Not sure if this girl is interested

[Stringer_Bell213]

Ok so I met this girl off online off of pof, she messaged me and then we just chatted for the last week or so through bbm.

Anyways we go out for coffee we talk for a bit and we both agree we had a good time meeting each other right.

Ok so she texts me the same day and day after anyways I text her yesterday asking her if she would like to go out for dinner. She say yes she would be but sometime next week and we'll decide on a date closer to then.

Ok so afterwords she asks me what I'm looking for I say I'm looking to date someone and see were it goes. So then I ask her and she says she doesn't know and that she's not really feeling relationships right now.

So after this I say that's cool but let's go out for dinner take it slow and see where things go and then she's like ok cool and we've talked a bit since then but not a lot.

So any idea what you guys think this means?

 

[runner83]

Did you get physical with her in any way on the date? If not, I think you chumped out and blew it.

Read the 2 strikes rule:

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=154043

Ask her out one more time (but for gawd's sake do something different to dinner).

Either she won't accept = she isn't interested.

If she DOES accept, escalate physically and grow some balls.

 

[Stringer_Bell213]

Ok so it was just a coffee date in the mall and no I didnt get physical at all with her but there wasn't really an opportunity for that the best I could have gotten was a hug.

So yeah I'm suppose to go out with her for dinner sometime next week but we haven't a picked date yet.

So any idea what she meant when she told me she's not sure what she wants and isn't really feeling relationships right now?

Like does that mean I have a small chance cuz she didn't exactly say she's looking for friends or to be just be friends but she didn't say she wants t date either so do I have a chance?

Also since I told her we can take it slow should I still try to make a move on her when we go out for dinner? I'm thinking I should but not sure.

 

[runner83]

Ok so it was just a coffee date in the mall and no I didnt get physical at all with her but there wasn't really an opportunity for that the best I could have gotten was a hug.

So yeah I'm suppose to go out with her for dinner sometime next week but we haven't a picked date yet.

Dinner / coffee is not a good idea - try to think of something else with more opportunity to get physical, preferably with a few drinks.

So any idea what she meant when she told me she's not sure what she wants and isn't really feeling relationships right now?

Like does that mean I have a small chance cuz she didn't exactly say she's looking for friends or to be just be friends but she didn't say she wants t date either so do I have a chance?

Do you think she would have said this if she was into you big time and wanted to jump your bones?

I interpret it as a sign of low interest and lack of attraction.

But interpreting women based on what they say is a waste of time. Read this: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=181826

The only way to judge a girl is by her actions. And you will only know about that once you ask her out.

Also since I told her we can take it slow should I still try to make a move on her when we go out for dinner? I'm thinking I should but not sure.

There 3 likely scenarios:

- You don't make a move, she "friend zones" you
- You do make a move, she "friend zones" you
- You do make a move, she goes along with it

I'm assuming you want this girl for more than friends? If so, you must make a move.

As I said above, ignore what she said. Focus only on her actions.

Nothing is certain, but at least if you go for it, you are in with a chance. Good luck!

 

[Stringer_Bell213]

Alright thanks a lot guys for the awesome advice def helps with my piece of mind lol I really needed that . So I'm gonna try to stop over analyzing this stuff and just try to go with it, set up a date and make a move.


Right now I already asked her for dinner but yeah I think I would now prefer to go out to a bar with her instead that way we can get drinks rather than eat although I know she isn't a big drinker so that might be tough to get her to do.


And honestly I would love to take her to an amusement park since I actually took another girl to one in october and that worked out really well but I checked and they're closed until may which doesn't really help. I also can't bring her back to my place since I live with my parents so that's out of the question.

So any other suggestions? Otherwise I'll try to get her to go to a bar instead of dinner or maybe see if she wants to go play bowling or pool instead and try to get her to drink with me before we play lol.

 

[Stringer_Bell213]

Ok yeah I'm 24 and she's 23 but yeah I can't bring over to my house, My parents are indian so I don't like them to meet any potential girls otherwise they get ideas into her head and this girl brown too.

So I live in Vancouver and the weather here is terrible its all cold and rainy which makes going for a walk outside a little tricky but we have been getting a little more sun lately, so maybe if I'm lucky we can meet on a day that doesn't have miserable weather.

So where I was planning on seducing her would be my car lol, it's pretty much the only option I really have atm and it's worked before I doubt she would be too offended by that.

So yeah the only thing I can think of is go dt maybe walk around there for abit, go for drinks and try to make a move then or maybe just go bowling or play pool which would keep us moving and could be fun, especially if I grab some liquor and we drink beforehand.

 

[Chickfight]

You need a complete mentality sweep my friend, but that's not easy. You gotta follow the advice people here give you no matter how hard it seems, so once you do it becomes internalized and a part of you. Playing it "safe" is the worst things you can do when it comes to women.

Don't worry about what she thinks of you. Don't compartmentalize you hanging out with her as a "coffee date" or a "dinner date" or even a "date". It limits you to the restrictions your mind has placed on those categories. When she's with you, it can go any where you want. If she gets cold feet. Accept it graciously and tell her you'll call her. She'll wish she had stayed and be excited for your call.

There's something I like to call the privacy factor. The less people are around the more intimate it gets. Start off somewhere with a lot of people around and keep bouncing to places with less people around as her comfort increases, eventually ending up at your/her place.

Think of asking her out as inviting her into your world, your reality. THIS is what women want and it's your job as a man to lead her through it. Make sure YOU'RE having fun and she will love it. Isn't that perfect? You just do whatever the hell you want, have fun and not care what anybody thinks and that's what's attractive. How easy is that.

 

[Stringer_Bell213]

Thigns went sour

Ok so I thought I'd give an update this chick ended up being a total bust and a total b**ch. I feel so crushed too for some reason like I haven't even been talking to her but I felt os lead on and she seems like a total cold b**ch. So we were suppose to meet up tonight and I didn't hear form so I text her and she's like I got called in to work which is clearly bs cuz she texts me back quite abit during this short time right. Anyways she's like sorry for cancelling and that I should be going out with u since I'm seeing some guy I'm like what were did this come from. She was also like I just want to have fun but dont want to date or have a relationship I'm like ok just let me take u out or something and she's like no its not fair to this guy or me. So then I tell if ur not interested just tell me and then she like I'M NOT INTERESTED GOT IT!!!! I'm like ok got it and then like such a b**ch she's like rogher that and then she deletes me off bbm.

I dont know why I just feel crushed from this more then usual too and I know I probably came off as a AFC but I've been good at handling rejection lately too so don't know why this was so bad. so I've had a couple of shots of bicardi too lol which has def helped.

I'm so tempted to send her one last text and call her cold but I dont know if I will.

 

[Stringer_Bell213]

Yeah I guess ur right but damn I dont know why this is bugging me more than usual. Maybe ur right I just can't think properly right now and in a couple of days it'll be better. Yeah I def haven't texted her like I had this bad message typed out where I was gonna say she was cold and everything but I never sent it.

So what happened was when she was like I'm working she ended up being like I'm already seeing someone else and he wouldn't feel comfortable with me going out with another guy which is the usual bs and she never even mentioned this guy before. I also gave her a chance to you know let me down last week when I asked her out which makes it more annoying and I felt like she lead me on abit.

I do agree that I definitely reacted I just wasn't expecting it.

Oh well what can I do now except move on. I feel so frustrated right now though I feel like maybe I need a break from chicks or something.