People who convince me to date around my age

[Plinco]

What's with people trying to convince people like me to date women around my age? Some form of control? Maybe these people don't respect me enough? These people trying to sabotage me?

 

[RSDCharlie]

What's with people trying to convince people like me to date women around my age? Some form of control? Maybe these people don't respect me enough? These people trying to sabotage me?

Are those people paying your bills? Did those people care when you were bullied in school? If you lose your job tomorrow and are bankrupt, will those people financially support you?

If the answer is No to all, then their opinion doesnt matter.

 

[Murk]

I had the same growing up, family and friends wanting to "marry me off". I had a relationship with a ex boss who was a very high earner, gorgeous, but had a child and a few years older than me. Everyone was surprised when I left her.

Just stay in your own lane and focus on your own life. I look around and everyone has settled. People (in the UK at least with the small space and high property prices) settled to buy a property together. People struggle to get a £50,000 ($63,000) mortgage deposit saved up by themselves to get on the property ladder, it's the easy route.

 

[BuckledWheel]

Never lower your standards. Date who you want to date, if that means younger go for it. Younger chicks are more fun. Chicks who have hit the wall become grumpy & needy. Older women are set in their ways & usually the baggage is heavier to carry. Go with what’s comfortable for you. These people giving you advice aren’t living your life.

 

[Black Widow Void]

Something seems peculiar.

According to you, these alleged people seem to have issues with you seeing younger women.

Instead of you taking the bull by the horns and confronting them directly, you visit the forum and ask strangers to make second guesses?

In my experience, women (particularly younger women) expect a man that is mature to display more of a leadership and assertive role than you are currently exhibiting; which leads me to question this ‘success’ of yours.

As mentioned above, this posting seems a bit peculiar.

 

[SW15]

What's with people trying to convince people like me to date women around my age? Some form of control? Maybe these people don't respect me enough? These people trying to sabotage me?

We don't know what your age is right now, but it is likely 37+. In general, men 33+ or 35+ start expressing dissatisfaction about dating women near their own ages. Nevertheless, most men in their 30s/40s are vagina beggars who end up settling for someone close to their own ages. If you have enough seduction skill to attract and retain someone substantially younger, go for it! Most men don't.

Younger chicks are more fun. Chicks who have hit the wall become grumpy & needy. Older women are set in their ways & usually the baggage is heavier to carry.

I agree. Even childless women in their 30s/40s have substantial baggage, though their baggage is more tolerable than the women with children at home. Even dating a woman with children over 18 who are independent adults (this starts to get more common once women turn 45) is not pleasant. Her adult children will resent you. The last 2 sentences tend to be more applicable for men 50+ here. I wouldn't want to deal with a woman whose adult children only superficially tolerate me but resent me OR her adult children who are openly hostile.

Never lower your standards. Date who you want to date, if that means younger go for it.

I don't know if not lowering standards is good advice. A lot of men have standards that are too high. Also, in the Manosphere, we frequently mention that feminists have pummeled the "Never Settle!" mantra into 30s/40s women all the time. Some of those "Never Settle!" women are living alone with cats and dogs and will likely go into their 50+ years all alone.

 

[Plinco]

Something seems peculiar.

According to you, these alleged people seem to have issues with you seeing younger women.

Instead of you taking the bull by the horns and confronting them directly, you visit the forum and ask strangers to make second guesses?

In my experience, women (particularly younger women) expect a man that is mature to display more of a leadership and assertive role than you are currently exhibiting; which leads me to question this ‘success’ of yours.

As mentioned above, this posting seems a bit peculiar.

I can grab a bull by the balz but that doesn't kill the beast

 

[Black Widow Void]

I can grab a bull by the balz but that doesn't kill the beast

I disagree with your above statement. If someone has the guts to step up to the plate and question you, then it’s your job to step up to the plate toe to toe toe and put them in their place. If you are confident in your position, this will subdue them.

The fact that you are ‘hostage’ to outsiders approval or beliefs (and not willing to confront them directly) again leads me to question your success with these alleged younger women.

 

[Plinco]

I disagree with your above statement. If someone has the guts to step up to the plate and question you, then it’s your job to step up to the plate toe to toe toe and put them in their place. If you are confident in your position, this will subdue them.

The fact that you are ‘hostage’ to outsiders approval or beliefs (and not willing to confront them directly) again leads me to question your success with these alleged younger women.

I appreciate your interest in my topic and I will appreciate any interest you give to me in the future but I think you are misreading what I'm putting out.

 

[AureliusMaximus]

What's with people trying to convince people like me to date women around my age? Some form of control? Maybe these people don't respect me enough? These people trying to sabotage me?

Shaming and nothing else. Jealousy because they like to do the same as you but do not have the ability to do it.
Ignore these negative fvckers.

Do what makes you happy.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

Go tell them to go fvck themselves. Nobody says **** when a woman does this.

 

[SW15]

Nobody says **** when a woman does this.

When a 35-45 year old woman "dates" or has casual sex with an 18-25 year old male, she is celebrated.

 

[Black Widow Void]

Though I have my doubts, assuming this is a legitimate posting, here are the answers (based on my previous experience).

It’s all fairly simple to figure out (or you could ask them directly) and so, I do doubt the legitimacy of this posting. Anyway…

Family - they can view this as you “trying to relive your youth” … “not making mature judgements.”

Women your age - their vanity can feel threatened. If a man their age Is dating younger, then they will feel not only old, but regulated to old (not older, but old) men.

Male friends your age - jealousy or an inability to understand your attraction (should they not also experience this youthful attraction).

Younger males - you are picking fruit from ‘their crop.’ This leads them to either resenting you … and/or leading them to feeling inadequate.

There could be additional reasons, but instead of speculating, I speak based on my own experiences/observations.

 

[Plinco]

I would add the managerial mentality. Wanting to promote "order" and a disregard for the individual.

 

[Barrister]

Generally, this comes from a place of envy/jealousy when you hear this. Envy from men; jealousy from women. It means you are doing it right, brother. Obviously, having a IDGAF attitude about their opinion is the right response here.

 

[CoandaEffect]

You might be taking peoples comments too personally, they may just be trying to give you some advice. I don’t know how old you are but younger than me, no doubt. Have you tried dating people your own age?

I like women that are fit, friendly, feminine, cooperative and submissive. Being younger than me is not on the list. I get on way better with women close to my age, I usually fail with women more than 5 years younger than me.

Don’t take peoples advise as a criticism, they may just be trying to help.

 

[BeExcellent]

Advice from the old lady (hahaha):

Do what suits you. To hell with what anybody else thinks, does or says. One of my cousins, a gorgeous brunette on the SMU women’s golf team a few years back is in a serious relationship with a silver fox 30 years older than her. She was very close with her dad and their jam was golfing as she grew up. So as you might imagine she was brought up all her life around successful men her father’s age. She was acclimated to that. No immature frat guy is going to outcompete that if she is socially calibrated to older established men. That’s a good example of a younger chick who prefers older men who doesn’t have daddy issues. It did ruffle some feathers in the family, but so what? She didn’t care. Her man wasn’t particularly attractive in my book, but he was the golf type, and what she was comfortable around. Lucky him.

So do you and who cares what anyone else thinks. I get women saying things in my ear randomly about my guy (he’s younger as y’all may know) expressing the same kind of sentiment. Envious; jealous. Who cares. We are happy & well suited and doing life.

He didn’t know I was older than him when we met, by the way…and most people assume I’m younger than him.

Attractive people have broad appeal across a broad age range. Men or women. People who remain physically attractive through middle age are outliers and are a product of fortunate genetics and a healthy lifestyle. The reward for that is great choice in the dating marketplace.

Do you and never apologize for that.

Cheers

 

[mrgoodstuff]

What's with people trying to convince people like me to date women around my age? Some form of control? Maybe these people don't respect me enough? These people trying to sabotage me?

Yes. Especially if you are having success in dating the younger ages. Personally from what i know now i'd always stay diversified, i'm not sure i could only focus on "younger". Have a mix, but no don't listen to them that's not how your life works.

 

[DonJuanjr]

Lucky him.

Why lucky him, and not lucky her? Isn't he the catch being the silver fox that's cultured, wise, experienced, etc. A guy that's a cut above those her age?

 

[BeExcellent]

Why lucky him, and not lucky her? Isn't he the catch being the silver fox that's cultured, wise, experienced, etc. A guy that's a cut above those her age?

They are happy. Lucky for them both. Statistically few men are capable of securing a relationship with a 30 year younger very attractive gal who could easily choose a younger man. So yeah lucky him.