Playing your hand slowly

[Glassguy]

I am currently spinning a 3 woman rotation. All have LTR potential but at this point I would rather have options than exclusiveness.

One of the things that I have been doing much more as of recently is this:

I slow play my hand with women. Meaning that if I start messaging/talking to a new chick, I dont go for the kill right away. We have 2 types of approaches that we can use. 1.) Establish some type of communication and then invite them for drinks rather quickly 2.) Establish communication and show friendliness but hold your cards and NOT invite them out right away.

By playing it slower, I want to emphasis a few things:

1.) I have 3 current options. Getting laid isnt an issue. Having one of the 3 meet for drinks/fun isnt an issue. Therefore, I am not out prowling for sex because I am already getting it, and I show no thirst when messaging different women. I guarantee that comes across in the way that I text women in terms of not being over eager.
2.) I dont text or respond back quickly.........If there is a conversation going on I will respond back. But I also pick a point to temporarily exit the conversation and come back to it later. Sometimes a few hours, sometimes the next day. This is ultra important.
3.) After opening up the conversation and establishing communication I will keep it light and fun. Based on the last 2 women I have met for drinks, both of them told me that they were anxiously waiting on when I was going to invite them out. Lets remember that in order for a woman to really pursue you there has to be a connection to her emotions. Anxiety is a very easy and effective way to hit those emotions and why it is so important to not be predictable.

By several women's comments made when we did meet up, they didnt know if I was just being friendly and thus friend zoning them or if I was interested. I would say that on average I have been chatting with them through text/messenger (sparingly) on and off for about 3 days before inviting them out.

We all have certain things that we do that seem to benefit us in the dating world. I normally invite a chick out for a drink rather quickly into messaging her but I have to tell you, slow playing these women seems to be a huge advantage. When I finally do invite them for a drink it seems they are much more enthusiastic about committing to it.

It also separates yourself for the constant "Hey", "Whats up? Wanna hang out?" and "Hey beautiful" texts that attractive women are getting consistently from other dudes.

Happy Hunting

 

[Clamslammer]

There is a fine line to this as well. Too much texting you just become a gay friend to her. You have to find what works for you. I personally like being direct and more importantly being direct with them in person and ask them out. Most girls have never been asked out in person

 

[Georgepithyou]

Very good point, most guys go in for the kill way to soon when they meet girls off OLD. Sometimes you gotta build up a bit of rapport before hand.

 

[BadBoy89]

There is a fine line to this as well. Too much texting you just become a gay friend to her. You have to find what works for you. I personally like being direct and more importantly being direct with them in person and ask them out. Most girls have never been asked out in person

I would agree with this. Unless the girl is overseas or something and you want to establish a connection.

For me, if the girl is in my City, I’m asking out by the 2nd text and meeting up fast. The clothes better start coming off within 17 seconds too. The girl is NOT a virgin, and her stock Is crashing and burning by the second.

It’s more like: give me sex, or get pregnant, or get out of my face.

Yet a man has to do whatever works for him. The OP is having success doing what he is doing.

 

[darksprezzatura]

I am currently spinning a 3 woman rotation. All have LTR potential but at this point I would rather have options than exclusiveness.

One of the things that I have been doing much more as of recently is this:

I slow play my hand with women. Meaning that if I start messaging/talking to a new chick, I dont go for the kill right away. We have 2 types of approaches that we can use. 1.) Establish some type of communication and then invite them for drinks rather quickly 2.) Establish communication and show friendliness but hold your cards and NOT invite them out right away.

By playing it slower, I want to emphasis a few things:

1.) I have 3 current options. Getting laid isnt an issue. Having one of the 3 meet for drinks/fun isnt an issue. Therefore, I am not out prowling for sex because I am already getting it, and I show no thirst when messaging different women. I guarantee that comes across in the way that I text women in terms of not being over eager.
2.) I dont text or respond back quickly.........If there is a conversation going on I will respond back. But I also pick a point to temporarily exit the conversation and come back to it later. Sometimes a few hours, sometimes the next day. This is ultra important.
3.) After opening up the conversation and establishing communication I will keep it light and fun. Based on the last 2 women I have met for drinks, both of them told me that they were anxiously waiting on when I was going to invite them out. Lets remember that in order for a woman to really pursue you there has to be a connection to her emotions. Anxiety is a very easy and effective way to hit those emotions and why it is so important to not be predictable.

By several women's comments made when we did meet up, they didnt know if I was just being friendly and thus friend zoning them or if I was interested. I would say that on average I have been chatting with them through text/messenger (sparingly) on and off for about 3 days before inviting them out.

We all have certain things that we do that seem to benefit us in the dating world. I normally invite a chick out for a drink rather quickly into messaging her but I have to tell you, slow playing these women seems to be a huge advantage. When I finally do invite them for a drink it seems they are much more enthusiastic about committing to it.

It also separates yourself for the constant "Hey", "Whats up? Wanna hang out?" and "Hey beautiful" texts that attractive women are getting consistently from other dudes.

Happy Hunting

Great post. Mimics my life experiences as well.

I talked about sowing seeds everywhere and letting them ripen.

There's a time and place for instant kill, and slow game.

Calibrate accordingly.

 

[EyeOnThePrize]

Friend zoning women is great. Especially if you sense that they're into you. This qualifies them in a very important way. Do they get angry and lash out when they sense what you're doing? Do they ignore and disappear? Or are they polite and always available to hang out? Sending you random cute messages?

If they're always positive and available to hang out then they passed a big filter, it shows they are genuine in their attraction for you, they are there to give and make you happy, not selfishly take for themselves. It also shows they're patient and easy going.

Funny thing is this could grow into resentment if she doesn't stay honest with herself.

Women do this type of filtering too, but many times the man is lying to himself, thus the nice guys, cucks, and orbiters.

If you can always walk you're never one of those. And if you're a good man you'll dismiss any resentful behavior.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

I found 3-5 rotation all smashing is manageable. Afterwards, it starts getting sloppy as I source and start calling Amy and Amanda the same. Is it bad I have to remember which has the Homer Simpson mouth poon? I have trouble slow playing with a consistent rotation of different vjj. If anything, it is a acceleration of what Jlaix referred to beast mode. 3-5 regulars and still sourcing more through apps and pickup is great. Erosion is inevitable. Women want more sooner or later.

Tbh I have a predisposition to slow play game as a noon or when blue pill. I'm not going back. If anything, I can accelerate and pump the breaks.

One of the most important things I learned in game is pulling the way you would if a terrorist had showed up with a bomb strapped to his chest. I am talking about this level of urgency on the pull. Letting her know, "time to go." Taking her hand and leading her as if she's a small child. It really plays to her submission and calling for daddy later. If she had daddy issues, it is even more obnoxious.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

Friend zoning women is great. Especially if you sense that they're into you. This qualifies them in a very important way. Do they get angry and lash out when they sense what you're doing? Do they ignore and disappear? Or are they polite and always available to hang out? Sending you random cute messages?

If they're always positive and available to hang out then they passed a big filter, it shows they are genuine in their attraction for you, they are there to give and make you happy, not selfishly take for themselves. It also shows they're patient and easy going.

Funny thing is this could grow into resentment if she doesn't stay honest with herself.

Women do this type of filtering too, but many times the man is lying to himself, thus the nice guys, cucks, and orbiters.

If you can always walk you're never one of those. And if you're a good man you'll dismiss any resentful behavior.

Good post.

IMHO it aligns with the notion, men and women are not friends. The sexual desire is inevitable usually even if one sided. It doesn't end well for her. It's fun while it lasts. There's a level of femininity and submission women apply.

I found it helps to tell her no to sex more than once.

 

[Fiji]

I would agree with this. Unless the girl is overseas or something and you want to establish a connection.

For me, if the girl is in my City, I’m asking out by the 2nd text and meeting up fast. The clothes better start coming off within 17 seconds too. The girl is NOT a virgin, and her stock Is crashing and burning by the second.

It’s more like: give me sex, or get pregnant, or get out of my face.

Yet a man has to do whatever works for him. The OP is having success doing what he is doing.

Agreed. I read this like "you guys actually text girls?". Texting to me is simply an intermediary exchange solely for the purpose of getting in person. I try to avoid convo over text because one you should rather be doing anything else and two this is exactly what the girl wants(a nice lil text convo with you). Make them wait for in person, unless you have god tier text game it's pretty tough for interest not to go down proportionally to the amount of text convo past a certain threshold. OP seems to be doing a decent job though. I've seen guys kill it with text game however they are savages and getting dirty/sexual immediately

 

[Glassguy]

Too much texting you just become a gay friend to her

I dont text much. More just responding back to their texts once I open the conversation and it gets rolling

I talked about sowing seeds everywhere and letting them ripen.

There's a time and place for instant kill, and slow game.

Calibrate accordingly.

Absolutely.

The key to how I have been having success slow playing is this, and it WILL go against what a lot of people on this forum tell others to do:

1.) Slow playing IS mystery. I am just being friendly but I am also showing SLIGHT interest.
2.) I do not text back quickly nor often. Just enough for a woman to start wondering if or when I will text back. This leads to a lot of double texting done by the woman.
3.) Its an ability to show interest without over investing. It makes them invest more to see where its going to go. Face it....even with mutual interest someone will do more investing than the other. Slow playing leaves the woman in limbo as to whether or not you are sexually interested in her.
4.) Dont get me wrong, if a woman opens the door for sexual innuendos and sexual talk, I take advantage. But I do it in a way to again leave her in limbo.
5.) I would do all of these things when texting a woman anyways, but by slow playing it, I just dont invite her out on a date as quickly as I would any other time. You would be surprised at how a woman will have her hamster spinning and come out and say "Why dont we get together" or "When are you free to grab drinks"......which in her mind, makes her the pursuer.....and the investor. They will also ask a lot of questions when you slow play your hand with them. Are you single? Are you dating? Blah blah. It puts THEM into pursuit mode, and that is exactly where a woman is most vulnerable for sex.

Women are masters at this. They will get all excited through texting you, act 100% interested and as soon as you ask them out they will hit you with "oh I will have to check my schedule", "Oh sorry I am actually seeing someone", etc. Slow playing and putting them in pursuit takes all that bullshyte out of the equation. By slow playing, YOU are doing exactly what a lot of women do to a man when the man pursues the woman. And that alone drives them nuts!

Happy Hunting

 

[Lookatu]

I am currently spinning a 3 woman rotation.

We all have certain things that we do that seem to benefit us in the dating world. I normally invite a chick out for a drink rather quickly into messaging her but I have to tell you, slow playing these women seems to be a huge advantage. When I finally do invite them for a drink it seems they are much more enthusiastic about committing to it.

It also separates yourself for the constant "Hey", "Whats up? Wanna hang out?" and "Hey beautiful" texts that attractive women are getting consistently from other dudes.

I'm in the same situation and this has been my experience as well.

IMO even having just one consistent plate really makes you that much more outcome independent, look/act less thirsty or desperate by willing to slow your roll, exude more confidence, increase your IDGAF attitude, and even play the long game with new chicks.

This is something you can't do easily IMO if you don't have any plates to fall back on or have been single for a long time.

I wanna say a certain portion of these gals I've met probably suspected that I had other girls I was seeing on the regular, in which case they probably viewed it even more as a challenge to try to get me or win me over somehow.

It's almost like that saying: You have to have money to make money. But instead it's: You have to have a girl(s) to get girls. LOL

 

[Glassguy]

IMO even having just one consistent plate really makes you that much more outcome independent, look/act less thirsty or desperate by willing to slow your roll, exude more confidence, increase your IDGAF attitude, and even play the long game with new chicks.

This is something you can't do easily IMO if you don't have any plates to fall back on or have been single for a long time.

100% correct brother.

When guys realize this and lose the eagerness, thirst and over investment in women, they will watch women pursue them. And its great.

I love being able to decide which one I want to go out with or smash. Its glorious. So much better than the dudes on here having a breakdown because one chick flaked.

Cant fake it, have to make it. Gotta have an abundance mindset through actually having abundance.
I have a 2nd date tomorrow at a chicks house. For sure smash. Very cute and great tits. First date Friday night for drinks. First date Saturday night for drinks dinner and "fun".
All three slow plays. All three blowing me up letting me know they are looking forward to seeing me.

 

[Bible_Belt]

It's the contrast to the average thirsty desperate guy that makes it work. Most guys are like a little kid in the back seat of a car who won't stop asking, "are we there yet?"

 

[Glassguy]

It's the contrast to the average thirsty desperate guy that makes it work. Most guys are like a little kid in the back seat of a car who won't stop asking, "are we there yet?"

True. And sadly, most men 25+ act like little kids.