possible to attract her again ?

[Thundernuts]

we promised each other to keep it exclusive i know its stupid exclusive dating and no relationship, and thats why I'm asking man, i know this sounds stupid but I've completely fallen for her and willing to do whatever to get her/keep her, i don't want to talk to other women and mess it up and honestly i only care about her.. it sucks lol

LOL you met this girl on tinder and you were honestly expecting her to be a high quality women rofl:crackup:

Okay. First and foremost let me say that I've been where you quite often and this behavior is very common in women you meet off of dating sites.

Things tend to get very intense very quickly and they end quickly.

I can almost garentee you 100% she has been talking with other guys and/or dating other guys. She told you she is telling everyone about you? Have you met any of these people, did they say she talks about you all the time.

You are over contacting her and she knows you are willing to do anything.

Women want a guy they have to chase, a guy they feel they have to fight for. Not what your doing.

Sorry man but your princess is in another castle try talking to women in the real world, tinder isn't good for anything more than pump and dumps. I don't know why everyone thinks they are gonna meet good girls off of a hookup app.

 

[Chaan]

It may be a good thing to understand why you want this woman so bad. You invested a major part of your emotions, effort and time on her the last few months. That is the only reason you are making yourself believe you really like her. Its like your mind is playing tricks with your feelings. Realize this and accept the fact that she is not your woman now and never will be. Besides that, you know you will find another girl one day right?

Deep down you know this woman is no good, which made you to needy, and you only want her so bad because she doesn't want you so bad.

Look in the mirror and tell yourself your a man and your the prize. **** the girl, 3 billion other girls left.

 

[hudpes]

Be sure to follow Mauser's and Tictac's advice, there isn't much to add to that.

Now, I've got to admit I'm a little confused over here... she doesn't yet want to be in a relationship with you, but she wants to date you exclusively, she made you promise you "won't talk to other people". But no relationship. Not yet. Because she just broke up with her ex 3 months ago.

Let me spell it out, again. Met you, no relationship, because she just broke up with ex, dating, exclusive. 3 months later, still no relationship. You see nothing wrong with that? You should be the one jumping ship, or are you getting what you want? You're getting crumbs off a huge loaf of bread and you're thanking her bowing down so deep your head is two feet under ground, so make friends with some gophers or pull your head out and make your back straight. If alpha wants a relationship and things don't move for weeks not months, alpha moves on. Beta keeps his promise of "not talking to other people", silently hopes and patiently waits until she grants him full access because this girl, this girl is really pretty and, what did you say again, "she's very pretty and gets a lot of guys attention". Well kudos for fvcking a pretty girl, with an attitude like that, you've been really lucky to land one! Do yourself a favor, stick around those forums while you're trying to hold back the barrage of texts you want to shoot her. Read the bible, read more threads, I'm not saying you'll get any wiser, but maybe, just maybe, it'll be enough for you to start wondering if you've had your eyes shut the whole time. Good luck.

 

[marmel75]

Dude you are clueless, not loyal.

1) its not your job to bring up relationship statuses. That's the womans job. Mistake #1

2) Texting nonstop. Mistake #2

3) Allowing her to string you along. Mistake #3

4) Being desperate. Mistake #4

What you need to do is start dating/banging other women. A woman doesn't want to be with you because she is your only option---she wants to be with you because you have other options and you choose her over them. You clearly have no other options and both of you know it. Not attractive at all.

Got news for you...you are the backup guy, or the backup to the backup...not her first option, and the way you are acting probably not her 2nd or 3rd at this point either. Man up bro...grab your sack if you got one and squeeze them a few times to try and get some testosterone in your system because you are in desperate need of it

 

[Anteros]

This guy is a joke or just trolling. I can't believe man are so shameless to post this stuff to other people online who want to improve and commit to having respectful relationships.

 

[callmej]

I'm not trolling I'm being serious, i stopped texting her nonstop and now we text every couple of hours, she's still cold, I guess I should move on, it's not gonna be easy though because I've really fallen for her.. What I don't understand though is why does she get jealous? If she wasn't interested she wouldn't get jealous I would imagine.. But i feel like Ive lost my common sense becsuse I've really fallen for her..

 

[Comatozed]

OP was painful to read. It reminded me so much of my last relationship.

You need to set the precedent early doors not to to text too much, because being too available and not enough of a challenge does two things. One, you end up getting invested in her. Two, she loses attraction. These two combined lead to heartache.

I hate to say it but I think it's a lost cause man. You need to go ghost, make her jealous and hope she starts to contact you. That way, you know she's interested.

Plus withdrawing attention gives you a far better shot than continuing to validate her. I was guilty of texting too much and wanting to keep the convos going, by doing this I went from being what she saw as a great guy to a clingy nuisance.

 

[Tictac]

i stopped texting her nonstop and now we text every couple of hours.

Seriously?

You think this is an improvement.

Why don't you just chase her away with a stick?

 

[djthiago1]

She just broke up, which means you're probably rebound, also NEVER suggest a relationship, your objective is to make her have fun and laugh, relationship statuses are women's job.

 

[callmej]

She just broke up, which means you're probably rebound, also NEVER suggest a relationship, your objective is to make her have fun and laugh, relationship statuses are women's job.

yeah I'm learning the hard way.. and thought i might be just rebound, but why would she go along with it for couple of months and still talk to me now (not flirty unfortunately) but if she didn't want anything to do with me wouldn't she just not say a thing?

and its odd but with my ex, me and her started dating a month and a half after she broke up with her ex and the relationship lasted 3.5 years, i was just hoping there was something i could do to make this girl I'm talking to like me again, she was perfect in my eyes before this coldness, I'm also afraid if i ignore her texts/snaps, she would just move on, or get with other guys which will hurt me for sure (she might be now, but idk for sure).

 

[way2smart]

I'm also afraid if i ignore her texts/snaps, she would just move on, or get with other guys which will hurt me for sure (she might be now, but idk for sure).

I will tell you this, the more you text her , the faster she will move on.
Don't contact her at all! Go completely ghost.
If she does initiate contact first, reply in several hours but in a way as if you don't care that she texted you. Or better yet, reply the next day. And that's it, never initiate contact and don't keep the convos long.

If you don't ignore her, she will move on 100%. If you do ignore, you have a 50% chance of retracting her.

And please for the sake of God, meet other girls and hangout with them, post pictures of you and chicks on Facebook or someplace where she will see.

And if she asks you who they are, just tell her that you are hanging out with new girls and mention that you are not in a relationship with her.

And I can assure you 100% she has been seeing other people. So please don't be a Beta, stop being committed to a girl who didn't commit to you

 

[sylvester the cat]

OP is addicted to pain. That's where all this beta chumpness starts from.



This is the first thing that needs to be addressed.

 

[callmej]

OP is addicted to pain. That's where all this beta chumpness starts from.



This is the first thing that needs to be addressed.

Whatever it is, it really sucks because it was going so good with this girl, she was almost perfect in my eyes, I wish it would workout somehow, ignoring her is gonna hurt me a lot(I know it's beta but I'm in a ****ty situation), it sucks how you can't tell a girl how much you like her and how much she means to you because it would make you a no challenge and will
Push her away...

 

[way2smart]

Whatever it is, it really sucks because it was going so good with this girl, she was almost perfect in my eyes, I wish it would workout somehow, ignoring her is gonna hurt me a lot(I know it's beta but I'm in a ****ty situation), it sucks how you can't tell a girl how much you like her and how much she means to you because it would make you a no challenge and will
Push her away...

How old are you? I really hope you are 15.
With a mindset like this, you will get dumped by every girl you will meet in future.
Read DJ bible. You need to improve your game.

Looks like you don't have any experience dating girls, at all.

Sorry for being harsh, but really I'm trying to help.

 

[callmej]

How old are you? I really hope you are 15.
With a mindset like this, you will get dumped by every girl you will meet in future.
Read DJ bible. You need to improve your game.

Looks like you don't have any experience dating girls, at all.

Sorry for being harsh, but really I'm trying to help.

I'm not offended, I need all the help I can get, but with other girls, I've always acted upon my instinct, I was just being myself really I don't really have a game, in the past all I did was tease and be smart ass with girls until they like me, then I would just be nice and sweet to them (I really am a nice person even to guys, I'm a big believer in karma), and that's it, but with this one everything was good and all of a sudden started getting colder and colder..

 

[Rival]

you guys getting trolled so hard.

 

[callmej]

you guys getting trolled so hard.

I wish I could deceive people easily like that, maybe I couldve deceived her into liking me lol, jk, but I am not trolling, I really need help

 

[Rival]

I wish I could deceive people easily like that, maybe I couldve deceived her into liking me lol, jk, but I am not trolling, I really need help

In the wild case your not, I'll say your chances with this one are all but over. Learn from it and move on, take the advice others have said her.

At least you got the Lay.

 

[Meisterman]

I don't think OP is trolling, sadly I too have been there myself. It's absolutely crazy completely true that the more you validate a girl and give her your attention, effort, and time she will become disinterested. It makes no sense at all but I've seen it from my own experience the more you try to invest in her the worse the outcome will be. As someone else mentioned then it's just a double whammy, because you invest so much into her, and when she turns cold on you you're done and dusted because all your energy is still invested in her and she's no longer around. It's sad but true the only way is to just go no contact and ignore her and move on. Time will heal the wounds and if she comes around great, and if she doesn't then you saved yourself a lot of wasted effort (Because trying to force a girl to like you will only push her away).

 

[callmej]

I don't think OP is trolling, sadly I too have been there myself. It's absolutely crazy completely true that the more you validate a girl and give her your attention, effort, and time she will become disinterested. It makes no sense at all but I've seen it from my own experience the more you try to invest in her the worse the outcome will be. As someone else mentioned then it's just a double whammy, because you invest so much into her, and when she turns cold on you you're done and dusted because all your energy is still invested in her and she's no longer around. It's sad but true the only way is to just go no contact and ignore her and move on. Time will heal the wounds and if she comes around great, and if she doesn't then you saved yourself a lot of wasted effort (Because trying to force a girl to like you will only push her away).

It really does suck, I have very strong feelings for her and she was very into me for months, I feel like I can't even think straight anymore. I wish there is something that I can do to have the same initial thing going and somehow keep her!