Plates vs love

[Juanto]

I am curious about this, I have currently 4 plates and for some time (years now) and I have feelings for all of them although not equally towards all of them, one stands out a little bit more compared to the others. However my question is, if you "love" a girl, however you define it, do you feel need to drop all your other plates/options just to be with that one girl, or dont you feel anything like this I just described?

I am curious to hear the opinions of the more experienced DJ´s here.

 

[RazorRambo24]

lol I can relate. I def got multiple options.. but I only claim 3 of them as plates.. I still see other girls though, even yesterday, I posted a pic in a thread of me chillin wit some chick who isn't even one of my main 3 lol. No one really paid extra attention to the pic either.. I felt like someone might have spotted/called me out on the tray with the rolled dollar bill in it .. (Not me, I dont do hard drugs anymore.. but she was indulging). I was jus sipping on cognac and wine.)

But, to answer your question man-- I feel the same way often. I mentioned it in a thread I made short while back. I like one of my plates alot more than my other ones.. she's someone I known for 3 years and been seeing for 2 years.. First year I knew her we were both busy with life. I've literally thought about cutting off my other plates, yeah.. but, I also really enjoy the dynamic I have now.. I thik having sexual abundance just makes it hard to really commit--but I feel motivated by a fear.. that fear being that I'll end up losing her from not committing.. if that makes sense.

The fear mostly stems from losing alot of diff women in the past. Its only been in the past 3 years I've been able to keep women in my life for this long of a duration with NSA

 

[BackInTheGame78]

What is love...baby don't hurt me...don't hurt me...don't hurt me...no more...

 

[Stanley]

What is love...baby don't hurt me...don't hurt me...don't hurt me...no more...

Right Answer!

 

[EyeBRollin]

if you "love" a girl, however you define it, do you feel need to drop all your other plates/options just to be with that one girl, or dont you feel anything like this I just described?

No, not willingly. A woman has to demand the exclusivity. Don’t just give it to her because “feelings.”

 

[Krueg]

If you really like a girl and are looking to settle down... Then yes, persue one over the other.

 

[SW15]

The Only 9 Options for Men as They Age - Alpha Male 2.0

-By Caleb Jones As I’ve discussed before, most men, even Alpha Males, have no intention on being players for the rest of their lives. At some point, even the horniest players will want to “settle down” in some form or fashion. Today I’m going to...

alphamale20.com

This article will be insightful.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

So this is what they mean by Platonic Love.

 

[Juanto]

The Only 9 Options for Men as They Age - Alpha Male 2.0

-By Caleb Jones As I’ve discussed before, most men, even Alpha Males, have no intention on being players for the rest of their lives. At some point, even the horniest players will want to “settle down” in some form or fashion. Today I’m going to...

alphamale20.com

This article will be insightful.

Kind of doing option 7 right now

 

[RangerMIke]

Never catch feelings with a woman until she is nuts for you. You are a man, you can control your emotions. Emotional self-control... emotional self-control, emotional self-control.

The way you do this is that you NEVER think of a chick unless she is right in front of you. Seriously, make dates, then forget about her. On the date... be present, after the date... forget about her. If you start thinking of her, change the subject in your mind, get busy with other things.

 

[darksprezzatura]

Never catch feelings with a woman until she is nuts for you. You are a man, you can control your emotions. Emotional self-control... emotional self-control, emotional self-control.

The way you do this is that you NEVER think of a chick unless she is right in front of you. Seriously, make dates, then forget about her. On the date... be present, after the date... forget about her. If you start thinking of her, change the subject in your mind, get busy with other things.

Spot on

 

[AureliusMaximus]

What is love...baby don't hurt me...don't hurt me...don't hurt me...no more...

Although that kind of thinking absolutely stems from fear.

 

[AureliusMaximus]

Never catch feelings with a woman until she is nuts for you. You are a man, you can control your emotions. Emotional self-control... emotional self-control, emotional self-control.

Damn right.

 

[Gamisch]

I am curious about this, I have currently 4 plates and for some time (years now) and I have feelings for all of them although not equally towards all of them, one stands out a little bit more compared to the others. However my question is, if you "love" a girl, however you define it, do you feel need to drop all your other plates/options just to be with that one girl, or dont you feel anything like this I just described?

I am curious to hear the opinions of the more experienced DJ´s here.

Dropping plates for one woman is the biggest mistake you can make. Lets not underestimate the power you hold over that 1 woman by seeing 3 others. Once you focus on 1, the dynamic might change drastically...

Dropping them is an investment. You invest in 1 woman by dropping 3. And the biggest frustration occurs when you want a return of investments. Think of the gambling addict who tries one more spin to win his momey back. I did this several times. Because i refused to take the L, I tried to maintain sh1tty relationships much longer than necessary . One day you'll be screaming in her face ;" do you know how many GOOD options I dropped to be with you???"

My new policy is to invest (energy and time) in the woman that appreciates me the most today. I Don't care about yesterday.

One could argue that it's unethical or whatever. Idgaf. I am looking out for my best interest, not hers. In today's environment it's kinda beta to voluntary opt for oneites while you have options.

So ,be carefull. Dropping the others for one might backfire. You won't be the first man to experience this, and definitely not the last.

 

[Juanto]

Dropping plates for one woman is the biggest mistake you can make. Lets not underestimate the power you hold over that 1 woman by seeing 3 others. Once you focus on 1, the dynamic might change drastically...

Dropping them is an investment. You invest in 1 woman by dropping 3. And the biggest frustration occurs when you want a return of investments. Think of the gambling addict who tries one more spin to win his momey back. I did this several times. Because i refused to take the L, I tried to maintain sh1tty relationships much longer than necessary . One day you'll be screaming in her face ;" do you know how many GOOD options I dropped to be with you???"

My new policy is to invest (energy and time) in the woman that appreciates me the most today. I Don't care about yesterday.

One could argue that it's unethical or whatever. Idgaf. I am looking out for my best interest, not hers. In today's environment it's kinda beta to voluntary opt for oneites while you have options.

So ,be carefull. Dropping the others for one might backfire. You won't be the first man to experience this, and definitely not the last.

i really agree with you, but i wanted to swap notes with experienced guys like you to get other insights into this. Only thing I am doing which is not morally correct (yes I know…) is that I don’t openly tell the girls I’m seeing other women as well.

 

[Dr.Suave]

My new policy is to invest (energy and time) in the woman that appreciates me the most today. I Don't care about yesterday.

Interesting. How do you measure which one appreciates you the most? Is it the one who puts out the most?

 

[HaleyBaron]

I am curious about this, I have currently 4 plates and for some time (years now) and I have feelings for all of them although not equally towards all of them, one stands out a little bit more compared to the others. However my question is, if you "love" a girl, however you define it, do you feel need to drop all your other plates/options just to be with that one girl, or dont you feel anything like this I just described?

I am curious to hear the opinions of the more experienced DJ´s here.

You love because you're a man. Men get attached to many people. And because we're logical and not moved by our emotions, we know how to control them and keep them docile. For if we get too emotional, we can end up endangering our tribe and friends around us. Imagine if a shooting happens. If I'm "in love", I become emotional and panic like a woman does. But as a man, I'm suppose to keep calm and that requires being in control of that.

So what you are experiencing is normal. Here is another thing: most men are unable to endure loving multiple people. So they settle with one girl. I believe this is society to blame for weeding this out of men. We are suppose to have multiple friends and multiple mates, just like we did back in our tribe days and just like it has been throughout most of history. Alexander the Great had multiple women. He likely had one he loved the most yet he still ****ed other women.

So the answer is: keep them all if you have the strength to do so. If you feel like you do not, then choose one or two. But do not feel like it is wrong to have a heart for all those women. The only advice I give is that to not let your feelings get the best of you. A leader can love many people. A follower does not have the strength to broaden their emotional connection and control it at the same time. This is what defines great men throughout history.

 

[HaleyBaron]

Only thing I am doing which is not morally correct

Moral by whose terms? Women see it "morally incorrect." By men terms, you're being moral. Don't feel guilty. Be wary of women's reaction but do not give it much value past that. Weather the storm of "moral incorrectness."

 

[Juanto]

Moral by whose terms? Women see it "morally incorrect." By men terms, you're being moral. Don't feel guilty. Be wary of women's reaction but do not give it much value past that. Weather the storm of "moral incorrectness."

Some men will disagree with you, but I get your point, yes. It´s tricky, as this "arrangement" I have now really does make me feel happier compared to the traditional one GF model, but at the same time, sometimes I do feel "guilty" as explained before.

You made good points though.

 

[BadBoy89]

if you "love" a girl, however you define it, do you feel need to drop all your other plates/options just to be with that one girl, or dont you feel anything like this I just described?

You have 4 plates and think like this? Hmm.

Suppose you drop all the plates because you “love” that one girl. Then that “one” girl leaves you. Now you are left with 0 plates and 0 girls.

NEVER stop spinning. I mean never. When I had a live in girlfriend, I still made dates with other girls. If I get married and have a kid, I will still go on lunch or dinner dates with younger women. Always have to keep hustling,