Question about facebook and asking a girl out

[Falcon25]

I have no idea what the proper way to do this cause I am not on facebook all that much, I have an account with one picture on it.

There's this girl at the bank that I have spoken to a few times, I have no idea if she's single. But she seems to be somewhat interested (looks into my eyes and smiles and plays with her hair, etc.) But the problem is that she is working and I can never time it to where she is my teller so that I can ask her out. So, the creative genius that I am, I read her name and last name on her name tag, I looked on facebook and there she is. My understanding is that I have to ask her to be friends before i can send her a private message.

My plan (tell me if this is horrible or what) is that I can ask her to friend me and then send a private message saying "Hey, I never get a chance to speak with you all that much when you are working but I just wanted to see if you would like to go out sometime". Or something like that.

Here's the problem;

She may not be single
and
I may seem like a creep

What do you guys think of this? I need your best A game on this one. I can keep trying to get her as my teller and her supervisor not watching but it's been three weeks and my timing is terrible. Second, I don't want to embarrass her at her work. Third, I'm sure six hundred other guys have asked her out at work.

Any advice? I'm guessing I have to get a better picture on facebook of myself to do this? I only have one.

 

[Thundernuts]

dont do it, ask her in person, she will know you took the time to get her full name and look her up. YOU WILL COME OFF AS WEIRD

 

[Iceberg]

Extremely weird.

You can't do this through Facebook. "Hey, I glanced at your name tag, wrote down your name, and then looked it up on Facebook. Wanna go out some time?"

If her work schedule is inconveniencing you picking her up, you just have to live with it.

Oh, and really...you gotta spin more plates. Everything about this thread reeks of this chick being the only girl on your radar. I can just tell. I mean, if some chick at the bank was possibly interested in me, I'd probably just say "Oh that's nice." and move on. I damn sure wouldn't be thinking about tracking her down on Facebook.

 

[Pierce]

Dude, Delete your facebook. That's a rookie mistake......You know how many guys hit on girls on facebook??? **** is ridiculous. Be a man and ask her out on a date in person.

 

[J Roc]

get off facebook!

 

[Tiguere]

get off facebook? imposssible these days!

 

[Darth]

get off facebook? imposssible these days!

Not impossible. I'm even in college and I do fine without Fakebook.

 

[Demonpenz]

Hopefully yours goes better than the bank girl I had. I was nervous I guess and they thought I was going to rob the place, but I just asked the girl out. Of course I had to close my account down after what went down.

 

[runner83]

Falcon,

I would definitely not recommend asking her through Facebook. Here's some of the reasons why:

* She may not even know who you are. If you send a friend request, she may not accept it.

* If she does accept and you send her a message, she will check out your profile. If your facebook is minimalistic (as it sounds like it is, mine is similar: I only use mine for friends and family NOT CHICKS) she will use that to interpret your social life.

If there is not a lot of details, random drunken wall postings at all hours, facebook status pics in clubs and 500 friends, she will (rightly or wrongly) draw the conclusion that you are boring and not worth her time, or even worse, think you are a creep who is stalking her.

Strongly recommend sticking to the in person approach for this one.

 

[Borknagar]

I don't know where this whole deleting facebook thing matters. If it wasn't for facebook I wouldn't be banging a ex stripper with a hot bod!

 

[vatoloco]

I may seem like a creep

And you'd be one, man.

"Ohai! I saw your name on your tag and decided to stalk... err, I mean, look you up on Facebook!"

I have my own thoughts on Facebook but this would not be an instance where I'd use it.

You mention getting positive IOIs so what I would do in your case is something like this:

"Hey listen [girl's name], what time do you get off work?"

If she doesn't really dig, she will tense up and come back with:
"Why?"

Since she probably doesn't dig you that way, at that point you defuse the situation with something like "Just curious to see if bank employees left right at closing time or if they had to stay afterwards..." or something innocent like that.

If she responds positively to the inquiry,

"I get out at 5:00PM. Why?"
(or something like that -- with excitement and a smile)

you have two options:

"I wanna get your number but I don't want to get you in trouble. I can come back and get that from you..."

or

"There's a coffee shop [some distance/near/around the corner/close by] that I want you to go with me to..."

If she digs, she'll cooperate.

If she doesn't, well, you'll have your answer. You might have to switch banks, though!

 

[Falcon25]

Okay guys,

I had enough of this and today I finally did something to further this cause.
She was my teller. Her supervisor was behind her and another employee was next to her. They both left for about 45 seconds. This was after I had small talk with her and she took my deposit. So, I had to think quick. Instead of directly asking her out, I asked her if she would like to join us for a drink this weekend (we are going out to drinks, male and female friends of mine) she said she can't because she was having dinner with her parents (who live in another city). But she was smiling and kinda glad I offered. So, I had to do something, at this point I saw her supervisor and co worker from the corner of my eye. I had about 15 seconds, instead of directly asking her out and getting her number (and possibly embarrassing her infront of her supervisor) I said "Oh, well how about I add you on Facebook or something and maybe you can join us some other time, what's your last name (looking at her name tag). She smiled and turned her name plate to me and showed me, she was smiling the whole time, said "yeah! that would be fun!" and I said, "ok, cool, I'll add you on there and hit you up later. Great seeing you!" and walked away. The co worker and supervisor showed up and my 45 seconds was up.

So, my plan; add her on facebook (now that she is expecting it), send a message something saying (not exactly this) "hey, didn't want to be rude and ask your number while you were working, but I would like to take you out sometime, I'm coming back into town next week, if you would like to go out, write me your number so I can call you when I get back. Talk soon."
Just something like that.

What do you guys think? Did I do good with the 45 seconds I had???
Of course, this all depends on whether the girl is single or not. I have no idea who this person is or even if she's single. I don't even know how old she is.

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

That's better... But was it that hard to have her write down her phone number on a card or something.

 

[Falcon25]

That's better... But was it that hard to have her write down her phone number on a card or something.

Great question. When I first walked up, her supervisor was watching her like a hawk. Her co-worker was prying in our conversation. If her and I were alone, of course I would ask her to write the number down. But, I didn't want to be rude, get her in trouble, or "make" her give her number (cause she has no other choice), didn't want to corner her. I also am against asking girls for numbers at work if they are being supervised or girls who have to be nice (tellers, waitresses, etc.) This was not a girl at a retail store helping me try on clothes where we were alone. We were being watched and I seriously didn't feel comfortable. When I'm not comfortable, I go to plan B. If she is aware of my gentleman behavior haha she will appreciate that I didn't ask her number at work (like 1000 other guys probably have done). And, if she's truly interested, I don't think she will mind going the long way instead of the short cut. It just felt weird and uncomfortable with those two fuvkers watching us. I had to go to plan B.

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

You asked her out for drinks though.. The supervisor wasn't watching at that point so you could have easily asked for the number then. If she would still felt pressure then then she would feel pressure about you inviting her out to drinks and felt pressure about the facebook thing.

 

[eckhart tolle]

nicely done. getting her phone number down coulda really ****ed her over. she woulda been forced to say "were not allowed to hit on the customers" there is a proper term for this. and given you a full rejection.

taking down her name tag and adding her on facebook. good move.

even if she says that shes not single. still ask her out and escalate her as if she did not have a boyfriend. even if you admitt youre just going out as friends.

remember that a lot of chicks who currently have boyfriends will not leave them just because they dont know for sure if you just want them for sex a few times and then leave her. she would prefer to stay with her current boyfriend that takes her out all the time than to risk it with you.

so yeah my best advice is keep up the good work and dont get all put down just cuz she has a boyfriend. having a boy friend all that means is that shes gonna leave him and get with you. keep that mentality

 

[runner83]

So, my plan; add her on facebook (now that she is expecting it), send a message something saying (not exactly this) "hey, didn't want to be rude and ask your number while you were working, but I would like to take you out sometime, I'm coming back into town next week, if you would like to go out, write me your number so I can call you when I get back. Talk soon."
Just something like that.

What do you guys think? Did I do good with the 45 seconds I had???
Of course, this all depends on whether the girl is single or not. I have no idea who this person is or even if she's single. I don't even know how old she is.

Dude, I think you did good.

- You avoided the creep thing by adding her on facebook before she even knew wtf you were.

- You didn't embarrass her or get her into trouble at work

- You were severely time constrained, but it looks like she may be interested (although there is a chance she is AW'ing).

Either way, you got the job done.

I think your suggested course of action is sound.

Just make sure (not that you need to know, more for others reading) that you don't fall into the trap of getting into any long chats with her online.

Get her number and meet up in person. You know the rest.

 

[SamTheHobit]

I don't know where this whole deleting facebook thing matters. If it wasn't for facebook I wouldn't be banging a ex stripper with a hot bod!

The majority of strippers are *****s so you basicly ****ing an ex *****, Maybe it is just in my country.

 

[Blurry]

The majority of strippers are *****s so you basicly ****ing an ex *****, Maybe it is just in my country.

I agree. Her being a stripper isn't a good thing and I have no idea why you would want to brag about that.

 

[Falcon25]

I agree. Her being a stripper isn't a good thing and I have no idea why you would want to brag about that.

What the fuvk are you guys talking about?? Get the fuvk out my thread dude. If you are going to talk about something different, create a new thread, fuvking jerk offs.