I’m a 27 year old guy and as I’ve gotten older I’ve noticed my desire to date has gradually waned. When I was in college I was always really excited about the prospect of trying to hook up with girls, especially since I was a late bloomer when it came to that sort of thing. Now, however, that excitement and enthusiasm is gone. My last relationship ended in the fall of 2019 and since then I have not had sex, but somehow it doesn’t bother me. Over the past two years Ive matched with several different girls on apps who have flat out said they wanted to have sex with me, and even though they were all pretty attractive and I was turned on at the prospect of sleeping with them I never had sex with any of them. Even though they were all keen and clearly wanted some I never met up with any of them, I just let the text conversations die out.
Some have suggested that I could be asexual but I don’t think so. I am without a doubt attracted to women sexually, I still think back upon the various times I’ve been with women and I still see women in public and think they’re attractive, but my desire to pursue women in earnest is gone. These days I’m content with jerking off rather than trying to hook up with a real woman. I’m not really alarmed by this development, just confused as to what has caused it.
I have a few ideas as to why this has happened. Maybe I just grew tired of hooking up with mediocre women from apps, or perhaps it has something to do with my fear of accidental pregnancy, or maybe I’ve just matured emotionally and no longer desire meeting women as much as I did in the past. In addition I’ve never met a woman I’ve felt a true romantic connection with. There has not been a time in my life when I’ve felt a significant “spark” with any woman ive hooked up with, I’ve always felt each time that I’m settling in some way.
In short I dont know how to feel about this or what should be done. Right now I feel oddly content with my lack of female company, but what if in the future I want it and the only women left to date are single mothers or crazy women with baby rabies? Plus when I grow old and unattractive and my hair falls out how would I be able to find anyone good? I may be content now with sitting on the sideline but my worry about regretting this later. I still have vague ideas of finding a life partner but I dont consider it something that will realistically happen. Either way I’m sure some of you on here have dealt with the same thing. How did you navigate these feelings, and what did you do? I’d like to hear your insights on this. What should I do to understand and deal with this?
