People not liking you.

[devils3777]

I know some people (including myself) are bothered by people not liking them (strangers included) or FAIL to go after what they want in life or what they can get in life because they are afraid of ruffling any feathers.

If you think like this, CHANGE NOW!! This is one of the worst mindsets to ever have!

If you want everyone to like you (which is virtually impossible) you will be miserable inside because you are failing to take any action in life and living life walking on eggshells.

I read this once on the internet and it is 100% true.

"Anything worthwhile going after, will ALWAYS piss somebody off" (E.g. Job promotion, good job, nice car, cute girlfriend)

Let's see how this pertains to women and dating.

"Any girl that is atleast cute (6-6.5+), will always receive plenty of male attention and will always have multiple men interested in her."

Obviously, if you make a move on a cute girl, somebody, somewhere out there will dislike you for it (e.g. ex-boyfriend, potential rivals).

If you don't want to piss any guys off when it comes to dating simply don't date or date unattractive looking women (highly unadvisable).


EXPECT AND ACCEPT AND EVEN HOPE SOME PEOPLE DON'T LIKE YOU.

YOU WILL FEEL MUCH BETTER AND BE ABLE TO GO AFTER WHAT YOU WANT IN LIFE WHEN YOU DO!!

 

[noirsake]

Yeah I totally agree. I actually just found out one of my good friends had a serious crush on my girlfriend (this guy is hardcore AFC) and he wasn't happy when he found out my girl and I are dating. There are other guys that like her, but in the end I was the victor and they all now hate me. Except my friend, we're cool now. But being Alpha male is all about guys not liking you. You steal their chick, get the better jobs, have the cooler car..yeah all AFCs hate DJs and you know what? I am damn proud of lots of guys hating me because when they hate me it's because they are jealous!!!

 

[Jon55]

The sooner you stop caring about what other people think of you (or what you're doing), the better. The important thing to remember here though is not to disrespect. The rule applies when you're trying to be yourself or are doing something harmless, not when you're trying to justify yourself by giving someone rufies.

 

[AuthenticAG]

What others think of you has NOTHING to do with you and everything to do with them.

Healthy disregard of what anyone thinks of you.

That approval seeking has to be changed.

 

[devils3777]

Yes, thanks for the replies.

Why worry about stuff you can't control?

THere will always be ugly guys and AFC's who will always hate on the successful guys.

 

[Interceptor]

Great thread here.
Good work, devil.

 

[Vypros]

EXPECT AND ACCEPT AND EVEN HOPE SOME PEOPLE DON'T LIKE YOU.

YOU WILL FEEL MUCH BETTER AND BE ABLE TO GO AFTER WHAT YOU WANT IN LIFE WHEN YOU DO!!

Expecting and accepting and hoping that some people won't like you is NO DIFFERENT than expecting and accepting and hoping that people WILL like you.

If you consider it "validating" yourself to worry if people like you, then it's equally validating to worry or to even concern yourself in anyway that people don't like you. The only difference is that one makes you a "nice guy" and the other makes you an "*******".

And your solution to female problems ARE NOT to become an *******. You don't have to make people hate you to get women anymore than what you used to believe (that you had to make people like you) to get women.

Instead of focusing on sh*t like this, I would suggest focusing on what you want out of life, but don't neglect other people to do it.

Have priorities:

1. Number one priority is to seek your own happiness and make your life the way you want it to be.

2. Number two priority is to make sure your family and friends are happy.

3. Number three is to make sure that the work you do is worthwhile and something you enjoy.

Get the picture? The way you have this worded makes it sound like you are going to HAVE to piss SOMEONE off to get what you want, and that simply is NOT true. Sometimes, yeah, but not always so don't make it such a "ok, I gotta get what I want by pissing someone off" issue.

 

[Fujichrome]

Good thread. This reminds me of Katt Williams and what he said about not having enough haters.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sp7NiPOcGbs

 

[stuka1939]

I like the Katt Williams thing.

We should strive to have haters instead of worrying if we have any or if our actions will bring them.

I feel better already.

 

[Charlie Gordon]

This has to be one of my favorite discussions in any forum associated with the community.

People who know me personally will attest that I suffer from this complex more than I care to admit.

One of my close friends and greatest teachers was perhaps the opposite - he had very little regard or respect for strangers unless they demanded it. He never held back an opinion and thrived in conflict. I learned a lot from him and it has helped.

I think that a good number of today's men were raised to be considerate and empathic. Some of them either didn't fight enough as children or never learned to stand up for themselves appropriately, physically or verbally. The result is a tendency to avoid conflict.

Another group of men learned to take advantage of kindness and empathy. They learned to stand up for themselves and be assertive. As I type this, one of those guys is probably waking up in bed with the lady you have your sights set on.

And yet a third group of men learned to balance kindness and assertiveness... aren't many of them around unfortunately.

Considering that when it comes to being a man, very few role models exists for us these days, it is not surprising that those of us who go out of our way to be kind and like to avoid confrontation end up getting stepped on... or at the very least end up with fewer friends, fewer accomplishments, and fewer options for romantic partners.

Any sort of disposition for shyness or sensitivity compounds these tendencies and their consequences a hundred fold!

I'd imagine that a lot of these men frequent the forum so this discussion is extremely appropriate.

 

[Axcell]

Great read - people should definetly follow this, very true.

 

[Poonani Maker]

I know. I just got back from bike riding where I stopped at the top of a foothill, and these out-of-towners from New Zealand and England asked me to take their pictures. I complied. We talked a little bit them saying how beautiful it is here and me giving them directions to various places. Well, I started feeling this superiority complex coming from the lone male in the group 4 vs. 1 (me). So I cut the convo short and headed off on my bike. Fvck em.

I was ignoring the perky little lass from England, my target, and I could tell that she was getting frustrated that I would not pay her any attention (she turned around and walked off to look at the views).

You can't please everybody. I took their fvckin pictures. What more do they want? Sheesh.

 

[Wynston]

I'm the frontman of a rockband, and on stage I portray a certain arrogance, I'm not arrogant if you met me, but on stage I am the dogss Bolleeeks and I want people to think that because the arrogance creates power, guys dont like it and we all know in this situation the higher number of guys that hate you, the higher number of girls that love you!!! So be portray an arrogance but then when you speak to girls be all nice and polite the rule of contrast creates attraction too, if they thought you were an a$$hole and you turn out to be a good guy then they will like you more!!

 

[Groovy]

bumping this awsome thread

 

[Dstructor]

I found myself caring less about what others like when i started taking what i like and want more seriously and with more respect

 

[Alle_Gory]

True.

Why is this dude banned?

 

[Andy_Dufresne]

I know some people (including myself) are bothered by people not liking them (strangers included) or FAIL to go after what they want in life or what they can get in life because they are afraid of ruffling any feathers.

 

[Duffdog]

I will take it a step further and say that for one person to be successful, you have to step on two beneath you. No, they won't like you. The higher up you go, the more people you have to stomp on to get there-- if you don't they will stomp on you. It is the essence of humanity. Just think, if you were a girl, would you want the guy doing the stepping or the guy getting stepped on? So get out there and start stealing chics from chumps, they didn't deserve them anyways.