*OFFICIAL* December 2011 Bootcamp - Week 3

[flint]

DJ Boot Camp - Week #3

Theme: Approaching and Initiating Conversations with Girls
Number of reading articles: 3
Number of music picks: 11
Number of exercises: 1
Response thread: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=35203

Introduction to week 3

All right... we're in our third week now!!

After completing last week's lesson, you should now be much more comfortable speaking with strangers. This is a powerful skill that will serve you for years to come in many areas of your life. Now, let's take this skill to the next level...

Purpose of this lesson: At this point, we now have learned to maintain eye contact and greet and hold brief conversations with strangers.

Now, for this week, we are going to hold conversations with strangers, but this time the strangers will be women we would consider dating. This is the final step before we go for a number close, and by the time this week is over, we will be even closer to our goals!


Reading Material


Article 1 - How to cut down on your rejection rate by 99% (by Jake Steed)

Here's a quick and simple strategy for approaching girls. By following this strategy you'll know before approaching a girl if she would be interested in talking with you.

Source: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=16763


Article 2 - A simple and practical guide to an approach (by Adonis)

The title says it all... Here's a simple guide for approaching a girl. Even includes an excellent tip for approaching a girl when she's with a group of friends.

Source: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=16353


Article 3 - Overcoming FEAR is easy when you know how... (by Robert Jordon)
You see a girl you want to approach... but what is this? Fear is preventing you from making the next move. Don't let that fear get in your way!

Source: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=16648


Additional readings
Go through the reading material from the second week, as they will apply to this lesson.


Music Picks

Tush - ZZTop

Sharp Dressed Man - ZZTop

Pretty Woman - Roy Orbison

Girls, Girls, Girls - Motley Crue

The Rock Show - Blink 182

Julianne - Ben Folds Five

Hollywood Nights - Bob Seger

You'll Accomp'ny Me - Bob Seger

Bad Medicine - Bon Jovi

TNT - AC/DC

Same Ol' Situation - Motley Crue


Exercises

While last week we went out and spoke with ten strangers, male or female, young or old, this time our weekly exercise is to go and hold a short conversation (2 – 10 minute each in length) with women that you would normally be interested in dating.

Now, this may seem a little daunting for some people, but when you stop and think about it, there really is no difference between a drop-dead gorgeous babe and middle-aged guy, at least when it comes to holding a brief conversation.

To be successful, just keep everything in perspective... humans are humans. Do this and you won't have any more trouble with this lesson than you did with the one from last week.

Also, in addition to the reading material from this week, you might want to refresh on the reading material from last week since those articles will be just as useful.

After each conversation, write the results in your journal. After completing the assignment, report back to the response thread and share with us one or two of your encounters.

You have until this time next week, to finish this lesson. As well, keep on practicing the skills you learned in the previous two lessons, so that you don't lose them.

And don't forget the 3-second rule discussed in the previous lesson. You'll find that it will be ten times more powerful now, since it will force you to overcome the fear that often develops when you think too much about approaching an attractive girl. Here's a copy-and-paste of the 3-second rule from last week...

"Also, a tip that might help you with this lesson, and the next few lessons, is the 3 second rule (You can find it on ASF). What this means is that when you find someone you might be interested in approaching, don't give yourself more than 3 seconds from the moment you are able, to approach them. Anything longer than 3 seconds highly increases the chance that your nerves will work against you, and that you'll chicken out. Even if you have nothing planned to discuss with them, you'll find that you'll amazingly have something to say if you can only force your feet to propel you to the person."

Okay DJs, let's keep up the momentum. We're getting closer and closer!

 

[JonJaper]

LOL, by only counting conversations with women last week, I unintentionally did Week 3 bootcamp work in Week 2. BUT... in Week 2 I spoke to all kinds of women (old ones, fat ones, hot ones), so I guess the difference in Week 3 is to only count conversations with hot girls i.e. HB7s or above.

I found that my weakness is in escalating so I'll focus on that but at the same time release my inner child (as mentioned in the Week 2 thread) and letting go of overanalysis and other inhibition.

 

[Leopold]

LOL I think i already started this on week 2. I only did girls i was interested as well. Guess I should just keep going doing what i was doing ROLF

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

Don't know is this will count because it was borderline 2 minutes. Had to get this cashiers number quickly because a old lady was behind me buying stuff.

*She seemed too look kinda mad when I came up to her counter*
Me: Hey how are you doing
Her: Good how are you doing?
Me: Good, So how long have you been working here?
Her: Around 1 month.
Me: O ok, I used to work here back in the day, I never seen you around.
Her: Yea, I'm new.
Me: My name is AJ what's yours?
Her: *name*
Me: So do you go to the local school?
Her: Yea
Me: What year are you?
Her: I'm a Sophomore.
Me: How do you like it?
Her: She said something. Wasn't paying attention because I knew I was about to ask her for her number. Trying to think how to do it.
Me: Well why don't you put your number on the receipt and we will finish this conversation later.
Her: *writes number down*

So I'm gonna hit her up after I work today. That's one down.

 

[AlexLefty]

So I'm gonna hit her up after I work today. That's one down.

Simple, and most importantly it got the job done. Awesome!

I noticed that you guys are all 21, with the exception of Flint, and I'm not done with week 2 yet you guys can read the story in the week 2 thread, so I think you all have a big advantage in the next 2 weeks with the bar and club scene.

Help me think of some places that I can get good convos with hot women. I'm thinking the mall and maybe like a bowling alley but I don't know about that because I don't actually want to bowl.

So I'm going out to volunteer now and I'll finish up week 2 and try to start on week 3.

 

[flint]

Lol quite the opposite Alex. I'm working full-time, so I only get a couple of hours a day to try and fit in some approaches. If you're in school you get out at 2 or whatever. Plus day game can be effective.

I would say there are a couple of places you could go-

1) Hired guns are everywhere, and are usually pretty hot. You can find them at coffee shops, clothing stores, the mall, etc.

2) Places people who don't drink would go on a weekend. For example a bowling alley. Grab an alley next to a group of hot chicks and you can challenge them to a contest or something. Same can be applied to like mini gulf.

3) Places you go grocery shopping. Believe it or not I got about 1/3 of all of my hello's from CVS during week 1. Also if you're grocery shopping there are girls all ages hanging around.

4) Somewhere people get food like applebees. Sometimes these places have bars too so you can even get around your age. Just be creative man.

 

[AlexLefty]

So it took me an hour to take the bus and trax to get to the childrens museum to volunteer, and when I got there, it was closed. Yet, there is a bright side to everything! I'm posting the end of my week 2 here:

9) This conversation was while I was waiting for a transfer train on my way to the museum. On this one, I made eye contact with a guy, and he actually opened me, commenting on how cold I must have been. The convo went for like 20 mins, and honestly I was getting tired of it because the guy didn't seem like he had all his marbles.

10) I decided to try and get a convo or two in while I was at the mall - which is where the museum is located (it's an outside mall though, so not very packed for this time of year) - so I started a convo with the hired gun who was at a little stand offering free cyder.

11) On the trax ride home I overheard a guy who was talking on the phone about how he was going to a hockey game. A few minutes after he got off, I said "So you're a hockey fan?". Convo ensued from there.

Lol quite the opposite Alex. I'm working full-time, so I only get a couple of hours a day to try and fit in some approaches. If you're in school you get out at 2 or whatever. Plus day game can be effective.

I would say there are a couple of places you could go-

1) Hired guns are everywhere, and are usually pretty hot. You can find them at coffee shops, clothing stores, the mall, etc.

2) Places people who don't drink would go on a weekend. For example a bowling alley. Grab an alley next to a group of hot chicks and you can challenge them to a contest or something. Same can be applied to like mini gulf.

3) Places you go grocery shopping. Believe it or not I got about 1/3 of all of my hello's from CVS during week 1. Also if you're grocery shopping there are girls all ages hanging around.

4) Somewhere people get food like applebees. Sometimes these places have bars too so you can even get around your age. Just be creative man.

Very good advice, thank you. The bowling alley is a good idea, but I feel like it's a lot of chance; same with mini golf. For example, I'm spending $10 on the chance that there are approachable girls bowling or mini golfing. There is a place called Fat Cats that has bowling, I'll try that.

From what you guys say, hired guns are good approaches, but I've never approached a hired gun and don't really know how to open. From what I can gather it has to be a quick and simple approach (since the guns are working). In fact, while I was at a clothing store in the mall today, a hired gun asked me: "Do you need any help?". I declined but I can now see how this was an opportunity. Next time my response will be something like: "Actually I do, what do you think of [...]" - "Well since you asked, I'm kind of having a debate with my friend, maybe you can help me out, what is your opinion on [...]" - or simply say "Yes" and ask a REAL question related to the store, and then continue from "Thank you, [I'm Alex] what's your name anyways?" Any advice/tips? Approaching hired guns seems to require a different approach than normal night/day gaming.

Grocery stores are good too, but it is a long shot. Usually the women my age are with their parents etc. and it is kind of awkward, but I should approach anyways.

It's a lot harder to find viable mates to have conversations with when you're not in a gathering that is made specifically for socializing; club, bar etc. Even so, I will push through!!!

 

[flint]

Hey man I know what you mean but you're also assuming chicks at bars and clubs actually want to talk to you. Trust me when I say some girls go out just to shoot guys down to build their ego, and even when they're not bars and clubs are tough because any moderately attractive girl is going to be hit on 20 times in a night, so by the time you apply the 3 second rule and talk to her she's already got an inflated ego.

In regards to what you're saying about "chance" in bowling alleys and things like that, all of this is about chance. Women are everywhere, but sure you might walk into some place where there aren't any. Or even if there are, you go up and try to get her number, there's a chance that she says no. Then there's a chance she gave you a fake number, a chance she stands you up, etc. That's part of the game man but you have to play it if you want to win it.

 

[AlexLefty]

Went to the outside mall today instead of volunteering, and damn this is a lot harder once you actually get into the situation. I talked to a small vender man at the beginning to warm up myconversation skills. Then I went to store after store after store. In total, I only got 2 conversations in today, and am honestly a little disappointed with how poorly I did. Although, I know for sure that I wouldn't have been able to get even 2 conversations a year ago, but I can still do better.

1) I was in this clothing store looking in the womans section waiting for this hired gun to approach me, which she did after a while. I told her I was christmas shopping for my sister. She showed me around the store etc. and I got a good conversation in, and even some rapport. She was 20 but she seemed to be pretty interested (although I learned that she was payed on commission). She responded to kino with some light touching herself and was even teasing my a little. Anyways, she was trying to get me to check out and I realized that I wasn't actually shopping for my sister and that I had no money! So I told her I had to leave and that I'd be right back. I never went back but I'm thinking of going back tomorrow to number close.

2) This convo happened on the trax ride home. She was sitting on the side of me and had a shopping bag so I said: "a pair of shoes and 2 shirts" and that's how I opened. She was adding to the convo and asking me questions too but I didn't get a chance to number close and honestly wasn't even thinking about it.

Failures:
Right when I got to the mall I was standing next to a flame hand warmer thing and this 3 set of 9s and 10s walked by me. 2 of them were checking me out and spinning around to look at me. I simply froze and wasn't able to say anything. Damn.

As I went into a clothing store I told a hired gun that I was shopping for my sister. She explained the store a little bit etc. Then I said "What's your name again?" She said "Jordan" and I said "Nice to meet you my name's Alex, I have a nephew named Jordan" and she said "Oooh....K...." (it was akward) and then I kind of just walked away.

There are other non-memorable failures as well.


Tomorrow I'm going back to the same mall with my AFC friend in the morning. He's good looking but an AFC. Nonetheless, I'm hoping we can encourage each other and I can get more convos in.

 

[AlexLefty]

So wtf is going on here? Where are you guys?
I went out to the mall the past two days with some homies. Got 0 convos in.
My count is still two.
Going back tomorrow. Going to make a fool out of myself getting convos.

 

[JonJaper]

Went drinking with a friend and was with his work colleagues. Most were UGs, there was 1 girl who was good looking enough (HB7). Had a good conversation, but again, couldn't escalate past small talk.

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

My coutn is two. Chatted up a girl at work and number closed. Nothing spectacular. Just a bad time of the year for me to find honies with school being out.

 

[AlexLefty]

Ok so went to the mall again today with my AFC friend, we went for a long time!

I kept *****ing out and letting my aa, get the better of me, and after a long time, and failing like the day before etc. i just snapped. There were these two 7s sitting in the food court and i just literally opened. I told my friend to walk of like we got in an argument and then I walked over to them and was like "who are you?", sat down, and ran a routine. I got the number but she wasn't interested, you could tell.

My total is 3.

I'm not going to finish this week guys. I might be able to finish it on monday, since that's when I'm going back to the mall to sarge. I think i can get 7 on monday. GL

 

[MrJibbles]

Went to the mall yesterday. Talked to 4 girls, all hired guns in retail clothing shops:

1)The first chick was a fatty working an Old Navy. I pretended I was looking for a shirt for my younger female cousin (I did this for all of the convos). I felt nervous at first, and it was kind of awkward... I made up some stuff about looking for a flashy, bright-coloured style. The conversation carried on for about 5 or 10 minutes.
2)Went to another store that was a little more trendy. The chick there was pretty hot, around 8/10. This convo went by alot more smoothly... I could tell she was a little nervous... the chemistry wasn't bad though. I felt better about this one.
3)American Eagle. This chick was alot younger, around 16. I got IOIs as soon as I approached... my confidence had developed alot more by this point.
4)Final store. The chick working there was average-looking. This conversation was alright. Ironically, the best convo was with the hottest chick.

I am heading back to the mall today to finish my other 6 convos. I think I will ask for a number this time, and approach random chicks instead of hired guns. At a christmas party last night, I got friendzoned by a chick who wanted my d*** weeks ago. This put a little bit of a hole in my confidence, but I will get back up and use this to motivate me to try harder today.

 

[Sofomore]

I haven't been able to participate this week. I have been sick with strep throat since Monday and am now on antibiotics. Hopefully I will be better by Monday and can play catch up. Good luck guys.

 

[AlexLefty]

what's the plan?
Flint???

 

[JonJaper]

Surely allowances can be made for Christmas... nowhere near finished week 3 because of good times with family.

 

[AlexLefty]

Surely allowances can be made for Christmas... nowhere near finished week 3 because of good times with family.

Excuses?

 

[JonJaper]

Hey, hope everyone had a good christmas and new years!!

Are we ready to get this thing up and running again?

What's the progress been like?

 

[Leopold]

I dunno... I have confidence of steel by now. Im just enjoying myself with girls.

I have lots of them actually initiating the conversations with me. I get lots of smiles, hellos, honey, complements.. etc. Lots of kinos as well. No phones tho with random girls at the mall yet :/

Almost got one today from a VERY cute girl HB:7.5 but it turned out she has been here in US only for a month and dint actually had phone. LOL had so much fun with her (and so did she with me) but she wasn't worth the trouble to keep insisting on her for other source of contact.