ok so heres the update with that chick

[CrazyGoNuts]

so i asked this chick for her friends number since this was my only way of gettin it before the next time I see her. She was surprised to hear that I wanted the number and she says this..

"Wow, ok you can give him the number, but just ya know ... as friends for now"

apparently there is some douche she is obsessed with, but he doesnt really like her all that much. Im thinkin I can stay in the picture a bit, work my game for awhile and see if I can sway her affections toward me.

So her friend just asked if I still want the number. I think I have a few options:

1) take the number, and just dont call her. I will probably end up seeing her this weekend anyways. This way I still have a slight upper hand.

2) take the number and actually call her to get to know her a bit. She is very shy and a home-body, gettin to know her is probably what she likes to do with guys.

3) dont take the number and ignore her when I see her

 

[CrazyGoNuts]

shameless bump here ... I am just really curious as to what the best course of action is here or Im gonna lose a really awesome chick

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Never EVER EVER NEVER EVER EVER EVER get a HB's number from anyone else but her!!!! That comes of as desperate, stocker-ish and a bit creepy. Plus if your already going to see her this weekend then just talk to her then.

Seems like this girl knows you want her and you haven't been much of a challenge. Hence she's interested in the "douche bag." If I were you, I'd copy his style and see if she comes after you. But like I said definitely DO NOT get her # from her friend. You shouldn't have even asked your friend about it. Just work your own game bro.



PIMP

 

[CrazyGoNuts]

see thats definitely my style too, i was like no way in hell am i gonna go through 2 peope to get her phone number. But i said ya know what, i messed up bigtime by ignoring her all night, she obviously wanted to talk to me so I need to talk to her asap. I asked a friend who could be consider a good PUA and he pretty much such said under normal circumstances I should wait, but since i seemed like i wasnt interested in her I should do whatever i need to do to get the digits.

I feel like she has the upper hand now tho, i wanna make it seem like i have the number but i aint gonna use it for now. Unfortunately I think she knows I didnt get the number cuz she told her friend it was cool. So then she tells her boyfriend, my best friend, and he pretty much said whatever this girl is stupid whats the point. Its definately my fault for goin through her tho so I know its up to me to rectify the situation.

 

[ManOMan]

Just as a side note buddy,

For some reason, girls who are in love with a douche bag rarely get over them.

You may be next in line, and sweep her off her feet, but that douchebag jerkoff will always be in her mind

this is coming from experience, I went out with a girl who was involved with a guy that would treat her like crap, cancel dates, blow her off, I came into the picture and dated her for a bit,

as soon as the douchebag called her in the future, She was Ready and able to meet him

I NEXTED her

 

[CrazyGoNuts]

yeah thats what worries me, the thing is she isnt really very experienced with relationships and stuff. As I said before she is the most beautiful girl I ever laid my eyes on and I have some pretty high standards, but she is still a virgin at 20 and I dont think she has had many boyfriends.

Playin "the game" might work with chicks who know how to play the game back as well but I think this girl might be oblivious to alot of stuff. Maybe being AFCish towards her is what she is lookin for.

 

[ManOMan]

well from my experience, its always a safer bet to "play the game" then to wonder if she is or not

Like a Tactical movement, Always be armed

this goes back to the DJ mindset theory, you dont play the game to get what you want, you play the game because thats who you ARE

 

[CrazyGoNuts]

ya know something you are right, if anything i can consider this girl to be practice for the future. I think when I see her this weekend I will talk to her as if I never even asked for her number, maybe try and talk to some random girl or two in front of her so she knows I'm not sweatin it.

Maybe I will even get the number from her that night unless she pulls that "as friends" stuff again. I want that number for one reason: so I can call her to set up a date not to chat about life and happiness. Normally I would call anyways and chat for hours and play the friend thing, but a few hours of readin articles in the DJ Bible have taught me ALOT.

 

[TesuqueRed]

You're thinking of how to play her game. You're making excuses for what she is and trying to adjust to that. This hasn't ever produced much for me--or if it did, anyone even slightly more "dangerous" or "exciting" than me easily moved in w/o effort. You're inhibiting yourself--playing a weak hand is not how you win for long.

But this innocence game works for her somehow. She's got you and others like you acting all safe and neutered around her and she doesn't have to address her sexuality or face growing up just yet. That's not really a crime at 20, but it's getting to the askin' questions stage. So, I mean, this has gotten her to be a 20 yr old semi-obsessed virgin. Where do think that will get you?

Take her along on your ride--that's what's exciting and scary to her. And if she's not ready, move on and maybe you'll run into her when she is.

Anyway -- you already blew it IMO. Her friend let her know of yor interest 5.27 seconds after you were out of site and she could get the number dialed into the cell phone. Now she knows you--an older, experienced guy and a player with other chicks--were afraid to approach her (how it looks to her) and that you are intersted so much that you have to come through her "ladies in waiting" -- which means she's the queen and you're just another courtier. Other women don't have this affect on you, but she apparently does.

Courtier's are fine for a time. But she'll want a king soon enough, and you'll not be that in her mind now.

Maybe you can make something short term out of it. Otherwise, I'd say learn your lesson and move on.

BTW--your putting her on a pedestal and playing with one-itis here, which would explain a fair amount of the justification you're doing here.

Damage is already done IMO, you're just playing for a smaller hand now. Bag it--move on. Or play it out and see if I'm not far off the mark.

 

[CrazyGoNuts]

hmm you bring up alot of good points, the thing is I never knew about this site until 2 days ago but I wish had found it sooner. Its weird how this all came to play tho.

First day I met her we talked it up alot. made plans for the next night that didnt happen cuz someone that supposed to go got sick as hell.

A few days later I am with her friend and she says they wanna go out on Thursday and Jen (the girl I want) invited me to come cuz I "was nice". Ok so she invited me out and she thinks I am nice, not bad...

Then we get there and I am totally different than I was the first night we met, but I thought i might still be in good shape. Then the next day her friend is askin my boy if I want her number so it seems to me there is some decent IL goin on here.

It sucks cuz I only asked for the number after her friend asked if I would want it. I figured ok this gives you a reason to get the number: "Hey jen i asked CGN if he wanted your number and he definitely does, that cool?" or somethin to that effect.

You are completely right tho, I cant put her on a pedestal any longer or I risk losin somethin good. I am hopin to make my way from AFC to rAFC by the time I see her again.