Please Help Me!

[felix692]

(yes this is a repaet of ahwt i wrote b4 but i think i may have done it wrong cos no-one replied, plz any advice at all, even if u dont think it'll help very much!)
Hello, can someone out there please give me some advice?
Im 17 and from australia, im in my final yr of high school and im havnig some issues with a girl at school. Ive only really gotten to know her well this year, but we've become pretty good friends and lately ive started to pick up that maybe we could be more, through vibes and stuff. I think she might like me and a few of my friends, male & female have commented on this. So wheres the problem u may ask, well (here comes the twist!) one of my best friends (male) likes her. Well he hasnt said anything but its pretty obvious and widely accepted in my group of friends that he does. She knows this too but just wants to be friends and has actually said so, but not to him, they went to the formal (prom as u guys call it) together but this was made very clear that it was just as friends and it was organised by others, neither one asked the other to go. So clearly nothing is gonna happen between them and shes not the only girl he likes anyway. But i still feel bad about it and im confused as to my feelings for her. Sometimes i like her and sometimes i just wanna be friends, i know that sounds like a cop-out but its true! Shes a really nice girl and i dont wanna mess her around. Are you confused now? Not nearly as much as i am, lol. Any help would be greatly appreciated!

 

[Dapper Swindler]

You're first one was right.

I'm new here and have no authority, experience, or wisdom. But from what I know my advice to you would be to stop worrying about just one chick. You're only 17, and if she's giving you this much of a headache then you're probably not going to be with her forever anyway. So go meet new women or something. I notice that most of the threads here are not about petty relationship stuff like this. They are about being a man. So be a man and make a decision.

 

[felix692]

cheers man, i appreciate it

 

[Dirtheart]

It might sound really harsh, but you have to be selfish sometimes and if you and this girl stand a chance of happiness then go for it.

If he is/had been dating her then things may be a little more complicated, but you can't put restrictions on every girl you like! Besides, if he has a problem with you asking this girl out, then he is the one being selfish!

As for your confusion/hesitation, just forget about it and take the chance. You have to take chances before you know if things will work. Don't think too far ahead and just taking things casually, one date at a time.

Good luck.

 

[Wyldfire]

So talk to your friend and tell him that you think you might want to ask her out or something and make sure he isn't so hung up on her that it will ruin the friendship. If he is okay with it and you're SURE he is REALLY okay with you pursuing her, then go ahead and ask her out if you want to. The one thing you shouldn't do is ask her out or pursue anything behind his back, because it would be perceived as a betrayal. If he isn't okay with you pursuing her then forget about her until he is hung up on someone else or involved with someone else...then he won't care.

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

I would just go for it.

He's being a pansy by not asking this girl out... he's been tip-toeing around her for a longtime, and it's time somebody else shoved him out of the way.

He shouldn't be mad at you, because, deep down he should know that it isn't gonna happen between him and said girl.

You do need to be a bit selfish... but no one will hate you for it. You're too young to let something like this really ruin a friendship.

I grew up in a very small area, where everyone at my highschool knew everyone, literally. (400 students, or so), so dating a girl your friend was after, or dating a friend's ex was almost inevitable, at some point.

I say be the man, and go get what you want.

The Bad Ass Canadian

 

[Dukester]

dont let the fact that your friend likes her bother you. you are worrying about it too much. if you like her and she likes you, then go 4 it. i dont mean to leave your friend in the dust, but if he's not gonna make a move- you need to.

also, if you're having this much drama as a 17 yr old, i would just drop it. i used to have s*** like that happen to me,a nd i always let it get to me. now i dont, so dont let it

go for the girl, and show your friend you got the balls to do it, just dont be a d!ck to him

 

[felix692]

Thanks guys, much appreciated. Its not really a big deal or anything, our friendship (me and the other guy) could stand that easily, we're pretty good mates.
Cheers!