Put on heavy kino and still got denied kiss at end of the night

[T-Mack]

Last night I took a girl out dancing that has been in the majority of my classes for the past two years because we have the same major. Then we went to a pimps and ho party afterwards and I was her pimp and before going over to the party she buys me a forty and cookies.

Everything seemed smooth sailing until the drinking started at the party. We were touching each other heavily (hand holding and grinding) the majority of the time during the beginning of the party. We were even feeding each other food at the party. Then she starts getting a little crazy and starts giving a lap dance to another guy and grinding on other dudes. For some reason I let that piss me off. Well I go outside and have a smoke and start hitting on other girls but that didn’t lead to anything. We leave the party and hold hands going back to my car to go back over to her place.

She makes me a grill cheese and we talk for a bit. I wanted to kiss her but couldn’t find the right moment and kept getting nervous thinking about it. Then she said she was going to bed and I said how about a good night kiss. I know I wasn’t thinking at the time and stupid crap kept coming out of my mouth. She denied that and said she wasn’t interested in seeing anyone and only wanted to be friends. I know of course this is crap and it only means I’m not interested in seeing you. I came back with telling her I wasn’t interested in dating anyone either. Then she goes on about if I wanted to kiss her that means I want to date her. I start being a jerk to her and stupid crap kept coming out of my mouth. It came to the point where she said you’re being really creepy right now I’m going to bed and locking my door if you keep this up.

I am aware I made some huge mistakes and I feel like an idiot after it all happened but I can’t deny my natural urges to want to bang this girl. I’m not going to pretend to be her plutonic friend. I think the biggest mistake I made was not trying to make out with her at the party before going back to her place and thinking about making the move too much was a bad idea and another one was asking for the goodnight kiss. What would you guys have done?

I have not talked to her since the party and I have to see her everyday of the week in class. Should I just play it off and act like nothing happened. I almost apologized to her that same night for my behavior towards her. For the most part I’m just really confused to why I got rejected. I’ve put in a lot of kino like this in the past and have always got at least a kiss by the end of the night.

 

[MascaraSnake]

First things first, you let the lap dance stuff piss you off...bad move. Even if you said nothing it's hard to hide that (might be easier if you're a poker professional, but I doubt you are). From what I can see it looks like the feeding-each-other-and-holding-hands flirtiness took a downhill curve after that, but I wasn't there.

You also ASKED for the kiss...maybe it's possible for that to work, but I don't do that. I'd have gotten her on the couch or something similar so I could smoothly kino her, read her, and decide whether a kiss was a possibility. You also appeared needy when she denied it...if you really felt that the date went well, you could have waited another date for it.

As to where you stand, I don't know. Can't tell you if this is nuked...I have no clue if she sent you mixed signals or if you really screwed it all up. If you still think there's a chance, though, pursue other women and try to talk to her less often than you did...she might come back and ask you out again. If that's the case, make it all on your terms, not hers.

 

[bam bam]

Hey t-mack,

your story is missing a lot of pieces. If you can be more detailed on the interactions you guys have had prior to this it would help a lot. You mentioned a few things which are good like the fact she bought you something, you guys danced and played with each other. But t-mack who asks for a kiss? lol if your nervous about a kiss it's time to kiss... just go for it dude why sit there thinking about it? you think if you contemplate the matter for long enough you will have a vision and will hit the perfect time? The right time is the time you make it. If her actions are congruent with what you think should happen just do it. Also what kind of date are you on when she's grinding with other men? I think someone her is confused of what went on that night. Learn to read situations better and next time around. Only way you'll be able to do that is by getting more experience. Also why are you waiting so long before asking out a girl who has been in your class for so long?

As what to do next? Nothing what do you want to do? Anything you do asides from playing it off that nothing big happened will make you look like a hump. If you want to get this girl (I personally wouldn't waste my time to many other woman out there) but act like nothing happen and start hitting on another girl that's better looking then her or she hates. Start showing her your a desirable man not a desperate kiss beggar.

 

[Jmasta23]

Last night I took a girl out dancing that has been in the majority of my classes for the past two years because we have the same major. Then we went to a pimps and ho party afterwards and I was her pimp and before going over to the party she buys me a forty and cookies.

Everything seemed smooth sailing until the drinking started at the party. We were touching each other heavily (hand holding and grinding) the majority of the time during the beginning of the party. We were even feeding each other food at the party. Then she starts getting a little crazy and starts giving a lap dance to another guy and grinding on other dudes. For some reason I let that piss me off. Well I go outside and have a smoke and start hitting on other girls but that didn’t lead to anything. We leave the party and hold hands going back to my car to go back over to her place.

She makes me a grill cheese and we talk for a bit. I wanted to kiss her but couldn’t find the right moment and kept getting nervous thinking about it. Then she said she was going to bed and I said how about a good night kiss. I know I wasn’t thinking at the time and stupid crap kept coming out of my mouth. She denied that and said she wasn’t interested in seeing anyone and only wanted to be friends. I know of course this is crap and it only means I’m not interested in seeing you. I came back with telling her I wasn’t interested in dating anyone either. Then she goes on about if I wanted to kiss her that means I want to date her. I start being a jerk to her and stupid crap kept coming out of my mouth. It came to the point where she said you’re being really creepy right now I’m going to bed and locking my door if you keep this up.

I am aware I made some huge mistakes and I feel like an idiot after it all happened but I can’t deny my natural urges to want to bang this girl. I’m not going to pretend to be her plutonic friend. I think the biggest mistake I made was not trying to make out with her at the party before going back to her place and thinking about making the move too much was a bad idea and another one was asking for the goodnight kiss. What would you guys have done?

I have not talked to her since the party and I have to see her everyday of the week in class. Should I just play it off and act like nothing happened. I almost apologized to her that same night for my behavior towards her. For the most part I’m just really confused to why I got rejected. I’ve put in a lot of kino like this in the past and have always got at least a kiss by the end of the night.

Dude, not lying to u but the same thing happened to me with this girl at the beginning of this school year, and all i can tell u is that it is sooo over. lol..Im sorry to tell u that but it is. Just go outthere and look for other girls, it took me a while to conclude that it was over but u have to do it eventually. forget about her and move on if she comes back and starts talking to u its all good, but other than that its done..Find other girls man, thats what i did, and ever since i ****ed it up with that chick ive been with more girls that ive been with my whole life so u definitely learn from ur mistakes, just dont do the same thing again like begging for a kiss and then getting mad cause she rejected u..

 

[T-Mack]

Thanks for the replies guys. I will admit I was acting a bit desperate due to the fact I haven't got laid in a really long time and the lack of options I have at the moment. Begging for the kiss is what completely sunk the ship. I'll just have to work on improving myself and start meeting hotter girls.

 

[S.Y.L]

Yes, you asked for it. Bad idea

 

[bam bam]

dont cry fix it. no magic solution awaits you... everything from fame and glory all involve hard work... if you want woman in your life and we wont get into getting laid fix it dude... unless you have serious health issue which prevent you from doing anything the world is in your hands... what you do with it is up to you...

 

[Jitterbug]

You were already in the Friend Zone before heading to that party. You could've done better there but it wouldn't have made much difference.

As for kinoing, yeah it's important, but if the girl isn't warming up to you by returning it (i.e touching you back) then it's not getting you anywhere.

 

[DonJuan11]

Everything seemed smooth sailing until the drinking started at the party. We were touching each other heavily (hand holding and grinding) the majority of the time during the beginning of the party. We were even feeding each other food at the party. Then she starts getting a little crazy and starts giving a lap dance to another guy and grinding on other dudes. For some reason I let that piss me off.

The reason being she has emotional control over you.

Well I go outside and have a smoke and start hitting on other girls but that didn’t lead to anything. We leave the party and hold hands going back to my car to go back over to her place. She makes me a grill cheese and we talk for a bit. I wanted to kiss her but couldn’t find the right moment and kept getting nervous thinking about it. Then she said she was going to bed and I said how about a good night kiss.

Brutal asking for it. By asking for it she is definitely not feeling it with you.

I know I wasn’t thinking at the time and stupid crap kept coming out of my mouth. She denied that and said she wasn’t interested in seeing anyone and only wanted to be friends. I know of course this is crap and it only means I’m not interested in seeing you. I came back with telling her I wasn’t interested in dating anyone either. Then she goes on about if I wanted to kiss her that means I want to date her. I start being a jerk to her and stupid crap kept coming out of my mouth. It came to the point where she said you’re being really creepy right now I’m going to bed and locking my door if you keep this up.

Translation: "You won't kiss me? OK, then I am going to put you down so I can feel better about myself and kept my ego from getting deflated." That sounds very sexy.

I think the biggest mistake I made was not trying to make out with her at the party before going back to her place and thinking about making the move too much was a bad idea and another one was asking for the goodnight kiss.

That wasn't your mistake. Your mistake was not realizing what is working and what is not working with her. If she is grinding with another guy right in front of you, what does that say about her interest in you? She's grinds with another guy in front of you, so you reward her by holding hands and drive her home and then sit on her couch and talk? ("Wow, I grind with another guy in front T-Mack and he still gives love and attention? I wonder what he'll give me if I kiss another guy in front of him, perhaps a new car!")

As soon as I saw her grinding, I would have grabbed the hottest girl there and starting dancing with her. Then I would not have held hands to your car, or talked much on the way home.

I have not talked to her since the party and I have to see her everyday of the week in class. Should I just play it off and act like nothing happened. I almost apologized to her that same night for my behavior towards her. For the most part I’m just really confused to why I got rejected. I’ve put in a lot of kino like this in the past and have always got at least a kiss by the end of the night.

You got rejected because you didn't turn her on right. The best kino in North America won't get you anywhere unless you turn her on correctly.

Apologize right away, and then remain nice to her. Your chances with this girl are as good as me and Sharon Stone in 1992.

 

[Allurre]

Don't sweat it. Everyday will be your new day.
Ask her out again sometime and just start again.

It's that simple, don't over complicate things.

 

[T-Mack]

I apologized and she says sorry about sending out false signals. Basically jitterbug got it right. I was already friend-zoned before we went out. None of that kino meant crap because I never had a solid frame established with her beforehand. Well, I learn something new everyday. I’m not going to bother asking her out again. Thanks for the honest replies!

 

[More Cowbell Please]

I think you answered your own question. You have to be relaxed around the ladies. You had it right there and you let it get away, because she didn't see you having a rollicking frolicking good time, such of which leaves chicks' panties wet.

 

[TheRealSupreme]

I have a question about the statement below that nobody caught on too.

It came to the point where she said you’re being really creepy right now I’m going to bed and locking my door if you keep this up.

Is she a roommate also?

Now only if she is a roommate:

You expect her to be dumb enough to get involved with a roommate?? I guess you found out she may of been born at night but not last night huh. Now this is only if she is your roommate.

There are guys that stupid in the game to try to bone a innocent roommate. I feel for those girls with creepy guys getting crushes on them in a living situation and trying to hit on me by taking them out.

Maybe that is what she was trying to convey when she started lap dancing other guys was to get you off her so that it didn't compromise the situation.

I don't think your that big of a total dweeb idiot to get a crush on a roommate though so what did she mean by that?

Who's room was she staying in and why would she feel the gumption to lock a door?

I mean what total fool would ask out a girl in college that he is rooming with? Your a Don Juan you wouldn't do something that stupid and desperate.

Thank god women have brains also to not get involved. It would get ugly if one of the other decided to bring a date over.

 

[BeyondCharm]

Don't sweat it. Everyday will be your new day.
Ask her out again sometime and just start again.

It's that simple, don't over complicate things.

I think this is great advice. Also, go out and date other girls.

I've dated two girls back-to-back and one denied a kiss and the other didn't. Sometimes our own "mental" expectation of how we "think a date" is supposed to go gets in the way of callibrating and reading the vibe for what it really is. Sometimes our own ideal blocks us from realizing that the chemistry is just not there. However....

If a girl doesn't want to kiss you, it is HER ISSUE, not yours. You cannot make or force someone else to do something, and no matter what you say/do/act like, there's still no guarantees.

 

[MisterMcGee]

It's not about making or forcing a girl to do something, it's about getting past her defences.
Not in the OP's case, of course, but in most cases yes.

 

[T-Mack]

I am not rooming with her. I ended up crashing at her place that was down the street from the party because my house is about a 40 minute drive back and I diidn't want to drink and drive home. I left out a lot of details to the story. We both had a lot to drink that night. Before we left the party she already made the statement to everyone that T-mack is staying over at my place and sleeping on the couch.

I did dance with another girl at the party and I left out the part where I gave her a massage for a little bit back at her place. Another detail is that I was iniating just about all the kino, but she wasn't resisting it and didn't show any negative expressions that she didn't like to be touched. There was only one time I remember when she started it and that was when she started dancing and rubbing her booty on me when I had my back turned against her.

After apologizing I ended up sending another text saying I'm glad we could clear things up blah blah and asking her to be my wingman and to help me meet hot ladies. I didn't get a response from her after that and I'm sure it was because I added in the wingman part. I don't really care anymore and I already have a lunch date set up with another girl for tomorrow.

 

[slickaz]

was because I added in the wingman part. I don't really care anymore and I already have a lunch date set up with another girl for tomorrow.

Thats what the fvk im talkin about!!!!!!