A1SteakSauce
Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 26, 2003
- Messages
- 106
- Reaction score
- 0
- Age
- 50
This is not really about DJ'ing but about the downside of DJ'ing if you don't carefully qualify what you catch . . .
So I have a client who is 65. Or let us say, "had." She looks like a turd. Wrinkles and nasty ****. I saw a picture of her when she was 25 and she was super hot. That explains why she is such a mega ****ing man eating ***** since AFC's have been licking her boots so many years.
Now of course she is the CEO of her company b/c she is corrupt and selfish as ****, spends the money on herself, treats her employees like slaves, spends half her time on her cat's appointments, etc. and she's been trying to screw over my deal with her company for the last year and a half. The reason is actually she wants to **** me and since she can't she wants to **** me over. She has a BF in her company who goes with her everywhere, he is like 25, he is required to kiss her cheeks at board meetings so she can make fun of him at dinner later, and he is the laughingstock of all the women there, poor ****er, but he makes super bucks. He is also jealous of me b/c she wants me not him (which she makes obvious, it makes me shudder, but it works on him like he's a woman) and at an xmas party one time where she wore a catskin leotard (ugh) he says to my back, "You're going down." To which I replied to his co-worker within earshot, "At least I'm not going down on a 60 year old woman." Later on, a year later, maybe, I walked into a room where the two of them are working, I rarely go in to visit them, he walks out of the room trying to look casual, swings around the corner and smacks into the (closed) door and falls flat on his back. Then mega-wench goes "We were up *very* late last night." I bet you were.
So now comes the good part. The old turd has run the business so badly since she was hired 6 yrs ago that her Board is starting to ask questions about her contract (b/c customers complain so loudly they have to). So she put them on my case, saying we've been the problem. She's already fired all the other contractors so we're the last ones to blame. So now the Board Director President calls me up, which she should have realized they would do, and what do I say? Well, after showing them how we were not the problem, in fact she misrepresented the costs and the services provided, I also mention that a younger CEO might better connect with their customer base. And, oh yeah, she owned stock in that startup where they invested the company's funds (about a million) which were subsequently lost, and as far as I know, that is against the bylaws, and jeapordizes their tax status for the past three years minimum (can you say payup to the IRS, ****head? how about "shareholder lawsuit" or is that one to long?). Oops, did I let that factoid slip, my bad. She was stupid to ever pull me into it, I'm the last guy left to get her back, I got her deals when nobody would piss on her old ****ing boots, and she still walked me off the plank. *****. She ****ed my deal, in the end, of course, but I ****ed her back, and in the ass to boot. Hopefully they'll spend her pension on attorneys to wriggle out of the IRS problem.
So what is the moral of this fetid story, besides that business is full of back-stabbing bastard mother****ers and ****ty old turd ladyies who'd **** over their grandson to save their stock options and expense account trips to Milan with their salaried BF's? It is of course that that beautiful HB ***** you want to lay down with today will turn into an ugly ogre tommorrow and before you know it so don't just look at the face, look at her actions. Beauty fades, but rottonness grows. Don't marry a beast with beautiful breasts that will sag, and high cheekbones that will become low hanging jowls, just find someone nice, for crying out loud.
And for the HB's hanging around, you can jerk the guys around all day and night today, laugh at the geeks, and blow off the nice guys, but you are just gonna get played by the jerks and the DJ's, and then when you get old and ugly, too, AND YOU WILL, then NOBODY is gonna give a **** when you die or go to your funeral, unless you're paying them. Which, if you just ****ed with my deal, you are gonna be too broke to do.
Oh, and the other moral is, women do not know **** about running a business. Watch HP and Martha Stewart tank, I promise you that. Geeks like me, on the other hand, will make everyone pay hard. Witness, Bill, Larry, and friends, and then bend over and grease up. But who am I kidding, I am fukked for now. At least I'll see the wrinkly one in hell, eh?
A1
So I have a client who is 65. Or let us say, "had." She looks like a turd. Wrinkles and nasty ****. I saw a picture of her when she was 25 and she was super hot. That explains why she is such a mega ****ing man eating ***** since AFC's have been licking her boots so many years.
Now of course she is the CEO of her company b/c she is corrupt and selfish as ****, spends the money on herself, treats her employees like slaves, spends half her time on her cat's appointments, etc. and she's been trying to screw over my deal with her company for the last year and a half. The reason is actually she wants to **** me and since she can't she wants to **** me over. She has a BF in her company who goes with her everywhere, he is like 25, he is required to kiss her cheeks at board meetings so she can make fun of him at dinner later, and he is the laughingstock of all the women there, poor ****er, but he makes super bucks. He is also jealous of me b/c she wants me not him (which she makes obvious, it makes me shudder, but it works on him like he's a woman) and at an xmas party one time where she wore a catskin leotard (ugh) he says to my back, "You're going down." To which I replied to his co-worker within earshot, "At least I'm not going down on a 60 year old woman." Later on, a year later, maybe, I walked into a room where the two of them are working, I rarely go in to visit them, he walks out of the room trying to look casual, swings around the corner and smacks into the (closed) door and falls flat on his back. Then mega-wench goes "We were up *very* late last night." I bet you were.
So now comes the good part. The old turd has run the business so badly since she was hired 6 yrs ago that her Board is starting to ask questions about her contract (b/c customers complain so loudly they have to). So she put them on my case, saying we've been the problem. She's already fired all the other contractors so we're the last ones to blame. So now the Board Director President calls me up, which she should have realized they would do, and what do I say? Well, after showing them how we were not the problem, in fact she misrepresented the costs and the services provided, I also mention that a younger CEO might better connect with their customer base. And, oh yeah, she owned stock in that startup where they invested the company's funds (about a million) which were subsequently lost, and as far as I know, that is against the bylaws, and jeapordizes their tax status for the past three years minimum (can you say payup to the IRS, ****head? how about "shareholder lawsuit" or is that one to long?). Oops, did I let that factoid slip, my bad. She was stupid to ever pull me into it, I'm the last guy left to get her back, I got her deals when nobody would piss on her old ****ing boots, and she still walked me off the plank. *****. She ****ed my deal, in the end, of course, but I ****ed her back, and in the ass to boot. Hopefully they'll spend her pension on attorneys to wriggle out of the IRS problem.
So what is the moral of this fetid story, besides that business is full of back-stabbing bastard mother****ers and ****ty old turd ladyies who'd **** over their grandson to save their stock options and expense account trips to Milan with their salaried BF's? It is of course that that beautiful HB ***** you want to lay down with today will turn into an ugly ogre tommorrow and before you know it so don't just look at the face, look at her actions. Beauty fades, but rottonness grows. Don't marry a beast with beautiful breasts that will sag, and high cheekbones that will become low hanging jowls, just find someone nice, for crying out loud.
And for the HB's hanging around, you can jerk the guys around all day and night today, laugh at the geeks, and blow off the nice guys, but you are just gonna get played by the jerks and the DJ's, and then when you get old and ugly, too, AND YOU WILL, then NOBODY is gonna give a **** when you die or go to your funeral, unless you're paying them. Which, if you just ****ed with my deal, you are gonna be too broke to do.
Oh, and the other moral is, women do not know **** about running a business. Watch HP and Martha Stewart tank, I promise you that. Geeks like me, on the other hand, will make everyone pay hard. Witness, Bill, Larry, and friends, and then bend over and grease up. But who am I kidding, I am fukked for now. At least I'll see the wrinkly one in hell, eh?
A1
