Panik's Journal

[Panik]

--------------------------------------------------------------------------
I've been out of the game for the past 3 months and I hadn't realized how rusty I've gotten. I've been sharing my journal on my lair site for the past few days, so I thought I'd also share it with you guys. Feel free to comment, just be mature about it. Constructive criticism is encouraged. Hopefully, I will be able to document my growth (i didn't do it the first time) so that others may benefit from it.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Up to now, i haven't really had the discipline to keep an 'online' journal, but, I suppose it wouldn't hurt to have one here after all.

12/05/06

Just came back from school. Last day of Eng class. Said bye to my 1-itis, as she's going back to Sarasota for a month. F'd her last night, so it's all good.

I've decided to dedicate this month absolutely to the game. Unlike the past, I'm breaking everything into little chunkcs and working on them piece by piece. I'm also following a plan and some basic community rules (this journal being one of them).

Those close to me know that I'm more focused on "lifestyle game" (read the section on The Game where Style throws a birthday party for my inspiration) than on the usual technique-based b.s. that seems so prevalent in our community. This does not mean I won't use techniques, just that, unlike b.s.'ing with fake DHVs, my plan is to structure my life in such a way that I become a walking DHV/attraction machine.

It's all simpler than it sounds, one can achieve incredible things by changing one's habits and doing a little bit at a time every day.


6:00

Circuit City

Just came back from Circuit City. Was looking at the newest PC's. Noticed an HB8 shoot down a salesman who approached her. Used that as my opener. Her name was Mia. We chatted for over 5 mins. She actually added to the conversation. She's a performer @ Busch Gardens--has the body to be one too. Just moved back to Tampa from Syracuse, NY.

She's also friends with one of my FBs who also happens to be a performer at the park. She asked me where I knew her from and I lied. Should have told her she was my FB. This totally threw my game out the window---they can smell a lie 1000 feet away.

Overall, interaction was pretty good, although I admit I was totally uncalibrated. I was neither a routine jockey nor an entertaining monkey. It was EXTREMELY not as fluid as I'm used to. Should get smoother a week from now.

She told me how much she liked myspace and how she was just shopping for a $2000 laptop for the sole purpose of using the site. Had I had a decent myspace, I could have just told her to add me. My incredulous dad walks in in the middle and pulls me away to congratulate me for talking to a hot chick. I went for the # and she told me she had a BF and that she'd think about it. Total bull****, since I was about to leave. Since she's the first HB that I 'cold approach' in about 2 months, it was expected.

Note: Stick to M3 model order. Did not follow ANY of the rules. Apparently it doesn't matter once you get a certain level of approaches under your belt, yet, it still makes the EXTREMELY more effective and increases your closing rates. Work on tonality. Get an actual myspace. Don't go sarging with your dad next to you when he doesn't believe you're a PUA. Use a bit more energy during sarging. Wink

On a lighter note, my dad congratulated me and even a friend of mine who works @ the store came up to me and said he saw everything. Apparently, going up to random HBs is out of people's realities.

Borders

Went to a nearby Borders and looked around, NO CHICKS...well, no HOT chicks. Opened some 30 something black woman and we talked about REI. She's a nice woman, too bad she wasn't attractive at all. Gave her my business card and, since she asked me for some recommendations on the topic, I showed her some books---she might actually bring me some deals in the near future.

Note: Once again, it was kind of sketchy. My throat keeps on closing up and I get this stupid raspy tone. People DO NOT expect to be approached, so don't worry if they look a bit 'snapped out' whenever you approach them. Just be the bigger person and keep pushing until they break out of their shell.

Might go out later, but it all depends on my schedule and energy level. Was supposed to go out for coffee with an HB6 that I've banged already but she lives 42 mins away and can't drive all the way here...NEXT! She can wait.

 

[Panik]

12/06/06

12/06/06

12:20

Went to the bank this morning. 0 attractive women.

Decided to pass by the library and "pick up" some books. 0 attractive women.

Went to get some cheap office supplies @ Big Lots. 1 attractive chick.

Big Lots

Somewhat of a Butterface (everything BUT her face is hot), but with a REALLY nice ass. Opened her with "Hey, do you know where they keep the Hydrogen Peroxide (I've been reading the oral hygiene thread and thought I'd tried it out). She tells me she doesn't work there. I tell her I got the clue but since she was on the aisle before me maybe she knew. Started a convo by busting on her "What, are you new here or something? I thought chicks were required to know where stuff like that was." She tells me she just moved here from Miami about a week ago. I joke about Tampa being a farm compared to Miami. She complies. I was going to segway into "hey, do you have new furniture? (I sell furniture at discount prices) or some crap to keep her talking but then---POOF---she just walks away from me! NEXT.

Note: My body language was EXTREMELY ****ed up. I did not make a lot of eye contact, since I was "looking for something"---once I open, there's no need to fake anything else...from that moment on it becomes a 'pickup'. Once again my throat closed up, although it was not as bad as yesterday. Am I rusty or what?

I haven't read any seduction material in 2 months and I've realized how important reading/listening to the stuff is to keep you motivated AND alert. I had some approach anxiety before opening her (she WAS pretty attractive, green eyes, blonde hair, nice butt...about an HB8 had it not been for the braces) yet, I was able to talk myself into approaching her.

I've also realized that there are two things that keep you from taking action: 1) Fear and 2) Lack of knowledge. From now on, every time I feel weird before doing anything (approaches, etc.) or even procrastinate, I mentally analyze the situation and if it's 'fear based' I jump into it, period---best cure I've found so far. Fear is very deceptive though so it can be tricky to find out which is which.

I went to Wal-Mart afterwards. Opened an elderly couple. Totally retarded since they spoke neither English nor Spanish, but it's still an approach. Didn't see any HBs ANYWHERE. Walked around the store twice. Bought a Darth Vader voice changer mask for $10 though. Didn't like it AT ALL and just realized I have no space for it. Going back to return it in the afternoon---WILL do more sarging.

Tonight, I plan to stick to actual openers. I'm too out of shape to pull off my usual style of pickup. Following the Style/Mystery structure. Let's see what happens.

I remember Zuzu at the approach-athon talking about how these openers were field tested to provide an actual response, thus, I may use them as training wheels for now.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

8:10

Wal-Mart

Walked in, walked, walked, walked--- 0 hot chicks. Hell, there weren't even unnatractive chicks to talk to that were around my age.

Decided to go to the Dollar store and look for targets.

Dollar Store

0 chicks again. Went back to Wal-Mart.

Wal-Mart

Open an HB8. Super tight body. Latin chick. Her name was Rosa and she's from the Dominican Republic. It all went well had her thugged out husband not showed up 2 seconds later. Walked around. 0 targets. Remembered that I had to buy a Lotto ticket for my grandma so I went to SweetBay to see if I could improve my chances.

SweetBay

Walked around. Got IOI'd from the chick who sold me the ticket. HB6, cute face, blue eyes. Looks like either a senior in HS or freshman in college.

Walked around. Saw another latin chick by herself. HB8, about 30 something. I was looking at some lobsters when she AI'd me. Opened her with "Do you know where they stack the supplements?" She smiled at me and didn't say a word. Chick didn't know how to speak English. No problem for me, I'm trilingual. Too bad I wasn't expecting it and it totally made my mind go blank. I repeated the opener in Spanish. For some reason I get all beta while talking in Spanish. She seemed somewhat responsive, but I lost my posture and took myself out of the set before I was even in it.

Finally found the supplements and bought a pack of One-A-Day active. I've been feeling drained lately and that should do the trick.

Pharmacist chick hits on me, I guess it was due to my being semi-peacocked. "You're telling me you want something so that you last longer...what, ladies keeping wearing you down?" Too bad she's 40 something and totally not hot.

note: I keep on carrying the act of actually looking for something for waaay too long. Once I open,it's time to drop it, yet it's like a frigging habit. Totally makes me look EXTREMELY weird and borderline creepy. It's supposed to make the interaction natural but it isn't. I could sense it this time. Voice is still waay to chokey. In addition to that, I'm waay too ****ing serious when I'm by myself. That's also got to change. You know what guys, sarging w/o a wing to **** around with is totally a different game; especially so when you have cooled off like I did. Got a final tomorrow, so enough sarging for tonight.

I'm actually glad for all the ****-ups though. At least I'm going to have something to look at and compare myself to a month from now when I'm back in the big leagues.

For once, I'm going to start applying the 80-20 rule to this ****er. There HAS to be more places besides the ones near my house where more there are actually SOME chicks.

 

[Panik]

12/07/06

4:21

School

Res. Methods Class

Today, I decided to do something out of the ordinary. I basically went to school dressed up as I would when I go out to clubs.

I hadn't been to this class in over 2 months, but since they were having the final review, I decided to show up.

I got there late, so I just sat on the first empty chair I saw. Incredibly enough---poof, I happened to sit next to this girl I'd been sarging in the beginning of the course. I started a convo with another girl who was sitting next to me. Got her laughing in a few seconds with some C&F comments about the teacher and the class. Too bad she was an HB4. Not worth my time. Incredibly enough, from the corner of my eye, I notice the first chick start fidgeting nervously. Two seconds later, she opens me. That's when I finally realize who she was and then "I" started fidgeting. Incredibly enough, I caught myself and remained cool. She kept on talking to me, and the more she spoke, the less attracted I became. She's big into drugs (i'm not), had a hickie on her neck, and had gained about 20lbs from the beginning of the semester. NEXT.

Left the class, had some lunch with my fb. Went back to take an exam. Once again, chicks were opening me back and forth. In the whole semester, today was like the first day ppl actually talked 'to' me before I started the convo. Some chick (HB4) whom I had talked to in the beginning of the term for a few minutes but gave me enough IOIs to know she wanted some even came up and offered me her notes after the exam. When I finished, she 'threw' her exam at the teacher and followed me. I was like "thanks for the notes" and she gave me a big hug. I would have number closed her but I'm sure I could get attached to her and she's more of a 'wife material' than the type of hot girl I'm looking to **** around with. That and she's a fundie which, well, means that it would never work out between us. Big deal. Wink I said "later" and she dissapeared. Apparently, she got upset that I didn't # close her. In retrospect, I should since goody two shoes are usually a blast in bed (they have been in the past) but since it's just my 2nd official day 'back in the game'---whatever.

I flirted with a few HB7s and above on my way to a teacher conference I had and back to the parking lot. I had some issues since they were both moving sets, but it wasn't anything serious either.

Before leaving, I passed by the Anthro office to say bye to my TA and got hit on by both secretaries. Although they're both unnatractive and older than me, I'm not exactly used to the treatement. They were flirting and REALLY explicit about it it too. I guess it pays off to dress up like a dude who gets laid after all.

My TA invited me to a concert this sat night, but I politely refused. She's 40 something, has 2 daughters my age and although she's kind of hot, well, no...I'm still keeping in contact with her, since she says she wants to introduce me to her daughters. Not a bad deal, they're both HB8's and one of them even plays guitar like I do. Anyway, a mother in law like her wouldn't hurt either. She's a pretty cool woman, too bad about the age gap. I guess her daughterS will do. Wink


B&N

Decided to do some extra sarging at B&N. Walked in, 0 hot chicks. Pulled out some sales books and sat next to a HB5 black chick. She totally did not expect for me to sit next to her after I asked "Anyone using this chair?" and was actually vocal about it. Her name is Ashley and she's going to HCC for nursing. Talked for a while but she was neither sexy nor interesting enough to keep me talking.

Decided to walk around after about 10 mins. See an HB8 in the puzzle section. Black hair and a proportioned body, fit, green eyes. I do an environmental opener? (forgot the name) Ask her if puzzles really make you smart. She tells me she's into puzzles (duh?!) but that she doesn't feel smarter, that she's just gotten better at them with practice. I actually make her folow me and show her this book that pays 1 mill pounds to whoever solves the puzzle. I ask her if she's going to school. She's on the Navy. ****! She was actually leaving for Hawaii tomorrow too! Has to stay 3 years there. Her name is Jessy and she's a cryptographer for the navy. I would have # closed her, but it would have been a waste of time. Or so it seeed at the moment. I just realized how good having a place to stay in Hawaii would have been! We were in rapport and she definitely digged me, though I didn't really get turned on by her. Conversation died down and she dissapeared.

Not too bad though, I actually had 2 conversations that lasted more than 5 mins! Took me a few months to do that when I got started. This time, it took me 3 days! I love the game!

Notes: I'm still choking up while talking to people. It's a habit so it will take time to change. Long as I attack it consciously, I should be fine. Voice and tonality are +++ for PUAs. As you can tell from the post I'm still NOT following the MM structure (openers, etc.) which might be the reason for my previous performance. I did isolate and bounced (mini-bounced) Jessy (is that the correct term? you know, when you move them from one place to the other) and it worked wonders. Aside from that, my energy levels are still low, so I'm going to have to work on that AND I'm still on autopilot most of the time. Today I was a bit more conscious though. Can't wait to read this about 3 months from now! Wink

Might go out at night, but it all depends on some work I have to do. Still got 2 finals to tackle and work--related stuff to finish. Who knows, if I'm bored at around 8 or 9, I might hit a SuperTarget or something.

Oh, by the way, though this might seem unrelated. It's important enough to note:

Last night, I worked out for a while and, as can be expected, today I spent the whole day sore as hell. Yet, I realized something, being in touch with your body, a.k.a, 'soreness' is really something important in this game. When you're in touch, you realize the importance of your body and how much doing things that make it stronger or please it (sex!) can impact your life. I actually felt sexy, or say, an increase on libido after I was done. It's hard to explain but if it's ever happened to you, I bet the phrase "comfortable in my own skin" would become more meaningful.

I suppose that this body connection is one of the things that keeps women conscious and lets them kick our asses. Think about it, they're walking around carrying pounds of fat that hang from their chest, wearing a pound of make up, expensive clothes, dolled up hair and usually shaved legs and private parts that probably provide them with sensation whenever they walk. From an NLP perspective, are those aweseome anchors or what? Everything a hot chick wears is a reminder of her sexuality and her 'sexyness.' What do we men wear to remind us that we're sexual beings?

Food for thought.

 

[greenlake]

great work man. i can see ur game started to flow smoothly again. this thread is interesting cause i'm in tampa too. i can picture all those places u've mention. sweetbay, target, walmart, barnes and noble.......they're on dale mabry, aren't they? if u're looking for a place fill with hot chicks then u should go to the target(behind chick fil-a) in waters. i'm serious.

do u go to HCC?

 

[Brak86]

another journal...YESSSS! Great job so far and I look forward to your progress.

 

[Zero Hero]

Good job with approaching. Your openers have non-sexual written all over them though. Work on that.

 

[Panik]

Ok, small FR today.

Got off my job at around 7:15 and decided to sarge for @ least one hour.

Guitar Center

Passed by Guitar Center and walked in. 0 targets. Met two guys who are into classical guitar (it's one of my hobbies) and who actually take it really seriously. Opened them (they were jamming the classical guitar room) and jammed with them for a while. They were really cool guys. We're probably going to hang out once a week and teach each other techniques (non-PUA techniques ) so @ least it wasn't a waste of time. I'm planning on improving my lifestyle, so that won't hurt.

Pearl Paints

Went to a Pearl Paints right next to it. I thought there should be @ least 1 or 2 HBs walking around there, but no luck---the store was closed!

if u're looking for a place fill with hot chicks then u should go to the target(behind chick fil-a) in waters. i'm serious.

Super Target

Decided to try SuperTarget. Walked around for about 40 mins...0 HBs. Maybe next time I should open random people and practice my skills with them---ONLY if there are no HBs though, wouldn't want to get relaxed...I did for a while and look at how I'm paying for it right now! I was about to leave when I realized I should at least talk to 1 woman who was somewhat attractive before leaving to have something to talk about here.

Found one near the freezers. Real blonde, 30something, blue eyes. Wish she were a MILF but she actually looked and acted like a spinster...I mean, what woman over 30 is by herself on Friday night shopping for food? Opened her with:

"Do you think it's better to buy the cookies from the bag or to bake my own with the pack from the freezer."

She took the bait and gave me a lesson about baking. Did you guys know you were supposed to cook them 25 degrees below what it says on the pack? I segwayed into some C&F and qualifying. "So, do you cook too?"

I was dressed in a suit so she started telling me I shouldn't shop hungry and maybe not work until so late and leave my wife alone for so long.

IOI! I was like "What 'you' doing here?" Her name is Mary, she works as a doctor's assistant. She was also working late. Somehow, I started joking about how I needed "Suggah Mammahs who could cook" (now I remember, she asked me if I was making enough $$$ @ least---since I was working until 'so late' so I asked her if she was the Gold Digger type). I could have kept on talking and probably # close her, but knowing that she was probably about my Mom's age and the fact that she wasn't hot at all, (pretty face, but bad body) totally turned me off. Conversation died down and eventually, she dissapeared. I noticed her checking me out as I was walking out of the store though. Still, not my type.

Notes: I've been taking my voice more consciously. I'm not choking as much, yet it can still be improved. Once I get the choking dealt with, I'm going to start concentrating on IMPROVING tonality and stuff. 0 anxiety whatsoever this time. I'm still not making as much eye contact as I should although more than a few days ago.

Too bad about ST tonight. Maybe next time.

BTW...Women are a lot like babies. Short attention span, but if you can keep them busy enough, you can basically do whatever you want with them.

Might go to the proverbial Wal-Mart (probably a Super Walmart) later on at night, but it's already 9 and since I've been out all day, the least I could do is study for my finals next week. Btw, it's like 40 degrees outside and just walking around sucks! Maan, Florida's supposed to be hot, not freezing! Oh, did I mention that I'm also whooped.

BTW--Since I'm still getting used to my job (i'm on my feet for 9 hours straight walking back and forth) and I still have exams to study for, I'm not hitting any clubs this week. Possibly next week. I don't really have anyone to go with here, but if I have to do it solo, I will---not the first time I do it.

Good job with approaching. Your openers have non-sexual written all over them though. Work on that.

Ditto. Lately, I've found indirect game to work the best for me, but hell, you only get one life so why not give DG a try. I'll keep that in the back of my mind dude.

Thx for the feedback guys.

 

[greenlake]

was that the one on dale mabry? dude....u went to the wrong target.

pearl paint and guitar center? is that on hilsborough? hahah, i was working out at bally's total fitness around that time.

i was at super walmart earlier......no hb. try westfield plaza tomorrow.

 

[Panik]

1:44 AM

All right. I cheated. Spent the night @ one of my FB's house. Did the nasty for a couple of hours then left, since I have work early tomorrow morning. It's funny, I was going to hook up my friend with her Stripper friend and he wouldn't believe it. She literally was going to drive up to his house and everything. His loss. He did have some place to go, though, so I suppose his priorities are set. That's always a good thing.

Super Wal-Mart

Decided to stop @ a SWM and get some munchies. Looked around the makeup isle and there was an HB7, Lauren. I hadn't looked in the mirror before I left my FBs house. I open L with some observational opener/opinion opener about why some guys should be allowed to wear makeup. I then DHV by quoting from the Robert Greene book about how women took makeup from men as a way to gain the upper hand on us or some other bull****. She eats it like hot cakes.

All of a sudden she asks me whether I'm high. I give her a C&F answer and subcommunicate the fact that I just got laid. She looks at me and is like "Did you just get laid?". I answer "I don't **** and tell..." <<BEING MORE SEXUAL>> then go on some tirade about how I hate it when people tell on other people and how I tell some chicks that, no matter how good I may be, I rather keep it 'our secret.' (thx Stephane) Of course, all of this was subcommunicated. Wouldn't want to sound try hard or desperate.

Especially since i just had sex and that usually makes me NOT desperate. I keep this up for like 5 minutes and decided to eject, since it's like 1 something and I need to get home. Turns out she's a Stripper. She told me she was a bartender, but well, I guess I should give her the benefit of the doubt. Nah, she's a stripper. Black hair, green eyes, somewhat overtanned skin + looks like she smokes but cute face and so so body. I did the mini walk out, turned around and was like "hey, next time I go shopping after 12:00 you can be my shopping buddy!" She gives me a big hug and starts laughing out.

I # closed her.

Notes: Fluid and smooth interaction. Still a little rough with my voice, but, well, the combination of being tired and satisfied did wonders. Not sure if I'm going to take it any further, but I'm sure she'll be a GREAT pivot.

Sarge on!

P.S. Has anyone noticed how looking at them as though they were a sizzling piece of steak actually gets them riled up?

 

[Panik]

Just got back from a 10 hour day and I'm tired as hell. Since I have finals next week, I'm just staying home and picking up on my studies. I also have other personal issues to take care of but next week, I'm definitely sarging since school is over.

 

[Panik]

12/12/06

Yesterday I had a pretty ****ty day. Stayed up till about 2 AM on Sunday night and spent Monday with 0 energy. On top of that, I ate a BK double whopper and that ****ed me up even more.

Have you guys ever noticed how after eating fast food, your mood tends to get worse? I was borderline depressive after eating that burger... Any correlations?

Today, I had to go to school to take care of some advising stuff, so, even though I'm on "exam mode" I managed to pull off some sarging.

Advising

I walked into the room and there were 4 girls there. This semester's 1itis (HB8), and 3 other chicks; 2HB5s and an HB7. I signed in and sat down.

While signing in, the girl behind the desk was like an HB8. I checked her out to the point where she smiled at me and blushed. Had life been like a porn movie, I would have probably ripped her clothes off and did her right there. Apparently, i was thinking outloud and when I realized it, she had already heard me say so. She giggled and took my application. I saw her talking to another chick while smiling and they were both looking at me. Yes, I'm a horny mother****er like that.

I go back to the waiting room. Obviously, no one was talking and there was so much tension in the room that you could almost cut it with a knife.

The 1itis ignored me for some friggin reason and I ignored her too.

I was in a sarging mood, so I started being myself and suddenly got the whole room talking. 5 minutes into it, I was getting IOIs from the HB5 and the HB7 (who I conveniently had sat next to). One of the HB5s got called in.

I kept it up and everyone was laughing. Basically, I was playing host.

All of a sudden the HB7 got called in. I was 'this' close to #closing her. The HB5 noticed this and was like "Hey, they're about to call me, I'd like you to come over my house some time and chill." She slips me her # and a screen name.

I get called in. When I walk out, i waited a bit for the HB7 to leave, but her stupid advisor got her to stay longer. I was in a hurry, so I had to leave #less. If I see her again (probably will, her ass is mine).

Advising 2

I went to another advisor. Got there late. Didn't matter, she wasn't there. Her secretary was EXTRA nice though (ever since I made it a rule to sarge EVERY woman I come into contact with, this phenomena has begun to happen more frequently) and basically gave me all the advising I needed. Plus the extra boost that IOIs from hot secretaries gives me.

I was walking out and saw a chick HB6 that used to go to my old job (food). Immediately I make her stand up and give me a hug. We talked for 5 mins and I went back to see if my advisor had returned.

I knew she was going to stay at the same place, so I did a mini take-away.

I came back and she was still there. Made some small talk and then asked her for her s/n. I've realized that it's easier to contact ppl through AIM than through the phone. She pulls out a piece of paper and writes something in it. A friend of hers comes in, says hi, notices what's happening and they both smile and blush. I say bye to her (another hug) and proceed to leave.

When I look at the paper, she had written her name, s/n, and # in it. Too bad she's leaving to another country next semester, otherwise, it would have been nice having her as a FB. I still have about 3 weeks to work on her though. (She's spending a few weeks out of the country for winter break and the next semester outside, yet, she's still a warm target). Really cute of her...she gets extra points.

Notes: My tonality has improved now that I'm consciously working on it. It pays to be relaxed and to keep the "i'm sarging" mentality out of your mind. Just vibe and be yourself. Again, relaxation is key. Both sarges were smooth, although #2 was kind of awkward. No need to smalltalk before you #close, especially if you know that you have rapport.

Got 2 finals left, so I'm not sure how the next few days are going to be.