Over 40's What do you do with your time off?

[englishman]

Not sure if this is for the 'anything else' forum or 'mature man' but it does pertain to dating.

Me 52 year old guy, not a fat b#stard and still in pretty good shape, hair still on head etc...

Question;
What do you guys do with your time off work? Weekends, evenings, holidays?

I seem to have serious problems about this. I even bought an e book, "What the most successful people do on the weekend"

I just seem to do the same thing year after year.

I live in a city, and I moved here from Europe 20 years ago.

I walk outside and I hardly ever see the same people, I can walk for 3 hours and see thousands of people and most times not know any of them.

My kid grew up and moved away and I have no family here nowadays at all.

My work life is successful, in as much as I have 2 business's, one a renovation business and the other a business that brings me into contact with people between ages 20 to 32.

The 20 to 32 year olds are here from other countries and seem to have a blast for the 6 to 12 months that they're here. Usually they arrive knowing no one, but as soon as they hit the international student scene they have friends and parties and a ball.

Occasionally they ask me to join them, and when I do I must say it's refreshing. But I'm a lot older and of course I'm not going to get any younger. So I can't really rely on that scene

I've been salsa dancing for years on and off, but honestly myself I find it's kinda dull! I'd even say a bit weird, all these people dancing close together, but try to have conversations with people and they often just seem to get all uptight.

They kind of remind me of Japanese women that have the stuffed arm to cuddle up to at night.... except I'm the stuffed arm.

http://www.amazon.com/Boyfriend-Pillow-Original-Companion-TRADEMARKED/dp/B002RWJ9S8

I looked around and tried to figure out is it me? But realistically I see people there perpetually single. In fact the majority seem that way.

I walked around the city the other weekend, the young people out having a blast, gay people have this huge scene, lesbians have their scene here to, but older hetro people? Next to nothing really.

My friends around my own age? They're in long term relationships and with women close to their own age. of the 3 close friends I have, 2 of them are pissed off half the time and the other is into 2 years with his girl and still happy with his lot.

So I'm kinda like.... what to do? I mean now fall is here, it's raining today and I had a fvcking boring weekend...AGAIN! I can go to they gym, but thats kinda dull. And there are a lot! of dark damp nights ahead before spring arrives again.

I've travelled sometimes in winter to far flung places. Some of my trips have been really great, others ho hum.... not really feeling like travelling this winter.

I got to know this young Chinese women I met on the beach. She had only been here for a week and I figured that pretty quickly she would get to know lots of people her own age, and sure enough she did and now theres pictures on FB of her having a great Saturday night out on the town.

I tried chatting up a youngish Japanese waitress a while back, but when I saw her yesterday she pretended her English wasn't very good! haha, but I know that from talking to her before that her English is excellent. It all gets a bit humiliating.

I think thats half the problem that I know all these young people and I end up being this older guy that they know, but I'm that older guy and they just don't hang around in the social sense.

I went out to meet a friend 2 weeks ago, his girlfriends sister was in town and he told me she was pretty hot, long story short she ended up back at my place and within 10 minutes of getting through the door she was on her knees giving me a bj, so I don't know... I have these successes and failures but I just wish there were a few more successes... that way the 'winner effect' might kick in.

At the moment I fell I have the moderately successful effect and it's not the same :rock:

Anyway I'm rambling, so off to the gym.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Englishman,
Well you can certainly reflect back on a great time in the Philippines...After that sort of thing life becomes an anticlimax...I have a Croatian Builder Friend....He and his Son take it in turns to visit Cambodia or Laos for three months every year....While one is away the other looks after the business,they have a crazy time over there,select a really nice young Woman say around 28-32 bring her back to Australia for six months,so they always have someone around to cook meals clean the House... After packing her off home after six months they run the business ....Some of these Women are beautiful,demure and quite charming...sure in a way they are Ladies of simple virtue,but the attitude in Bhuddist societies is just different...One thing is certain,neither Ivan nor Tomas will be writing in to SS asking how to spend their time LOL.

 

[Prime_Beef]

Dunno if on topic but..

I do a lot of riding. .mostly Western states, preferably dirt, have a couple rv's to camp. These days a big time xr fan, Harley stuff as well.
I find it keeps me relaxed and I concentrate on making money better, with a purpose for it. (I own rental real estate) Took many a chick camping and riding. One of the best ways to test 'em. Meeting women's never been a problem, vetting them..takes time.

I find people with dedicated hobbies are more settled, better balanced. Wish I could get the foto up without a link.

Fwiw, been happily married 8 yrs to a Cambodian American, met her here in the US Scaramouch. .

 

[englishman]

Dear Englishman,
Well you can certainly reflect back on a great time in the Philippines...After that sort of thing life becomes an anticlimax...I have a Croatian Builder Friend....He and his Son take it in turns to visit Cambodia or Laos for three months every year....While one is away the other looks after the business,they have a crazy time over there,select a really nice young Woman say around 28-32 bring her back to Australia for six months,so they always have someone around to cook meals clean the House... After packing her off home after six months they run the business ....Some of these Women are beautiful,demure and quite charming...sure in a way they are Ladies of simple virtue,but the attitude in Bhuddist societies is just different...One thing is certain,neither Ivan nor Tomas will be writing in to SS asking how to spend their time LOL.

Thanks! I had a laugh at that Yes the Philippines !!! you remember that story. lol

I went to Cambodia one time about 8 years ago... I met this bird in a night club called the Heart of Darkness in Phnom Pen , she got us a motorbike taxi and back to this hotel that I figured she couldn't afford.
When we went in to her room there was a picture of this American white dude playing baseball.
I said who the hell is that? She said he's my boyfriend, but dont worry he's in Singapore working at the moment.
I probably should of left but I stayed the night.
I would have to say that of all the women I've slept with in my life she was one of the most memorable. And in a good way.

Yes, I think I have to go travel again. I always drag my heels about it, moan on for about a month and then finally get myself to get a plane ticket.

This next trip I think I'll go to see friends in Korea and Japan, and if I can muster the enthusiasm I might fly from there to Thailand and hang out in Chiang Mai for a while. Or not, maybe just Korea Japan is enough for one trip.

 

[englishman]

I do a lot of riding. .mostly Western states, preferably dirt, have a couple rv's to camp. These days a big time xr fan, Harley stuff as well.
I find it keeps me relaxed and I concentrate on making money better, with a purpose for it. (I own rental real estate) Took many a chick camping and riding. One of the best ways to test 'em. Meeting women's never been a problem, vetting them..takes time.

I find people with dedicated hobbies are more settled, better balanced. Wish I could get the foto up without a link.

Fwiw, been happily married 8 yrs to a Cambodian American, met her here in the US Scaramouch. .

Hey that' a great set up! It's worth the hard work if you have something like that to show for it. I've been thinking about getting a camper myself. I drove my work van from Canada to Mexico 2 years back. A long drive but I went with 2 young Korean women I know, and it was a good trip down the coast.
I also bought real estate to and rent it out. I need a hobby, that's something I figured out. For me it's music and travel, too much time in the city and I get a bit nuts.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Prime Beef and Englishman,
I am also a Camper van person,soo cheap in this Country very safe too,went almost to Cape York in my old Transit Van,payed for about four nights camping in nine weeks...they are soo good,I would find car Parks,churches,TV Repeater stations,never got hassled once...Also did 13 Weeks in Southern Africa again cheap as chips...Funnily enough I have been deriving My principal income from Real Estate since a boy of 23 when I finished my first House...as a renovator or Builder any cash you get for additions to contract,and piles of material can be rerouted into your own property which in this Country if you make your principal place of residence attracts zero Tax...A great way to make millions!

 

[ChrisFloyd]

Find something to do.

Don't like it, find something else.

Can't find anything, do nothing.

Tired of doing nothing, find something to do.

Then you always have thing to do.

Until you die.

 

[Warrior74]

I'm poor and 40. I work on film projects with friends, I take photographs, I work on my business. I read books on marketing and philosophy. I smoke a little herb and go for a walk in the park or the woods. If I have a few bucks I'll try to catch a movie, but mostly I stick to things that don't cost me any money.

 

[Prime_Beef]

https://farm4.staticflickr.com/3914/14576916809_f4df0c1e6a_z.jpg

Gotta van too! Has a shi**er, shower, stove, heat. Van camping lots of fun, and you meet a different group of people than with a larger rv.

Scaramouche, you know how to make a small fortune in commercial real estate?
Start off with a large one!

I was humbled during the crash in 09, but there's still a substantial amount left, and coming back. Will retire and perhaps walk away at 55 or so..soon. 48 now. Never enjoyed foreign travel much, because in my youth I went out to the garden spots as a soldier. My contact with the locals was not as a tourist. Down under has its appeal though. .

Warrior and others, secret to wealth is leverage. Secret to figuring out what leverage is for you is peace and quiet to concentrate. Secret to concentration is a mind at ease due to satisfying, engrossing hobbies...

 

[speed dawg]

One other thing, though: whoever came up with the word "workaholic" is probably a woman, because in my opinion, most "successful" men work a lot, even on the weekends. They work on THEIR terms, not 9-5 Monday through Friday.

People who label others as workaholics are jealous haters who wonder why other people are working as much as they do WILLINGLY. How do I know, you ask? Because I'm one of them, except I'm more of an admirer of those guys than a hater. In my current job, I can't wait to get to the weekend so I can just do nothing and have no stress. I wish I could just work out, play golf, drink whiskey and watch TV personally. So, when I see guys out there that are working their asses off and making tons of money, naturally it makes me ask myself what they are seeing that I don't? What motivates them but doesn't motivate me? And it can't just be, "They work hard". Life is WAY too short to slave away doing something you don't love just for the off chance you'll hit it big one day.

 

[speed dawg]

OP, I'm not over 40, but I tend to think I act like I am.

The only thing I know right now that I would enjoy is to sell off my house and all the other useless sh*t I have and buy a motor home. Then I could go wherever I wanted. Unfortunately I'm still trying to make money and raise kids so that's not an option for me until I'm in my 50s at minimum. Obviously I'd like to have a homestead somewhere, but honestly, I could just buy a cheap condo then have a little land, and be done with it. What's the big deal with a house anyway, that you continuously dump money into? It's smart while you're young, because you can make big money, but not when you're older unless you just want to pass it on to your kids.

I like to play golf, watch TV and hike in the mountains. Go swimming in the summer. Grill and eat. Work out. Read books, but only interesting ones. I can do all these things without a house.

 

[Cejay]

I agree with the others comments about workaholics. I tend to work a lot, and its nice to spin plates and not hear someone complaining about I spend my time.

I have a couple motorcycles, ride on and off road as much as I can. (This motivated my move to AZ)

I read a lot, write a bit, drink more beer then I should.

I study martial arts, plan to take up some racket sports shortly and travel a little less.

I spend a lot of time chasing tail, though I should cut that back in favour of more education.

I'm going to use meetup to meet new friends and do other things. I love paintball.

I've traveled tons for work, travel is very over rated. The airlines continue to find new ways to remove anything pleasurable from air travel and nickel and dime your a$$.

CJ.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Ceejay,
Mate beware Racquet Sports at your age,apart from laying a good foundation for chronic shoulder and wrist injuries,You are inevitably going to bvgger your knees and ankles...Hip replacements are a piece of cake,but from seeing those around me in the Orthopaedic Ward when I had mine resurfaced,Knees are no laughing matter...most of the guys in my ward with knee problems were Ex Squash players or skiers

 

[Rubirosa]

I really just like banging different women, cooking, and reading.

However, I do Martial Arts to keep my body fit (So I can bang different women). I am not a natural bada$$, but at least I know I can fight if I have to....

I pick up the guitar when the mood hits ( I was in bands during my 20's, 30's....I was pretty good....) However, I can now go for weeks without looking at a guitar

I sometimes go to car and motorcycle shows

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Rubirosa,
You old Rogue, Like the Cat you are back...nice to see you posting again....how many Birds are you banging at the moment?...I am down to two regulars,a couple of once a monthers and sundry loose ends who I meet now and then,sweeter for the meeting though LOL.

 

[Mr.Positive]

I'm definitely a "time off" person. I work extremely hard for 7 days in a row, then I have 7 days off. Day for day schedule, and love it.

What I do is slow the pace of life down, and just enjoy it. I am too a camper van/rv person, and have been taking quite a few trips. Nice setup there, Prime Beef. There is always something to do, a new place to see or experience, or even if that something is relaxing on the beach. Recently, I have been taking a small boat out in the ocean fishing.

OP, if you live near a coast, check out kayak fishing. Guys mount fish finders on their kayaks, paddle out to catch fish. Exciting, good exercise, and who can complain about fresh fish on the grill?

Most of my hobbies are water related. I don't make a schedule to keep on my time off. I live each day for what it is and the moment.

 

[MaddXMan]

Time off is great! I ride my bike, walk the dog, build German and Russian WW2 models, joined a biweekly movie club and made new friends, go see bands in a bar and get totally loaded, met a woman on Tinder who has a metal detector so research places to hunt treasure - instead of a date we are bushwhacking and digging. It's fun. At 46 I'm enjoying my "time off" now more than ever.

 

[Cejay]

Scaramouche,

Good warning. I hadn't thought about that.

I like mountain biking and weightlifting, I will try that and maybe some classes at the gym instead.



OP & Other Posters,

Great thread. I need more ideas for things to try & do. Its this type of discussion that has me really appreciating this forum.

CJ.

 

[Rubirosa]

Dear Rubirosa,
You old Rogue, Like the Cat you are back...nice to see you posting again....how many Birds are you banging at the moment?...I am down to two regulars,a couple of once a monthers and sundry loose ends who I meet now and then,sweeter for the meeting though LOL.

Hey !!! How's my friend doing?

To answer your question..........ONE, believe it or not! Yes, I dropped my five plates to spend time with this one, one of the reasons being is that she is very wealthy and spends lots of $ on me...ha ha...I can't believe I'm living like my namesake. However, I miss the old life, and I'm not exactly poor myself, so I see it being just a matter of time before I'm back in the saddle and enjoying a variety of Asian cultures

 

[englishman]

I'm meeting up with a couple of young Asian women I know tomorrow to plan a road trip to the Rockies in November.
Things like that make me feel like I'm spending my time well. Reading a book, it's all good.
It's the time wasting farting around stuff that gets me pizsed off... sat at home drinking a beer and bagged from working that I'm not into.
Thats actually what I'm doing tonight, but then again I made a sh1t load of money working and getting tired. So in a way it's all good.
It's a cliche but it's a bit of a balancing act.