I never thought I could ever like a girl personality wise, but guess what, I do. I know I could get a better looking girl, and sooner or later, i'm gonna want to move on, but my problem, I can't. I kno that if I break up with her, shes gonna be so upset at me, and that will only make me more upset. It would be like losing my best frekin friend and having her completely turn on me and hate me, and I just wouldn't want to face that becuase its gonna hurt too much and I don't know if I can get over it. Basicaly, I want to stay friends with my gf and be able to just tell her I want to move on with no harsh feelings. That feels impossible and I got no clue to what i'm going to do.
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Oneitis For A Girls Personality
- Thread starter SexinEar
- Start date
This is exactly my situation bro, except maybe my girl looks better than yours
I've been with mines for 6+ months and have the same feelings as you and let me tell you something that maybe will interest you...I actually 'tried' to break up with my girl this past saturday. I didn't bullshvt her and say, 'its not you its me' and all that crap, i basically told her that realistically we probably wouldn't work out because i'm younger and she's older and I want to experience more things in my life before I settle down for the 2nd stage of my life (marriage, kids)
I had the same fears as you that she'd just want to cut communication and hate me, but surprisingly (probably because my girl is very mature and oldeR) she didn't act out or get very angry or hate me, she said she understood and was sad, but she realized that its going to be hard and with me being young I'd want something new after a while... She almost said she'd wait for me, but cut short... she was VERY understanding bro, not to say that yous is going to be tho...
Turns out she was sooo understanding, I took back my break-up haha and told her I wanted to stay. I actually have MORE feelings for her now that i was so close to losing her... i love the girl and couldn't stand to lose her
One word of warning tho, that if your girl is immature and young she probably will end up hating you for the rest of life... my ex-gf whom i loved and broke up with still hates me, can't even be friendly... just HATES me its crazy... So be ready for that, u can't break someones heart and expect them to say... "no big deal call me tommorow" u either have one or the other
-Cod3r
MacDiddy
Master Don Juan
you can't stay friends.... OK!!!
If she's an UG, then I suggest you break up with her for the sake of your off-springs... think of them... do you want to bring them up in a world that values beauty above all else...
Do it for the children!!!!
If she's an UG, then I suggest you break up with her for the sake of your off-springs... think of them... do you want to bring them up in a world that values beauty above all else...
Do it for the children!!!!
SexinEar said:
SORRY BUT I HAVE TO ALL CAPS THIS.....
DUDE..BREAK UP WITH HER!!!!!! HOT OR NOT...WHEN U GET THE FEELING WHERE UR UNSURE..BREAK UP WITH HER NO MATTER WHAT OR HOW U FEEL. EXPECT TO FEEL LIKE **** AND SAD THE FIRST FEW DAYS OR WEEKS (DEPENDING HOW AFC U ARE) BUT DUDE...TRUST ME .....JUST DO IT!
I WAS ONCE IN A SITUATION LIKE URS...WELL..MY GIRL WAS HOT THOUGH..MODEL..ETC. BUT I JUST..DIDNT FEEL LIKE I REALLY REALLY REALLY LIKED HER ANYMORE. SO I TRIED BREAKING UP..BUT SHE GAVE ME THIS PUPPY FACE..AND TOLD ME THAT SHES NOT LETTING ME GO..BLLLALBALBA....SO I STAYED....I TRIED THIS AGAIN......AND STAYED.....
EVENTUALLY....AFTER 8 MONTHS OF TRYING TO BREAK UP WITH HER.....SHE LEFT ME. SHE SAID THE SPARK IS GONE..BLA BLA BLA BLA
WER STILL FRIENDS NOW..BUT ONE THING I LEARNED WAS....IT WAS MY FAULT. I WAS AN AFC TO HER. IT WAS CLEAR THAT NO MATTER WHAT I SAID...SHE WAS STILL IN CONTROL. DID SHE DO THIS ON PURPOSE?? NO! DID SHE MEAN WHAT SHE SAID WHEN SHE TOLD ME TO STAY?? YES! MOST PROBRABLY...BUT ITS THE ACTIONS I DID...THAT MADE HER LOSE RESPECT...SO DUDE....LEAVE HER...OR ULL BE LEFT
It just feels like, if I do get a better looking girl, theres always gonna be something missing. It really does boil down to personality I hate to admit it but it kinda does. When shes pissed off, i'm pissed off, so i'm gonna be a wreck when i dump her and say i want to move on. This is a girl that knows me better than my mom and she is soo afc and clingly to me, i just dont kno how i'm gonna deal with this. It would just feel like all the time i spent with her and hours on the phone are all a total waste and completely pointless because she'll hate my guts.
thats proubly the best thing that can happen to me.drumerdud said:
when i wrote that post i just got home from being with her and my mind was compleatley jaded. maybe shes losing intrest too, i really dont know. I will have to dump her soon no matter what, but maybe i don't have oneitis for her personality. I was in the moment, and maybe, no definatley, all pvssy is the same.
MacDiddy
Master Don Juan
You deserved to be dumped....
given your rant, she probably could do better...
given your rant, she probably could do better...
If you want to talk, talk to your friends. If you want a girl to like you, listen to her, ask questions, and act like you are on the edge of your seat.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.
MacDiddy
Master Don Juan
Given what you've written... that time has come!!!
you are fighting nature by going out with an UG when you know you can do better... Is she some sort of nympho in bed?
I'm in the same boat. I have ONEitis for a girl's personality (although I wouldnt say she isnt attractive). There are some women who can treat a guy well but their looks sorta isnt stunning.
Sometimes you can stay friends. It depends on the strength of the relationship to begin with.
Sometimes you can stay friends. It depends on the strength of the relationship to begin with.
I have never been able to understand why some guys have girlfriends who are unattractive in their physical appearance.
Never in my life have I dated a girl who wasn't at least a HB7 in her looks and I never will do it in the future either.
In saying this I have spent many days, weeks, and months in succession without a girlfriend, yet I have never been with an unattractive woman.
When I meet a girl I immediately know if I am attracted to her enough for her to become my girlfriend or not at a later date.
I have many unattractive female friends, but friends is what they are and it always stays this way, regardless of if I can find a pretty girl to go out with me or not, many of these ladies become upset with me when I continue to resist their advances, but I only like to date the prettiest 30% of the girls whom I meet.
It isn't fair I don't think to become involved with a girl whom you don't desire and whom you are going to eventually hurt, it is better to be fussy like me and only ever date the girls whom you feel are pretty enough for you to want to be with, but there are many who think I am too fussy.
Never in my life have I dated a girl who wasn't at least a HB7 in her looks and I never will do it in the future either.
In saying this I have spent many days, weeks, and months in succession without a girlfriend, yet I have never been with an unattractive woman.
When I meet a girl I immediately know if I am attracted to her enough for her to become my girlfriend or not at a later date.
I have many unattractive female friends, but friends is what they are and it always stays this way, regardless of if I can find a pretty girl to go out with me or not, many of these ladies become upset with me when I continue to resist their advances, but I only like to date the prettiest 30% of the girls whom I meet.
It isn't fair I don't think to become involved with a girl whom you don't desire and whom you are going to eventually hurt, it is better to be fussy like me and only ever date the girls whom you feel are pretty enough for you to want to be with, but there are many who think I am too fussy.
Call_Me_Daddy
Master Don Juan
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It's a self-esteem issue. I know it firsthand. I was with this HB4 for a bit... at the time I didn't know what I was doing. I was lonely so I was with her for a few months. (not proud of it, but it happened)KoalaKing said:
Then I found the problem. I didn't think much of myself. I didn't think I could get the hot b*tches. Even though I am a fairly charismatic and good looking guy, I knew it, I saw it. But I didn't believe it. I didn't think that I was worthy of having such an "awsome" person around me.
Then I wised up and cut any connection with her. Then the problem just took care of itself and I started on the road to self-improvement and seeing the b*tches for what they REALLY are.