Originally posted by cyclonus:
Forum looks like its heading in the right direction.
-cyc.
I hope so. Hear are my thoughts.
Personally, observing a woman’s emotional reaction to your words or body language is not a new concept. It’s difficult for an AFC to do (the woman is on a pedestal after all, ya can hardly see her all the way… up there.) but I don’t think there is any man out there who has not figured out by age10 that women are emotional and men are logical.
DP seems to be advocating that we use our inherent powers of logic and observation to CONTROL a woman’s emotions. The second you DESIRE control, you lose it. Or maybe she is way ahead of you, recognizes your DESIRE for control in the first 60sec and lets you run with it. She could lead you around like a carrot in front of a donkey by reacting one way or the other to what ever you say. In the end, SHE chooses how to react to you based on WHO SHE IS.
To wit:
You are what you think.
You find what you seek.
If you THINK that controlling a woman’s emotions is the ultimate DJ technique, then YOU will BECOME the master of it. However, you will only FIND a type of woman who RESPONDS to that way of thinking.
Kind of close minded if you ask me. I want to find a woman who RESPONDS to me for who I am, not the mask I wear or the strategy I employ.
Blah… blah… AFC talking… keep reading.
I used to think you should not play games and upon finding this site recognized that I might be an AFC.
Through this site I realized that games ARE played by both sexes even it they don’t know it. That I did have traits of an AFC (pedestal, no eye contact, etc.)
Now I believe game playing is a waste of time. Secondly, while I have weaned of some of my AFC tendencies, I can honestly say I never felt like an AFC once in my relationships with women.
Why you ask?
My goal has always been to find a woman I WANT to date. Not just the ones I can MANIPULATE into dating. I want a woman with the smarts not to fall for this stuff because I never have. In high school, I put one woman on the highest pedestal possible. I was her "friend", etc, but I NEVER actually asked her out. I never made it clear I saw her in a non-friend way (Grade A AFC). Since coming to this site I have wondered why I did not have the balls to go for it with this girl in high school. I have come to realize that even though I was head over heels in love with THE IDEA of her, I did not like THE REALITY of who she was. That is why I never asked her out. My gut was telling me it would simply not work because this woman WAS NOT A WOMAN I WANTED TO DATE. We went out after high school a couple times, but still that gut check was there. Today, thinking back on those days and from info gleaned from this site, there were good signs she may have been open to romance if I could have seen past the pedestal I put her on. I didn’t because I did not want too.
Therefore, while many here may feel they are AFC’s, they may not be. Don’t get me wrong. If you can’t smile or make eye contact with a woman you are going to go nowhere with the ladies. Just don’t feel that because you were not happy as an AFC, you will be as a Don Juan. In fact, you may ultimately be even more depressed because you have dated and bedded hundreds of women but still not found one you TRULY WANT.
To wit, this is my philosophy to finding that elusive diamond in the rough:
Let go.
Dig in.
Find someone who wants to be with you.
Not terribly enlightening to some of you I suppose. Maybe even too simplistic. You may even have laughed out loud when you read it.
But think about it.
Let go of your desire if you want to light her fire.
Dig in and don’t give up, but pass on her ass if she ain’t got latitude in her attitude.
Be you, for her to find you.
Who are you?
Maximus
Lao Tzu – Tao Te Ching
When the best student hears about the way
He practices it assiduously;
When the average student hears about the way
It seems to him one moment there and gone the next;
When the worst student hears about the way
He laughs out loud.
If he did not laugh
It would be unworthy of being the way.
[This message has been edited by Maximus (edited 02-08-2002).]