Not a freestyler...

[Phaint]

I've always had this problem and it really sucks. It doesn't matter if I am talking to an UG1 or HB10 or just friends of mine, but I suck for some reason at saying sh1t on the spot compared to thinking it over.

If you say an insult to me, I basically can only say fvck you or something along those lines because I can't for the life of me think up something on the spot to comeback with. Then I can sit and think for a bit and come up with 90 things I could've said. That's one of reasons I fvcked up big time with this girl I was talking to, I would say something stupid as a response to one of her questions when I could have said something 20x better.

As a comparison, 2pac was a badass rapper but he had to go home and think and write down his lyrics to make the truly badass sh1t. Biggie Smalls on the other hand could just bust out with sh1t out of thin air and freestye.

Problem with me is I have to think of sh1t to say the good sh1t and when it comes to b1tches and being a DJ you need to bust out with the good sh1t on the spot that'll make em wet. Any tips on how to get over this would be very helpful.

 

[Walken]

What are you thinking about in the moment? "What do I say? What do I say? What do they want me to say?" Something like that? Tell me in your own words.

 

[Heizen]

Hindsight is always 20/20, dont beat yourself up over it.

 

[Phaint]

I don't really think of anything during an actual moment like that. I basically just say some crap out of reflex that sounds retarded. It basically happens so fast I don't think just react.

I guess I could be thinking "I need to come up with something to say to counter his/her comment" if anything.

 

[NoBull]

I guess I could be thinking "I need to come up with something to say to counter his/her comment" if anything.

By the time you're done "thinking" that, the conversation would have moved on, lol.

You need to be observative, from the time you see the person, pick on all his insecurities, look at all the flows in his dressing style (I realized that afro-americans do this a lot, "Yo, i didn't know walmart sold fake timberlands, yo style be wack. my shoes cost more than your whole outfit, YO!" )

Exaggerate.

Be creative.

 

[Walken]

Hmmm. I used have problem kinda like yours. Buddism helps alot.
You can center your mind and learn to just be, my life has changed completely since I started medditating. You can find alot of info online. You can also look at books about the mental disiplines of warriors, samurais to the Modern American Millitary Machine.

It's important to have your mind in the present. If you spend alot of time alone your mind starts to wander around thinking about other things. It's instinctive for people to want to be around other people and if you're alone alot you mind hates it and decided to be somewhere else.

Creative thoughts start rolling in, odd abstract thoughts. You become a perfectionist, you can rewrite your emails and posts over and over again until they're just the way you want them. Most people don't use this backwards thinking and don't hold their conversations in this manner, so naturally you may have trouble addapting.

If this sounds like you, your diagnosis is that you have been too isolated for too long. Your remedy: drown yourself in other people. You have to re/addapt to being around people. Do you live alone or with your parents and spend most of your time in your room? That ain't gonna work out of you. Move out and get a roommate.

Everytime your mind start's float around with all the infinite possiblities of the univers shake your head, bring yourself back to now. Clap your hands. Call a friend and bull**** for 2 minutes about what happend today/yesterday.

And don't worry about what you say. We've been conditioned to be so much older then we are and to act like we've learned lesson when we really haven't. Be brash, yell, say something stupid for a laugh. You're friends like you. They like you when you don't say a word. Think how much they'll like you when you just start talking and send out a couple laughs(it's true, my status has gone straight up since doing this).

THe most laughs I get from people is when I don't plan what I'm going to say. I just let my mouth open knowing the only opinions I'm going to express are my own. And after they laugh they tell me I'm smart. When I plan out something to say, and I think it's a really funny joke, no one gets it. When I try to be funny I come of looking stupid.

Don't try, don't act, just be at peace with yourself. You're better then you know.

Keeping your mind in the present is like any other self improvement task, it takes lots of effort and time. Just remember there is only this moment. And in this moment, is your whole life.

 

[MackJr]

Two things:

1) You don't need a comeback for every line. Just be confident and cool and that will get you through the conversation.

2) if you want to get better at on-the spot talking, practice scenarios. For example, pretend that someone just said, "Your mother's ugly". Then make a up a response on the spot. Do this several times and try different responses until you find one that lets you look cool in the end.

that technique also helps you do encounters. you practice how you react to happy women, sad women, angry women, interested women, etc. this gets you mentally ready for different situations.

 

[AMF]

Just wanted to pay some dues to your post Walken... i think the diagnosis could apply to a LOT of guys here... this is a website full of keyboard jockeys... infact whether the people here are out practicing is irrelevant: this site is ANTI-social.

your actions must lead your thoughts and not the other way round.

 

[Walken]

Thanks AMF. I've been wanting to write something about conditioning/social behavior/programing since I found this place and this was an ideal oppertunitty. THough I am still thinking about writing about the condtioning affects of television and perhaps something about knowing one's self.

 

[TheInfamousCBear]

My mother told me to use body language to show people how you want them to treat you...If you cant think of insults that quick, use body language to show people that you are not a game to be played...Works for me, I havent been insulted in years...