Quarter life crisis help

Dhoulmagus

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I feel like all my friends have it better than me and I'm just going through hell on my alone. They have better salaries, live in cities, and get laid while I feel like I'm serving a deployment in bfe North Dakota. I could understand if it was for a business I owned or something, but it's just an entry level job after college. I have no desire to be some hot shot vp or something, so I don't see the point. What's the point of enduring all of this then? Four things I want are to become an officer in the militaty(low gpa), travel(no money), live in civilization(no job and less than year of experience), or sex(no girls). Idk what to do at all.
 

Casillas

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First of all you don't need motivation that come and go, you need to change your habits because all the stuff that you have been doing till today it hasn't worked. Second forget about your friends, you don't need to worry about what they are doing with their lives, you need to focus on YOUR life. And finally is not bad that you don't feel comfortable desiring to be some hot shot vp and all that stuff, there are people that work all their life cleaning trash and they feel good about it, not everyone have the same ambitions and goals in life, maybe being and officer in the military is the greatest for you and for other people their dream job is being a lawyer idk, the point is that everyone in this world is different and we all have to do the things that work better for ourselves, so go ahead man and I'm pretty sure that you're going to make it. Don't wait for things to happen GO AND MAKE IT HAPPEN. Good luck!
 

Dhoulmagus

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Ya, I want to be in the Air Force and fly planes or something. Or, switch occupations through the military to engineering or something.
 

Dhoulmagus

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You were probably not born when the movie Top Gun (1986) came out, but every young whipper snapper wanted to join the Air Force to fly a jet. But in reality that doesn't happen, and most end up as cooks, laundry department, scrubbing the deck etc... which there is nothing wrong with anyway, but it is part of being in the military.
Ya, only officers can fly and I'm aware that it is easier to fly in other branches.
 

Asmodeus

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The US military does offer some good opportunities if you already have a degree or some skillset. I know somebody who was an associate of mine in High School a decade ago, who got an engineering degree and joined the Army and became part of its Corps of Engineering. Gets a very good pay from it, and started as a Lieutenant...

http://www.usace.army.mil/Careers/How-to-Apply/

If you want to go for engineering in the military then you certainly can. But I would recommend you get the skills first, because otherwise they will just make you a peon (private 1st class).
 

Dhoulmagus

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The US military does offer some good opportunities if you already have a degree or some skillset. I know somebody who was an associate of mine in High School a decade ago, who got an engineering degree and joined the Army and became part of its Corps of Engineering. Gets a very good pay from it, and started as a Lieutenant...

http://www.usace.army.mil/Careers/How-to-Apply/

If you want to go for engineering in the military then you certainly can. But I would recommend you get the skills first, because otherwise they will just make you a peon (private 1st class).
I have a degree, so I would be an E4 lol. I'm not interested in being enlisted, so is the military still possible?
 

Asmodeus

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Not in the military, would have joined but I likely have too much of a bad history for them to accept me... Not entirely sure about the military structure... However, starting with officer status in the military is possible, but they look for specific things. If you have certain degrees they will give you higher rank. For instance I even know a person who did nursing school and became a Second Lieutenant right out of it, in fact I checked with the military and they only give officer status to such candidates http://www.military-nurse.com/military-nurse-ranks.html. Nurses, engineers, and such have high demand from the military and thus they provide better compensation and better rank. So it depends on what your degree is in and what you have to offer in terms of skills... If you have a special skillset they may give you officer status depending on what you can do, it is worth checking.
 

Dhoulmagus

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Not in the military, would have joined but I likely have too much of a bad history for them to accept me... Not entirely sure about the military structure... However, starting with officer status in the military is possible, but they look for specific things. If you have certain degrees they will give you higher rank. For instance I even know a person who did nursing school and became a Second Lieutenant right out of it, in fact I checked with the military and they only give officer status to such candidates http://www.military-nurse.com/military-nurse-ranks.html. Nurses, engineers, and such have high demand from the military and thus they provide better compensation and better rank. So it depends on what your degree is in and what you have to offer in terms of skills... If you have a special skillset they may give you officer status depending on what you can do, it is worth checking.
hmmm about your previous post. Could I enlist in the navy or something and use it to obtain a degree in the medical field, engineering, computers, or etc? BTW, don't ever work in the business field lol.
 

Atom Smasher

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If I were you I'd make it a point to watch encouraging and motivating videos every single morning. Let that be your own time for charging your mental batteries with motivation and a change of perspective. It must be replenished every day until the principles become internalized, but a steady diet of this can do wonders for your perspective and your self-belief.
 

Good Gao

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Dhoul, mah boy, you need to stop focusing on girls right now. I usually don't recommend watching porn but if you have to rub one out in case the urges get strong, just do it. You have to get your life in order, I thought you at least had a high GPA given how you said you were in a fraternity (fraternities check for GPA every semester or year in my experience). Get your finances and career path in order like right now. I do not know what your major in college was but I sure hope it was employable.

You're not going to be an officer in the military with a poor GPA and even then, military is a long time commitment (at least 5 years) and by then, your 20s would have passed you by.

I do not know what you do for work but I would work on getting some work experience under your belt and maybe in a couple of years, if you can do well on the GRE or GMAT (depends on what you want to do), go to grad school. Do not go with the intention of partying, go with the intention of helping you land the job you want. You have to seriously think what you want to do for a career and what is employable.

My early 20s were rough too man but I had a good GPA and many career options to fall back on, you're kinda SOL for the time being. I recommend leaving so suave, joining a forum for career advice (whichever career you have an interest in), start studying for grad school exams if necessary since you seem to have the free time for it, and get your career path in order ASAP.

Building a career becomes a lot more difficult once you enter your 30s, some career paths (investment banking and management consulting) start to become closed off for good.
 
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I definitely know how you feel as I felt it for a couple of months or so after graduation, even worse I was stuck back home with parents during that time, not fun at all. All the while I saw my friends moving to big cities, getting good jobs, partying, and being so excited about what life had in store for them. I still remember that feeling I had when a good friend of mines got a job in NYC, moved into an amazing apartment in Manhattan with a few friends, and was spending his weekends partying hard at the bars there.

Luckily for me, a couple of jobs I had applied for came back with interview offers and I ended up getting a job in a big city (not exactly NYC though). If things couldn't get any better, a couple of my good friends from back in college lived in the same apartment as I did and the apartment promoted a pretty good social life (roof-top pool, most residents in their 20s, bars near by, etc.). Life definitely picked up for me as I would go out with a couple of my good friends and enjoy some fun social events (concerts, nights at bars, and intramural sports) with them. I have never been happier as I am now.

From what I can see from your situation, this is my advice.

You won't be an officer in the military with bad grades, even if it was possible, the path would require a long time for you and will likely take away years of your life which will make all of the other things in your list difficult. I would recommend dropping this dream unless you're very serious about it. You don't have the money to travel right now and even your travel experiences won't be as good if you have to be cheap, worry about that later.

What you can do something about is your location, I am sure that there is a way that you can get a job in a bigger city once you have a year or so of work experience under your belt. If I was you, I would focus strictly on fixing that part of your life and worrying about the other things on your list a little bit later.
 

Dhoulmagus

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Dhoul, mah boy, you need to stop focusing on girls right now. I usually don't recommend watching porn but if you have to rub one out in case the urges get strong, just do it. You have to get your life in order, I thought you at least had a high GPA given how you said you were in a fraternity (fraternities check for GPA every semester or year in my experience). Get your finances and career path in order like right now. I do not know what your major in college was but I sure hope it was employable.

You're not going to be an officer in the military with a poor GPA and even then, military is a long time commitment (at least 5 years) and by then, your 20s would have passed you by.

I do not know what you do for work but I would work on getting some work experience under your belt and maybe in a couple of years, if you can do well on the GRE or GMAT (depends on what you want to do), go to grad school. Do not go with the intention of partying, go with the intention of helping you land the job you want. You have to seriously think what you want to do for a career and what is employable.

My early 20s were rough too man but I had a good GPA and many career options to fall back on, you're kinda SOL for the time being. I recommend leaving so suave, joining a forum for career advice (whichever career you have an interest in), start studying for grad school exams if necessary since you seem to have the free time for it, and get your career path in order ASAP.

Building a career becomes a lot more difficult once you enter your 30s, some career paths (investment banking and management consulting) start to become closed off for good.
I have a career and many career options, but they are all back in the southeast. I want to live on the Pacific coast or mountain west, but those places are harder to get business jobs and I'm farther from my network base. My major is employable, but I don't care about working in some corporate office and being the head corporate overseer in 5 years. In my major, it is smarter to have the company pay for your mba. In addition, I'm not wasting any more money on schooling lol.
 

Dhoulmagus

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I definitely know how you feel as I felt it for a couple of months or so after graduation, even worse I was stuck back home with parents during that time, not fun at all. All the while I saw my friends moving to big cities, getting good jobs, partying, and being so excited about what life had in store for them. I still remember that feeling I had when a good friend of mines got a job in NYC, moved into an amazing apartment in Manhattan with a few friends, and was spending his weekends partying hard at the bars there.

Luckily for me, a couple of jobs I had applied for came back with interview offers and I ended up getting a job in a big city (not exactly NYC though). If things couldn't get any better, a couple of my good friends from back in college lived in the same apartment as I did and the apartment promoted a pretty good social life (roof-top pool, most residents in their 20s, bars near by, etc.). Life definitely picked up for me as I would go out with a couple of my good friends and enjoy some fun social events (concerts, nights at bars, and intramural sports) with them. I have never been happier as I am now.

From what I can see from your situation, this is my advice.

You won't be an officer in the military with bad grades, even if it was possible, the path would require a long time for you and will likely take away years of your life which will make all of the other things in your list difficult. I would recommend dropping this dream unless you're very serious about it. You don't have the money to travel right now and even your travel experiences won't be as good if you have to be cheap, worry about that later.

What you can do something about is your location, I am sure that there is a way that you can get a job in a bigger city once you have a year or so of work experience under your belt. If I was you, I would focus strictly on fixing that part of your life and worrying about the other things on your list a little bit later.
so pretty much just last another 4 months at my current job? I've already had a couple of interviews with different companies, but I turned them down because they were all in Nashville or Atlanta. I'm scared to apply anywhere else too.
 

skinnyguy

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It's easy to find a job in California but lots of people move out because of the cost of living.

If you're with most of your income going to your rent, Cali is the place for you.
 

Dhoulmagus

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I never thought the military was doable and yall have confirmed this. I guess I'll go with my other plan of just leaving the country within 5 years. What country doesn't extort its immigrants?
 

Asmodeus

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America is not perfect... But I still think it will be hard to find a better situation for yourself in another nation. The grass is always greener on the other side, or so it seems.
 

Peace and Quiet

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Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

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