Odd behavior from a friend's new lady...

[thadder]

I'm at the bar last night to see an old time friend, and one of my other friends was there with a new lady.

Waved to him, and then talked to the other friend I hadn't seen in a while.

Gradually making my rounds around I end up with him and notice he's got a new lady with him, but this is where it gets interesting.

She's making herself look... intimidating for some reason, like doesn't introduce herself, doesn't make an effort to ask my name or even about the same line of work we do (we're all photographers)

So I attempt make conversation with my friend and ask him how life's been and all, being chill and listening, not being boastful, but while doing this I tend to notice his lady friend attempting to kiss him right in front of me as we're talking, but I act like it doesn't bother me.

What's really odd is her behavior was so... off putting, like... is there something I missed? Was this some sort of **** test. Most "significant others" I've got to know often are friendly and warm up to me, but this one almost seemed to have a vendetta against me, I'm assuming it's some sort of mind game, but I avoided that trap.

Any ideas? Has anyone had similar experiences like this?

 

[Black Widow Void]

Could be a lot of things. I'll throw some thoughts out there, but it could also be none of the below.

They could have had a fight before arriving. She's trying to make up with him.
There could be newness to their relationship and she's trying to find where she stands against his friends.
She could be insecure.
She could be trying to spin her web on him.

The main question would be ... how did your friend react during all this? No answer necessary, but it's probably more important than her behavior.
Did he ignore you?
Engage in her PDF?
Did he ignore her?

 

[thadder]

Could be a lot of things. I'll throw some thoughts out there, but it could also be none of the below.

They could have had a fight before arriving. She's trying to make up with him.
There could be newness to their relationship and she's trying to find where she stands against his friends.
She could be insecure.
She could be trying to spin her web on him.

The main question would be ... how did your friend react during all this? No answer necessary, but it's probably more important than her behavior.
Did he ignore you?
Engage in her PDF?
Did he ignore her?

He didn't ignore me but definitely felt like he was trying to divide his attention accordingly.

She was the one kissing him and he was I think caught off guard by it.

I don't think he was ignoring her, but trying to juggle the amount of people to talk to.

I should say I never her once smile or even laugh at anything I would say, not even one like... change of expression, it was super cold.

 

[Fruitbat]

My guess would be she’s cluster B. She does not want any “friend” influence on her Mark. She will use sexual flattery to achieve this.

Another odd possibility, but is the friend intimidated by you? Any history?
It could have been something HE said. If he’s intimidated by you he might have pre dissed you in some way.

I have a friend who I am very competitive with, but I have 2 sports I always kick his @ss at.
I pounded him at golf and pool, repeatedly. When I saw his woman she asked me about my “violent temper when friend beat you”

so instead of going back and admitting I beat him by a large margin, every time, he was concocting a story about how HE beat ME and added a detail that I was super angry about it. When in fact, it was the opposite and I was a perfect gentleman in victory.

Men can be bitter and jealous too and don’t underestimate even your close friends ability to be totally insecure and shyt.

sounds to me like he might have said something about you and she was proving some kind of point to you:

either that or just standard cluster B.

or shyt test. The guy should have said “wtf you Doing, we are talking”

imagine a dude doing that to a woman who was talking to her girl friends.

 

[RangerMIke]

This is too simple. She wanted to be someplace else, not the bar.

 

[9-3enthusiast]

Coulda been a host of things...
As Mike says, maybe she simply didn't wanna be there..
Maybe she's very possessive and/or insecure and sees his friends as 'competition' for his attention.
Maybe he'd told her something about you she didn't like.

I had a mate told a girl I was a 'player', and she never liked me because she thought I was gonna... 'lead him astray...'

 

[9-3enthusiast]

Women love players. She will fck you while she hates you before she will give it up because your so nice and predictable.

Well yes... I did get the impression that she would have, if the opportunity came about.
But she really didn't like him socialising with me when she wasn't there.

 

[RangerMIke]

@RangerMIke gave the short version of this one.
I dont think it was you man. She saw you as a block atm to her getting the diddly. I dont think there is much more to this one.

Yep... why she didn't want to be there isn't really that important. I learned a long time ago is just take a woman's actions at face value... and not waste time trying to figure out 'why'. Just keep doing what you want to do and let her figure out if she is willing to accommodate what you want. Ignore all this passive-aggressive chick bvllsh1t since it is just an attempt at emotional manipulation. If you give into this cr@p, the net result is that she'll just lose respect for you.

Wait for her to communicate like a grown up person then respond accordingly... which is negotiate. There is an Hawaiian term called 'pono', it just means that actions you take must always honor what is correct instead of accommodation. Because as long as you are true to yourself, you don't really have to leave any situation you happen to be in. It's long term v. short term thinking.

It's like a chick that isn't responding to you... it really doesn't matter WHY, because this implies it is something you can fix. Her reasons are irrelevant; she either doesn't like you or she is playing games to get you to chase her harder. Regardless of her 'reasons' your response is always going to be to respect your 'pono', and move on to women that are going to make things easy, because in this situation the BEST you can achieve, if you get her, is that you end up with a game playing b1tch that is going to be a lot of work to keep her or a chick that is just going to use you until a dude she really wants comes along.

 

[Robert28]

My guess would be she’s cluster B. She does not want any “friend” influence on her Mark. She will use sexual flattery to achieve this.

Another odd possibility, but is the friend intimidated by you? Any history?
It could have been something HE said. If he’s intimidated by you he might have pre dissed you in some way.

I have a friend who I am very competitive with, but I have 2 sports I always kick his @ss at.
I pounded him at golf and pool, repeatedly. When I saw his woman she asked me about my “violent temper when friend beat you”

so instead of going back and admitting I beat him by a large margin, every time, he was concocting a story about how HE beat ME and added a detail that I was super angry about it. When in fact, it was the opposite and I was a perfect gentleman in victory.

Men can be bitter and jealous too and don’t underestimate even your close friends ability to be totally insecure and shyt.

sounds to me like he might have said something about you and she was proving some kind of point to you:

either that or just standard cluster B.

or shyt test. The guy should have said “wtf you Doing, we are talking”

imagine a dude doing that to a woman who was talking to her girl friends.

Yep typical narcissism.