Old plate/love interest reached out

[flowtheory]

So I downloaded LINE app to talk to someone new I met online, and when I downloaded it, a past interest of mine saw I now have it. She messaged me, and about 10 messages in she said she would love to meet up with me to reconnect if I’m interested. I haven’t responded because I’m just not sure I want to again.. And throughout the exchange I’ve been very short with her.

In the past we have had s3x, swapped dirty photos, dates, etc.
The first time around with her (4 years ago) we saw each other for about three months. We weren’t ever exclusive. My interest was really high in her, but things eventually fell out. These were the days of my ultra blue pill.

Three years ago we started talking again and we met up like twice or so, had s3x both times from what I can remember. We were supposed to meet up again after that but she kept getting “busy” with the three jobs she had. She was always saying she was exhausted. I became annoyed and didn’t like the flakiness. I ended up sending a long text wishing her well. She never responded.

Last year she messaged me asking me a question about a travel destination I had went to. I never responded because I was in a relationship.

And now here she is again.
Should I even bother with this one?

 

[jimwho]

Well, meet up three times again. enjoy. Just don't get emotional in anyway. There you have it, have fun. You owe me one.

 

[TheGambino]

So I downloaded LINE app to talk to someone new I met online, and when I downloaded it, a past interest of mine saw I now have it. She messaged me, and about 10 messages in she said she would love to meet up with me to reconnect if I’m interested. I haven’t responded because I’m just not sure I want to again.. And throughout the exchange I’ve been very short with her.

In the past we have had s3x, swapped dirty photos, dates, etc.
The first time around with her (4 years ago) we saw each other for about three months. We weren’t ever exclusive. My interest was really high in her, but things eventually fell out. These were the days of my ultra blue pill.

Three years ago we started talking again and we met up like twice or so, had s3x both times from what I can remember. We were supposed to meet up again after that but she kept getting “busy” with the three jobs she had. She was always saying she was exhausted. I became annoyed and didn’t like the flakiness. I ended up sending a long text wishing her well. She never responded.

Last year she messaged me asking me a question about a travel destination I had went to. I never responded because I was in a relationship.

And now here she is again.
Should I even bother with this one?

Yes bother, but stay detached that’s the most important thing. Ask her out, don’t text or call too long. Meet up, have fun hook up.

 

[r4zorsharp]

honestly man you sounded way too invested the first time. when a girl isn't as invested you the same way and kinda seems like she can and does reach out to you when SHE wants.

safe to say, she's got other **** going on.. a nd to deal with any stresses or boredom of those situations, she'll find someone to play around with from time to time.

the other thing is, girls also do this when they're in a situation with a guy they like and it doesn't work out , they'll rebound. with dudes like you basically.

 

[flowtheory]

honestly man you sounded way too invested the first time. when a girl isn't as invested you the same way and kinda seems like she can and does reach out to you when SHE wants.

safe to say, she's got other **** going on.. a nd to deal with any stresses or boredom of those situations, she'll find someone to play around with from time to time.

the other thing is, girls also do this when they're in a situation with a guy they like and it doesn't work out , they'll rebound. with dudes like you basically.

Her interest is high enough to fool around but not high enough to really invest, is what you’re saying?

But even if she wants to just rebound.. or play around? Fine by me. As long as there’s no drama. I literally have no energy for it. I’m in the aftermath of a breakup myself, so I’m looking for a rebound too and nothing at all to invest in for at least 1-2 years, real talk.

The first time around with this one, I was way too invested. But now? I could take it or leave it.
We set up a plan for tomorrow to meet for a walk. We’ll see what happens. But she has been using phrases like ‘id love to see you’ ‘sounds lovely’ ‘sounds great’ and she made the whole thing very easy, plus the meet up was her idea. I haven’t really done anything to be honest. Just suggested the day and where.

I wouldn’t ever date her. But I’d love to bang her again and go out with her. She’s a solid 8.5 (has been a model for vogue)

 

[BackInTheGame78]

If you want something more than what you had the first time she has to see there is something different about you, otherwise her interest will evaporate quickly again.

Whatever caused this to happen needs to be different. Maybe your investment level was too high too soon and scared her away.

 

[Dash Riprock]

It's ALL about ROI: Return On (your time and $) Investment.

In other words, what do you want to get out of reconnecting with her given the fact you'll invest your time and likely some $? We all only have 24 hours in a day, so if you're investing in her, it's taking away from other areas of your life. This is one of the biggest mistakes I see guys make; investing in the WRONG woman despite all kinds of warning signs.

Is she a good investment? Only you can answer.

Good luck.

 

[Lookatu]

she made the whole thing very easy, plus the meet up was her idea. I haven’t really done anything to be honest. Just suggested the day and where.

I wouldn’t ever date her. But I’d love to bang her again and go out with her. She’s a solid 8.5 (has been a model for vogue)

No brainer as long as you're not doing anything, she's doing all the work, and there's no drama.

Just make it known up front that you have $hit to do early next day so she can put out and get out.

But just be aware that first sign of any resistance, and you are out of there.

 

[bcude]

It's ALL about ROI: Return On (your time and $) Investment.

In other words, what do you want to get out of reconnecting with her given the fact you'll invest your time and likely some $? We all only have 24 hours in a day, so if you're investing in her, it's taking away from other areas of your life. This is one of the biggest mistakes I see guys make; investing in the WRONG woman despite all kinds of warning signs.

Is she a good investment? Only you can answer.

Good luck.

Great point.
There's an easy way to see if she's worth investing in: is she a fvck YES (for you, considering what you're looking for in this moment)?
If not, she's not worth your time. Only you can answer this.
I got it from Mark Manson and it has served me well in many areas of life.

 

[flowtheory]

But just be aware that first sign of any resistance, and you are out of there.

Yea I’ll keep this in mind.

It's ALL about ROI: Return On (your time and $) Investment.

In other words, what do you want to get out of reconnecting with her given the fact you'll invest your time and likely some $? We all only have 24 hours in a day, so if you're investing in her, it's taking away from other areas of your life. This is one of the biggest mistakes I see guys make; investing in the WRONG woman despite all kinds of warning signs.

Is she a good investment? Only you can answer.

Good luck.

For me, she’s a decent short term investment. If things operate smoothly without any kinks I’d keep her around for a couple months. Don’t plan on investing much $ in to this anyone again. I do remember she was fun to fool around with and was easy company.

There's an easy way to see if she's worth investing in: is she a fvck YES (for you, considering what you're looking for in this moment)?

In this moment? Yes she would be. But I’ll decide fully tomorrow.

 

[EyeBRollin]

I always accept old flings or girlfriends.

Caveat: they must come on my terms. I invite them straight to my house. Anything other than compliance = no contact.

They must also do 100% of initiating contact on all subsequent encounters.

 

[BeExcellent]

Enjoy her. Will be a nice shot for your ego & will be good for you to spend time with someone who is easy to be with.

Your heart is still healing from your breakup so you aren’t going to have the bandwidth to fall in love anyway so you may as well enjoy her, enjoy yourself and feel desirable.

All good things.

Cheers

 

[flowtheory]

I always accept old flings or girlfriends.

Caveat: they must come on my terms. I invite them straight to my house. Anything other than compliance = no contact.

They must also do 100% of initiating contact on all subsequent encounters.

Damn. 100% on subsequent encounters? How long does that usually go on for before they get frustrated?

 

[Krueg]

She's just looking for no strings attached s3x..

 

[Glassguy]

Fvck her and then only respond to her when she initiates.

Don't stop hitting up new chicks.

Watch her interest magically grow. Wash. Rinse. Repeat.

 

[EyeOnThePrize]

Since you made this thread it makes me think you won't be able to stay ice cold and detached. If she's hot and fun then the answer should be duh fuuck her right in the pusssy, nothing to wonder about. Everyone is saying the right things, only have it on your terms, no initiation. I want nothing more than for you to prove me wrong.

 

[CAPSLOCK BANDIT]

If she's displayed a lack of boundaries with you in the past and wants to continue that further on into her life, she obviously hasn't matured much as a person.

Honestly, women who come crawling back, especially repeatedly, there is almost always something wrong with them, there is too much options for women today, normal women, to face their ego and crawl back, but a woman who is a bridge burner, immature, reckless, it's a pass.

 

[flowtheory]

This makes me want to just go ghost, cause I can barely be bothered with any hiccups.. she sent this about 45 mins ago:

“Hi flowtheory, tomorrow afternoon is not going to work for me to walk with you at *forest location* I’m sorry. I have now too many things to complete that I need to prioritize. Would you be interested in moving our walk to next week?”

Agree and let her do all the planning?

 

[flowtheory]

Since you made this thread it makes me think you won't be able to stay ice cold and detached.

Nah. I am quite detached from it. Made the thread because I don’t know if it goes against my self value or respect to open the door for her again. Was looking for perspectives on it.
I came to the conclusion that it would impinge upon my self-respect if I didn’t feel good about it at all, but still went. Or if I allowed her to violate my boundaries again and continue with it.

 

[r4zorsharp]

Her interest is high enough to fool around but not high enough to really invest, is what you’re saying?

But even if she wants to just rebound.. or play around? Fine by me. As long as there’s no drama. I literally have no energy for it. I’m in the aftermath of a breakup myself, so I’m looking for a rebound too and nothing at all to invest in for at least 1-2 years, real talk.

The first time around with this one, I was way too invested. But now? I could take it or leave it.
We set up a plan for tomorrow to meet for a walk. We’ll see what happens. But she has been using phrases like ‘id love to see you’ ‘sounds lovely’ ‘sounds great’ and she made the whole thing very easy, plus the meet up was her idea. I haven’t really done anything to be honest. Just suggested the day and where.

I wouldn’t ever date her. But I’d love to bang her again and go out with her. She’s a solid 8.5 (has been a model for vogue)

Doesn't require much interest to fool around man. "fool around" is the key words here. This is a former? model for vogue man.. you got nothin to lose and all to gain. If it were me i wouldnt have even made a post. Either way man, enjoy it for what it is and nothing more!