MaDsKaTeR212's Guide to Improvement
So here you are. You’re really disappointed with yourself but are already on your way to self improvement, you just don’t know where to start. So I’m going to break it down for you and try to help you out.
People say to be yourself. I say progress yourself.
#1 – APPEARANCE
There is only one excuse I would accept if someone claimed they weren’t wearing clothing they thought represented how they wanted other people to see them, if they were unable to get that clothing (due to money problems, etc). There is almost always a way to dress that people will like and see your personality stand out. If someone accused me of stereotyping someone because of how they looked, and if my opinion was based on clothing, they would have no justifiable position. The way people present themselves is chosen by them.
Category A – Clothing
I’m going to talk about your clothing. Clothing is an extremely important part of how you look. Try going through a couple magazines with models and see what they’re wearing. Look at some of the popular people you know. Try some of it. If you like how something looks on someone, see if it looks good on you. You have to experiment.
Things of importance:
-Color
If you wear all black, you might get second looks from people (bad ones). If you wear completely opposite colors, chances are it will look fine to most people now-a-days. If you wear pink stripes and purple polka dots, chances are it’s not going to go over too well. Pick colors that stand out, but aren’t ugly looking. Ask people for their opinions.
-Size
This is really important. DO NOT worry about something being too small, and getting something 2 sizes bigger than you need. Tight clothes look OK while exceedingly loose clothes make you look scrawny and poor. Try it on, if it’s hard to move in its too tight, and if a shirt goes down to your knees or pants can’t stay up without a belt then it’s too loose.
-Style
Style is definitely a biggie. It represents your uniqueness, how you’re different from everyone else. There are a lot of different ways to dress commonly known by people. Prep (becoming popular), Punk, Goth (generally disliked), whatever you would consider Fubu (what a lot of black people wear), 70s, 80s, you name it. Try to pick something that matches your personality/lifestyle.
-Shoes
Shoes make more a difference than a lot of people think. Good, clean shoes are great. Don’t go for the cheap $20 Nikes, try something a little better quality and sharp looking. Shoes, as with everything, should represent how highly you think of yourself. These should match your style too.
Category B – Accessories
Things such as rings, necklaces, piercings (to a limit), chains, belts, etc can make a difference. They are the bells and whistles. They can be expensive, but don’t have to be.
-Rings and piercings
One or two rings can be a bonus, pick them wisely. Mostly anything made for men will probably be ok to wear if it didn’t cost 50 cents. Piercings… depending on your style, eyebrow, nose, and tongue etc piercings can be ok. If you pierce your ears it will probably look fine, but make sure you get something that looks good.
-Watch
A watch isn’t a bad idea. Just get a decent one, you’ll know when you see it if it will look good. There is a lot to choose from.
-Necklace
I couldn’t really tell you much for this one, except to see what other people out there are wearing and what looks good with your style.
Category C – Hygiene and Body
It is very important that you are clean, and in good shape. You want to make sure you don’t smell awful, or have hair down to your knees (unless you’re into that...).
-Hair
Make sure your hair is neat and you have a definite thing going. If you want it long, make sure you know exactly how it’s going to be, don’t just let it grow out and leave it, it looks sloppy and lazy. Cut it pretty short if you want minimal work and still have it look good. Gel is in today, girls like seeing that you have effort to take care of yourself so it helps. If you have the right build, shaving your head might do wonders for you. If you’re kind of tall and have certain features, long curly hair might work really well. It all depends on the person, and what you want. Ask people, play around a bit, go to a stylist.
-Skin
If you have acne, I recommend www.acne.org. It has helped me TREMENDOUSLY, and many people are really surprised by how well the regimen over there works. You have to be committed to it, and it will probably help. Go there for more info. Other options are definitely a dermatologist. You have to try things to find an answer. Skin texture is also important, and how tan it is. If you’re really white then get a tan. If your skin is really dry, get lotion. For your face, make sure you shave unless you are going for a certain look. If you want a goatee, then go for it! Just don't let it get shabby.
-Nails
Cut them. That’s about it.
-Teeth
If they aren’t straight, braces. That’s all you need. It’s expensive but the effects are really great. If they aren’t white, BRUSH THEM REGULARLY. Two minutes a day. Time it. If you need to make them white, try those white strip things; otherwise ask your dentist what he can do. Teeth are what a smile is all about, and a smile is all about showing how friendly you are.
-Build
We have a whole health and fitness forum for this. Workout, and look there for advice on how. If you gain muscle, you’ll look better, plain and simple. Just don't look scrawny, and you'll be fine. Unless you're a dedicated bodybuilder (in which case you'll know this already), you cant have too much muscle.
-Smell
Shower at least once a day, twice if you get all sweaty etc. Change your sheets on your bed regularly. Brush your teeth. Wash your clothes. This should get rid of bad smells, to add good smells use cologne.
-Voice
If you have an annoying voice (ask people trust me, you don’t know how your voice really sounds, or you can also record yourself) then start singing along with different types of music try to train your voice. Do a search (www.google.com). This mostly only applies if you have a voice that stands out negatively. If you have a bad laugh, try to control it a little.
-Posture
This is very important. Get someone to record you (or do it yourself) walking around or doing something. See if you walk weird, sit weird, bend over weird etc. Try holding your shoulders low and back. Let your arms swing NATURALLY. Don’t make your steps too big or small. Keep your chin up. And don’t overdo any of it, it’s very obvious.
#2 – PERSONALITY
Being friendly and likable is important. You want to become sociable, it will make you feel very confident and put you on your way.
Category 1 – Self Speculation
I want you to think about yourself. What do you like and what don’t you like. Write it all down, and then put things in order of most important to least important. Starting with the most important one, work on these, one at a time, until they become strengths.
You need to think about what you like about yourself and what you don’t like. What do other people like? What could be better and give you a better reaction? IMPROVE IT!! There is ALWAYS room for improvement. You just have to step forward and take the time and effort to do it. It has to be worth it to you. So make it worth it.
Category 2 – Conversation Skills
I have said this many times before, I’ll say it again. To easily engage in conversation with someone, you need to be COMFORTABLE around them. How is this achieved? Simple. Experience! The more strangers you talk to, the more used to being around them you’ll be. The more comfortable you’ll be. The easier it will be to talk about things freely. You HAVE to go up to a few random strangers and talk to them, find out things about them.
Open ended questions-
Every time you talk to someone you don’t know, you’re going to need to find out some things about them to know what they’re interested in. So ask them! Before you talk to someone, you should plan on finding out a few of the following:
Name
Where they are from
What they are interested in
What you have in common
Once you find out some of these things, you can start basing questions off of them. If they say they’re from Wisconsin, ask what it was like there. They say boring, ask how come. They say because there’s nothing to do. Ask them what they do here. See where I’m going? Once you hit certain points, you’ll be able to jump in and get into the conversation, or they’ll get really interested about a few things and will go on and on. It all takes EXPERIENCE.
Category 3 – Becoming Friendly
There are a few things that you need do to in order to appear friendly to most people:
Smile with confidence (IMPORTANT)
EYE CONTACT!
Engage in conversation easily, become interested
Joke around
Emit energy, don’t be boring and monotone and out of it. Have energy!
People will warm up to you if you make sure to be friendly. Women like friendly people; they get along with everyone and are full of confidence.
The rest will come when and if I feel like it
.
------------------
"Life cannot reach total perfection until it has seen total imperfection."
"High risk can yield only high loss or high reward."
"Ignorance is a blessing."
"If you don't know the meaning of life why are you trying to win? Isn't that the same as not knowing what you're fighting for?"
"Life and death are the same thing"
-Yours Truly
[This message has been edited by MaDsKaTeR212 (edited 11-09-2002).]
So here you are. You’re really disappointed with yourself but are already on your way to self improvement, you just don’t know where to start. So I’m going to break it down for you and try to help you out.
People say to be yourself. I say progress yourself.
#1 – APPEARANCE
There is only one excuse I would accept if someone claimed they weren’t wearing clothing they thought represented how they wanted other people to see them, if they were unable to get that clothing (due to money problems, etc). There is almost always a way to dress that people will like and see your personality stand out. If someone accused me of stereotyping someone because of how they looked, and if my opinion was based on clothing, they would have no justifiable position. The way people present themselves is chosen by them.
Category A – Clothing
I’m going to talk about your clothing. Clothing is an extremely important part of how you look. Try going through a couple magazines with models and see what they’re wearing. Look at some of the popular people you know. Try some of it. If you like how something looks on someone, see if it looks good on you. You have to experiment.
Things of importance:
-Color
If you wear all black, you might get second looks from people (bad ones). If you wear completely opposite colors, chances are it will look fine to most people now-a-days. If you wear pink stripes and purple polka dots, chances are it’s not going to go over too well. Pick colors that stand out, but aren’t ugly looking. Ask people for their opinions.
-Size
This is really important. DO NOT worry about something being too small, and getting something 2 sizes bigger than you need. Tight clothes look OK while exceedingly loose clothes make you look scrawny and poor. Try it on, if it’s hard to move in its too tight, and if a shirt goes down to your knees or pants can’t stay up without a belt then it’s too loose.
-Style
Style is definitely a biggie. It represents your uniqueness, how you’re different from everyone else. There are a lot of different ways to dress commonly known by people. Prep (becoming popular), Punk, Goth (generally disliked), whatever you would consider Fubu (what a lot of black people wear), 70s, 80s, you name it. Try to pick something that matches your personality/lifestyle.
-Shoes
Shoes make more a difference than a lot of people think. Good, clean shoes are great. Don’t go for the cheap $20 Nikes, try something a little better quality and sharp looking. Shoes, as with everything, should represent how highly you think of yourself. These should match your style too.
Category B – Accessories
Things such as rings, necklaces, piercings (to a limit), chains, belts, etc can make a difference. They are the bells and whistles. They can be expensive, but don’t have to be.
-Rings and piercings
One or two rings can be a bonus, pick them wisely. Mostly anything made for men will probably be ok to wear if it didn’t cost 50 cents. Piercings… depending on your style, eyebrow, nose, and tongue etc piercings can be ok. If you pierce your ears it will probably look fine, but make sure you get something that looks good.
-Watch
A watch isn’t a bad idea. Just get a decent one, you’ll know when you see it if it will look good. There is a lot to choose from.
-Necklace
I couldn’t really tell you much for this one, except to see what other people out there are wearing and what looks good with your style.
Category C – Hygiene and Body
It is very important that you are clean, and in good shape. You want to make sure you don’t smell awful, or have hair down to your knees (unless you’re into that...).
-Hair
Make sure your hair is neat and you have a definite thing going. If you want it long, make sure you know exactly how it’s going to be, don’t just let it grow out and leave it, it looks sloppy and lazy. Cut it pretty short if you want minimal work and still have it look good. Gel is in today, girls like seeing that you have effort to take care of yourself so it helps. If you have the right build, shaving your head might do wonders for you. If you’re kind of tall and have certain features, long curly hair might work really well. It all depends on the person, and what you want. Ask people, play around a bit, go to a stylist.
-Skin
If you have acne, I recommend www.acne.org. It has helped me TREMENDOUSLY, and many people are really surprised by how well the regimen over there works. You have to be committed to it, and it will probably help. Go there for more info. Other options are definitely a dermatologist. You have to try things to find an answer. Skin texture is also important, and how tan it is. If you’re really white then get a tan. If your skin is really dry, get lotion. For your face, make sure you shave unless you are going for a certain look. If you want a goatee, then go for it! Just don't let it get shabby.
-Nails
Cut them. That’s about it.
-Teeth
If they aren’t straight, braces. That’s all you need. It’s expensive but the effects are really great. If they aren’t white, BRUSH THEM REGULARLY. Two minutes a day. Time it. If you need to make them white, try those white strip things; otherwise ask your dentist what he can do. Teeth are what a smile is all about, and a smile is all about showing how friendly you are.
-Build
We have a whole health and fitness forum for this. Workout, and look there for advice on how. If you gain muscle, you’ll look better, plain and simple. Just don't look scrawny, and you'll be fine. Unless you're a dedicated bodybuilder (in which case you'll know this already), you cant have too much muscle.
-Smell
Shower at least once a day, twice if you get all sweaty etc. Change your sheets on your bed regularly. Brush your teeth. Wash your clothes. This should get rid of bad smells, to add good smells use cologne.
-Voice
If you have an annoying voice (ask people trust me, you don’t know how your voice really sounds, or you can also record yourself) then start singing along with different types of music try to train your voice. Do a search (www.google.com). This mostly only applies if you have a voice that stands out negatively. If you have a bad laugh, try to control it a little.
-Posture
This is very important. Get someone to record you (or do it yourself) walking around or doing something. See if you walk weird, sit weird, bend over weird etc. Try holding your shoulders low and back. Let your arms swing NATURALLY. Don’t make your steps too big or small. Keep your chin up. And don’t overdo any of it, it’s very obvious.
#2 – PERSONALITY
Being friendly and likable is important. You want to become sociable, it will make you feel very confident and put you on your way.
Category 1 – Self Speculation
I want you to think about yourself. What do you like and what don’t you like. Write it all down, and then put things in order of most important to least important. Starting with the most important one, work on these, one at a time, until they become strengths.
You need to think about what you like about yourself and what you don’t like. What do other people like? What could be better and give you a better reaction? IMPROVE IT!! There is ALWAYS room for improvement. You just have to step forward and take the time and effort to do it. It has to be worth it to you. So make it worth it.
Category 2 – Conversation Skills
I have said this many times before, I’ll say it again. To easily engage in conversation with someone, you need to be COMFORTABLE around them. How is this achieved? Simple. Experience! The more strangers you talk to, the more used to being around them you’ll be. The more comfortable you’ll be. The easier it will be to talk about things freely. You HAVE to go up to a few random strangers and talk to them, find out things about them.
Open ended questions-
Every time you talk to someone you don’t know, you’re going to need to find out some things about them to know what they’re interested in. So ask them! Before you talk to someone, you should plan on finding out a few of the following:
Name
Where they are from
What they are interested in
What you have in common
Once you find out some of these things, you can start basing questions off of them. If they say they’re from Wisconsin, ask what it was like there. They say boring, ask how come. They say because there’s nothing to do. Ask them what they do here. See where I’m going? Once you hit certain points, you’ll be able to jump in and get into the conversation, or they’ll get really interested about a few things and will go on and on. It all takes EXPERIENCE.
Category 3 – Becoming Friendly
There are a few things that you need do to in order to appear friendly to most people:
Smile with confidence (IMPORTANT)
EYE CONTACT!
Engage in conversation easily, become interested
Joke around
Emit energy, don’t be boring and monotone and out of it. Have energy!
People will warm up to you if you make sure to be friendly. Women like friendly people; they get along with everyone and are full of confidence.
The rest will come when and if I feel like it
------------------
"Life cannot reach total perfection until it has seen total imperfection."
"High risk can yield only high loss or high reward."
"Ignorance is a blessing."
"If you don't know the meaning of life why are you trying to win? Isn't that the same as not knowing what you're fighting for?"
"Life and death are the same thing"
-Yours Truly
[This message has been edited by MaDsKaTeR212 (edited 11-09-2002).]
