Not sure if I got rejected or not

[FeelsGoodBro]

I work part time at a large store, this isn't a serious job, dating within the store happens and is allowed. (before everyone says - don't **** where you eat)

For a while I was pretty reserved at this job with the people outside of my department. Just because of the drama possibly involved. But, over the past month or so have been open/chatty/flirty with the females at this place.

There is one girl in specific who I have targeted and focused on busting her balls and flirting with her. She was very shy at first almost like she was intimidated by me. She is always joking about me being in her department, saying she is going to get me in trouble, smiling, laughing, and for a while in the beginning I could tell she was nervous around me. Now, whenever I see her she is smiling and instantly starts making a joke with me.

After a few weeks of IOIs, I felt pretty good about eventually approaching her for a number close when the time was right. But, we don't work near each other and only see each other a few times a day for a small brief period. Anyways, before work one day, I saw her in the break room and walked into the break room. Sat next to her and opened with something like,

"You always look so nervous around me, so, I figured I would make you uncomfortable."

She laughed / and made some joke back. Was smiling at me, etc.

She is french and offered me something a piece of something she was eating. I replied to her in French (I know very little -- used to date a French girl) and she was shocked that I knew some French (DHV). Her eyes lit up like a x-mas tree.

I joke and tell her that my French is excellent. She then in turn asks me a question in French, I laugh and tell her I have no idea what she just said. She then tells me in English, she asked what time I was working until. She then while in the process of getting up to leave tells me to put a sentence together in French.

In French, I say, "Will you go out with me?" She turns bright red and looks shocked. And replies, What did you say?

I repeat it and she is still in the process of walking away and says, "I don't know what that means!" and leaves.

I didn't see her the rest of the day and didn't work for 3-4 days after this. I saw her recently and approached her and she instantly made a joke and was smiling and very flirty with me again. She asked me something and I replied with, "I don't know what that means" she started giggling.

How do I proceed w/ this? Continue the flirtatious behavior and go for a number close? Do I wait a little bit to do this?

 

[bankai]

Honestly, how good is your french? It's easy to butcher a sentence if you don't have the right grammar/accent.

 

[FeelsGoodBro]

It's possible it was butchered, but I am not sure.

Her response made it seem like I said it correctly. She turned red and looked in shock.

I am not sure, consider both perspectives for that response, how do I proceed?

 

[loveshogun]

Yeah. What did you try to say? I'm pretty fluent, so you might wanna post what you said, or as close to it as possible.

I'd say for now, stick to English for asking her out. I don't think you're quite out of the game yet. A girl who is interested will forgive 1 "mistake," and yours hardly counts.

Would help to know what you said, though. If it was something along the lines of "Je veux te prendre par derrière," that might be worthy of some blushing - and if she's still talking to you after that, congrats - you're in like Flynt!

 

[FeelsGoodBro]

Veux-tu sortir avec moi .. Possible it was butchered.

Assuming it was and wasn't:

She has continued her flirtatious behavior. How do I proceed? How quickly do I ask for her number, in English this time?

If she did reject me, I doubt she would openly flirt with me like that post the French ask out. Especially, since it's a work environment.

 

[Chickfight]

yeah, in my opinion she's in to you. Don't waste any more time and just ask her out in english this time.

 

[Igetit!]

Let me point out a few things I noticed here. Tell me if you notice any patterns or not.

There is one girl in specific who I have targeted and focused on busting her balls and flirting with her. She was very shy at first almost like she was intimidated by me. She is always jokingabout me being in her department, saying she is going to get me in trouble, smiling, laughing, and for a while in the beginning I could tell she was nervous around me. Now, whenever I see her she is smiling and instantly starts making a joke with me.

After a few weeks of IOIs, I felt pretty good about eventually approaching her for a number close when the time was right. But, we don't work near each other and only see each other a few times a day for a small brief period. Anyways, before work one day, I saw her in the break room and walked into the break room. Sat next to her and opened with something like,

"You always look so nervous around me, so, I figured I would make you uncomfortable."

She laughed / and made some joke back.Was smiling at me, etc.

She is french and offered me something a piece of something she was eating. I replied to her in French (I know very little -- used to date a French girl) and she was shocked that I knew some French (DHV). Her eyes lit up like a x-mas tree.

I joke and tell her that my French is excellent. She then in turn asks me a question in French, I laugh and tell her I have no idea what she just said. She then tells me in English, she asked what time I was working until. She then while in the process of getting up to leave tells me to put a sentence together in French.

In French, I say, "Will you go out with me?" She turns bright red and looks shocked. And replies, What did you say?

I repeat it and she is still in the process of walking away and says, "I don't know what that means!" and leaves.

I didn't see her the rest of the day and didn't work for 3-4 days after this. I saw her recently and approached her and she instantly made a joke and was smiling and very flirty with me again. She asked me something and I replied with, "I don't know what that means" she started giggling.

Dude,your whole "relationship" with this girl is one big JOKE,and that's being SERIOUS. If you don't stop tapdancing and playing around,you'll become the latest victim of the friendzone.


In fact,there's a GOOD CHANCE that you already are.


All you two do is joke with each other,that's the comfort level she has with you. I bet if you were to STOP JOKING and get serious with her,she'd probably freak out.



You couldn't even stop kidding around long enough to SERIOUSLY ask her out,I mean you asked her out in a jokingly manner,asking her out in French.


Dating and having sex is nothing to joke around about. It's serious because it's two people entering into each other's lives. So now,because of all this joking and playing around you did,you have a EXTRA hurdle to overcome.


If you do ask her out again,and I mean SERIOULSY ask her out,don't be surprised or shocked if she responds by making a joke. I mean,if the last 50 times she's interacted with you were nothing but joking and playing around,why would she think #51 would be any different?



As far as whether or not she rejected you,hey,I don't know,too much playing around between you two to tell.



I like what Chickfight said about not wasting anymore time and simply just asking her out in english. You mentioned something in your post about getting WEEKS of IOIs from her. WEEKS????? And I suppose that while all these "weeks" of IOIs were going on,you were continually joking,teasing and playing around with her while NOT asking her out.



You're probably in the friendzone dude. Go ahead and try Chickfight's suggestion anyway,but it's probably too late though.

 

[FeelsGoodBro]

I like what Chickfight said about not wasting anymore time and simply just asking her out in english. You mentioned something in your post about getting WEEKS of IOIs from her. WEEKS????? And I suppose that while all these "weeks" of IOIs were going on,you were continually joking,teasing and playing around with her while NOT asking her out.

By weeks I mean a few encounters. I work two shifts a week. It's a part time job like I mentioned and so does she as far as my knowledge. So, I saw her like 2-3 times during that "weeks" period. And we do not work in the same department. When I see her, it is for 2-3 minutes at a time, a few times a day.

And yes, there is a lot of teasing, by joking I mean her telling me things like,

"You're mean"

And me telling her things like,

"You're like my fourth favorite person in this department."

I think it's possible w/ all the teasing I do that she may have not been sure if I was serious or not.

Pretty much every chick at this job flirts with me. I am going to start plowing through them. I have a list.

 

[Iceberg]

I agree with Chickfight and IGetIt.

You're wasting all this time reading signs and s**t. All this talk about "Her eyes lit up" "She blushed." "She seems nervous around me."....I seriously can't think of the last time that I even thought about those things.

You're spending too much time trying to be charming/witty. All this time you've spent strategizing as if you're planning to invade Normandy, you could have asked her out and gotten the "yes" or "no" answer you've been wondering about.

And this is just my personal thing, but I think the "will you go out with me" thing sounds too serious. Some of these chicks are too shy, and will get scared off by the word "DATE". Typically, I'd just ask them to come with me for drinks, and take it from there.

 

[ChalengeGuyFan]

lol, Igetit! You are usually spot-on, but this time you couldn't be more wrong.

OP, dude, this girl likes you! She is into you!
I've been in this kind of a situation countless times before; this is how nice girls behave when they have the hots for a guy.

Her being into you, you now have to get into her (literally), therefore you should ask her out, go for a kiss (even if the timing/situation isn't perfect), slap her ass or anything that advances things.

Do something or she'll lose interest and you will be left with you **** in your hand and will regret things (like me...)

Grab them balls and do something!

 

[Chickfight]

And this is just my personal thing, but I think the "will you go out with me" thing sounds too serious. Some of these chicks are too shy, and will get scared off by the word "DATE". Typically, I'd just ask them to come with me for drinks, and take it from there.

Agreed, I never actually say DATE or "go out with me". It puts too much pressure on the interaction. I usually just say hang out.

 

[CantTouchMyStyle]

I'd be a little surprised if she didn't want your nuts at this point. Just judging by the dialogue you have given.

If she wants your nuts as I expect, I bet she is kicking herself for not replying to your question when you asked her in French.

good luck OP.

I am hoping this thread is bumped in a week or so and you actually banged her.

 

[teddy240]

Make it seem like it was meant to be, girls love the disney movie fantasy of meeting/hooking up. The more natural your hook up, the better

 

[Johnnyventana]

Maybe you accidentally said, "Eat my arse!" That would make her blush, I'm sure. The point being you may have made her blush because of something else.

 

[FeelsGoodBro]

lol, Igetit! You are usually spot-on, but this time you couldn't be more wrong.

OP, dude, this girl likes you! She is into you!
I've been in this kind of a situation countless times before; this is how nice girls behave when they have the hots for a guy.

Her being into you, you now have to get into her (literally), therefore you should ask her out, go for a kiss (even if the timing/situation isn't perfect), slap her ass or anything that advances things.

Do something or she'll lose interest and you will be left with you **** in your hand and will regret things (like me...)

Grab them balls and do something!

Thanks, I am going to the next time I see her at work.

I am not worried about advancing things once we get out, just finding the right opportunity at work to ask her out / for her number.

When I run into her, she is usually around customers so it's awkward.

 

[FeelsGoodBro]

This is a lot harder than it looks.

Every time I see this girl we are surrounded by other employees or customers. We can't even have a conversation.

Do I just have to man up and get her number in front of a customer?

Any idea's?

 

[PapiChulo]

If you get anything other than Yes it's a rejection for Now. Also don't ask women to hang out with you, because it entails too many connotations such as friendship, etc. I ve made that mistake with women before. Tell her it's a date, not friends getting a drink together. Women are stupid this way and are used to guys wanting to "hang out", you gotta set the frame right there. Some of them will ask you what you mean by hanging out. At least they ask me because they know what to expect. I simply tell them that I would like to go out with them or one of them things where I ask them to join me for something. I don't see how it puts pressure on them. P.S. Have something in mind and tell her you will need the digits to set it up. The other thing is that you have to calibrate your directness and seriousness, you don't wanna scare her off. That's why it's advisable to state your intentions as early on as possible, clearly, so there is no second guessing and no need for her to act surprised.Also the longer you hold off the more AW she becomes. They develope "feelings" for you - the need for attention. If you do it quickly you avoid all that freaking drama real and the rejection is a lot easier than having to be rejected after 2 months of this stuff.

 

[ChalengeGuyFan]

This is a lot harder than it looks.

Every time I see this girl we are surrounded by other employees or customers. We can't even have a conversation.

Do I just have to man up and get her number in front of a customer?

Any idea's?

Yes: I have the idea that, since 8 days passed and you didn't do anything, you are now making up excuses for not being brave enough to ask her out.

Asking her out in front of the customers is ridiculous*, if you ask me, and I highly doubt that there was not _one_ chance when customers were not around.
(*) because this may be one of those times when people do something else and are simply detached from things like 'sex'.


Always remember that:

1. there is no perfect opportunity

2. asking out a girl, although it may be scary, is not anything of major importance. You could well be "just another guy" in their lives.

3. not being 100% liked is also without importance. There are big losers out there who, although full of flaws, make girls happy. If they can, despite being far from perfect, so can you.

4. if you are calm and laid back 100% of the time you will go unnoticed. Make girls feel happy, embarrassed, sexy, _uncomfortable_ (in a good way). etc. and you will be someone. Start by advancing things and by asking her out when she doesn't expect it. Or go unnoticed. This is the golden rule of socializing & of getting girls.