Article 2 - Be a Man (by Pook)
What can I say about this post that hasn't been said before? Simply put... it's a work of art! This is the post that probably turned my whole foundation around when it came to becoming the DJ I always wanted to be. A definite must read as you begin your Boot Camp training!
Source:
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=16903
There is a prize to the person who correctly answers this question, “What is a Man?”. When asked what they want in a guy, women say simply, "a man!" But, alas! Real men are becoming more and more sparse these days. Women are tired of the sensitive wimps who have no backbones. One woman even wrote a song about the subject, "Where have all the cowboys gone?"
So what is a Man? How should he act? Decades and centuries ago, the question was nonsense. But today in our feminised culture (this may be more in America then in other countries), most of us have been raised to believe that there is something inherently wrong with being a man and acting the way how a man should act. No wonder males don't know how to act around women! No wonder websites like these exist!
Indeed, I embarked on this mystery to find out the answer to this question. Several women were bunched up in a group, gossiping and yapping about cute boys, fashion, relationships ie nothing. This behaviour extends to all women of all cultures (and also different animal species. Cows group together and moo and gnaw on grass and take notice of bulls brave enough to approach the group).
I approach. "How are you, ladies!! I am the Pook."
A woman squeals. "Oh! It's a Pook!" The others squeal in unison.
Once the ladies calm themselves after being in the presence of a Pook, I ask them, "Ladies! Do tell me, what do you define as a Man?"
With devilish tongues, the women answer:
"A Man is someone sensitive to me."
"A Man is the guy who will take care of my needs."
"A Man is the one that is in tune with my feelings."
"A Man is one who doesn't have an ego."
"A Man is the guy who will sit and watch chick flicks all day with me."
"A Man is the guy who will go shopping with me."
"A Man is the guy who will share all his feelings with me."
Such are the common answers! The males listen and actualise what the women say. They are constantly declared 'sweet' and 'wonderful' and 'nice', oh 'so nice'. Mothers and older women are proud of them and tell them, "If I were younger, I would go for you!"
Poor Nice Guy! The women his own age avoid him like the plague and jump for the jerks. The Nice Guy becomes an emotional tampon to be used and discarded. The Nice Guy, being so nice and sweet, listens to the woman vomit her feelings about men and bleed her problems of her boyfriend on him. He listens with baited hope when he hears, "Oh, why can't guys be like you! You listen and understand." Then she turns around and gets abused by another jerk! The vicious cycle repeats again and again.
Why are women acting in this way?
They are simply acting as women do, as in their nature. The problem is not with them, it is with guys. We are afraid to embrace our nature, that of being a Man. Being in a culture that sees Manhood as predatory and oppressive and uncouth, we cover it up within ourselves. By doing so, we hide our sexuality. (Sexuality! Do I mean rock hard abs and rippling muscles? That is not what women find sexy [it's a contributing factor, not the core]. A type of personality is what women are looking for. Someone they can depend on [has backbone], someone who will be successful [has ambition], and someone who is decisive [has charge]. Nice guys have no backbone because they think women are frail things that will break in confrontation; nice guys reveal no ambition because they fear being seen as arrogant to women; nice guys are afraid to be decisive for fear of being seen as 'oppressive'.)
Two poles of thought men drift into: the Nice Guy and the Jerk. Both blame the other.
"You ruin the women with your lack of commitment and unappreciative nature," says the Nice Guy.
"You spoil the women with your endless listening ear and stupid caring attitude," replies the Jerk.
The two endlessly war. Those on the sidelines have their own conclusions. One side says, "The Jerk is the way to go. Ceaseless sex! Evolution demands it." The other side says, "The Nice Guy is the way to go. Glorious relationship! Society demands it."
But the two still argue.
"You cause the women to think they are in control," says the Jerk.
"Ahh, but you cause the women to think all men are scum," replies the Nice Guy.
Is there not an end to the Nice Guy vs. Jerk debate? Are these the only choices?
The Cycle
The Nice Guy emerges. He is tenderised and wants to shout in every woman's ear "I will not abuse you. I am sweet and good. Based on that alone you should date me." When the Nice Guy talks to the girl on a date, *poof*, the date turns into Oprah. "Oh, my life has been SO downhill from here," the Nice Guy whines. "My little girly car was slashed, I failed my classes, but because of you this day has been so much better." Then the Nice Guy goes, "Let me tell you my life story. My birth was long, hard, and painful for my mother..." Our culture has become so feminised that the Nice Guy thinks it is proper to vomit his feelings and emotions all over the place. (It's gross!) Women, rightfully, run for the hills when they hear your declarations of love.
The Metamorphosis comes. The Nice Guy eventually realises what all the ladies want, becomes bitter, and changes himself into a Jerk. His goal now is to sleep with as many women as possible and figure out all the tricks and tactics to do so. He focuses on calculation rather then natural joy. When a woman comes, he pulls out a chart of all the 'moves' and 'tactics' with arrows and patterns. He unleashes his laptop, accesses a Lay Guide, and reviews his strategy. Time passes and once was fun becomes meaningless.
Back to being nice. He sees it now as turning on Nice Guy or turning on Jerk. "Why can't I just be myself!?" he soon thunders at Reality.
Just be a Man! There is no need to reprogram yourself. You will have the interests you have, the hobbies you have, the body you have, but you can easily become a MAN. It is all simply in how you think and as you think you shall become. But what is Man? Shall we have the answer? Here it is:
A Man is a guy who is not scared of his testosterone!
A Man follows the passion in his life. Passion of women? Of course not. A Man has goals and desires that go above that of chasing chicks. After childhood, there are true winners and losers in life. A Man desires to be the winner. A Man wants to win in what he does. Because of his passion, a Man can sometimes come off as arrogant and egotistical. He does not apologise for this or for his desires.
"It is your actions that cause the disgrace of Men," says the Nice Guy.
"It is yours," replies the Jerk.
No, gentlemen, the disgrace of men is in not embracing your true nature: following your passion and, thus, loving life. Women are to enhance your life, not to be your life. So to the Nice Guy, stop placing your happiness on getting a girlfriend. To the Jerk, quit wasting your life on seduction. Don't spend your time chasing girls; invest it by putting it into your interests and desires, thus the whole of your life.
When you do this, all of a sudden you have what every woman wants: Ambition, charge, decisiveness, backbone, kindness, stableness, and confidence.
I want you to read what a women posted as what SHE thought was a great guy. (Focus on what I put in bold)
"Qualifications of a great guy"
1) Physical
A bit athletic so he's in shape and a good complexion (If he can help it). Very focused, intelligent eyes that pay attention to whoever deserves it. Hair that can be tossed, and a relaxed, but tidy wardrobe.
2) Emotional
His attitude has got to be mostly deterministic and level-headed. If crappy stuff happens to him...he should roll with the punches and learn from it. If he ends up doing crappy stuff then he should get up, brush off and be a better guy the next time round.
* He must also have deep convictions: he should NEVER give up his ideals or morals for anything.
* I know it sounds cheesy, but he must be respectful to his mother (it reflects character)...even if she is witchy like some moms these days.
* And of course: sense of humour, artistic, and an awesome boyfriend.
3) Social
A great guy is the one who offers the girls a chair, opens doors etc. (But isn't a total flirt--he just considers it his duty.)
* A guy should clean up his language around girls.
* He should stand up for people who are being bashed in conversations. That's important to us girls b/c backstabbing is common among us--and we really notice when somebody isn't a gossip.
* And my personal thing is that he should be the guy who "could" be the centre of attention...but he prefers to hang out with the few guys in the back who are his genuine friends.
Phew...I hope this helped a bit. Physique: as long as it's within the usual bounds is pretty much unimportant.
If you want to get a really great girl...start working on your character and self-control - (not because it's you, but because those two things are really uncommon these days) - because a great girl is one who's been working on that already and she'll recognize it in you.
