Ok, Let's do this!

[Arts]

Hi guys, I'm new to this forum. Been reading the topics here for several weeks and have found them to be intriguing.

I'm going to be as direct as I can be here.

I'm going to tell you exactly what I am at this moment, and where I would like to get.

Who I am right now

I'm 16 years old, a Junior in high school. I'm not a very social person, or a very confident person either. I want to change that. What I'm primarily looking for out of this topic is advice of what to do to "train" my confidence so I can feel comfortable talking to people.

To be as objective as possible, I will describe myself using past experiences and thoughts instead of my own biased opinions of myself.

When it comes to talking to people, I always feel some form of anxiety while I'm talking to people. I think that I'm most afraid of being judged and creating a bad reputation for myself.

As to comparing myself to people, I always have the negative thought running through my head that I don't measure up to other people. So, I need help getting rid of these thoughts.[/i]

Where I want to get to

I want to be more powerful while I'm talking with someone. I'm tired of talking to someone with the vibes of "You're better than me".

I want to get to the point where I won't feel affected at anything anybody says.

See, my problem is that I always feel nervous whenever I'm talking with someone. I have never not felt nervous before, it's hard to even imagine being in a conversation without feeling anxiety. Anxiety in conversations is all that I know.

Here is how I am when I talk with people. I act like a plain weirdo, I say the first thoughts that come out of my head. In fact, I pretty much say whatever comes into my thoughts.

Whenever I try to think or plan out what I'm going to say, my mind blanks. It doesn't even seem like I'm thinking, my mind just stalls while trying to come up with what to say.

So guys, just tell me what I should do if you've been in my situation, and I'll do it.

 

[Arts]

How come my topics are never replied to?

 

[SPEAK]

ok first off man, the only opinion that should matter to you is YOURS. NO ONE FVCKING CARES about you, they only care about themselves. Human beings are selfish, evolution ensured this. Everyone else is thinking the same thoughts as you! So you asked what do I need to do to get rid of these thoughts? Here it is.

1. Detach yourself from you while in conversations. Look at them, and see all of THEIR faults.

2. Adopt the frame of mind that people NEED to measure up to YOU. You are determining if THEY are good enough to be talking to you. Why? Because you are the SH!T. Buy a book on NLP or something, or just think thoughts like: "I am the sh!t." "Everyone wants to be as cool as me" "Nobody is worthy of my time." Stuff like that, you are the one screening them, not the other way around.

3. Don't give a fvck. High school is insignificant in your life, although it may seem really important to you now. You will never see these kids again, so why not use it as a learning experience and try not to care what other people think. People are always going to judge you, so just worry about how you view yourself and not how you think they are viewing you.
"They;re gonna judge me anyway, so whatever." - Kid Cudi


Read my signature, and of course the Bible.
Post back after you start changing the way you think, and view yourself as THE MAN.


S.P.E.A.K

 

[jnice48146]

What SPEAK said!

You know, Arts, you are a lucky guy! You found this site at 16! I did pretty well in high school, but I could have done so many more chicks with the info on this site! I didn't find it until I was 32! So no matter how wrong some of this may seem, do it anyway! The more you read the more you'll find that being a DJ is about having control of you own life, being a MAN! Once you can do that, the world is at your feet, along with everyone in it!

Good Luck!

 

[Chrom3y]

Yea man go ahead and start changing your life NOW!!!!
You won't regret it that's for sure. We are lucky have found this site at a young age since we aren't naturals. Although I'm no where near where I want to be, I owe a lot to sosuave.

Keep us posted once the changes you want to see start to develop.

 

[mustang92]

Have you looked at the DJ boot camp google it it will boost your confidence greatly if you follow it

 

[horaholic]

I will add one thing here. You say whenever you speak, weird things come out of your mouth.

Not only should you accept this, but you should EMBRACE it. Thats who you are, and what makes you unique. Embrace it as your INDIVUALITY. Actually, I guess I'd have to hear what kind of wierd shyt you're talking about, to really say this. just make sure the things you say are entertaining. Just be FUNNY weird.

You are really young. You'll get better as you grow. a LOT of us were socially retarded in high school, and we're fine now. I was a total geek metalhead long hair in a school full of cowboys and preppies. I didnt fit in. I got laid TWICE in high school. High school is a joke.It wasnt until I graduated that I embraced by outcastness. I got into the punk rock scene, and I fit in there. We actually made it a POINT to be weirdo's. Im not saying you should do that, but you will find a social scene that you feel comfortable with eventually. With that, your confidence will rise. Just dont get TOO caught up in it. Especially with any kind of 'image.' After having mohawks for ten years I realized that I didnt need to put on a uniform to be an individual. Of course, my 'uniform,' definitely got me noticed. I was a natural peacock, I guess.

Basically, though, whatever kind of person you are, embrace it to the fullest. Be proud, and always strive for improvement. Be your BEST self. And it probably doesnt feel like it to you, but you are very young, and some of these things take time. I wish I had this site when I was our age, thats for damn sure.

It never dawned on me that that i needed to learn how to attract women, instead of just 'hoping' they'd like me, and having too low of self opinion to make a move if they did, resulting in friendzone after friendzone with girls that I could have been railing. It still affects my game to this day.

Its really important that you talk to people. Even if they dont like you. They will, if you tell them some jokes or something.

Get some action while your young! It will help you for the rest of your life! Hell, I'm 33 on here learning this shyt!