Oneitis SUCKS

[WestCoaster]

Soulmate is concocted by culture

There are millions of people in this world whom you could marry and be happy. It's a matter of timing -- whether you meet the person, whether both people are ready to be married -- and location -- your parents would not have married had they not been in the same location. If they didn't marry, they would've met someone else and probably married someone else.

There are no cosmic forces and "soul mates" here, just a heckuva lot of practicality going on.

Newsflash: When you get married, you're not going to be mushy-gushy and starry eyed your entire life. Find a quality woman with a warm heart, who is tough when things get rough and can survive the ups and downs of life and isn't a drama queen.

In today's U.S.A. world, that would be one woman out of every 200 with that above description.

Soul mate, like three-months-salary-for-a-ring, etc., is made up by Hollywood/U.S. culture. The term soul mate didn't even appear till about the late 80's.

Quit being brainwashed by society and the media.

 

[wheelin&dealin]

Originally posted by RobLB
Thats exactly why I said if you have any doubt at all and your not 100% sure then don't get married. And I wouldn't put the number at 99%. There are alot of people that are happily married but there are alot more that are not. Marriage is something that you have to work at to make it last. Have you ever been married?? You can't just say "I do" and think it will last. Thats why if your not 100% sure before you do it your not going to put 100% in a marriage to make it last. Thats why I think the older you are the wiser you are to making decisions about marriage. So many young people are getting married these days before they have time to enjoy life. I think the marrying age should be around 30 years old, but then again this is just my opinion...

I completely agree with you here though..

 

[ketostix]

Isn't it mind-boggling yet true that a girl will chase your validation for months only to dump you and lose all interest the moment after you give it to her?

I agree that a soul-mate is mostly BS, but the closest thing to it would be a girl that is really interested in being with you and isn't just chasing your validation or something non-related to just being with you long-term. So is validating her and she sticks around a good test or do you guys just never really validate her?

 

[RobLB]

Originally posted by ketostix
Isn't it mind-boggling yet true that a girl will chase your validation for months only to dump you and lose all interest the moment after you give it to her?

Probably the most popular question here. It's basically the ole push-pull concept. Whoever the person that is chasing is usually the pusher and the other pulls away. Then when the puller starts pushing back the pusher becomes the puller. It's when you find a happy medium (nuetral) that it becomes a stable relationship. I guess what I'm saying is that a girl doesn't like to be pushed and once they know they have changed the balance of a relationship they bail out!!