Pua Openers Thread!!: Post Your Openers Here!!!

[Last Man Standing]

I use "Yo mama is so fat" openers...


Yo mama so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up

Yo mama so fat she eats Wheat Thicks.

Yo mama so fat we're inside her right now

Yo mama so fat people jog around her for exercise

Yo mama so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone

Yo mama so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors

Yo mamma so fat you have to roll over twice to get off her...

Yo mama so fat she was floating in the ocean and spain claimed her for then new world

Yo mama so fat when you get on top of her your ears pop!

Yo mama so fat when she has wants someone to shake her hand, she has to give directions!

Yo mama so fat she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"

Yo mama so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat, people said "Taxi!"

Yo mama so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized

Yo mama so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway

Yo mama so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller

Yo mama so fat she got to pull down her pants to get into her pockets

Yo mama so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave, she landed on 12th

Yo mama so fat when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too

Yo mama so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn"

Yo mama so fat when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE!

Yo mama so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please"

Yo mama so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.

Yo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it.

Yo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.

Yo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says we don't do livestock.

Yo mama so fat her neck looks like a pair of hot dogs!

Yo mama so fat she's got her own area code!

Yo mama so fat she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagon!

Yo mama so fat God couldn't light Earth until she moved!

Yo mama so fat NASA has to orbit a satellite around her!

Yo mama so fat whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in!

Yo mama so fat when she plays hopscotch, she goes New York, L.A., Chicago...

Yo mama so fat she's got Amtrak written on her leg.

Yo mama so fat I had to take a train and two buses just to get on her good side

Yo mama so fat she wakes up in sections!

Yo mama so fat when she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride HER!

Yo mama so fat she sat on a quarter and made george washington cry.

Yo mama so fat when she lies on the beach no one else gets sun!

Yo mama so fat when she bunje jumps she goes straight to hell!

Yo mama so fat when she jumps up in the air she gets stuck!!!

Yo mama so fat she's got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book!

Yo mama so fat that her senior pictures had to be arial views!

Yo mama so fat she's on both sides of the family!

Yo mama so fat everytime she walks in high heels, she strikes oil!

Yo mama so fat she fell and made the Grand Canyon!

Yo mama so fat she sat on the beach and Greenpeace threw her in!

Yo mama so fat even her clothes have stretch marks!

Yo mama so fat she has to use a VCR as a beeper!

Yo mama so fat she broke her leg, and gravy poured out!

Yo mama so fat when she rides in a hot air balloon, it looks like she's wearin tights!

Yo mama so fat she got hit by a parked car!

Yo mama so fat they have to grease the bath tub to get her out!

Yo mama so fat she has a run in her blue-jeans!

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

come on guys...when i said OPENERS i didnt mean..."Hi, How are you?" and stuff like that...even though it is an opener its boring and lame!! NO LAME ONES PLEASE. You guys can get more creative then that right??

This is what guys don't get, those cheesy canned lined make you look lame, at least that's what women say about guys who use pick up line. Besides, why try to impress a woman with a canned line that anyone can use instead of impressing her with your character?

 

[Grand Wizzard Alamar]

This is what guys don't get, those cheesy canned lined make you look lame, at least that's what women say about guys who use pick up line. Besides, why try to impress a woman with a canned line that anyone can use instead of impressing her with your character?

I agree. Instead of using something canned, unrelated to the random situation you might be in, open with something that relates to your surroundings.

Use your senses!

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I agree. Instead of using something canned, unrelated to the random situation you might be in, open with something that relates to your surroundings.

Use your senses!

Bingo!

But that means that a guy needs to take heed of your disclaimer, he would need to rely on his senses. I don't think that guy's who rely on canned lines are truly in the moment and are cognisant of their surroundings.

 

[Dongfu]

"Hi, can I join you?"

Asking permission to do what you should just do?

Next

 

[Dongfu]

Women know why we are approaching them and talking to them.

By using opinion openers and such, you are demonstrating low value because you are afraid of being rejected, and women know it.
So many guys use an indirect opener as a buffer as not to risk or bruise their fragile ego's.

Be a freakin' Man and tell her why you are approaching her.

Even if you fail, it's better to do so as a Man than as a scared little boy.

You have a ****, so be proud of it and be proud of being a Man and having desires. Don't hide your interest or your desires.

There is no downside to showing interest in a woman or showing your desire for her as long as it comes from a position of strength and confidence.

The "community" has emasculated men by brainwashing them into not showing interest and not showing their desires, which they will have to do at some point during the interaction anyways.

Then you have to deal with "ASD" and "LMR" and "LJBF" and "DHV" and all that other BS which you wouldn't have to if you were up front about your intent from minute one.

They know why we are approaching them and talking to them.

If you think you are "flying under the radar" with opinion openers, you are fooling yourself, not them.

Best advice in this thread so far.

 

[Eaglecreek]

Show me yours and I'll show you mine...

Works miracles, she might even start touching you (the hand coming to your face might have some force, but she did touch you, meaning she wants you!)

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Asking permission to do what you should just do?

Next

We could always do what you do and just sit down promptly followed by the woman getting up and leaving...

 

[LeComteDeMonteCristo]

"Hey, you're really attractive. You're going to be my new girlfriend now okay?" *put arm around her shoulder*

 

[Microphone Fiend]

Ones I've tested
If I blow the 3 second rule:

Hey.. I finally worked up the courage to come and talk to you

- It acknowledges the balking on my part in a playful, disarming method


After a loser C&B's talking to a girl and ejects:

*smiling* Hey....was that you're bf?

-The girl seems to reject the guy even more and try to show how she is too good for him, but good enough for you

I've tried others, but these two consistently give me at least a shot at the girl I approach most times



Ones I've heard or read about

-Who lies more

-Look, I can't stay here long because I have to be somewhere but....

- While wearing shades or an accessory, Ask her which is better, then take the shades off and ask her 'this' and then put them back on and ask 'this?'

- Project mayhem by TD. Use your surroundings to flirt with her physically. Hit her over the head with something playfully and smile. For example grab a newspaper or magazine in the checkout line and just tap her on the head with it and when she turns around like wtf, act like it wasnt you while u hide the paper or just look at her confident and smiling like a kid who got caught with his hand in the cookie jar


Ones I can think of/will field test soon
-What do girls prefer? Guys approaching them in clubs or in everyday life? Because my friend...


-Any of those questions on the forum that can be overanalyzed to death. My experience is that women love to prattle on or analyze social situations. Iqqi's thread about her gf stealing her prospect is a great example of something that can really jumpstart a firestorm conversation with the opposite sex.

- What do you think of FWB because my friend...


I think you have to quote your openers (place the person you talk about as 'your friend') so that you don't look like a player or someone who says this to everyone