Lots of guys, see a woman working at the grocery store, a local bar, or maybe a nearby coffee shop and think she is cute. The lady is always friendly, she greets you by your first name, says hi with a great big smile and you often share some laughs.
You actually look forward to seeing this individual with each and every visit. You notice she is not wearing a ring and you innocently inquire about her availability, saying something like “your boyfriend is a lucky guy” ….she says she does not have one or something similar. The attraction begins and she is now the object of your desire. You decide to make your affections known by offering your number or suggesting you two go for a drink sometime. You may even go as far as to send her flowers, buy her favorite coffee, or bring her a little gift with a note. She gets a little red faced and cheerfully says thank-you. For some strange reason, she is a little reluctant to take you up on your generous offer (meet outside of work) and you are wondering what’s up with the hesitation.
You are a nice guy, she always says hi to you, you guys get along great, share some laughs, so what gives? This scenario is very common with shy men who are clueless when it comes to the attraction process. These women are referred to as HIRED GUNS. They get paid to be friendly to their customers, especially the regulars. They act nice to increase the sales for the store or get more money from you in the form of tips/commissions. Do Not mistake common courtesy for affection or attraction, they are just doing their job. They appreciate your patronage but that’s as far as it goes. The attraction was one sided from the get-go, taking a business relationship and crossing over to a personal one is a very bold step. Instead of wasting your hard-earned cash on a chance a stranger may return your affection, you could have teased her a bit from the very beginning to see if there were any signals of real mutual attraction.
Giving out your phone number screams desperation. Saying stuff like “hey if you ain’t doing nothing, maybe we could go out sometime” or “do you have a boyfriend, are you married” all create an image of a guy that is out on the prowl. Sending flowers may seem nice but in reality it can creep a few women out. It says I really find you attractive and even though I barely know you I already like you.
Anytime you have to resort to purchasing things to make your intentions known, you are buying their affection, trying to bribe someone to spend time with you. That random act of super kindness might be interpreted as thoughtful but will almost never lead to anything meaningful. By doing all these things initially before you even know this person, screams wuss behavior. You are telling the person you do not know any other way to get them to like you and you are not confident enough to rely on your own self. If a chic is not attracted to you in the slightest, no amount of gifts, nice gestures, compliments, flowers, love letters, how good you make yourself look, will make her change her mind.
You actually look forward to seeing this individual with each and every visit. You notice she is not wearing a ring and you innocently inquire about her availability, saying something like “your boyfriend is a lucky guy” ….she says she does not have one or something similar. The attraction begins and she is now the object of your desire. You decide to make your affections known by offering your number or suggesting you two go for a drink sometime. You may even go as far as to send her flowers, buy her favorite coffee, or bring her a little gift with a note. She gets a little red faced and cheerfully says thank-you. For some strange reason, she is a little reluctant to take you up on your generous offer (meet outside of work) and you are wondering what’s up with the hesitation.
You are a nice guy, she always says hi to you, you guys get along great, share some laughs, so what gives? This scenario is very common with shy men who are clueless when it comes to the attraction process. These women are referred to as HIRED GUNS. They get paid to be friendly to their customers, especially the regulars. They act nice to increase the sales for the store or get more money from you in the form of tips/commissions. Do Not mistake common courtesy for affection or attraction, they are just doing their job. They appreciate your patronage but that’s as far as it goes. The attraction was one sided from the get-go, taking a business relationship and crossing over to a personal one is a very bold step. Instead of wasting your hard-earned cash on a chance a stranger may return your affection, you could have teased her a bit from the very beginning to see if there were any signals of real mutual attraction.
Giving out your phone number screams desperation. Saying stuff like “hey if you ain’t doing nothing, maybe we could go out sometime” or “do you have a boyfriend, are you married” all create an image of a guy that is out on the prowl. Sending flowers may seem nice but in reality it can creep a few women out. It says I really find you attractive and even though I barely know you I already like you.
Anytime you have to resort to purchasing things to make your intentions known, you are buying their affection, trying to bribe someone to spend time with you. That random act of super kindness might be interpreted as thoughtful but will almost never lead to anything meaningful. By doing all these things initially before you even know this person, screams wuss behavior. You are telling the person you do not know any other way to get them to like you and you are not confident enough to rely on your own self. If a chic is not attracted to you in the slightest, no amount of gifts, nice gestures, compliments, flowers, love letters, how good you make yourself look, will make her change her mind.