Passed her little test, but there's a problem...RARE PLEA FOR ADVICE BY ME!

[STR8UP]

Just got off the phone with one of the girls I met recently.

At the end I asked her what time she gets off work tomorrow, and told her she should meet me for a drink afterwards. To which she responds, "Let me call you tomorrow"

There haven't been too many times in my life I've had this happen, but in the past when it HAS happened I probably would have agreed.

Now that I KNOW BETTER, I immediately put an end to that nonsense. I told her, "No that's not good enough. I need either a yes or a no". Then she says, "Well, I have to check my planner". HAHA! I laughed and told her she wasn't fooling anyone (in a joking way, of course), and to be here at 8:30.

So I gave her my # in case she doesn't remember how to get back to my place, and we hang up.

Then she calls back 10 min. later and says she forgot she had plans to get dinner with her friend, and that I should bring along MY friend and join them.

The thing is, MY friend doesn't want anything to do with HER friend, and it's kinda fukked up for her to even suggest a group thing on a first meeting. From the way she said it she almost sounded like it was a legitimate excuse, but my experience tells me other wise.

Now, it could just be that she is trying to get her friend hooked up too, but hell, she shouldn't do that kind of thing to fukk up her own deal on a first meeting providing she's truly interested, right?

At the end of the second convo after I told her I would have to ask my friend if he was able to go, she said, "or you could just meet us without him, it doesn't matter" which sounded like she knew I was balking at her offer and wanted to make sure I didn't say forget it completely. By the tone of her voice I could tell she KNEW I wasn't thrilled with her suggestion.

So whaddya think?

I'm thinking I should call her back and cancel it completely.

 

[RazzleDazzle]

Cancel, give her the ultimatum. You and her or nothing. Sounds like you called her BS. Good going. Why women play these immature games is beyond me. Girls mature faster than boys my anus!!!

 

[isotope]

yeah she sounds like she is a girl who plays games... unless you are up to the challenge of that

 

[MDgood]

First, str8up, let me congratulate you on your DJing. Wonderful job. You put the girl in a corner masterfully, and it is in that that I believe you may have created your own problem of confusion.

Perchance, could this confusion be caused by the fact that you may have an initial deep attraction to this woman? Is it maybe blocking your perception?

Well, whatever the reason for being confused, I think you have stuck yourself into a situation where you can only discover what this woman thinks of you by actually going out on another date with her. The situation with your friend and her friend caused you to end up shutting down all her avenues of escape in your conversation, and in doing so now you can't rightly figure out whether or not you're in.

Dude, I think going out with them both is a bit dweeby. Sure, it would be good practice DJing either two women, or DJing one while there's a potential ****block sitting next to her. But you're looking for personal time with the girl. My advice: Tell her to whip out her datebook and give you a definite time you two can go out alone.

 

[Drex]

Go alone and hit on her friend all night infront of her

 

[MDgood]

Go alone and hit on her friend all night infront of her

DREX, YOU ARE A GOD!!!

I should have seen that one!!!!!

Awesome!!! Nothing better in the world to toally piss her off and get a rise out of her!

This one girl was playing games with me a few months ago, so I started hitting on her cute sister. It backfired in a certain way, because now I have absolutely no clue what the girl thinks of me, but still, it felt soooooo good, and these things work themselves out eventually

 

[Drex]

Originally posted by MDgood
DREX, YOU ARE A GOD!!!

I wouldnt go that far....yet. I am still learning!

 

[MDgood]

You shall go far, young man, you shall go far.

 

[One on One]

This reminds me of the theory on phone calls. If she's interested, it doesn't matter when the **** you call. Same thing here, if you don't want to go out with her friend, she'll still want to go out with you another time...if she's interested. Just cancel it completely...the friend is just trouble.

 

[Tyler]

Originally posted by Drex
Go alone and hit on her friend all night infront of her

This is 100% correct.

 

[icehot]

women don't forget!

I got this piece of advice when i first came to this site and had a similar situation as you: Women have been learning to plan their social life since they were old enough to read cosmo.

She didn't "forget" about dinner plans with friends. I'm guessing that her IL is not that high and by asking you to come out with her friends, she's setting you up for a LJBF.

I say you don't show up and don't even bother calling her to tell her that you'll be a no show.

If you get a "where were you last night?" kinda phone call, then maybe you're still in. If not, NEXT!

-iceH

 

[STR8UP]

GAME ON fellas!

Called her back and told her my boy was busy tomorrow. Before I could get to telling her to "forget about it" we ended up in conversation.

Then she drops the bomb.

She says, "You know, there's something I have to tell you". I'm like, "Um, okay". Then she proceeds to explain how she has a long distance boyfriend in another state that she sees once or twice per year. She said it on an apologetic, almost regretful tone.

I was kinda stumped cause I TOTALLY didn't expect it. She says, "I thought I told you this before". I thought about it for a second, and then remembered that not only had she NOT told me she has a boyfriend, when my buddy asked if she were married she held up her empty ring finger without saying a word. I took that as "I'm single". I even told her she was full of sh!t, she hadn't told me.

So she goes on to tell me how her friends have been talking about me, how they think I'm interested in her and all, and how they've been reminding her that she's "technically single". Funny, she must have mentioned how her friends keep reminding her that she is "technically single" and how she "needs to get out and have a good time" THREE TIMES in two minutes of convo. Sounds like an invitation for me to be the one to show her that good time!

Discalimer made, GAME ON!

We had a bad cell connection and I couldn't think of anything else to say so I said fukk it and hit the 'end' button. LOL! (((RING)))(((RING)))(((RING))), I wasn't gonna even answer it , but I said what the hell.

The extra minute gave me a chance to recompose. WE talked for a couple more minutes and I told her I had to go to the gym. We were saying goodbye and she asked if we were still gonna have the drink! I paused for a second and told her that it would have to be at the time I mentioned (before her friend gets off work, haha) and for HER to call ME tomorrow when she gets off work. She says, "Yea, 8:30!" Now she thinks she has something to prove to ME!

Hows THAT for going from being the predator to the prey? It was PRICELESS I tell you!

I KNOW she's into me......earlier on the phone we were talking about working out and she said, "YOU look WAY better than XXXXX" (talking about my friend who is about 10% bodyfat and looks like a rock star...) In the club she won't leave my vicinity when I'm around. I go and dance with other chicks, come back, and she's right there waiting for me. At my house the other night she was putting her hand on my leg and sh!t...it's on, baby!

She asked towards the end of our last convo if in fact I did "see her in that way" I said, "Nah, you're too young anyways, you're a baby" LOL! She's 21, I'm 31.

If we get together tomorrow I'm gonna play the boyfriend advocate with my words, and in the meantime let my ACTIONS dictate what I really want.

And for the record, her friend is pushin' 200. I don't think I could flirt with her if my life depended upon it.

 

[Drex]

Hey STR8UP Is this girl #1 or girl #2 in regards to your previous post (where you planned on bumping into both of them at the same club)? Or neither of them?

 

[bothbarrels]

That's freaking hilarious

Man, I say that because I dated this biatch a while back who pulled that **** on me. I recognized her bull**** later on down the road and finally called her on her bull****.
Great come back by the way. I would love to be in that position again. I would totally play that chick with a huge smile on my face.
Look if she can't make the date, find someone else who can. If she is anything like the girl(attention freak) I dated in the past( I could be wrong) I wouldn't put all my eggs in one basket...I have a good feeling she won't be either.

Good Luck

 

[STR8UP]

Originally posted by MDgood
Perchance, could this confusion be caused by the fact that you may have an initial deep attraction to this woman? Is it maybe blocking your perception?

Nah, she's cute and all (petite asian girl, nice ass), but at this point anyways, I couldn't see having much more than a casual thing with her.

Matter of fact it took me a couple of weeks to even get her # cause I wasn't sure if I wanted to proceed.

Now I'm pretty interested...to know she has a b/f in another state (I know, what kinda joke is that) I find it an interesting challenge, not to mention the fact that I can do whatever I want even if I get some from her....after all, she has a boyfriend, hehe!

 

[STR8UP]

Originally posted by Drex
Hey STR8UP Is this girl #1 or girl #2 in regards to your previous post (where you planned on bumping into both of them at the same club)? Or neither of them?

WOOHOOHOO! I almost forgot!

Yea, this is #2.

Now that I know she has a boyfriend I don't have to pu$$yfoot around and watch what I do in the club if they both show, I can totally throw down on both of them at the same time!

Her dropping this bomb was the best thing she could have done.

I'M GONNA HAVE SOME FUN WITH THIS!

 

[Drex]

Ok so this is the girl you percieved as a "tease" and you thought she wouldnt put out but your friend insisted she wanted you. Dont forget about girl #1 though, she sounded like better GF material.

 

[STR8UP]

No, no, the tease is married.

Did I get the #'s confused?

I don't think I could seriously date a girl that young anyways. Jeezus, when I was 20 she was like 10, LOL!

 

[Drex]

No, maybe I got the numbers confused. I didnt double check, lol. I'll do that now.

*edit* - Ok I was wrong, girl #2 is the reserved one.

 

[Drex]

Originally posted by STR8UP
I don't think I could seriously date a girl that young anyways.

But you are; arent you?

Just go for it, she's old enough to take her anywhere.