Paying for a flight

[Slickster]

I think DonS is referring to the fact that you had to ask these questions as being bad.

You didn't pay for her flight = good

You ignored her texts when she started talking about her ex and her problems = good

You got some flirting in = good

You got her wishing she was home = good

You told her you missed her = not good.

Overall I think you are doing okay as long as you aren't obsessing over her. Her interest level in you obviously isn't that high so I wouldn't be showing too much interest back.

 

[jophil28]

Use this general rule before acting

'Would I do what I am about to do, if it was a guy instead of a girl?'

Well, you would pay for a ticket if the guy was your best friend, so you probably would pay for the ticket if she was your long-term gf and showed loyalty.

But would you pay for a ticket for a guy who was simply an acquiantance? No. So don't pay for this girl who you are not close with.

Smart thinking again from Trader.

 

[jophil28]

Would it be considered a chump move to tell a girl you'll pay for her flight tickets to come see you if she is low on funds to pay for herself?

How did the conversation about flight payment come up.
I just read this whole thread, and my senses tell me that she is a "victim" who often finds herself in strife because of her bad choices and then whines about how she needs to be rescued ( of course, without actually saying so ).

Cognac, you are wasting your valuable 'man energy' on this woman. What can she possible contribute to your life ?
Point your testosterone at other women.

 

[cognac]

I hear ya guys. I'm trying to game a chic that is way too far away to game. Never had to deal with the distance situation which kills my game because of no physical interaction.

How should I approach this? I'm just gonna put her on the back burner til she moves back. Not contact her at all. What do I do if she contacts me? Just play it distant and indifferent but friendly? Don't want to fall into the friend zone on this one. I've got other broads I screw around with but I just click more with this one.

 

[cognac]

Jophil I dunno if she is or not. That's a problem in itself if it's true because there's no physical contact for the time being due to the distance. She wasn't like that when we use to hang out and crap.

The payment topic never really came up. She just said she wished she could come home for the holidays. Stupid me started thinking maybe I could pay for her flight. Never said anything to her about it though.

 

[jophil28]

The payment topic never really came up. She just said she wished she could come home for the holidays. Stupid me started thinking maybe I could pay for her flight. Never said anything to her about it though.

You better read Rollo on how women behave covertly. That includes asking for what they want from men in obtuse ways, as in your example quoted above.

 

[jophil28]

Jophil I dunno if she is or not. That's a problem in itself if it's true because there's no physical contact for the time being due to the distance. She wasn't like that when we use to hang out and crap.

The payment topic never really came up. She just said she wished she could come home for the holidays. Stupid me started thinking maybe I could pay for her flight. Never said anything to her about it though.

I ask you again - what, of any value, can this woman possibly contribute to your life?

I had an ex from 12 years ago contact me a few weeks ago . I know what she wants - she wants some comfort and attention from me while she waits for the BBD to come along.
I had a few days of thinking that I could just bang her a few times for fun and old times sake, but she is now starting to play some mindgames so I just put on ignore two days ago.

I suggest you do the same.

 

[cognac]

Thanks Jophil. I pondered this for a couple hours after reading your response. It's the best approach to just drop her out of reality.

I came to the conclusion that I really messed up a couple months ago when she said: " I don't know what you want from me or what you're expecting." Dummy me fell for the trap and flat out told her. Yikes. Game over most likely. Probably friend-zoned but she's non-confrontational so she won't flat out say it and is just using me as a therapist because she always brings the subject of her problems up. I always cut it short right there by changing the subject or just telling her I gotta get up off the phone. Telling her what I want really killed it most likely huh? Time to just back off.

 

[jophil28]

I came to the conclusion that I really messed up a couple months ago when she said: " I don't know what you want from me or what you're expecting." nonDummy me fell for the trap and flat out told her.

That is a 'distancing' statement by her.
The womanspeek translation is something like this, " Whatever you are expecting from me is not gonna happen.. I want you around for my own convenience only, and I am not interested in a mutually beneficial relationship."

She knew (or assumed ) that you , like all men wanted to fvkk her and perhaps re-ignite the relationship with her. If she was likewise interested in that, her BEHAVIOR would have told you.
Women are simple creatures- if they are interested in you they will tell you in ways via their actions, albeit often subtle.

Interested = moving toward you.
Not interested = creating distance.

 

[Colossus]

Probably not the best idea to get involved with a chic who has ex issues and kids.

 

[cognac]

Yeah I'm disconnecting myself from this but want to keep her open as an option. Seems like it'll be a rollercoaster ride right now.

Hell, last night she kept texting me asking me what I was up to around 1am. Told her I was at a New Years partay. Then she kept texting me but I didn't answer cuz I was having fun gettin smashed for New Years at the partay having a good time. The last one she sent was: "U already passed out huh! It's 2am here." (4am where I'm at cuz of the time difference). Sent her a message today around noon saying, "Yup passed out. Had a great time though." She then replied she had fun last night too. I never asked cuz I don't really care what she did for new years and just told her great that she had a good time. And frankly I figured she couldn't have been having that much fun if she was sending me messages for the most part of the night. Then she says you're probably gonna meet someone before I get back there in the spring and were you really serious about wanting to get back together?(The crap I slipped out that I shouldn't have a couple months ago). I never responded yet cuz it seems like some kinda **** test. What do I say to that or should i even respond?

 

[princelydeeds]

I've met her before. Already flew out to see her earlier in the year but had no action even though I had the chance. She's from where I live so she'd be staying at her parents for the week if I do pay for her flight.

WTF, Oh HELL No!!! I wouldn't even consider it!

 

[cognac]

huh. Oneitis? Far from it. I have my usual plate girls. I'm posting here to get a heads up on what to do til the broad moves back, dur.