Pretty cruddy situation I'm in.

[The_Dude]

Well, I'll start off by saying that I'm pretty much an AFC, at least I was until I came to this site, and I'm slowly improving. The thing is, I met the girl BEFORE acutally learning that I was an AFC. Anyways, even though I acted completely AFC until I came to this site, she kept me around. It was pretty much just her and I for a while (I developed oneitis for her before visiting this site, I'm afraid it's too late) steadily getting closer in our relationship. For about a month things were going great, until this past week. The whole time we were together, she had feelings for my best friend. I knew this, and I did not really care because based on her ACTIONS she cared a lot more for me. But this past week she has been ignoring me and acting completely different. Not talking to me or doing anything with me, hanging out with my best friend every day. I know the best thing to do would be to next her, but I've already got feelings for her that I can't just get rid of. The other crappy part is that by losing her, I'll basically lose my best friend too. Any ideas? Thanks for reading if you've read this far.

 

[Anomalous]

What do you want? A friend or girlfriend?

If you want a g/f blow your friend out by saying, "Hey you two look perfect together, you look like brother and sister. HEY, you know what, if you have kids they would turn out like (put your hands on the side of my face and make flipper motions and squeaky noises, pretending the kids will be retarded)

Thats from TD

 

[The_Dude]

Eh...any better ways to go about this? For some reason I don't think that will work very well.

 

[REJ-]

The "Hey you two look perfect together, you look like brother and sister" part seemed pretty clever, at least try that part out. The other half of it seems to make it too obvious that you're discouraging them from hooking up. That's just my thought on it, I might be wrong.

 

[The_Dude]

Well, dealing with the friend won't really do much. He's already pretty much chosen her over me, showing how great of a friend he is. The question is, what should I do to HER? After coming to this site I tested out being a jerk (not completely, just a flirty type of jerk) on her, and she didn't seem to like it. She said something like "you've been being mean lately, and I really don't like it". Anyways, I'm positive that she's the type of girl I should next, but I don't know, I already have mad oneitis for her. She's pretty much the best I've gotten in a while also, making me not want to just move on. She liked me a lot and we had some pretty intense feelings for eachother, are they lost? I just know she was the first I ever felt so crazy about, and I guess I possibly blew it by telling her how I felt (even though she told me EVERYTHING she felt, constantly). Is this relationship revivable, or should I just bite the bullet and try to forget about her?

 

[REJ-]

She said something like "you've been being mean lately, and I really don't like it"

If you've been an extreme AFC bowing down, and putting her on a high pedestal, then: "Is it because I don't bow down to your good looks like everyone else? I'm not forcing you to stay with me. Feel free to go out and find some ass-kissing chump to be with" or something along those lines.

 

[NeW2TheGame]

I think its a done deal...from what you posted...NEXT

 

[The_Dude]

"I think its a done deal...from what you posted...NEXT"

Haha, easier said than done. But you're right, she really should be nexted. I just need to work up the balls to do it and stop thinking about her.

 

[Ace of Flames]

Don't think of it as a loss. Think of it as a new opportunity! You can get rid of all this uncertainty and find a new girl! A better girl, too.

You're starting to learn lots of new things here, right? Isn't the thought of using all this new stuff exciting? I remember when I first got here, I was psyched to get out there and start changing my life for the better. Remember, there are plenty of girls out there. You'll get over this one soon enough, and bigger, better things will come along before you know it.

 

[CrazyAsianBiker]

Ok Dude, if you REALLY REALLY want this girl THAT bad.

Here's what you do.

Encourage their relationship. I DON'T KNOW WHY THIS WORKS SO WELL BUT IT DOES. Tell them they look good together and would make a good couple.

Be SMOOTH not Mean.

Do these things.

I call it the staring into the back of their skull trick.

When you talk to her, stare into her eyes like you're trying to look into their skull. Stare SO deep that you're literally lost in there, Focus on smooth small movements such as brushing her arm, brushing your arm against her midsection while grabbing something, ALWAYS stare into her eyes and make sure she looks away first. (Kino and DJ bible stuff, but i'm explaining it to you quick.)

Repeat these things. DO NOT PROFESS ANY LOVE FOR HER. OR ANY FEELINGS.

Just work on being smooth. Deep eye contact, lightly talk about male and female connections.

 

[TheLazy]

Ok Dude, if you REALLY REALLY want this girl THAT bad.

Here's what you do.

Encourage their relationship. I DON'T KNOW WHY THIS WORKS SO WELL BUT IT DOES. Tell them they look good together and would make a good couple.

No way that will work, especially if the girl does not have attraction towards him.

on a separate note, try to ruin your best friend's reputation in front of the girl when he isn't around, do things like telling her embarrasing/indecent/immoral things that your friend have (or have not) done before, but make sure you do it in an innocent manner, like you're just telling a good story or something, make sure you dont appear like you are putting your friend down on purpose.

you have to start making moves, but don't scare her with you suddenly confessing your undying love to her (unless you know she has feelings for you). Slow and steady with methods recommended by the bible and other members

The worst thing that can happen is for you to go down without even fighting.

Good luck!

 

[Bvbidd]

Why do the last two posts give polar opposite advice?

 

[The_Dude]

I'm pretty sure she still has feelings for me, just not as intense as they used to be. She's trying to make herself stop liking me, she's told me this. She also said that it's not working. I don't understand why a girl would want to stop liking you, but oh well. That's her loss. I've got better things to do.

 

[REJ-]

NEXT her. And make sure you don't seem like you're upset about it.

Something like "Listen, since we don't really seem to like each other, I don't think we should go out anymore"

If she goes out with your friend, she'll eventually realize that he's just another chump, which gives you another chance at her. If not, then it's her loss, and not yours.

You win either way.

 

[Rocko]

Encourage their relationship. I DON'T KNOW WHY THIS WORKS SO WELL BUT IT DOES. Tell them they look good together and would make a good couple.

Oh my God that is perfect, trust me on this, I performed this little trick unintentionally because i knew the outcome would be the opposite. I was talking to this girl at a party, being all ****y and ****, initiated some kino and negged her, then suddenly, the "birtday boy" (not his party but it was his birthday) came and started drawing attention away from me. All I had to say was "Come on HB8, give him a lap dance, its his birthday!! ONCE A YEAR!! come on, its for a good cause" (saying to the guy) "you are such a good guy, you are always such a nice guy"(was a bit drunk so I was just saying **** over and over, but basically I made the ****block look like he was a good guy, lowering the girls attraction toward him) sure that may have been AMOG of me, but it worked, ten minutes later she was trying to get my attention back.