Open Relationships

[Bokanovsky]

Your wife can use this against you legally in the future.

You have kids?

Many jurisdictions have “no fault” divorce laws these days. Infidelity would be of no legal consequence.

 

[RangerMIke]

The only time I've seen 'open' relationships sort of work is when you have a married couple that are just basically roommates with ZERO romantic interest anymore... they have children off at college, or no kids, and getting divorced that late in life is just stupid. They have separate bedrooms and their own lives.

The key is that the 'couple' no longer have any romantic interest in each other. I have a couple of friends that are like this.... they pretty much just hook up with other 'couples' that are like them.

 

[BadBoy89]

My wife and I have done the swinging thing in the past. She is no longer interested in other people for the most part but allows me to explore that on my own. She is bi and gets off on me being with other women.

“Dear, I know we used to swing with other people, but being 40 years old I’m not interested in that anymore. Yet you.being 40 and having kids with me, have my full permission to explore other females, married or single, on your own. I don’t mind at all.”

“I know I gave birth to kids but I also like sleeping with women. So you if want to bring one of those hot women home so I can watch you f*ck her and then join you guys, it would be my pleasure. Just make sure she is not a screamer while you or I f*ck her because it may wake up the kids.”

Rock on!

 

[derby1]

Women are better at short term monogamous relationships under 5 years

As a relative of a counsellor in the UK, this is not true, Short term relationships destroy women...

my 75 year old mom has more joy in her face and eyes than your average 35 year old, plus my moms facial muscles react 10x quicker too happiness/laughter.

modern women are dead inside

 

[SW15]

Short term relationships destroy women...

modern women are dead inside

We both perceive that women are more suited towards monogamous relationships. I was stating Caleb Jones' idea that women are more suited to monogamy but in a shorter setting. Women are the ones who tend to end longer relationships that have resulted in marriage. Women file for divorce most of the time. Women are often filing for divorce because they are bored of the current situation, which would indicate a tendency towards shorter term monogamy. I have not seen statistics about whether men or women end non-marital relationships more often. I would think it would be women as well due to thirst among betas.

The median length of a marriage ending in divorce in the United States is 7 years. If you factor in pre-marital relationship time, you're typically looking at a 10 year long relationship failing. If a marital relationship officially fails at 10 years, it was likely dead 2-3 years before the actual divorce filing. A lot of relationships, even bad ones, last longer than one would logically think they would last.

The only time I've seen 'open' relationships sort of work is when you have a married couple that are just basically roommates with ZERO romantic interest anymore... they have children off at college, or no kids, and getting divorced that late in life is just stupid. They have separate bedrooms and their own lives.

The key is that the 'couple' no longer have any romantic interest in each other. I have a couple of friends that are like this.... they pretty much just hook up with other 'couples' that are like them.

I think this idea makes sense.

Do you think married couples with children still under 18 who are roommates with ZERO romantic interest anymore would stay married but in an open marriage solely to keep the household together until the kids turn 18? I think it can happen but I think in that situation, the more common occurrence is divorce. Children under 18 who experience a divorce experience trauma. However, it isn't healthy for children under 18 to see their parents drifting through a loveless partnership and possibly having sex with extramarital partners.

At what point is a divorce "too late in life"?

 

[darksprezzatura]

I don't really understand the difference between all these labels open relationship and spinning plates, polygamy etc

Does an open relationship mean you are "emotionally committed" to her or what is that about?

 

[Redwolf]

Probably keeps the spark going better than straight-up monogamy, which from what I've seen isn't tenable. But a lot of guys on Sosuave pine for monogamy - the idealization of love we keep hearing about.

We have found iy does keep things exciting. Variety in a relationship can be very good.

 

[devilkingx2]

I don't really understand the difference between all these labels open relationship and spinning plates, polygamy etc

Does an open relationship mean you are "emotionally committed" to her or what is that about?

As I understand it:

Open relationship = you and your girlfriend are officially together but allow each other to hook up on the side

Spinning plates = no official girlfriends, you just have a bunch of side girls/FWBs

Polyamorous = you have two girlfriends, or your girlfriend also has her own girlfriend or it's like a threeway relationship where your two girlfriends are also dating each other, etc.

 

[darksprezzatura]

As I understand it:

Open relationship = you and your girlfriend are officially together but allow each other to hook up on the side

Spinning plates = no official girlfriends, you just have a bunch of side girls/FWBs

Polyamorous = you have two girlfriends, or your girlfriend also has her own girlfriend or it's like a threeway relationship where your two girlfriends are also dating each other, etc.

yeah..."officially together", I guess I'll never really understand labels and I'm realising i probably don't want to.

It's a rabbit hole lol

 

[Redwolf]

As I understand it:

Open relationship = you and your girlfriend are officially together but allow each other to hook up on the side

Spinning plates = no official girlfriends, you just have a bunch of side girls/FWBs

Polyamorous = you have two girlfriends, or your girlfriend also has her own girlfriend or it's like a threeway relationship where your two girlfriends are also dating each other, etc.

This is correct. My wife and I really don't put a label on it. It's been different things at different times depending on what we want.