Personalize Your DJing!

es_mer8

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I get the feeling that some people are nothing more than DJ robots. Well, these DJ robots really don't deserve to be called DJs because I feel that a lot of people are missing the focus of being a DJ. What is being a DJ anyway?

"Getting the women we always wanted!"
"Being more confident in life!"

Hmm...decent answers. People always mention improving yourself however it seems very few actually participate. I am one of the few. It took a long time and I still have a ways to go. I personally wanted to lose 50 pounds in 3 months. Seemed possible, right? Wrong. Without resorting to anorexia, I've only managed to drop only 20 lbs. Enough to see a difference but not really enough considering how I still have a lot of stretch marks and my love handles are big enough to be loved by all.

Enough about me. Even with that I still struggle with true confidence issues. The truth is, I think confidence and ****iness are often too confused. Yes, the way I see it is that ****iness is taking it too far. Its like love. It starts as fondness, likeness, love, then goes to freakish heights like obsession. Obsession and love are two different states of mind, right?

C+F as a whole is worthless.

"C+F is like the blood in the DJ's veins!"

What are the odds that you can get these girls/women on your own minus the BS C+F? Believe me, no girl actually believes most C+F. However since you are talking to her without seemingly acting scared, you probably had more than enough interest.

"What do you recommend as an alternative"

Lets do some role playing. I am the old desert shaman. You are the bright yet ragged nomad. My quest: to discover what really works with opening conversations with women. Throughout the years, DJing has relied on all too many crutches (they are) to get women. This ranges from the damn-near-always fail neghits to the BS c+f to the "wonders" of fast seduction.

Initially I disagreed with what MOTU said on his new findings. Yet more and more I see what he is doing. At first I thought "He is reverting back to AFCdom!" when this is almost the opposite.

"You're getting so far off track"

No, I'm not. What he did was implement true confidence. Not arrogance, not ****iness, not this pseudo confidence that is just really one massive insecurity. What he did I notice is that he didn't think women were below him; he thought that women were at the same level.

Another problem with this BS confidence is that people rely on the right things to say or do as opposed to just going naturally.

"Now we are getting somewhere"

After seeing many mirages of c+f, neghits, and the fast seduction, we arrive at the brilliant lake of crisp, clean water known as DJing. We both take a drink. We realize that after travelling so long with such minimal success, we finally find the water.

"Enough of the worthless metaphors, what does this mean?"

Yes, it seems like the journey of the shaman is a long and complicated one but sometimes the best messages in life need a lot of uncovering such as the tombs of the pharaohs in Egypt. The key here is to personalize your DJ skills, not become a slave to the "DJ Code" it seems.

"But people said that these are vital to getting girls!"

Bull. What you really need is true confidence. Not a crutch or reliance on a few worthless phrases, but just to approach the woman, bust her balls whenever its there (whenever its there, not when you want it to happen), and ask her out. Of course, if you find success with taking a while to get to know her to weed them out, then go for it.

To end, I have a story of a friend. He managed to go against everything in the DJ Code with an HB 9 and have been together for nearly 3 years in one of the most strongest relationships out there.

He met her when he was in 10th grade. She was in 9th. They were on the track team together. She had a boyfriend. He was seeing this one cheerleader but things seemed to go nowhere. Both were screwed. So they became friends. She was happy in his relationship. He wasn't but didn't feel like leaving her either (she was more of a trophy gf because she was very attractive and he became the envy of many men)

They were friends for nearly two years. The cheerleader had long since left and was replaced with a girl that obviously was seen as filler. She was maybe a 7 at best and really had no outstanding qualities, even personality wise. Eventually the HB9 broke up with her boyfriend. They went out ever since.

Back in my AFC days he advised me that there was little wrong in being friends first. A lot of people say "You're in the friend zone" and even I brought this up. He said that it all depends on what you do as a friend. Do you bend over at her every whim? He said that basically he was friendly to her and she never once talked about her boyfriend to him other than if they are still going out or not.

There is a story. Do what you feel is best. Not rely on the same phrases over and over because thousands of slimeballs say the same things. Its not any different nowadays than "If I was in charge of the alphabet I'd put 'u' and 'i' together."
 

Duke

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es_mer8, old buddy, I just don't see exactly where you're going with this.
What is the "DJ Code"?
How is it possible to NOT tailor DJing to your own tastes? I don't get it. Never on this site have I come across a "Getting Women for Dummies" guide that gives step by step instructions with phrases to spit out. More of it is mindset related.

Alright, you dismissed other methods of gaining confidence, so how is one supposed to gain TRUE confidence, as you put it?

As for your friend, there was likely some initial attraction already there.

Then there's the fact that they were both already dating.
Because they were already dating, they appeared more desirable to one another.

NEXT, you say they were on the track team together.
Now have you ever heard DJ gurus preach about how awesome ACTION dates are? It's because ACTION dates heigten one's sensual arousal. Because they practiced so often in a heightened state of energy, it was much easier for them to find one another attractive.

That's why they ended up dating. Becoming a girl's friend first won't work in favor of the avg Joe. If you become friend's first, then you are going to reveal yourself to her, killing mystery and excitement in the process.
 

Boricua_33015

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this is a great post!
 

es_mer8

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What is the "DJ Code"?
This is just a term I made up for the curren behavior that all DJs "should" do in order to find success.

How is it possible to NOT tailor DJing to your own tastes?
Successful DJs personalize their tactics that work for them. However check the DJ Discussion and High School forums. You see nothing but fake DJs because they rely on specific narrowminded tactics and then usually fail anyway because I'm sure the girl has heard it all from other fake DJs.

Think about it and you should know what I mean.

As for your friend, there was likely some initial attraction already there.
Thats almost my point. Girls have been proven to be as horny as guys. Its just that they are taught with restraint and the men have to open up their feelings. Like I said, what are the odds that you can get the women without the obvious BS c+f or fast seduction? Why risk losing all interest from a girl with a neghit that went badly (I've rarely seen it be successful because there is such a fine line and some people get offended more easily than others) Odds are that most women find you somewhat attractive or very attractive. I like to go out with the HB8+ but that doesn't mean that a nice looking 6 doesn't get my attention. I'm sure the same applies for women.

If you become friend's first, then you are going to reveal yourself to her, killing mystery and excitement in the process.
Why? What my friend said was right. When you guys talk about friendship, do you talk about bending over backwards at every command she barks out? Or do you cry to her every night about how life is so hard? A lot of people I don't think get that you don't have to do this BS to be someone's friend. I also know of at least three other people that have dated someone for a long time who was initially their friend. None of them were in the same sport and one of the girls didn't even go out for a sport.

this is a great post!
Thanks. After I posted that, I found your new definition of c+f and it almost coincides with this post. Confident + Funny if you ask me is 100 times better than ****y + Funny.
 
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