Observations on getting older, game, and women.

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

In the last 5-7 years or so, black pill has overtaken red pill as the more popular of the non-blue pill viewpoints.

This is because the Red Pill has failed miserably in answering the basic rebuttals. Just hold masculine frame and spin plates will only get you so far.

 

[SW15]

Now going on to the next topic, relatability, it is your bread and butter.

I see relability as one ages to be more about superficiality. Women will consider a 6'0"+ and in shape guy relatable. So looks and fitness do matter in one's 30s just as much as one's 20s and maybe even more.

You must go to a big city or give up all hope for a great sex life.

-No social circle

After a man's 25th birthday.....

The presence or absence of a social circle in a man's life will determine his sex life more than the population of the metro area where he lives, so long as the area's population is over 150,000. When the area's population tends to go over 500,000-750,000, neighborhood choice matters a lot too. In larger areas, a man needs to choose to live in a singles dense area. In bigger metro areas, men who live in suburbs (generally oriented to those raising children under 18) are not going to be able to date effectively.

I have seen men with strong social circles in metro areas 300,000-600,000 date more effectively than men with weak circles in metro areas of 3-6 million. However, social circle oriented men tend to follow a more blue pill path and marry. Even extended serial monogamy behavior (trading out women every 1-4 years or so without marrying or having kids) is less common in men with social circles. Men with social circles tend to be more social circle dependent and won't risk alienating the social circle for future introductions. They'll stay in long term social circle generated relationships for fear of having to resort to swipe apps, random social media DMing, or cold approaching. These men have seen other men struggle with the aforementioned methods and don't want any part of that.

Being in a big city after age 25 puts in a man in position to have a sex life but doesn't guarantee anything. Once a man is in an area with 150,000 or more, the strength or weakness of his social circle will affect his sex life more than anything in the majority of cases. If a man stays unattached/marginally attached too long, his social circle will weaken as more of his contacts get into multiyear LTRs or married. Men tend to experience what I just described between ages 28-37.

Because pulling girls online is one thing but to learn daygame and nightgame so you can pull girls out of your league is something pays dividends as you get older. Especially now that online dating has been infested by bots and is practically pay to play.

Online dating is pay to play for men. Men need to pay for the unlimited swipes to be able to have a fighting chance. Most men only get matches on a fraction of 1% of their swipes, so you need the unlimited swipes to get a couple of matches, unless you're a 90th percentile + guy who is 6'0+ with six pack abs showing from multiple shirtless pics.

Daygame has always been a niche activity. Even 20-35 years ago, few men were randomly doing approach sessions at grocery stores, in malls, outdoors, etc. It's difficult to approach strangers at non-bar venues while sober.

The form of game that has changed the most since 1990 is bar/nightclub nightlife game. From 1990 until dating sites de-stigmatized in the mid-2000s, that was the most common place for stranger approaches to occur. Online dating and later swipe apps developed as an alternative to the challenges bar game presented in the 1980s-1990s. The bar scene is not fun at all. It can be difficult to get results from it. That's why "The Game" was so popular. Mystery and other PUAs were getting results from bar approaching. The PUAs realized that there were so many average guys (AFCs as they called them) who weren't getting results from bar approaching. There was one throwaway line in the book "Mystery Method" that says that the method is applicable in non-bar venues, though the vast majority of the book is focused on interactions that start in bars.

When Millennials became the dominant age cohort of singles starting in the late 2000s-early 2010s, they lacked the patience to deal with bar game that Gen X'ers put up with during the 1990s/early 2000s and Boomers in the 1970s-1980s. They thought efficiencies and effectivness were being created with websites and late swipe apps, but it didn't turn out that way.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

I see relability as one ages to be more about superficiality. Women will consider a 6'0"+ and in shape guy relatable. So looks and fitness do matter in one's 30s just as much as one's 20s and maybe even more.

Agreed. Women now are more entitled then ever.

After a man's 25th birthday.....

The presence or absence of a social circle in a man's life will determine his sex life more than the population of the metro area where he lives, so long as the area's population is over 150,000. When the area's population tends to go over 500,000-750,000, neighborhood choice matters a lot too. In larger areas, a man needs to choose to live in a singles dense area. In bigger metro areas, men who live in suburbs (generally oriented to those raising children under 18) are not going to be able to date effectively.

I have seen men with strong social circles in metro areas 300,000-600,000 date more effectively than men with weak circles in metro areas of 3-6 million. However, social circle oriented men tend to follow a more blue pill path and marry. Even extended serial monogamy behavior (trading out women every 1-4 years or so without marrying or having kids) is less common in men with social circles. Men with social circles tend to be more social circle dependent and won't risk alienating the social circle for future introductions. They'll stay in long term social circle generated relationships for fear of having to resort to swipe apps, random social media DMing, or cold approaching. These men have seen other men struggle with the aforementioned methods and don't want any part of that.

Being in a big city after age 25 puts in a man in position to have a sex life but doesn't guarantee anything. Once a man is in an area with 150,000 or more, the strength or weakness of his social circle will affect his sex life more than anything in the majority of cases. If a man stays unattached/marginally attached too long, his social circle will weaken as more of his contacts get into multiyear LTRs or married. Men tend to experience what I just described between ages 28-37.

I have never really cared for social circle nor poaching from.

The deterioration of social circles are inevitable. While our generation and even Gen Z are waiting later. If at all? Circles may last longer than in prior generations but I honestly think there's virtually 0 hope in mitigating the inevitable.

Most fellas are low T and simpy. Beta or lower. Will ditch the boys the sec a girl comes &&& they switch off. Cucked or in a beta marriage.

I don't think there's a good solution here. Potentially making new buddies regularly. Even then you lack a shared history and series of life experiences. A option but?

Online dating is pay to play for men. Men need to pay for the unlimited swipes to be able to have a fighting chance. Most men only get matches on a fraction of 1% of their swipes, so you need the unlimited swipes to get a couple of matches, unless you're a 90th percentile + guy who is 6'0+ with six pack abs showing from multiple shirtless pics.

Clarey did a cost evaluation on a dude 8/10s experience swiping. Was 1600 swipes. Really low number of matches. Absurd amounts of flaking. Was told to just pay lol.

I don't agree but the caliber is just rubbish.

Daygame has always been a niche activity. Even 20-35 years ago, few men were randomly doing approach sessions at grocery stores, in malls, outdoors, etc. It's difficult to approach strangers at non-bar venues while sober.

London day game model was a marketing strategy to combat MM initially. It also helps the abundance of tourism, logistics, and a number of things. There's spots that are better than others. Particularly some cities are just better. Since the BBC hit piece I wouldn't describe London as that. The amount of foreign girls is higher than many other places. Lots of tourism and turn over. Perfect for flash game and quick pulls short term.

The form of game that has changed the most since 1990 is bar/nightclub nightlife game. From 1990 until dating sites de-stigmatized in the mid-2000s, that was the most common place for stranger approaches to occur. Online dating and later swipe apps developed as an alternative to the challenges bar game presented in the 1980s-1990s. The bar scene is not fun at all. It can be difficult to get results from it. That's why "The Game" was so popular. Mystery and other PUAs were getting results from bar approaching. The PUAs realized that there were so many average guys (AFCs as they called them) who weren't getting results from bar approaching. There was one throwaway line in the book "Mystery Method" that says that the method is applicable in non-bar venues, though the vast majority of the book is focused on interactions that start in bars.

it's why krauser, torrero, and others ran with the day game approach. I actually enjoy it more as I got older. I think as fellas hit 50 and older, there's far less men who are still switched on. The other part is that energy is finite. A lot of men party like they are 20 in their 30s. They get fat. At 40 there's no way back.

When Millennials became the dominant age cohort of singles starting in the late 2000s-early 2010s, they lacked the patience to deal with bar game that Gen X'ers put up with during the 1990s/early 2000s and Boomers in the 1970s-1980s. They thought efficiencies and effectivness were being created with websites and late swipe apps, but it didn't turn out that way.

Lazy. Plain and simple. Most men don't approach. Rubbish dating and sex life. Notice a lot of young men are putting more time in trying to be pretty then actually approaching.

 

[IKO69]

You must go to a big city or give up all hope for a great sex life.

- on this point:

It was a nice day and so earlier I went out for a walk by the beach. Was out for about an hour and I got approving looks from 4 different women, young women in their 20's. You know it when you see it, as soon as you lock eyes with them and they instantly start fidgeting with their hair or something. Things are good, but yes this is only realistically possible if you live in a highly populated area. Some people don't have a choice in this matter but if you can, you do want to move to busier areas. If the pool is small, you are limited and often will have to be exceptional to stand out (women in those areas are probably looking outside where they live)

 

[DonJuanjr]

You must go to a big city or give up all hope for a great sex life.

- on this point:

It was a nice day and so earlier I went out for a walk by the beach. Was out for about an hour and I got approving looks from 4 different women, young women in their 20's. You know it when you see it, as soon as you lock eyes with them and they instantly start fidgeting with their hair or something. Things are good, but yes this is only realistically possible if you live in a highly populated area. Some people don't have a choice in this matter but if you can, you do want to move to busier areas. If the pool is small, you are limited and often will have to be exceptional to stand out (women in those areas are probably looking outside where they live)

I think the willingness to bang married chicks offsets this for those living in small populations.

 

[Jesse Pinkman]

mandatory bump for this after black pill content on the first page

 

[Hamurabimbi]

As I’ve gotten older, I’ve dialed back my ‘aggressiveness (for lack of a better term) with <25 yo. I definitely wait for signals from them first. I don’t want to be the ‘creepy old guy’.

 

[RBK]

It's because us 30+ year olds have **** to do and women isn't our top priority.

It really is easier now as @Soloman has said most men 30+ don't have their **** together. It's really not rocket science. Women want to be LED. All you really have to be at 30+ is fit, have a clean car, clean place for women to bring them back to, half decent job and be dominant but you should be doing these things anyway to advance in your life.

I think we get wrapped up in pursuing women because of our horniness when they should be 10% of what you're spending your time on. I've slept with FAR more women (28 and younger) in my 30s than I ever did in my 20s.

"You can lose a lot of money chasing women but you will never lose women chasing money".

 

[RBK]

You must go to a big city or give up all hope for a great sex life.

- on this point:

It was a nice day and so earlier I went out for a walk by the beach. Was out for about an hour and I got approving looks from 4 different women, young women in their 20's. You know it when you see it, as soon as you lock eyes with them and they instantly start fidgeting with their hair or something. Things are good, but yes this is only realistically possible if you live in a highly populated area. Some people don't have a choice in this matter but if you can, you do want to move to busier areas. If the pool is small, you are limited and often will have to be exceptional to stand out (women in those areas are probably looking outside where they live)

You're also in Miami, which is like the hotspot of the US right now for younger single women. As you mention this isn't the same effect someone in say Boisy Idaho is going to experience.

 

[IKO69]

You're also in Miami, which is like the hotspot of the US right now for younger single women. As you mention this isn't the same effect someone in say Boisy Idaho is going to experience.

Yes, those men are in an unfortunate situation. They could very well be doing the right things but their location severely restricts the numbers of opportunities they get. The solution is to get out of there but this sometimes isn't always possible due to various commitments.
I have discovered this to be the case some of the times with men who have discussed their troubles, but usually the anger/frustration is pointed inward, as if they are doing something wrong.

 

[Jesse Pinkman]

Miami does not need to get that overhyped on this thread. Outside of Brickell and South Beach, the entire city is h3ll for game. Perhaps Wynnwood can be decent but I'd say even that is overhyped.