OMFG!!!! Girl who showed OBVIOUS interest COMPLETELY DISSED ME!!! WTF!!!

[ezily]

Yeah I actually don't think you waited too long. The reason I say this is because you live right next to her. Therefore it might not be considered proper to ask for her number right away. In order to get a girl not to flake, you need to get her attraction (which I think you did) and get her number in a proper setting (which you did NOT). DJs know when to get a girl's number. If you won't likely see her again (i.e. day game), if you have a good connection/vibe and you think she's up for it, etc. A good DJ knows who to ask but also and very importantly when to ask.

I kinda have this dilemma sometimes as well with where I work. The reason being because it may not be kosher to get a girls number while I'm at work and second because it might be weird as I didn't really approach. But, if I see the same girl who I get good vibes from outside of work then I do get a number, situation permitting (i.e. she doesn't have a bf, etc.)

You asked for her number in front of another guy?! Why in the hell would you do that? You don't know that they are just friends. They could be having sex right now. You should have waited until you got her alone.

Also, I like how you don't read into the fact that she has many different guys over to her place. That's a good mindset. I mean a negative person would think she's a huge slut and he wouldn't want to date a wh*re. You on the other hand don't think that way. Just thought I'd let you know that I admire your view about that situation in particular.

 

[DonGorgon]

Hi Guys,

I disagree on the hesitation thing...

Reason why?

I HESITATED because she lives practically NEXT DOOR TO ME!

I think I had every reason to hesitate.

It was NOT a sign of weakness, but rather, me deciding if I wanted to get "involved" with a chick who not only lives in my building, but ALSO lives 2doors down.

Within a day or so of this girl mentioning "wine", I knocked on her door to see what was up, and ask her out or ask her over (for a drink).

She was sick as a dog when I came by, and rather than having her being in a sick, bad, uncomfortable, unsexy mood when I close (where there was LESS of a chance of her accepting), I decided to wait or ask her out when I caught her in a good mood.

The next couple of times I saw her she was with a "friend", so again asking her out or # closing was not something I considered.

I do agree I left it a bit long (waiting for the right opportunity), which is why I went ahead and did yesterday, regardless of her company.

As far as oneities goes...

I will agree I "analysis" things alot. I tend to do this in many aspects of my life. There are a few signs of things I DON'T like about her anyway.

Will I call her...probably not...if I run into her again I'll see what the vibe is...

Try telling her that and see what she says.. See if she thinks that logic is a turn on...

 

[ezily]

Oh but I don't think you should call her anytime soon. She lives right next door to you. Chances are you'll see her again pretty soon. Just see what vibe you get and see if you can set up a date right there. Screw the phone.

But don't go over-analyzing stuff about how you got her number. You made a mistake in how you got it, not when you got it. Just move on from this point. She gave you her number. She lives right next door.

Please, just don't give her the impression that you're some creepy stalker though. That would be very very bad, especially since you live next to her.

 

[Tantric]

okay...so I did not get her number at the right time...agreed.

I messed that up.

I am not going to call her or do anything. I'll chat is I see her in the hall, but as far as calling her...I'll do that IF there is vibe still there. If not, no big deal.

My opinion, was that even if she WAS interested up to last night, I probably pissed her off anyway seeing as I asked in front of this other dude...and that probably killed any attraction regardless.

The reason I asked last night in front of some other dude, is because she was talking to me anyway, she already gave the impression to the other dude that we talk a lot based on our conversation, I had the vibe they were jsut friends, and when I got her number, I was playing it "friendly" NOT, give me your number so we can fvck. It seemed a right opportunity as the convo was flowing...

 

[jigga23]

ive had chicks flirt with me out of control then i step up and they get defensive. this one chick a short time ago was so fvckin flirty with me it was insane. we hung out before but i finally asked her what she was doing the next night and she was like umm going on a date. to play it cool i was like yea me too ill be downtown call me after yours. hahah the next night i got her in bed.

 

[DonGorgon]

ive had chicks flirt with me out of control then i step up and they get defensive. this one chick a short time ago was so fvckin flirty with me it was insane. we hung out before but i finally asked her what she was doing the next night and she was like umm going on a date. to play it cool i was like yea me too ill be downtown call me after yours. hahah the next night i got her in bed.

We have all been there..

 

[Mr. Me]

I probably pissed her off anyway seeing as I asked in front of this other dude...and that probably killed any attraction regardless.

Let's make the wild assumption that I'm correct in my assessment that when you didn't confidently act on her signal originally that she next'd you.

You don't think that, if anything, asking her for her number while another guy is present wouldn't be a display of confidence?

That's not to say that the damage isn't done (or undone) from the first time around.

 

[Señor Fingers]

Mr. Me is on point!

Women open windows of opportunity and wait for men who can read those signals to act on them, thus taking any responsibility of a hook-up off their shoulders.

If your wits are not sharp, you wont even see the window opening, because chicks are master of innuendo and doublespeak.

"Maybe we should have wine some time" = "Ask me for my number"

She shot you the ball and instead of bouncing it back you held onto it and then threw it at her before leaving. The interaction shows a lack of emotional/social intelligence on your part. You were not quick enough!

Don't beat yourself up though.. this is a great lesson for you to develop your communication skills along with your initiative. Next time be on the look out for these "invitations" and soon you will learn to decipher what they are really saying.

 

[DonGorgon]

If your wits are not sharp, you wont even see the window opening, because chicks are master of innuendo and doublespeak..

you mean masters of B&S

 

[Señor Fingers]

I'm afraid no gender has a patent on that one. All you have to do is look at a few of the threads here and you can clearly see that BS does not discriminate

You guys really do need to get off this whole chick-bashing craze, it doesn't make you nearly as attractive as you think.

 

[Tantric]

Let's make the wild assumption that I'm correct in my assessment that when you didn't confidently act on her signal originally that she next'd you.

You don't think that, if anything, asking her for her number while another guy is present wouldn't be a display of confidence?

That's not to say that the damage isn't done (or undone) from the first time around.

I thought so, but most people here like to bash what I DIDN'T DO, as opposed to what I did do...

 

[iqqi]

I think you did everything just fine, Tantric.

Even how you got her # in front of that guy, that was pretty confident and DJ.

Since she was acting funny though, I'd say your next step is to feel her out next time you see her. Don't call her, unless she flirts with you when you see her, and you get the feeling her IL is still high. That could have just been an off moment for her.

Let her invite you back into the "dance". With IL, and flirting, eye contact, whatever. The ball is in her court, all you have to do is be receptive to the signs.

 

[SharinganUser]

If your wits are not sharp, you wont even see the window opening, because chicks are master of innuendo and doublespeak.


If your hand-eye coordination is decent, you can throw rocks at the window too. That's what I do.

 

[j0n024]

Damn it Iqqi you have some crazy advice..I would say something else but I think it would be construed as an attack lol.

I gotta say though that "Fieldhouse," is a fvcking awesome name for you place lol. But I think the reason she was hesitant was to not look like a slvt infront of 2 guys..But hey whatever dude...just DJ some more girls bring them to your place and maybe she will see them and you 2gethor and get jealous and see what all the hubub is all about lol...good luck.

 

[Tantric]

I do agree I have to feel it out at this point. There is either NOTHING there, or she will be receptive...either way I'll know when I see here next.

Yeah, I could have done things differently...but too late to change that now...

 

[DonGorgon]

You guys really do need to get off this whole chick-bashing craze, it doesn't make you nearly as attractive as you think.

ummmm... the sexes have always and will always battle... as long as I am getting PU$$Y i am fine...