POF Conversation

[phil2015]

Hi guys

Just a quick one, in regards to my recent experimenting with chatting to people on POF. In general, I am able to get replies, make conversation with women, even GA phone numbers etc etc.....My issue is, after a few days they just seem to grow bored or give up and do not talk any more.

Has anyone experienced this before?

It feels almost like they are only on there just to gain attention/validation from having a man want to chat to them etc. I even questioned if they were really interested to begin with, but if not why would they give their real number out etc

Your thoughts appreciated chaps

 

[Bingo-Player]

you either being too serious with your messages or your sending too many

i matched with a chick on tinder at the start of october, i sensed a good amount of interest coming from her........ but she lives almost 50 miles away and we quickly established that between both of our calendars a meet up in october was going to be virtually impossible

so what do i do ?

well to be honest i wasn't about to lose sleep over some random chick on tinder so we exchanged numbers and i just backed off

its now the 1st of november and i just hit her up earlier today to see if we could schedule a meet

she thinks next weekend should be good and i think theres lay potential there

the moral of the story is even though a left it almost a month this chicks interest was still at exactly the same level it was 4 weeks ago

texting her multiple times a day seven times a week wouldn't have allowed that

 

[sylvester the cat]

aim to arrange a meet up within the first few messages. that will separate the AWs from those serious about meeting up. you most definitely should not still be having conversations on pof that last days.

 

[LMFAO]

The whole point of talking to them is to arrange meeting them. Are you asking them out on a date? Get their number on Whatsapp (or the iMessage sh*te) within the first few messages on POF. Sent them a text with your name, talk to them a little bit on it and I mean for 5 minutes not several days and straight away tell them let's meet at this day and time.

If you're not asking them anywhere they probably think you're a retard.

But yes the women on this sh*te are flaky as f**k, due to the supply of c0ck available to them and probably many being emotional train wrecks. From my experience they look for any f*cking reason they can to disqualify you and then go ghost, even the average looking ones. They think they are on top of the world when in reality within a few years their value drops exponentially and not even a dog in the street would look at them then.

 

[phil2015]

Yeah I think that must be what Im doing wrong...

I put a bit of time into it this week and got about 6 numbers, talked too much I think.

They brought up their exes, emotional state, work, life etc and basically lots of rubbish I didn't care about.

The best response I ever got was about a month ago.....I was about 4 messages into chatting with a girl when she mentioned she liked the area where I lived. I invited her round to my house for a cup of tea that night, and to my absolute surprise she came around

 

[The411]

^^^If you really got 6 numbers within the span of one week, then I personally think that you have little to worry about. That's averaging almost one chick per day.

Why even ask for advice? How many more phone numbers would you expect to collect in one week?

I spend a lot of time, too, inviting chicks online to drink with me, and I don't get very many to say "yes." And I've been doing this for years.

If 6 women every week agreed to meet me for drinks, I'd likely be well on my way to sleeping with over 1,000 women by now.

Did I mention that I'm a book publisher? LOL

Skip the step of asking for the number and just invite them to drink with you first. If they're truly interested in meeting you, then they'll likely offer up their number without your ever even having to ask for it.

There's absolutely no point in my asking for a chick's phone number anymore--especially the ones I meet online. It's actually more of a HINDRANCE. Another hoop I'm expected to jump through before meeting her. So why bother?

Espi I see your point in not bothering to ask for a number, but I personally and a few others prefer to at least talk to the chick over the phone or at least have the number to have her text a picture of herself for our phones "picture caller ID". The reason for that is to make sure the chick hasn't become a whale and it's the actual chick not using a friends pic etc.

As for asking for the number I never asked. I told them (copy and pasted the following statement): Well it was nice talking to you (her first name). I'm not on the site much as I've been busy lately. Give me your number and I'll text you mine in a few. (My real first name) =)

They usually always left the number as their reply. If not or any other stall. I deleted their reply.

But then again I see it from your side where a chick whom you don't ask for her number and she then gives it to you shows a bit more interest in meeting, or if she just shows up at the place even more interest in a 'hit it and run'.

 

[Harry Wilmington]

Some advice:

1. Stop asking for their numbers - you don't want them, you want a DATE with her
2. If she gives you the number, don't call/text her until AFTER you've gone on a date with her. If you're sending the right kinds of messages on the site, you don't need to do extra work off the site.
3. Get her out on a date after 3 to 5 messages - any more than that and you're wasting your time AND her time, and her interest in you is going to dwindle.
4. Don't worry about being catfished by not having her send a current pic of herself - I get it, you don't want to waste money and time, but in reality you shouldn't be going someplace expensive on the first date anyway. Most of my first meet ups are at coffee shops and/or bookstores, with much success. If you're spending more than $5 to $10 on the initial meet up, stop it!
5. Set up all the date details with her online. The last thing you should say to her before meeting up is "Great, see you at x-place at x-time tomorrow - look forward to meeting you!" That's it - don't call to re-confirm, don't keep sending her messages, and don't call/text her.

Doing these 5 things should help improve your numbers. Good luck!

 

[goldengoose]

Don't take online dating too seriously when using it. I would say these women saved you from wasting your time on going out on a date when they really weren't that interested. Women give out their numbers a lot online so that doesn't really mean much until you get them out.

Some advice:

1. Stop asking for their numbers - you don't want them, you want a DATE with her
2. If she gives you the number, don't call/text her until AFTER you've gone on a date with her. If you're sending the right kinds of messages on the site, you don't need to do extra work off the site.
3. Get her out on a date after 3 to 5 messages - any more than that and you're wasting your time AND her time, and her interest in you is going to dwindle.
4. Don't worry about being catfished by not having her send a current pic of herself - I get it, you don't want to waste money and time, but in reality you shouldn't be going someplace expensive on the first date anyway. Most of my first meet ups are at coffee shops and/or bookstores, with much success. If you're spending more than $5 to $10 on the initial meet up, stop it!
5. Set up all the date details with her online. The last thing you should say to her before meeting up is "Great, see you at x-place at x-time tomorrow - look forward to meeting you!" That's it - don't call to re-confirm, don't keep sending her messages, and don't call/text her.

Doing these 5 things should help improve your numbers. Good luck!

I disagree with your advice Harry.

Always get numbers for contact purposes. These are women you never met in person before, they are dating and meeting other guys besides you that have more preference over you. Also, you have no idea who is behind the screen, it is really easy to get catfished or have a chick flake on the date. Without a number, you sit there like an idiot waiting for a date that might not show. Look at all the dudes who got flaked on here at SS with a last minute flake text. They would sit there waiting for a girl who has no intentions of coming.

The last time I was on POF I received 56 messages in 2 days. When I logged in 3 days later over half of those messages were either fake profiles or their profiles were deleted in mid conversation.

If I set up a date on the site and their profile was deleted, I would have no way to know if the date was still on. Neither would she when there is no number for contact.

A lot of women have been catfished before and will want to make sure you are legit first.

I want to speak with her FIRST just to see if she is worth going out with. Many times I've talked with girls who were boring and sounded like a complete idiot. I knew right then not to waste my time going out on a date with them. If you guys have time to waste on a sh1tty women then go for it!

Her interest in not going to dwindle when she finds you as a stand out guy. I've waited weeks to reply back to messages and the women did not lose any interest. Most of the men on those sites are ugly desperate AFC's who's messages end up getting deleted.