Nice christian girl responding to DJ approach... or not

[K2602]

Hey all,

Friend of a friend that I'm working on. I do like her but no one-itis in sight. Nice 23 y.o. girl with not a hell of a lot experience from what I gather.

Kind of got paired up with her at a dinner party, kept good eye contact thoughout the night, bit of kino to accentuate things I was saying, lots of C&F and laughs from both sides, a couple of neg hits for good measure. We were the last two to leave so as I noticed the I/L go up we talked a little deeper but I still kept the C&F going. End of the night, have phone number and got little kiss at the end of the night. Went well I thought.

THEN, she talks to mutual friend 3 days later and says she liked me a lot and connected with me, but she was offended by some of the C&F (which she was in fact laughing at on the night). WTF?

For the record, I was very measured in any little neg jokes made, and I saw nothing I had to take back, but she's obviously not used to this kind of approach at Sunday School

Before reverting to the stock "Next" response, anyone got some good tips? Interest level is obviously still there but the "offended" thing had me puzzled. Maybe she's trying to balance her IL with some negatiove thinking?

For the record, I'm a Christian too so there's none of the "them vs us" mentaility.

Cheers!

 

[MetalFortress]

Wait, what part of what you said offended her?

 

[rgeere]

Well, I am also a Christian and go to a Christian University. From experience I can vouch for the fact that unless they are hypocritical and a little slutty, then neghits do not work well with Christian girls. You don't want those kind of girls anyways, so I wouldn't bother with neghitting.

 

[rgeere]

I posted this somewhere else, but this is a prime example of a neghit I tried on a Christian girl and it didn't work

I suppose since everyone else is doing it, I will do it as well.Normally I keep my lady issues out of these forums, but I want to give some of you a chance to show me you can give valid advice about women. My situation:

There is this girl I like; she is very sweet and caring, and totally harmless. I can't really ever imagine her playing games because she is so sweet and submissive acting.

Anyways, me and a few friends were sitting at the table with her, and one guy commented on how sweet and harmless she acts all the time, and said that she must have some sort of dark side.We'll they keeped talking about how she must have some sort of evil side, and I couldn't help but giggle to myself. Everyone has a dark side you know; it's just a matter of how often the evil side shows.

Well, I listened a while, and finally said "ohhh, she is evil all right ... she is like evil incarnite in a chocolate covered shell."

The whole room cracked up, while she just sat there not really knowing what to say. I wondered if I embarrased her, until she sat next to me the next day during lunch and I got the chance to talk with her.

She sat next to me, and the conversation ensued...

Me:"Hi *name*, you know it is REALLY a good thing to be evil, right?"
Her: "I don't really think it is a good thing."
Me: "Sure it is, because when I call you evil, it is in a way beneficial to everyone."
Her: "Well, I don't know."
Me: "I mean you shouldn't take it personal."
Her: "I understand that."
Me: "But, if you trust me, you would know it's a good thing."
Me: *smiling*"I'm still not sure if it's a good thing."

Well, the conversation sort of fizzled out. Either she doesn't like me, or isn't getting the
hint. I should try the direct approach and see how she responds, I guess

 

[Sart]

OKAY

I always know that I sound like a smatass when the whole good christian girl pops up. I have no problem with christians, hell, I kind of am one, just not the American puritan version of one...you know? The wildest and wettest action I have had is with quiet, shy, christian little girls who dont swear, dont eat too much in public, love their mummies and daddys etc etc etc. One of them, as I have said, was a goddam hooker. When I asked her if she regretted it she said "Yes, but only the chance that it coud come back on her, because she is meant to be prim and proper".

Now, she is an exception to the rule and also, her circustances were an exception, she actually IS a great little chick who made a blunder. BUT, if there is such a thing as this "good christian girl".....RUN! The way you guys describe them, sheeeit, they remind me of that chick in Animal House, giving that guy a hand job, whilst discussing politics and she had that surgical glove on.

Sex and women should be bloody fun and yes, act with respect in public, but with you, man she should connect! It should be "no holes barred" passionate, wild and wicked FULL STOP.

I do believ that these good christian girls exist, but who the fukc would want them? You can be a good person, follow Christ AND be normal and suffer a human condition called passion. I love the USA, I lived there for a year and the people were brilliant. Its this puitanical, calvinist undercurrent that fukcs it all up and makes you vote in Bush, and have this strong Christian Right. You do realize that Christ was a left wing academic radical dont you? He hing out with a prostitute right? He didn't wear a shirt and tie and have sunday cookies and tea. You do realize that it was the Christian Right of his era (Hebrew hierachy, Church) that had him killed? You do realize that your Christian Right would have him imprisoned in bloddy Cuba if he was here now. You do realize that your little christian girl would be goose stepping past you in 1932 Berlin?

Man, give me a real woman, with blood in those veins and fire in that heart and passion down below, and if she folows Christs teachings....as in..actually gets it! all the better. Dont give me some pastel proncess who has such a tight asss that I couldn't even shove a credit card up there.

Go for it mate, act how you want to act, be who you are comfortable being, dont change for any bytch ever.

This gota little political and probably offended someone somewhere but, hey, cencorship and sheep like mentality is never the answer.

 

[squirrels]

You kids and your neghits.

 

[Julian]

screw these christian girls its all about the satanic b1tches!

 

[abcd_z]

There's really not much we can do for the original poster, since he didn't give us any info. It could be that you actually offended her, or that she is just saying that for whatever reason of her own. Next time, give us more info.

HOWEVER, I can help out the guy who posted the part where his convo fell apart. There are a bunch of ways you could have handled it, but here's what I would have done.

When you called her "evil" the first time, you should have immediately then tried a push/pull. The comment you made was the "push" part, then for the "pull", something like "Nah, I'm just kidding about that. This girl is (pointing to the girl in question) an angel." (hug her as a form of apologizing and/or kino).

On another note, what the two of you did wasn't really a neg-hit. Those are only necessary for an HB 9 or 10 who has her the bïtch shield at full force. Fortunately, what you did sounds a lot more like an attempt at C+F or push/pull.

EDIT: Crud, I posted like I was at mASF. Okay, lemme switch gears for a second.

"You should have NEXTed her!"

 

[akindofblue]

Sart,

I can live with your criticism, but if you're curious about a view from the other end, if you ask me, you, my friend, I'd say the life you recommend is a very myopic one.

You ask who would want a good Christian girl. Well, for starters, me. There is a whole other level of intimacy and one that you really can't explore after having sex. It's a gradual progression, a build-up. An intimacy of spending time getting to know one another. That dies a bit after having sex, just talking with practically everyone I know who has.

But you know, when that time comes, I know full-well that my girl is going to go at it like there is no tomorrow, but that's understood to be something for marriage. Right now, I'm having a blast getting to know her, getting to know where to kiss her to make her giggle. We're learning to surf together. Started painting together. Learning a foreign language together. Working out together. There is so much more to life and relationships than sex. Don't get me wrong; I'll enjoy it when that time comes.

You can belittle my "puritanical" roots all you want, but I have a good time, all the same, and I'm convinced that this is the best way to do things. I feel as if we're building towards something, and I don't think I'd give that up for the world.

And no, quite frankly, I don't think Christ would have been a leftist academic. I don't think you can box him that easily. Just for starters, Christ would not have supported a nanny state. Giving was only giving when it was done through the heart. Stealing money from taxpayers and redistributing it would have been the equivalent of the legalistic rabbis who condemned him. I'll just make note that without exception, the most generous and charitable states in this nation were also among the most religiously observant (and often the poorest). And quite frankly, while Christ forgave, he also said to end all sin and leave it behind you...hardly the rhetoric we see coming from the left these days. You could certainly argue leftist tendencies were there, but again, Christ was greater than left or right, and the generally amoral (and especially the both hedonistic and short-sighted) stances taken by the left would not have been something he took part in.

As for imprisoning him in Cuba, hardly. I somehow don't think Christ would have picked up a gun or strapped a bunch of bombs to his body in the face of war.

I think we can both agree that a woman made of fire is something to be desired. I can tell how great a lover a woman will be by the way she kisses and holds me. By the way she gives herself to me. But I also like a woman whose faith is also a fire that brightens the rest of her life.

Just my humble opinion.

 

[Sart]

AND THEN THE DREAMING ENDED

Man, I was gonna let it pass me by, let it through to the keeper, where to begin? Its just too damn political and too huge a topic really. It is both religion and politics, two things that are almost endless.

I guess that you being 24 and knowing all you know has me spun out a little. Most people I know simply live in denial, they have a facade of happiness, you know them, people like, probably your parents.

I guess that having been married for over 11 years and being there when she was ill, really ill and looking long and hard at myself, I think I may have a better idea of an LTR than you perhaps? But thats just from my perspective isnt it.

I'll see ya in 12 years time, we'll see how ya doin then. What, 55% of marriages end in divorce, inclduing your parents generation, something like 75% end in divorce with people under 30, so.....lets just let time tell.

 

[Giuseppe Notte]

These girls have very little experience. Trying to get them too "aggressively" is not a good idea. C&F might come off like that in some cases.

I hope you know that laying a girl like that requires a lot of time. She won't give in after a few days and she will get emotionally attached to the one taking her virginity. Is that what you want?

If so, keep up and move slowly, less aggressively.
If not, then go out and get some other girls who are more receptive to your style.

No one says you can't do both in the same time though...

 

[MetalFortress]

Sart, you cheat on your wife, and not only make excuses for it but brag about it, and have given us no reason to believe that it's anything BUT cheating (I.E. it's an open marriage etc). Therefore, your opinion is invalidated.

NEXT

 

[K2602]

Hi guys,

Thanks for the responses. Seems from doing a bit of talking with some of this girl's friends that she's interested in me and was doing her best to talk herself out of it, or find some reason not to fall hard.

Ever notice how a lack of obstacles can really scare some women? They'll just create one so you can chase, or apologize, or something.

Anyway, this lady still has high interest level but being unpredictable and a little childish (talking to friends like it's high school or something), my own IL has plummeted so this one can chase me whilst I pursue the field. Too much effort is never a good thing for one that isn't worth the effort.

It has been a learning experience, and that's never a bad thing.

 

[xiola]

I wouldnt mess with her if I were you. If you were on your best behaviour, and still offended her, what do you think is gonna happen when you are being your true self?

b

 

[K2602]

Originally posted by xiola
I wouldnt mess with her if I were you. If you were on your best behaviour, and still offended her, what do you think is gonna happen when you are being your true self?

b

Well, I wouldn't say I wasn't being myself, but screw walking on egg shells! That's a ****fight waiting to happen!

 

[Sart]

Metalfortress

Mate, I am separated from my wife, I DID cheat a few times after 8 years when she was no longer able to have sex.

I dont think my opinion is invalid, but I see where you are coming from. We separated after her health got back on track and we realized that we had gone from lovers to brother/sister. Its hard to explain but I still love the woman and would lay down in traffic for her.

I guess I can see where you are coming from, nobody ever stands at the alter thinking they will cheat or break up....well, I certainly didn't anyway.

Its 11 years of my life gone, but I have two beautiful little girls as a result and will always provide for my children and the Mother of my children. Not looking for validation by the way, just thought you should understand the scope a little better.

Seeya Metalfortress, I have no beef with you.