 'wait' until you are ready or until you mature would be going backwards for me. When you're grown up give me a call."

Then walk away.

These are good sentiments... I concur.

As for touching in public view, treat her the way you would want a cool guy you respected would treat your sister. But be a sexual animal in private.

If I had a daughter with a boyfriend who smacked her ass in front of me, he would get laid out Muhammed Ali style with no explanation.

Chances are 50-50 that it would be my daughter who was standing over him.

 

[Kotaix]

In my experience:

women have an order that they want to be touched in. Touching is first, kisses come second, fondling/grabbing is third and sex is when she gets on top of you. If you're not in an LTR this is true for every time you touch her, and she'll remind you of this by moving your hand away if you break the order.

I'm with her tho on public displays of affection though. I prefer to keep it private at most times.