Q&A With Speer =----> June Edition

[Speer Method]

Hey guys,

This Q&A was a great success on LoveSystems and many got their questions answered. I wanted to yet again take the time and answer your questions. I am a great believer in giving back to the community that has given me so much. Also hope to see all of you at the LS Super Conference in Vegas!

Just so you know this thread will ONLY be active for one week.

Lastly you should know no question is a bad question.

So, fire away!

 

[Thyme]

ok here is one that i have had trouble finding the answer to...

and for a bit of a preface: one of my girlfriends has an ex (who she dumped about 6 months ago). the ex rebounded and got a younger girl right away (kinda pathetic, a big jump down from my girl). anyways the ex broke up with the rebound and now is calling/texting/emailing my girl all the time. she ignores most of his calls while she is wit me and says he is the most annoying kid ever now... very clingy and awkward. but she says she is too nice to tell him "leave me fvking alone". he is causing her a lot of grief bcz he puts alot of blame on her and she is too nice to realize its not her fault.

so what should i be doing, if anything? or should i be advising her to do something ??

thanks man

 

[Speer Method]

ok here is one that i have had trouble finding the answer to...

and for a bit of a preface: one of my girlfriends has an ex (who she dumped about 6 months ago). the ex rebounded and got a younger girl right away (kinda pathetic, a big jump down from my girl). anyways the ex broke up with the rebound and now is calling/texting/emailing my girl all the time. she ignores most of his calls while she is wit me and says he is the most annoying kid ever now... very clingy and awkward. but she says she is too nice to tell him "leave me fvking alone". he is causing her a lot of grief bcz he puts alot of blame on her and she is too nice to realize its not her fault.

so what should i be doing, if anything? or should i be advising her to do something ??

thanks man

In this scenario the best thing is to give him enough rope to hang himself. The more needy behavior he displays the more your girl is not going to want to be with him, and the more likely she will continue wanting to be with you.

Ever heard the expression "Its always quietest before the storm?"
This is a true statement. If you noticed that your girl mutes her phone, turns it off or any suspicious behavior like that then you have something to worry about, but she is simply ignoring him. You also dont want to become needy yourself then you would join the suicide hotline her ex is on.

Best advice is to ignore it and dont become needy. Her ex will hang himself. You should just let him do it, or at the weakest point kick the chair from under him.

Be carefree, have fun, and dont worry about it at all.

Say lvi lvi

 

[Thyme]

thank you dude. that is just the advice i was looking for and it makes sense to me. thanks

 

[johann]

Hi

Don't know if the Q & A is still open but here goes,

When faced with certain obstacles how do you go about getting breakthroughs. Example going from number closes to Day 2.

With all the different schools of thought, what do you do to find a solution without the help of mentor or a wing that can actually hep you. Is it a matter of trial and error before you get it?

 

[I'm in the Mood]

I know that you need a certain level of communication to attract a girl into seeing you as a guy she might want a relationship with, but what have you found is the best way to build yourself the background that it takes to be warm and entertaining with any woman?

I know there are "attraction techniques" and shyt like that but really, you know those people who seem like they know stuff about almost everything? People that can make almost anyone laugh easily, people who tell stories and know jokes...How do you prep yourself to become this kind of person?

I know it takes experience, but there must be ways to deep-root the beginnings of this "personality type" into yourself so you can learn how to fully develop it. I'm wondering if you can help me out here with this question. It's quite difficult for me to answer myself because I believe I don't have this noble level of personality. Maybe you know a way, maybe not.

Thanks for reading. I must admit I like this Q&A idea a lot. Sosuave needs more helpful stuff like this.

 

[Solomon]

How often do you go out?
and whats the best way to make sure a girl doesn't flake on you when you number closed her a "couple" dances on the dancefloor or just a short time of "building rapport" ?

 

[Krock]

edit: found a good answer elsewhere, post unnecessary

 

[Speer Method]

Hi

Don't know if the Q & A is still open but here goes,

When faced with certain obstacles how do you go about getting breakthroughs. Example going from number closes to Day 2.

With all the different schools of thought, what do you do to find a solution without the help of mentor or a wing that can actually hep you. Is it a matter of trial and error before you get it?

Sorry for the long delay. I recently had a root canal which wasn't a pleasant experience and it caused me to have massive pain to the point that I didn't do any work since I couldn't concentrate.

Anyway, as far as your question...

Day 2 are usually easier to concrete if you built solid comfort and connected emotionally to your target. Here are a couple of examples:

-You can use text game by recalling the emotional connection that you ran during the set.

- Call back Humor is also a great way to get a positive response. Again focusing on emotions such as joy, happiness, excitement, ect...

- If you created conspiracy during the set, it is also easy to build off that to make the day 2 happen.

- Often times people go to the same places. This is great if you invite your set to the place where you two first met. It will allow you to build off of the vibe you originally had with your target and will make her feel comfortable enough to join you.

Last few notes...

Stay in set for a good while after pulling the number this will help build comfort..

Build emotional connection that you may later recall..

Use humor and conspiracy theories..

Build a base line vibe between you and your set..

There is much more detail I can get into but this should give you a good start..

Good Luck,

 

[Speer Method]

I know that you need a certain level of communication to attract a girl into seeing you as a guy she might want a relationship with, but what have you found is the best way to build yourself the background that it takes to be warm and entertaining with any woman?

I know there are "attraction techniques" and shyt like that but really, you know those people who seem like they know stuff about almost everything? People that can make almost anyone laugh easily, people who tell stories and know jokes...How do you prep yourself to become this kind of person?

I know it takes experience, but there must be ways to deep-root the beginnings of this "personality type" into yourself so you can learn how to fully develop it. I'm wondering if you can help me out here with this question. It's quite difficult for me to answer myself because I believe I don't have this noble level of personality. Maybe you know a way, maybe not.

Thanks for reading. I must admit I like this Q&A idea a lot. Sosuave needs more helpful stuff like this.

Guys since I try to give back to the community very often I run this Q&A on many forums and ask you to please limit yourself to 1 question at a time. Once your question is answered you may ask another.

Thanks

Now...

1. As far as your background.. Your background is not important. What is important is that you have a solid lifestyle and good personality. Its important to connect emotionally to the girl otherwise you are just another person trying to pick her up. The truth of the matter is girls tend to get into relationships quickly as a trial basis. They want to believe in the idea that Love at First Sight exists and you can be that guy. Work on your lifestyle, social circle, and enjoyment of life. Allow her to enter your life, dont work to hard to enter hers right off the bat. She must earn that.

2. First off you inject yourself into a good social circle/scene. This will allow you to become more calibrated to the people and environments you are in. There is no magic pill that makes you a "cool guy" It is a process of learning through trial and error. You are armed a little better then most because you have a community of people sharing their trial and error process and trying to help you along the way.

3. I spent over 5 years developing my identity. This was the key to my success with women. I lost 55 Lbs, work on movies and tv shows as a stand in, extra, featured, PA, and Producer ( My transformation: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZAoHOcd9Ko ). This allowed me to inject myself into the model/actress social circle. I spent 12 hours a day, 5 days a week for a period of 5 years talking to models and actresses. This is what allowed me to easily build a vibe with any girl at any time. Also when you spend that much time building relationships you learn valuable lessons. Today I teach most of the tactics I used in my Bootcamps, but I am sure the information I am giving will help you greatly.

Here are my quick list of improvements that will get you the results you are looking for...

1. Become part of a Social Circle/Scene where there are plenty of girls present.

2. Work on building your identity. Realize who you are and who you want to become.

3. Set up your life with events to go to from beach volleyball, clubs to private parties. This will help concrete your lifestyle.

4. Be yourself! Do not work on becoming something you are not. This will seem in congruent and make you fake. This is the reason most PUAs do not have girlfriends.

5. Build a social network of girls. They will help you realize alot and will also help you with other girls. Having women on your side is a very helpful tool.

Hope this answers your questions...

 

[Speer Method]

How often do you go out?
and whats the best way to make sure a girl doesn't flake on you when you number closed her a "couple" dances on the dancefloor or just a short time of "building rapport" ?

I go out 3 to 4 times a week, but when I first started I went out 5 to 6 days a week. Both doing day and night game. The truth is you should go out any time you have free time. This will give you more experience which we all know is the best route to go.

Dance floor number closes are decent but its important to stay in set after. All girls leave the dance floor at one point or another and that is a great opportunity to reengage. The cool thing is if you leave her on the dance floor after grinding/dancing for a while it will demo high value. This is because every guy trys to get touchy feely on the dance floor, and then they escalate until they become needy. When you can walk away with minimal kino she will feel comfortable talking to you after she is off the dance floor.

If you dont have the time and the set runs short. Its best to hook her with an emotional thread that you can recall when you text/call her. Its also an advantage to invite her to the same venue or ask when she will be there again because you had fun together. You can also invite her to a near by venue from the one you met. You see If she felt comfortable with you there she will feel comfortable meeting you there or near by.

The few tricks to getting the most out of short sets are:

- Building buying temperature that you can recall
- Call back humor works well
- Displaying real value through storytelling
- Instant Value Demonstration that is easy to recall with text/phone
- Emotional Bond/Connection
- Conspiracy Theory is useful for creating a last full impression
- Creating solid commonalities
- Being a good dancer lol

Although Ideal situation is you stay in set between 20 to 30 minutes after you number close. This makes the girl feel comfortable with you. It also helps build solid report and an unforgettable impression.

Hope this helps. Guys I do not get paid for doing this FREE Q&A's All I would like for you to do is give us your feedback and rate our threads.

Thanks,