Quality of advice

Dali_tx_o

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Hello gentlemen,

I have noticed an alarming trend - when skimming through recent posts and replies, I have noticed that a lot of advice given is... well, to put it bluntly, ****.

Bear with me. I am not saying that all advice given here is useless - what I am saying is that the noise-to-signal ratio is getting worse, and a lot of opinions are coming from people it seems don't really get laid.

Am I a Don Juan? Not sure, probably not, but since discovering the Red Pill I've grown a lot, and I am on my path to get there. I had above average amount of sexual partners when looking at statistics, and although I still do quite a few things wrong, there is often I moment when I read about something I have done before in the archives (or some other websites on the subject) and find out that it correlates with my personal findings. And, I do my best to learn.

Heck, the reason why I started participating in these forums is because of a one-itis, which, hopefully, I have managed to beat. Me myself, I share what I believe is right (End of History illusion, anyone?), but after some time passes, I find that I may have been wrong and at least refrain from posting afterwards when I feel like I want to chime in, even if my actions in similar situation have resulted in success.

And yet, I see so many opinions from people that may seem to know what they are talking about (see post count and reputation), yet they say something that contradicts the core of what I have found in the archives. Even some of the advice that has the right ring to it bears a lot of that blue-pill, beta, whatever-you-call-it-***** sidekick on the side, slowly skimming tested seduction knowledge with "loveshack advice".

I am wondering, am I the only who feels like this? I am not sure if there is any way to prevent this "skimming", as more and more people are joining the forums and red-pill movement (whereas, they fail to internalize the truths and tested advices smoothly/quickly enough), but I have thought that some measure as "partner count" could serve as a useful measure to see how worthy the advice is.

What are your opinions? With the amount of girls you have slept with, do you believe you are qualified to give worthy advice? Or am I only one to think so?
 

Epimanes

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Why does the amount of women you slept with mean your successful? The honeymoon stage of any relationship is always easy to manage because for the most part neither one of you know each other very well and want to learn about eachother and are more willing to sacrifice to keep each other happy in the short term which also means sometimes it takes a while for our "quarks" to come out. I don't believe that success and valid advice should be rated by the lay count you have. I believe sound advice comes from those who have found success is keeping a relationship alive after the honeymoon phase wears off and you learn to keep recreating the honeymoon phase and experience life together while finding mutual happiness at the same time. But that's just me.. WTF do I know right?
 

Dali_tx_o

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I do not disagree. Times change, and so does game to stay potent.

But what was regarded as "Girl is not worth your time" is now becoming "Yeah, she's not great, but you could still get her if <x> (myself, probably, guilty of this). It is like the whole SoSuave is getting softer, yet what most of the accounts show, women/girls are only getting harder.

It just seems that compared to the of archives, current posts are just.. well, fluff. Or maybe there was always fluff, and only the true and tested advice survived.

EDIT:

Epimanes - sure, I would rather have a happy and fulfilling long term relationship, but your question itself is what I meant.

"Why does the amount of women you slept with mean your successful?"

Because, unless you are dumpster diving or paying for sex, it is a general measure to tell how good you are with attracting women. Which is why most of the people are here, I assume.

Do I want to have a long term, happy relationship? I believe so, although I am on the line where I am deciding if such relationship is for me.

But who is more qualified to tell you how to achieve this - some guy who struck it with his high-school girlfriend, got married, and is now 25, or the 25 year old who got laid with 75 girls? When people know how to get a good, quality girl, they do really need to know how you keep the attraction for long term. But most of the guys get lovestruck with the first hot girl they meet, even if she is awful for a long term relationship. What is the point of giving advice from "Happily married" point of view when most of your public can't even get a girl to kiss, and even further, if they kiss the wrong girl?

EDIT again:

Thinking about it, "lay count" is an objective measure. Better would be a "lay count with quality of girls laid taken into account", but that veers into somewhat subjective territory - probably getting ahead of ourselves.

Hypothetically:

One can be happy in a long term relationship with a long term relationship with a fat and not attractive american girlfiend, because he can't do better.
And yet, one can be unhappy with 3 open long term relationships with three hot girlfriends.

Which one would you rather hear advice from? And then, wouldn't it be better to give you a choice, to choose whether you just want a chubby girlfiend, or a hot one? Who has more experience?

I do come from assumption that most of the men here want a hot, feminine woman that they would proud of, but yet again, I have to accept that my goals might be different from someone else. Yet, I would rather have an option to choose whom to take advice from from past/current experience (based on if their experience match my goals) than get a pile of advice that mostly do no apply to my goals.
 

The Duke

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Here is something I've learned in life...........the people that do all the talking aren't the ones who are really worth listening to. Most of them are full of schitt, and love to hear(see) themselves talk(type).

The quiet types are the ones who know whats going on.

Listening(reading) skills will get you further down the road than talking(typing) skills.
 

Epimanes

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I see you point. And I married my high school sweet heart and been with her for 20 years now. We had sex like rabbits for a long time until kids arrived and it got much harder and put a ton of strain on our relationship. A lot of guys here would have probably nexted her in that situation because of their own selfishness. Yeah I had it rough for many years but I also take responsibility for making the kids too so I had to have some patience because things could not be spontaneous like they used to be. Now however. My kids are 9 and 15. And my patience paid off and we are turning around full swing back to what it used to be like. I had years of little to no sex (mostly duty sex on my wifes part due to her loss of libido caused by pregnancy scaring her vag real bad and taking away her sensations) when my kids were young. Marriagebuilders and SS advice combined have made things a ton easier and our future is looking brighter than ever. All the while we are finding more time together now and finding ways to make her pleasure easier.

Did it suck? You bet it did .. Did we have huge fights over sex? You bet we did... Did I get thoughts of leaving and fantasize of better sex with other women when my sex life sucked? Yes I did. Did I feel like I got ripped of and want to divorce? Yes I did. But I didn't next her for my own self gratification when things were tough. We found ways to make it work and it gets easier and easier as the kids get older.

Now we have sex enthusiasticly like 2 or 3 times a week. I'm good with that. So is she and we found a away around her issue with her vagina having less sensitivity making it harder for her to ***.
Edit: added a few things and the stuff below.

Basicly my point is that in a long term relationship its not always going to be perfect. Your not always going to get your needs met the way you want them to be met. In the beginning of any relationship its easy to meet needs when there is a ton less responsibility but once the responsibility ramps up it gets a lot harder. Much MUCH harder infact. In my situation it was not that my wife was not attracted to me. I have always been fit. So is she. The problem was my wifes lack of libido due to her ripping during child birth. It took away her sexual sensations. She could no long cvm as easy and that frusterated her to hell. To the point she didn't want to bother much. How do you overcome that? When all is good but the sex due to lack of time to explore options (partly due to lack of family support to make time) and kids running around all day making sexy time hard to accomplish.

Does only having sex with my wife for 20 years make my advice less usefull than someone who has banged a new chick every week for 20 years?
 

confuscioused

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You have to consider the kind of girls you are banging and do they qualify as a bonafied lay that even a buffoon can get with no skill or looks. I know guys that have nailed around 200 girls but most of them are much over weight and no challenge to the average guy looking to score 8 thru 10's on the looks scale. The only lays I'm proud of are the hot girls in any guys standards that put up the most resistance to overcome that have turned me on the most!! Those are the ones that you remember, not the fatties in the bar at 2AM that every guy and his brother nailed.
 

skinnyguy

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confuscioused said:
You have to consider the kind of girls you are banging and do they qualify as a bonafied lay that even a buffoon can get with no skill or looks. I know guys that have nailed around 200 girls but most of them are much over weight and no challenge to the average guy looking to score 8 thru 10's on the looks scale. The only lays I'm proud of are the hot girls in any guys standards that put up the most resistance to overcome that have turned me on the most!! Those are the ones that you remember, not the fatties in the bar at 2AM that every guy and his brother nailed.
^this
 

Dali_tx_o

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Epimanes:

Just saw the edit. Did not mean it that way.

I am not saying "lay count" is the sure, tell all sign of the quality of advice. I am saying it is just "something", that could be a basis, and that could be developed. Married man is probably section where your advice would be spot on, but to one who cannot get a girl to kiss, that advice will not bear much good.

"Lay count" would probably fit SoSuave because most of the old messages keep saying that "women are replaceable", therefore, one who has replaced many women should know better. Perhaps it is flawed conclusion that will prove false over time, however, at the moment, it seems the most true. So shouldn't it be held in more importance until new evidence surfaces?

And, my point of post was not the "married man" advice. More of the recent advice I see contains the "be nice to her, supplicate her" undertones that seem to go against what SoSuave seems to teach, that seems to come from "beta white-knights" or whatever you call them. That is what I am against, and given the target audience for the forum where I placed this message, I believe it is relevant to.
 

Epimanes

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Oh I know. Its a tough meat market out there these days and I am glad I am not in it. Thought about it... But I doubt its worth it. I bought the farm so I gotta fix it when it breaks :)

You should just cold approach often. Date often. But don't use women. Keep looking for mrs right.. Now.. All women are going to have times of hardship. The real test is sticking it out and being a rock and unmoved during those times. Unless she's crazy and cheating on you... All women are crazy.. Just gotta find the one you can put up with. Haha! :) lucky for me I found mine right away. I knew it.. God doesn't give you anymore than you can handle. (If you have any spiritual beliefs that is).

In fact. The marriage builders site says no moving in before marriage (co habilited couples have highest divorce rate) and to date at least 30 people before you settle down. I didn't do either... And it was tough. But its getting better and I'm fixing the farm one 2x4 at a time :)
 

Solomon

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Dali_tx_o said:
Hello gentlemen,

I have noticed an alarming trend - when skimming through recent posts and replies, I have noticed that a lot of advice given is... well, to put it bluntly, ****.

Bear with me. I am not saying that all advice given here is useless - what I am saying is that the noise-to-signal ratio is getting worse, and a lot of opinions are coming from people it seems don't really get laid.

Am I a Don Juan? Not sure, probably not, but since discovering the Red Pill I've grown a lot, and I am on my path to get there. I had above average amount of sexual partners when looking at statistics, and although I still do quite a few things wrong, there is often I moment when I read about something I have done before in the archives (or some other websites on the subject) and find out that it correlates with my personal findings. And, I do my best to learn.

Heck, the reason why I started participating in these forums is because of a one-itis, which, hopefully, I have managed to beat. Me myself, I share what I believe is right (End of History illusion, anyone?), but after some time passes, I find that I may have been wrong and at least refrain from posting afterwards when I feel like I want to chime in, even if my actions in similar situation have resulted in success.

And yet, I see so many opinions from people that may seem to know what they are talking about (see post count and reputation), yet they say something that contradicts the core of what I have found in the archives. Even some of the advice that has the right ring to it bears a lot of that blue-pill, beta, whatever-you-call-it-***** sidekick on the side, slowly skimming tested seduction knowledge with "loveshack advice".

I am wondering, am I the only who feels like this? I am not sure if there is any way to prevent this "skimming", as more and more people are joining the forums and red-pill movement (whereas, they fail to internalize the truths and tested advices smoothly/quickly enough), but I have thought that some measure as "partner count" could serve as a useful measure to see how worthy the advice is.

What are your opinions? With the amount of girls you have slept with, do you believe you are qualified to give worthy advice? Or am I only one to think so?
I agree and disagree with you.

First you gotta understand a lot of the advice is synomous so it gets rehash. However I'm curious if you could post some examples with stuff that you feel contradicts the site.

One thing that I learned really earlier on this site. Is that everyone here gives advice with a bias, and that's fine because your experince is gonna dicate how you view a situation. The problem is though when you have people giving advice who are not qualified to give it. For instance a virgin was giving advice on how to give sex here (srs). The truth is this, a lot of guys here aren't successfull as they claim or bitter/jaded

Exhibit A

I've been here for 5 years and I have noticed and spoken out numerous times agiasnt the shift. Those green dots next to my name, I didn't get them from writing elqouent post, or long mastbutory topics. I suck at writing, my grammar is poor, and I make numerous spelling and puncatiaton mistkaes. I got those dots form writing field reports and trasncribing my experinces. Field Reports are virtually dead here, and now all a guy has to do is write a couple "women are *****s and EFF feminsim" post and he's got a few green dots.

One thing I learned is that you have to use Critical Thinking I try to detach my emotions form a situation because I know that like most people here, if you let your emotions factor in, it will cloud your judgement. This is why you see threads where a guy asking for advice and if he doesn't hear what he likes he is gonna not follow the advice.
 

Dali_tx_o

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confuscioused said:
You have to consider the kind of girls you are banging and do they qualify as a bonafied lay that even a buffoon can get with no skill or looks. I know guys that have nailed around 200 girls but most of them are much over weight and no challenge to the average guy looking to score 8 thru 10's on the looks scale. The only lays I'm proud of are the hot girls in any guys standards that put up the most resistance to overcome that have turned me on the most!! Those are the ones that you remember, not the fatties in the bar at 2AM that every guy and his brother nailed.
Again, I agree with the message - I wrote down my last reply to thread before I saw the post. As I mentioned - sure, "lay count" is not a sure sign for the advice, and better measures of quality could be devised. What I am saying though, is that it is a start, and the "advice" I am so critical about comes from men who, I believe, seem to have a very low "lay count with buffoons", that believe they know everything yet they have only read some of the red pill knowledge, without the practical experience.

EDIT:

Solomon - I just saw your reply.

I do still catch myself thinking, that perhaps there is no use of the current forum, since most of the knowledge in the field has been already written down (hence, why I read mostly the archives and websites, some are which are no more online and only accessible through the Internet Wayback machine). I do think that if everyone read most of what was written before, majority of new threads would disappear, since there would be no need for them. Only very new guys would post, and replies would direct them to nearly identical questions someone else had in the past. Me myself, I went through somewhat similar situation of emotional disbelief at given advice at first. I believe it is a different discussion altogether, so I'd rather leave this for sometime later.

What you describe - " people giving advice who are not qualified to give it" - is exactly what I mean. I'd be more happy to read replies if I knew whether the guy giving his advice is a virgin, is married for 10 years, or has bedded 24 women in last year, since that would give me the choice of knowing what to follow, depending on my goals. I am not an old member here, so I remember this weird feeling: when I first read SoSuave, I wasn't sure what advice was good or bad. I wanted to lump everything either into "well, that's all crap" or "well, that's all golden", without knowing who has written specific advice, based only on my personal experience in the past or my upbringing. I remember thinking "Nah, they're wrong, this girl is special" only to find myself reading through tens of pages from NC thread just to find myself wrong.

Going further, it is perhaps why so many men (Blue-pill men?) do not believe in what is written here, because they simply think it is just a fantasy of some virgins on internet. I tend to think that I have an open and critical mind, but if I had just know who (in terms of achievement) stand behind the advice here, I know I would have internalized advice given here a lot quicker, without surfing the net for hundreds of hours for nuggets or truth.

I do think that if everyone would have read most of the SoSuave and red-pill blogs/posts with open mind, one could differentiate between **** advice and true, field tested reality. Heck, I don't really know what would be solution to all this problem, I don't even know if it a problem, or if it is just me. That is why I wanted to know if anyone else feels similar.

As per concrete advice I have in mind, you will have to give me a bit of time. I will see to compile a little list, together with comparisons through time, that might show what I mean.
 
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