Official Sosuave poster roast thread?

[sageproduct]

LOL this thread is a fwcking gold mine and needs to live on

Sageproduct spends all of 15 minutes thinking of a good roast to revive this thread with. Can't think of one.

 

[sageproduct]

Harry Wilmington gave up on promoting his website here

Sneevox discovers the SECRET TO THE UNIVERSE and shares it with everyone in the DJ chat room. He doesn't realize that the room is empty.

ive and Burroughs hook up. Strangely enough, the word "fagg0t" and all caps phrases disappear from his posts

Purefilth reveals he's really just been sick of cleaning all the hot girls' toilets

a group of SSers are zapped into a fantasy world. While trying to cross a bridge, a troll appears and claims to be female. The bridge then figuratively explodes.

SSers in the fantasy world are kidnapped by some hairy mountain trolls and bound together. The lead troll tells them that if they suck each other's d1ck then they'll set them free. Everyone knows the troll is lying, but bradd80 says "Guys I like to assume the troll is serious!" and proceeds to not only give everyone *******s but also go into great detail elaborating on what he's doing. Sageproduct laments to the heavens as to why the first bl0wjob he's ever gotten is from a man. synergy1 tries to debate with the trolls over investment strategies. It doesn't work out. Once this is all finished, Naughty Ninja reveals himself to be the troll in disguise and celebrates his trolldom jubilantly while everyone else is left wondering if they'll ever recover from that trauma

 

[BeDJ]

Sageproduct practices celibacy religiously while Naughty Ninja practices unintentionally.

 

[sageproduct]

BeginningDJ has a crush on me

 

[BeDJ]

I feel left out. Can someone make fun of me too please?

I can't, you're such a nice guy...

 

[BeDJ]

bradd80's taste buds are so bad, he can't tell if he's licking the cooch or the cornhole.

 

[Naughty Ninja]

The Indian Race Troll A.K.A JackRobin considers approaching white chicks eating hamburgers a c0ckblock.


Backbreakers replies are typed like a drunk trying to play whack-a-mole.

 

[sageproduct]

Wait I'm not the only virgin on SS???????????????????

JohnChops was so busy motivating himself he forgot to eat...and died

 

[Atom Smasher]

5string is so ugly, Mrs. 5string takes him to work with her so she doesn't have to kiss him goodbye.

 

[Atom Smasher]

I should have shown more class. NEVER insult a man who wears a monocle by saying he wears glasses! For some reason I'm getting a mental picture of Mr. Peanut, who, by the way, would b!tch slap me if I suggested he wears glasses. He'd probably take off one of his white gloves and b!tch slap me with the glove.

I looked up "spats" on Wikipedia and saw a picture with this caption... "Senator Charles Sumner (left) wearing spats in 1863. At right is Henry Wadsworth Longfellow.".

I'm assuming that you're Henry Wadsworth Longfellow. If you're not, I suggest calling your penis "Sir Henry Wadsworth Longfellow". Then you have the perfect setup for an awesome pick-up line!

"Hello there ladies. My name is Atom Smasher and this is my faithful companion and entertainer of the female species, Sir Henry Wadsworth Longfellow.". I think this lines REEKS of class and will have women frozen in a state of arousal, much like a Cro-Magnon man frozen in the depths of Arctic Ice.

I tried it. She took one look at my Longfellow and said, "Haven't we metaphor?"

Then she said I was only average, and I told her she is being mean...

 

[Atom Smasher]

Great, bradd80, I thought we went NC with Mauser...

Don't let it happen again. Stay strong. Even if he blows up the thread. Your sanity depends upon it.

 

[Naughty Ninja]

Jophil is trollolololing So Suave from beyond with high-quality fake passport thread spam while LiveFreeX rubs one out everytime he sees them.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Man, Jophil is the hardest guy to ban than anyone I've ever met.

Jophil! I summon thee!!!

 

[Naughty Ninja]

Man, Jophil is the hardest guy to ban than anyone I've ever met.

Jophil! I summon thee!!!

So far no ones roasted Vice, Jitterbug, Pimp-sicle, Vladpatton, PoonaniMaker.

CordonCordon will enter the Official So Suave Poster Roast only to post pictures of his girlfriend. BackBreaker will follow shortly after to tell everyone how much hotter his wife is followed by rambling incoherent Days of Our Lives drama.

PureFilth only joined this site originally as the slob is so stupid he thought So Suave was an online Shampoo company.

Muscleman has a dark heart along with numerous STD's.

 

[Down Low]

Burroughs tried to hold out as long as he could, and demanded $10 million, but the sons of b1tches at Illuminati gave him twice that and a fabulous flat near The City. Next week he starts writing biting social commentary labeled as farce and satire for Financial Times under the pen name "Gaylord Rothschild."

 

[Mike32ct]

goundra has a million ways to get rich, if only we would be willing to listen and actually do it.


......and then to make sure to tell him it worked so that he can go ahead and try it himself.

Goundra's methods worked for dont, metoo, bonie, and twentee.

Allegory is still looking for a post that he agrees with.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Burroughs has decided to infiltrate the other side and is grooming himself to become the next pope.

Bless me Burroughs, for I have sinned......

 

[switch]

goundra has a million ways to get rich, if only we would be willing to listen and actually do it.


......and then to make sure to tell him it worked so that he can go ahead and try it himself.

LMAO :crackup:

 

[Plutoman]

Harry Wilmington had a near-death experience when he ran out of minutes on his phone, forcing him to consider texting.

Naughty Ninja played the field, only to realize that every girl he picked up were already being tapped by guys using his openers on PoF.

sageproduct gets kicked out of the subway for hitting on too many girls. He decides to walk, meets a girl on the streets, sets up a date, and halfway through she starts gesturing for money. Only then did he realize he picked up a hooker.

saturnalia spends hundreds of thousands on surgery to look like a male model, and still just creeps out every girl within hundreds of miles.

Parad0x is still looking for a perfect woman; the ultimate paradox.

 

[Purefilth]

Livefreex realised his wife wasn't worth the 1 dollar he paid for her, so he hung himself in shame.

NaughtyNinja is soon to realise that he can't get girls numbers in his store because he's sniffing their shoes + fapping in front of them.