Online Dating. What are your real opinions

[mahon83050]

I have done it in the past, but still feel a sense of shame about it. If you meet a girl you really like online, I would still be embarrased to tell others how we met.

 

[DJ4Real]

In the middle.

 

[Shiftkey]

I've tried it on and off. I've met 3 women from dating sites, all of whome looked worse than their pictures and didn't last farther than the first meeting. Overall I see nothing wrong with online dating as long as you meet the person after a few emails and you don't depend on it as your only way of meeting women. However, in my experience the quality isn't that great for my age range and area.

But I haven't tried myspace yet, and I've heard positive results from there.

 

[Deep Dish]

This year alone I have met 30 people from the Internet. 2005 has been a banner year for me in such that this year I have met many more people from the Internet than in all previous years combined. The vast majority of the people I have met (this year) were through a local website devoted to the local music scene and while most have been guys, a good handful have been ladies. Aside from the music website, I had a date with a girl from adultfriendfinder.com while I was on a vacation, and I met two ladies from a porn site. And just a few weeks ago while I was at a concert, a hot chick went up to me already knowing my name and knowing who I was, having seen me on myspace.com and having seen we shared a mutual friend (who I had also met from the Net).

I have had nothing but positive experiences in meeting people from the Internet. There is nothing to be ashamed. It is more acceptable now than ever to meet people from the Internet and it’s accepted that many otherwise socially competent people have a hard time meeting people because of long work hours or, in my case, common interests.

Shiftkey:
Overall I see nothing wrong with online dating as long as you meet the person after a few emails and you don’t depend on it as your only way of meeting women.

I totally agree.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

This has been talked about to death, the bulk of guys either feel:

1. Online dating is for looses either because they had gotten burned online or have never actually tried it (can not conceive of any mediums for meeting people other than what they are comfortable with).
2. Guys who are not ashamed because they either see it as a learning experience or already know how to be successful online and have figured out how to make it work.
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   The ones who don't have an opinion will probably wait until the other two groups fight it out and will decide to side with the winner.

 

[Silverback82]

do you guys think that online dating attracts attention *****s just looking for random guys to email her so she gets an ego boost?

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by Silverback82
do you guys think that online dating attracts attention *****s just looking for random guys to email her so she gets an ego boost?

Absolutely, without a doubt. But only guys without any type of qualifying skills fall for that BS. Those guys are as bad as those women; THEY are trading emails with these women for weeks at a time because these women are giving them attention which boosts their ego too!

Think about it....

 

[penkitten]

depends on the people and the site you find them on.

 

[Bonhomme]

middle of the road

Great for some people, just not for me.

It just doesn't play to my particular strengths, i.e., how I carry myself, eye contact, sense of style, and above all, kino. All those are "in person" things.

 

[Shiftkey]

Re: middle of the road

Originally posted by Bonhomme
Great for some people, just not for me.

It just doesn't play to my particular strengths, i.e., how I carry myself, eye contact, sense of style, and above all, kino. All those are "in person" things.

You still use all of those strengths. It's not like the entire relationship happens on the Internet. You send a few emails and the rest uses all of those "in person" skills when you first meet.

The first meeting is not even a real first date. The best analogy is like approaching someone you go to school with, but don't know. You're already aware of each other, so it's not quite like a cold approach, but you don't know sh1t about each other.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Re: Re: middle of the road

Originally posted by Shiftkey
You still use all of those strengths. It's not like the entire relationship happens on the Internet. You send a few emails and the rest uses all of those "in person" skills when you first meet.

The first meeting is not even a real first date. The best analogy is like approaching someone you go to school with, but don't know. You're already aware of each other, so it's not quite like a cold approach, but you don't know sh1t about each other.

Online sarging consists of only three simple steps:
(And no, it's not all done at once for those naysayers that were going to say "Yeah but..." )

1. Get the women's attention
2. Qualify them
3. Initiate the first meeting
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   That's it.

 

[splinterkb]

Its short and simple. Online dating is for chumps who cant pick up women in real life.

 

[Bonhomme]

You still use all of those strengths. It's not like the entire relationship happens on the Internet.

That's the thing: in my case, it almost always has (chuckling mirthlessly). See typical stats below.

Somehow, in person, eye contact, charisma, and kino can obliterate things (mostly matters of "laundry list" incompatibility) that have almost always derailed online contacts before step 3 ("Arrange First Meeting"). And those few times an online contact got past that to actually meeting, the essential chemistry just wasn't there.

Meeting in real life establishes the chemistry first, and those petty little "laundry list" items all of a sudden don't look so important.

For example, I'm a very carnivorous and non-religious hardcore non-smoker, and I've had some of my best relationships with vegetarians, smokers (many of whom quit while dating me), and one quite religious Christian gal (who also happened to be a smoker when we met). But they had other essential points of compatibility, not to mention mad chemistry. These relationships wouldn't have got to the first email online.

My typical stats for a similar time period for online "dating" vs. meetings in person:

Online: receive 10 messages, qualify 0 of them (mostly desperate women or Russians); send 20 emails, get 15 return emails (not bad, I grant), exchange an email or two with them, 7 or 8 disappear after I request phone #, 4 just ignore the phone # request and send another email, exchange phone #s with 3 or 4, arrange 1 meeting, 0 overnighters or 2nd dates.

In person meeting: 8 phone #s, meet 5, 2 dates turn into overnighters, after which more dates or relationships follow, 1 other good non-overnight date that leads to a similarly good 2nd date.

Which looks more efficient and productive to you?

*********

Deep Dish is right: myspace is killer for guys who are in bands. It's groupie heaven all the way. If I get a band going, I'll play it for all it's worth.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by splinterkb
Its short and simple. Online dating is for chumps who cant pick up women in real life.

There you have it, right from the horse's mouth.

 

[Paintballguy]

I've decided that online dating is retarded. There is seriously no point to even trying because all the girls are a bunch of attention *****s getting their ego's boosted by afc's. /rant

 

[Silverback82]

Originally posted by Paintballguy
I've decided that online dating is retarded. There is seriously no point to even trying because all the girls are a bunch of attention *****s getting their ego's boosted by afc's. /rant

yeah that's what i'm starting to think

I read profiles on yahoo and match.com and I noticed that alot of girls don't even describe their match at all. That's when you know they are an attention ***** because everybody has standards. They just want random guys to email them for an ego boost. Unless they really are willing to date guys as short as 3'0, are overweight and as old as 70

 

[Shiftkey]

There's no more AWs online than there are in the field.

 

[diplomatic_lies]

I don't recommend online dating if you're young (unless your friends are really liberal about things). Otherwise if you're looking for a LTR, it becomes really awkward when your friends ask, "So where did you guys meet?"

Of course, this doesn't apply to the nerd generation (anyone under the age of 17) who spends 90% of their time online and write things like "i lik u wil u mry me".

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by diplomatic_lies
I don't recommend online dating if you're young (unless your friends are really liberal about things). Otherwise if you're looking for a LTR, it becomes really awkward when your friends ask, "So where did you guys meet?"

Why would that be awkward? It's a great opening for some kick @ss stories!

 

[penkitten]

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
Why would that be awkward? It's a great opening for some kick @ss stories!

it sure is!
gio and i met here for pete's sake, boy dont we get some funny looks when people hear our story.