Please tell me how to play it with this girl..temporary long distance scenario!

[tomwesten27]

This is a temporary long distance scenario and just wanted to make sure I play it the best and right way possible, so if things don't work out, I played everything correctly. Please advise!

My really close female friend Jill who is out here on the west coast with me was talking to a good friend of hers Kelly from the east coast. Eventually Jill sent a photo of her and I together to Kelly (the east coast friend) and she responded with "who is that!? he is really hot!" long story short, I was introduced to Kelly over the phone and literally the past week we have been talking & texting almost everyday.

I am actually moving back to the east coast in a few months so its only a temporary long distant thing but this girl and I are really clicking. Neither of us are playing games (as far as I know) and we have been very honest and upfront to each other about our attraction for one another. (plus I have been hearing a lot of great things from my close friend Jill about her friend Kelly talking to her about me)

Basically I want to make sure I play my cards right with this one. She is a bit of a tom boy which I like, raised around all guys, so she is not an emotional girly girly. She is not a big flirty type of girl, but she is still really pretty and has her way of showing she really likes me.

I want to make sure I play everything right on my end, so if things don't work out I know I did everything I was suppose to do correctly.

She will text me through out her day saying little things here and there like "just got out of the gym I am so tired!" or send me photo with a caption like "swimming in the pool today!" I'll respond with a flirty remark, we will go back and forth with small talk etc. We have even facetimed and skyped a few times already.

2) She has been calling me every single night before bed. We have great conversations, we laugh, we joke. She also hits me up every single morning with a text saying "goodmorning" or w.e.

Overall how should I be playing it with this girl?

I normally ALWAYS apply certain rules when meeting a new girl but honestly I feel this is a rare scenario. I have been nothing but myself, and so far the things she writes to me and how she acts I can tell she is into me, but I don't want to blow it by being to much to soon.

I will be flying back east in 4 weeks for 14 days to visit. I will actually get to meet her face to face for the first time and I just wanted to get some guidance and advice on how I should be playing this up until then?

Guidance on this would be greatly appreciated!!! Thank You!

 

[Kailex]

I really, REALLY hope you aren't killing your attraction to this girl with all this over-exposure. It sounds like even without a physical relationship, she already dominates a chunk of your day. I get that it's temporary, but even before you go for 14 days... a lot could happen in a month's time.

I don't know why you dove in like this when you haven't even seen the girl face to face and don't know what the chemistry would be like.

My biggest piece of advice is guard yourself, you seem like you are letting your walls come down over a girl you haven't even met yet and that could be dangerous, specially in an LDR.

You are already talking about her like she is on a pedestal when this is something that could fizzle out pretty quick. Just be careful.

 

[Tictac]

Be a light touch, a whisper on her mind until you relocate.

You are in a holding action here.

Less is more.

 

[Skyline]

I agree with Tictac's philosophical lawyer type statement. And Kailex.

Its kind of ironic how you don't want to mess up with this girl, but the thing is you already have. And no this isn't a "rare" scenario. By talking to her everyday and not setting up dates, which isn't possible because distance, you're acting too available and not giving her a chase. On top of that, you've already declared your attraction for her. She has no mystery or chase, women enjoy these two things the most when it comes to dating. You must be one good looking dude because you really striked out in two major attractive qualities. You better fix this or she's gone. Like what Tictac said, less is more!

 

[tomwesten27]

Thanks guys. so pump the brakes big time? Slower response time, less on my end more her reaching out on her end correct?

Is it salvageable?

 

[Tictac]

Sure. Just take it easy. It'll be easier to keep interest level higher for longer.

 

[tomwesten27]

Sure. Just take it easy. It'll be easier to keep interest level higher for longer.

Alright cool thanks. I need guidance on something please. As an example of playing it cool. Since she is not a big texter, there are sometimes like tonight as an example I hit her up saying:

Me: hey what you up to

and she will not answer my text. a few hours go by and I know she now is at work, (manager of a bar) but then she will call me when she gets off and want to talk on the phone and she will be flirty etc etc.

Is it in my best interest to sometimes "play the game" and not answer? kind of do back what she does? Or are games not necessary, and just ease back how much I hit her up?

 

[Tictac]

I call those 'nothing texts'. There's no information and nothing to respond to.

Dial it back. Give her and you some room.

Enjoy the phone calls. Just don't burn out the relationship on the phone before you move east.

 

[tomwesten27]

I call those 'nothing texts'. There's no information and nothing to respond to.

Dial it back. Give her and you some room.

Enjoy the phone calls. Just don't burn out the relationship on the phone before you move east.

Thank you! I will do that.