Physical Contact

[razorbum]

Sup DJs

I just want to ask more about initiating physical contact. You would who I’m referring to if you’ve read my friendzone thread. Anyway, this girl is definitely interested in me and she’s great, so I wanna going into this with possible LTR in mind.

I’m meeting her later and I want to start putting moves on her. Now this is a girl who doesn’t like physical contact with anyone in general (this is verified by her friends) except with people she likes.

Under a context as such, how can I initiate physical contact and have her feel comfortable/at ease with me for the rest of the night.

Usually what I do is the arm first, and then slowly into shoulders/waist, and finally maybe the hands if its well and swell.

Tips guys?

 

[Night-hawk]

so I wanna going into this with possible LTR in mind.

Dude, you are pre-persuading yourself to have a relationship with this girl before you even touched her? You are already laying down the blueprints and breaking the ground for her pedestal building to begin construction.

Now this is a girl who doesn’t like physical contact with anyone in general (this is verified by her friends) except with people she likes.

She doesn't like physical contact? Come on man, you can't be that naive. Don't be so quick to buy other people's opinions..let me guess, a bunch of young guy friends said this? haha.

Granted, a girl who doesn't like physcial contact with other guys is good, if the physical contact she does like, is with you.
However you must know what constitutes appropriate physical contact and this comes down to your boundaries. Her liking high fives from guys is not the same as liking sensual acts of touching...get it? So, you need to set the sexual frame and watch for how she responds to your touching...start playful, then make it a little more sensual with her whiel doing so be aware of how she responds to you.

 

[razorbum]

LTR is something we both have in mind (for some reason we did communicate this). We've gone out a couple of times and I played it safe.

As for physical contact, that was her close female friends. I don't think I'm being naive.

 

[Night-hawk]

So what's the problem? Just kiss her, if you know she wants you and wants that why even mention how she doesn't like physical contact? You are playing it safe and that was what I was refering to. Why are you? You already afraid to take a risk and lose her? That's what I meant.

 

[razorbum]

Heh thanks man nighthawk. I just wanna know how to set the tone right to ease her into it, since it seems a little tricky here

 

[razorbum]

So what's the problem? Just kiss her, if you know she wants you and wants that why even mention how she doesn't like physical contact? You are playing it safe and that was what I was refering to. Why are you? You already afraid to take a risk and lose her? That's what I meant.

Well pardon me I'm still learning here too. Gotta think a little less about whether what I do will set her running and focus more on building it properly. Thanks for the advice though

 

[Night-hawk]

Fair enough. That's good you're here learning.

OK, for one your focus is going to be that what you do will keep her coming...back...for more.
As for easing into the physical... Play it cool. Provide yourself avenues for touching her, such as telling her a story while using gestures and bringing her into it. You can do playful things like twirl her around. You must go in with the attitude like I said above because it sends a different message to your unconscious.

"I must do it right" tells your unconscious "I need to be overly careful" "I don't want to make the wrong move" "She might think this, not like that" and it will inhibit you and cause you to over analyze compared to

"Everything I do I know she wants me and will keep coming back" will change your focus and you will feel more inclined to DO
without worry.

Whatever you AFFIRM to yourself you will CONFIRM to yourself.

 

[razorbum]

Thanks man. I figured I should be doing that too. I’ll play my cards and update on how it goes tonight!

 

[razorbum]

Just from update from the other night.

I think I came on strong (reached out for her hand at some point in the night) and now she tells me I'm just a friend to her.

I was doing alright at first, like just having small amount of physical contact with her back, her shoulders, but I guess inexperienced me jumped in too strong and it backfired when I took her hand.

Guess I'll use this as an experiment to see if I'm capable of getting out of that friends-only zone.

 

[Chamber36]

I knew this was going to happen.

Some girls just don't want you to touch them, and they might even hang out with you and amuse you, yet other girls won't say a thing, yet they want you to touch them.

You gotta use your senses, animalistically.

 

[WorkingDJ]

Touching a woman shouldn't be a planned mission. All should come naturally and in the flow of things.

 

[razorbum]

Guess I gotta let me flow more naturally. Maybe planning for it made me overwork on it too much.

I just wanted to be prepared though.

 

[youngmack]

You should have slapped her arm with your penis

 

[WorkingDJ]

Guess I gotta let me flow more naturally. Maybe planning for it made me overwork on it too much.

I just wanted to be prepared though.

Don't worry, I still have trouble with allowing it to flow as well. If I genuine accidentally touch her, I don't say sorry or anything for it, I just keep going with what we are doing.


And a thing I always remember is: Open hand, not closed. Just think about that..

 

[OC Speedball]

Touching a woman shouldn't be a planned mission. All should come naturally and in the flow of things.

This. This. This.

I have one girl that is an extreme feminist that will not give any kino back to me...but I continue to touch her, slap her ass, and pick her up; and she laughs every time. She is a weird one for sure, but I'm using her as an example because you should touch girls WHENEVER YOU FEEL LIKE IT. Start with a quick touch on the arm, then the leg, and then from there do whatever you want. I've never had a girl get offended from kino, they love it.