Point of no return

[DonEdwardo]

Hi Guys,

Today I bought a box of Condoms. Not something big I guess for most people, but I'm 26 and I today bought my first box of condoms. I have had a box before, a box my mom bought for me when I went to university.. as a joke, I think, but today I am not so sure.

See I have been living in a world that I don't think is normal. I have for years I guess been "ashamed" of my sexuallity. I can't remember being told that sex is bad, but for some reason I have always been ashamed of the sexual feelings I have towards women. It's as if I had gotten it into my head that it is somehow bad/wrong to be turned on by women. And so I think thats one of the reasons that I have never had any success with women, I have always been so scared that they find out that I am physically turned on by them. The problem is that it becomes worse, the more you try to deny your feelings the more it becomes forbidden fruit.

Soon it doesn't really matter what, but you can't help be turned on, go for coffee, you start to think about things that prehaps you shouln't be thinking of, the slightest touch and things start happening and your embarressed. So it just becomes worse you were created sexual and now you are trying to keep these emotions inside and in the end you can't.

So today I bought a box of condoms, it is the mature thing to do, I am no longer sure that I want to stay a virgin till marriage. I'm not sure, and so I would rather be safe then sorry. But the point is I'm not gonna be ashamed for who I am. I need to accept that I do get turned on by women and hope that they do not mind that fact.

I'm hoping that because of the fact that this is a place for more mature people to post, prehaps you guys will help me out. What is normal when it comes to being sexually aroused?

I often think of women that I have recently met and play out different situations in my mind about them, this will get me turned on. This I am pretty sure is normal, the next one though I don't know. Last time I went out with a women and you need to understand that I have never kissed or romanically embraced a women in my life before. Just the slightest percieved touch was almost enough to arrouse me! Something like leaning in and holding her hand lightly to check out and touch her watch. Something that I guess in my mind becomes sexual because I have never done that before, prehaps next time it will be better and less sexual for me? I am like a 12 year old boy when it comes to these things!

Do you DJ's think women will mind the fact that you are arroused by them?? Is it something I need to worry about or something that should just go away with experience. If I should worry, how should I go about getting rid of the problem, please don't say something like sleep with a prostitute.. I thought of maybe going for a full body massage to get used to the idea of being touched? For those who have been on one, is it "acceptable" to be arroused during the process? I would be terribly embarressed if it happened and I was not sure if it happened to other people?

Thanks for the help.
DonEdwardo

 

[Desdinova]

Just the slightest percieved touch was almost enough to arrouse me! Something like leaning in and holding her hand lightly to check out and touch her watch.

That's pretty normal when you're new to the world of dating. Used to happen to me when I started dating. Goes away after you've dated LOTS of women.

It's nothing to be ashamed of. In fact, women love knowing that they can easily turn you on.

I have to ask, did you have a strict religious upbringing?

 

[Slickster]

Don,

You are 26 and have ALOT of bottled up sexual tension I'm sure. You are perfectly normal. We all get turned on by women. Their touch, smell, just the sight of them. Its all good. Don't ever feel ashamed of it. You are a man and you are reacting naturally. What could be wrong with that? In fact not getting aroused would be unnatural and wrong. Which may be why you are having difficulties. Let it go man! Do not be ashamed of your sexuality. Have you read the DJ bible? I think Pook has written some great stuff on this idea.

And no women don't mind you getting turned on by them. THEY ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT!!! Why do you think they dress the way they do? Its why they wear make up. Its why they do most everything they do. Most all women completely thrive on male attention.

Don't be ashamed Don. Embrace it!

Once again check out the DJ Bible. There is a lot of great reading there that will help your mindset out in a big way.

Good luck.

 

[crowes22]

I need to accept that I do get turned on by women and hope that they do not mind that fact.--Don

Drop this attitude man, the part of 'hoping they don't mind'. Hell they are dying for you to be turned on.

The virgin thing, no biggie. Don't let that hinder you. For God sake don't let women know you are a virgin. At your age I doubt they'll be asking this, if it does come up.....LIE.

I suggest fvcking multiple women. Do not just bang one and be content. Screw variuos women. This way your eyes will be opened and you'll lose respect for them for sure.

 

[DonEdwardo]

Hi,

Thanks for the reply's so far guys,

Desdinova : Yes I do have a religious background, but I think that I more choose it as a means to hide my insecurities than something that was forced down upon me.

Regards,
Edwardo

 

[Desdinova]

I had a strict religious background where sex was FORBIDDEN until marriage. Even spending time with a woman was forbidden. The religion basically put the idea in my head that women were something to be avoided, even frightened of, for fear of displeasing god. This was one of the MAJOR hurdles I had to get over before I could persue dating a woman.

I was also taught to repress my sexual desires, such as avoiding masturbation. This gave me the belief that being sexually aroused was wrong, even something to be ashamed of. I was pulled out of sex education classes in school because it would get me to think of engaging in sexual activities. I was to learn from my parents and the books pumped out by the religion, both which taught me nothing.

I learned how sex worked by watching porno tapes that my cousin gave me when I was 15. The initial sight of the videos made me disgusted, but it let me know exactly how sex worked.

 

[Metalixia]

I had a bit of an awakening this year.

i'd always believed that sex was sacred, something that came after love, something that's pure, and innocent. Something that's so special, you'd only give it to the purest of people.

this illusion was shattered once i started mixing with older people at college, and going out drinking/clubbing (i'm 17, and underage).

I'm still adjusting.