Observations about college sex life from someone that went to a party school.

[SW15]

Back to school season

That's a good reason to bump this thread. Some regions aren't back to school until the Tuesday after Labor Day.

Depending on where in the U.S. you live, “back to school” means anytime from late July to after Labor Day

Most K-12 students at U.S. public schools have a school year of about 180 days, but when that year starts and ends varies substantially by region.

www.pewresearch.org

At my college, I found gameday to be more of a nuisance than anything.

TBH, I have been cvck blocked by a girl unable to find parking at my apartment due to a big game being the next morning.

Both college football and men's college basketball games tend to cause more logistical nightmares for the average student.

That sounds so bad for you. Was it a football or basketball game that caused the penis block?

 

[SW15]

The Boyfriend Problem

One of the reasons that college campuses do not live up to their pussie paradise reputation is because of 'The Boyfriend Problem'.

One of the things that is so great about being an undergraduate student between the ages of 18-23 on campus is that nearly everyone at the undergraduate level is unmarried. I have a note about graduate students at the end. It's supposed to be a fertile mating ground. It doesn't quite work out that way. While a college campus has more unmarried people than the suburbs of large city, this doesn't mean that much. At any given time, a lot of undergraduate have 'boyfriends' and are less likely to be receptive to approaches from strange men. They are not seeking new penis.

I was IHAB'ed the most at any phase of my life during my undergraduate years (2001-2005). In the last 10 years or so (I'm 40 right now), I have been IHAB'ed far less than I was then. I don't know how to explain this. The mating environment has changed since I was an undergraduate. I actually thought the IHAB was dead because I was rarely ever hearing it but watching some infields on YouTube showed the IHAB was still alive and well.

It didn't take me long on campus to observe 'The Boyfriend Problem'. I remember thinking it even in freshman and sophomore years.

The first few weeks of freshman year are important. Some female freshmen will arrive on campus with a boyfriend, but a lot of freshmen females don't arrive on campus with a boyfriend. In the first 4-6 weeks of school, everyone is targeting female freshmen. Freshmen males want them big time, but so do the sophomores, juniors, and seniors.

Fewer females than expected are open to receiving approaches because of 'The Boyfriend Problem'. This is part of why fewer men than expected experience college as a pussie paradise.

Did you experience 'The Boyfriend Problem' as an undergraduate student? Share your experiences here.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Quick note -- Graduate students tend to be married more often, but marriage rates among graduate students aren't all that high. Some graduate programs are students in their early to mid-20s immediately transitioning to graduate school after undergraduate. Master's of Business Administration (MBA) programs require some amount of work experience between undergraduate and graduate school. MBA students are typically 26-32, with median ages around 28-29. Because the MBA ecosystem is more 26-32 year olds, there will be some marrieds in the MBA social ecosystem.

 

[CornbreadFed]

Did you experience 'The Boyfriend Problem' as an undergraduate student? Share your experiences here.

Yes absolutely

 

[SW15]

Yes absolutely

It's good that I wasn't alone with that. What happened with you?

I arrived on campus and was expecting to be interacting with a bunch of motivated, unattached people. Instead, I found that a fair amount of undergrads weren't very receptive to new penis offers and that attachment rates seem very high when I was on campus. It seemed that most undergrad females were already attached by the time I noticed them, especially if I was interacting with them in an on campus, daygame-like setting like inside of my freshman year dorm building, within my classes, or even in the social areas adjacent to the on-campus library. It was a little less apparent at some of the off campus apartment building parties I attended, but still even a thing there.

 

[CornbreadFed]

It's good that I wasn't alone with that. What happened with you?

I arrived on campus and was expecting to be interacting with a bunch of motivated, unattached people. Instead, I found that a fair amount of undergrads weren't very receptive to new penis offers and that attachment rates seem very high when I was on campus. It seemed that most undergrad females were already attached by the time I noticed them, especially if I was interacting with them in an on campus, daygame-like setting like inside of my freshman year dorm building, within my classes, or even in the social areas adjacent to the on-campus library. It was a little less apparent at some of the off campus apartment building parties I attended, but still even a thing there.

I got by with one-night stands and dealing with dry spells. I would call College the Taxi Driver story of myself because I was deeply frustrated and lonely. Pretty similar reasons to what you described.

1). I was black in a predominantly white university which made it harder for me to advance any base with women. I had to always aim for the home run. I had to learn how to properly talk to women after college because of this.

2). Most of the decent women were in relationships. These relationships stemmed from commonalities such as a friend of a friend connections, same hometown, sister/brother fraternity & sorority, fame. Social Circle game was king in college, I found the lone wolf method to start surpassing social circle game around late twenties. At my university, there's like 3-5 counties where a lot of the students come from. If you came from these counties with a healthy social circle from high school, you were pretty much set up to win socially in college. My High School Senior Class sent around 40 students to my university which isn't a lot lol, and I was acquaintances at best with a handful of them. I was on talking terms with one of the girls, but it wasn't going to go anywhere because I was black & on a different path than her lol.

3). This left you with a lot of leftover 304s or future 304s to prospect. Putting a man in this situation in a college environment is pretty brutal and contributed to my frustration and resentment for women at the time. The example of a girl blowing another guy after class to come back and kiss you like nothing happened was a reality for guys trying to date these women. I caught so many of my friends girls or girls they were attempting to advance relationship with other dudes so many times that I learned that it wasn't even worth telling them lol.

 

[Millard Fillmore]

"Boyfriend" in college means jack shyt guys. We are talking about 18-22 year old women experiencing freedom for the first time. They snag boyfriends for the same old reasons but are quick to mess around.

 

[CornbreadFed]

"Boyfriend" in college means jack shyt guys. We are talking about 18-22 year old women experiencing freedom for the first time. They snag boyfriends for the same old reasons but are quick to mess around.

It depends on the girls you are dealing with. Future 304s are never going to have boyfriends or stay committed to anyone.

 

[Hal9000]

Yeah a college freshman female having a boyfriend, assuming he isn't on campus or otherwise near by, is the most likely kind of boyfriend to be gone within a few weeks.

These girls have never tried to make a long distance relationship work and now they are suddenly immersed in a giant party scene with better looking and smarter guys, with better career prospects, than the guys she left back home. It's almost always just a matter of time until she cheats and then moves on (they never break up with the guy before cheating).

If you're a college aged guy and letting an 18 year old with a boyfriend several hours away derail your attempts to get with a girl you need to reevaluate your strategy.

 

[SW15]

1). I was black in a predominantly white university which made it harder for me to advance any base with women. I had to always aim for the home run. I had to learn how to properly talk to women after college because of this.

I am a White male and there were far more White women at my university than non-White women. Your experience was different than my on campus experience.

2). Most of the decent women were in relationships. These relationships stemmed from commonalities such as a friend of a friend connections, same hometown, sister/brother fraternity & sorority, fame. Social Circle game was king in college, I found the lone wolf method to start surpassing social circle game around late twenties. At my university, there's like 3-5 counties where a lot of the students come from. If you came from these counties with a healthy social circle from high school, you were pretty much set up to win socially in college. My High School Senior Class sent around 40 students to my university which isn't a lot lol, and I was acquaintances at best with a handful of them. I was on talking terms with one of the girls, but it wasn't going to go anywhere because I was black & on a different path than her lol.

My university was more geographically diverse than your university. However, social circle tactics like what you described would have been effective at my university. I was running more of lone wolf style game at my university, which partially explains why I have the lone wolf as my avatar here. I didn't arrive at my university with a strong base of high school connections to draw upon and I decided not to go into Greek Life. That affected my college experience but I still managed to get laid in college. Even though I got laid, it was not the pussie paradise that I expected entering college.

3). This left you with a lot of leftover 304s or future 304s to prospect. Putting a man in this situation in a college environment is pretty brutal and contributed to my frustration and resentment for women at the time.

I did have sex with some leftover 304s or future 304s while I was in college. It was somewhat common to meet this type of woman at off campus apartment parties that weren't affiliated with Greek Life.

If you're a college aged guy and letting an 18 year old with a boyfriend several hours away derail your attempts to get with a girl you need to reevaluate your strategy.

That's true, but that was a minority of cases. The more common case is what I'll describe in a minute.

Yeah a college freshman female having a boyfriend, assuming he isn't on campus or otherwise near by, is the most likely kind of boyfriend to be gone within a few weeks.

These girls have never tried to make a long distance relationship work and now they are suddenly immersed in a giant party scene with better looking and smarter guys, with better career prospects, than the guys she left back home. It's almost always just a matter of time until she cheats and then moves on (they never break up with the guy before cheating).

The more common cases for girls with boyfriends on campus were as follows....

1. Women who early in freshman year either got into new relationships in the first weeks of school or were attending the same college as their high school boyfriends. Long distance boyfriends weren't that much of an issue for me.

2. 2nd semester freshman year - senior year women who had already established on campus boyfriends.

The women with long distance boyfriends usually saw those evaporate by the end of first semester.

 

[CornbreadFed]

Yeah a college freshman female having a boyfriend, assuming he isn't on campus or otherwise near by, is the most likely kind of boyfriend to be gone within a few weeks.

These girls have never tried to make a long distance relationship work and now they are suddenly immersed in a giant party scene with better looking and smarter guys, with better career prospects, than the guys she left back home. It's almost always just a matter of time until she cheats and then moves on (they never break up with the guy before cheating).

If you're a college aged guy and letting an 18 year old with a boyfriend several hours away derail your attempts to get with a girl you need to reevaluate your strategy.

My university was more geographically diverse than your university. However, social circle tactics like what you described would have been effective at my university. I was running more of lone wolf style game at my university, which partially explains why I have the lone wolf as my avatar here. I didn't arrive at my university with a strong base of high school connections to draw upon and I decided not to go into Greek Life. That affected my college experience but I still managed to get laid in college. Even though I got laid, it was not the pussie paradise that I expected entering college.

It's not even just about Greek Life, but that mattered a lot too. If you came from a high school in the top 3 counties, you were pretty much set up with a network and a leg in into top row fraternities/sororities. You more than likely knew a group of sophomores/juniors or had a friend that had connections. I got in mine because the President of my fraternity went to my high school and they he opened an avenue for us. Fraternities and Sororities still have cliques/factions with in them, so getting in to one doesn't mean you are going to reap the social benefits. Going back to what I started, these students just didn't have the incentives to go out and meet new people because their network was already there. I am sure if you have the right personality then avenues would've been opened up for you regardless, but I didn't have that juice lol.

I am also aware that every university is differet too. I regret choosing the college path I chose to take as a naive 18 year old male lol.

 

[SW15]

If you came from a high school in the top 3 counties, you were pretty much set up with a network. You more than likely knew a group of sophomores/juniors or had a friend that had connections. Going back to what I started, these students just didn't have the incentives to go out and meet new people because their network was already there. I am sure if you have the right personality then avenues would've been opened up for you regardless, but I didn't have that juice lol.

What you describe in this quote is common for in-state students at a good portion of large public universities.

I'm not going to name my "Hot Girl U" school here, but @Jesse Pinkman already named University of Georgia as his alma mater earlier in the thread so we'll use University of Georgia as an example for the point I'll make. University of Georgia is a good example for this.

At University of Georgia, if you went to high school in the Atlanta area, you're likely to enter college with a strong social network, regardless of whether or not you join Greek Life. You don't really need to expand your social circle too much as a UGA student with an Atlanta background.

Now, let's say you went to high school in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania and you're going to University of Georgia. The guy from Harrisburg is going to have a more difficult time socially at University of Georgia. He might be the only person from his Harrisburg high school at University of Georgia. The most common destination for his Harrisburg high school classmates that go to college would be Penn State University. He might get into a decent frat at UGA if he's a 6'0"+ guy with big muscles. If he doesn't join a frat, he's going to have to rely upon extracurricular activity groups, approaching in classes, approaching in his dorm as a freshman, and approaching at off campus apartment parties until he turns 21 in his junior year. That's a much more difficult social path. It would be an easier social path if he were 6'0"+ with big muscles, but still more challenging than a socially well connected guy from the Atlanta suburbs.

It's not even just about Greek Life, but that mattered a lot too.....leg in into top row fraternities/sororities. I got in mine because the President of my fraternity went to my high school and they he opened an avenue for us.

Fraternities and Sororities still have cliques/factions with in them, so getting in to one doesn't mean you are going to reap the social benefits.

This one is very school dependent. Some schools are far more Greek Life oriented than others. The University of Georgia example above is an example of a school that is very Greek Life oriented.

 

[Jesse Pinkman]

I look back on this thread and my college days and compare them to now only to come away with one common lesson. No matter what stage of life you are in whether it is high school, college, or the real world, it is always a small group of guys getting the women and doing well with dating.

The only difference is that in many ways in high school and college, it is kind of out of your hand for the most part. The guy with the rich and laid back parents is almost always going to be the one getting laid. Meanwhile, the guy with the strict or poor parents is usually going to struggle unless he plays the drug dealer angle (in before @BillyPilgrim joke). It is why people tend to look back on high school and college with such hype, everything is sort of set in stone and people usually accept their lot in life without much to do about it.

In college, you can do more than in high school to better your chances. You can get a job as a bartender at the college bars or do cold approach to a degree if you go to a big enough school, ideally at night since day is awkward.

However, once you grow out of college and go into the real world, it is more in your hands. Your parents' money and old networks do not save you as much. I have known so many college dudes who try to cling on to Greek Life after graduation and look pathetic doing so, everyone finds them irritating.

After college, the guys who kill it with game are those who put the work in someway and somehow. It becomes more objective and less nuanced and subjective. Your Greek Letters do not save you or even mean jack anymore unless you are in some backwards city.

Cold approach, status game where you do not play anyone and must network with them, and looking your best for the apps are what saves you.

I think this is why so many College guys who did alright in school burn out and crash hard after graduation. Nothing is ever given to you anymore, you have to earn it. Plus, the city you pick is more important than the college you pick.

 

[Millard Fillmore]

It depends on the girls you are dealing with. Future 304s are never going to have boyfriends or stay committed to anyone.

They are mostly all wild at that age. Even the quiet ones. Unless you're at one of those bible banging schools. (And even then.)

A boyfriend in college is just a fukk buddy between study sessions.

 

[SW15]

In college, you can do more than in high school to better your chances. You can get a job as a bartender at the college bars or do cold approach to a degree if you go to a big enough school, ideally at night since day is awkward.

With the changes in the bar scene in the last 10 years due to swipe apps and social media DMs, do you think bartender jobs are as effective as they once were? I'm wondering how applicable this would be for college students in 2023.

A boyfriend in college is just a fukk buddy between study sessions.

This is valid. Most college-formed relationships fail within 2-5 years of graduation. Most people are not marrying their college girlfriends. Even if they are marrying their college girlfriends, there's a good chance that marriage will fail.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

I don't have time for jokes Jesse. I'm busy working.

 

[SW15]

Myron dropped some gems about college campus sex life in the thread below. These gems reflect things said throughout this thread.

Myron "only the Top 10-20% of guys on campuses are smashing"

Myron's experience was similar to the experiences of men who have commented in this thread.

Outside of the Top 10-20% of men on campuses, these are men who are either virtually ignored by most college females or they get some unremarkable girlfriend in order to get sex.

 

[CornbreadFed]

I haven't listened to it yet, but I feel like Myron is a brilliant guy caught up on a gimmick for money. He is too smart to believe the majority of the BS he spews out.

 

[SW15]

I haven't listened to it yet, but I feel like Myron is a brilliant guy caught up on a gimmick for money. He is too smart to believe the majority of the BS he spews out.

Myron has said that he read "The Rational Male" and he thought it was a valuable read.

 

[CornbreadFed]

Myron has said that he read "The Rational Male" and he thought it was a valuable read.

I haven't read the rational male, and I don't have a negative opinion in tbh. I am mainly talking about his absolute claims like the majority of college girls in the university of Iowa being flown out to Dubai lol.

 

[SW15]

I am mainly talking about his absolute claims like the majority of college girls in the university of Iowa being flown out to Dubai lol.

Most college women from basic public universities are not being flown out to Dubai.