Old Relationship.....

[dsenart]

I am looking for some sound advice from other guys out there who might have been through this before.. or just have some good ideas in general. Please serious comments only. I know some people might think i'm a joke for posting this but oh well here it is..

Several years ago i dated this lady for 3 years. We broke it off rather badly ( mostly my fault.. i apparently wasn't as smooth as i thought i was ) Since then we have both moved on and gotten married. I have been married for 4 years her i think about 2 and a half.

She moved out of state after she got married. Well within the past few months she moved back.

I would like to have a friendship with her but I am not sure she wants one back. I also have no idea what her husband might say to the idea. Even if it was as something as simple as email I would like to just be in contact with her.

I know where she lives and her phone number. Do you think I should just call her, should I just wait until i run into her or send her a letter?( is it better face to face or is the phone ok? etc.. )

I honestly want nothing more then that but just don't know what to do. I would rather it be face to face when I talk to her so i can see her reactions.. but haven't seen her to do so.. I have been trying to find out where she works to no avail.

Suggestions, Comments? Thanks again.

 

[Chief]

Let it go...

Man, I just have to say from my experience...let it go! Why do you need her as a friend? Leave the poor girl alone..Straight up, that simple. Move on.

 

[NewMan]

I agree...

If you are over her - be over her.

Why would you want to complicate things in both your lives?

There is something here that you are hiding.

 

[Vexpen]

Keep moving forward and resist looking back. I cannot see how establishing a friendship could ultimately be a good thing for either of you.

I have been tempted to contact my ex-wife (of now 6 years) from time to time just to see how she and her family are doing. However, there just does not seem to be enough positive outcomes from starting any sort of communication with her.

Good luck.

 

[Slickster]

There is nothing wrong with being "friendly" with your ex's.

However a friendship isn't going to work especially if you are married. There's too much baggage and past feelings there. Why would you or her want to dig all that old stuff up when you have both moved on?

Think about it man. How would you like it if your wife was getting phone calls or going out with one of her ex's all the time.

I think you need to look deep inside yourself and ask yourself why it is that you feel the need for this friendship.

When you can answer that then your next step will be revealed.

 

[cave dweller]

Why????????

Hey,

Have you ran this past your wife?.....NO....

Have you ran this past her current husband?.......NO.....

You are just trying to 'hit that thing' and get a little 'booty' on the side.

Man, let go........................

..................WRONG ANSWER.......................

cave dweller

 

[Ricky]

I know what he's talking about though.

I dated this girl for 3 years and knew marriage wasn't the answer for us. I've moved on but still think about her from time to time.

I wish she could be a friend, I know my current gf wouldn't like it much. It just isn't done nowadays which is kind of sad.

I say bring back polygamy and end oneitis forever.

 

[penkitten]

Re: Why????????

Originally posted by cave dweller
Hey,

Have you ran this past your wife?.....NO....

Have you ran this past her current husband?.......NO.....

You are just trying to 'hit that thing' and get a little 'booty' on the side.

Man, let go........................

..................WRONG ANSWER.......................

cave dweller

ditto