After carefully analyzing my personal shortcomings, I believe it is time to change my views on female friends.
Here's what lead up to the need for a change.
About 4 months ago I went to a local restaurant for lunch. I am looking over the menu when I hear the waitress approach the table. Turns out, she was a girl that I had known about 4 years ago. She had moved away 3 years prior and I hadn't heard from her since. We exchanged #'s and I have been in contact with her regularly since.
She is from my "hopeless" days. We would go out after work, I was making good cash so I would buy her drinks all the time. I always had interest in her, which she was well aware of. Anyways, I played the nice fool for months before she moved away. I sort of remember us parting on less than great terms for some reason.
I have been out with her many times since we have gotten reacquainted. We get along very well together. She has matured greatly (she is now 23, 19 back then). I started seeing someone else a few weeks after we started hanging out. I noticed a little jealousy, inquisitions, hints that I should break up with my g/f, etc. from her. I thought nothing of it, but I have had three different people who have observed us together telling me "hey that chick wants you!" Honestly I don't see it, but obviously others are picking up on something.
After she became aware that I was seeing someone, she started telling me things she never would have shared before. She started going on about how she wishes she could find a good sex partner with no strings attached, telling me stuff about the guys she has been with, etc. Really intimate details of her life.
A few weeks ago after a night out she asked if I wanted to crash at her place. I did, but didn't put on any moves.
Which brings us to the present. She recently informed me that she will be moving back up to Tenn. in a couple of weeks. We made plans and went out last night, me, her, and a group of my friends. We went out, had a good time, but it seemed something was bothering her. We got back to her place and she once again offered to let me stay with her. I had no ride, so she had to drive me home today (about 1/2 hour away). We slept together but didn't do anything.
Ok, here's the problem. For some reason feelings are creeping into the picture. Maybe it's just the fact she's leaving and I will miss her company, I don't know. I can't speak for her, but it seems there's something on her mind as well (this would go against my once a friend always a friend philosophy). She is leaving in less than two weeks.
From now on, no more girls I'm attracted to for friends. I can't do it. I will always want more (sex, relationship). I have a couple of girls I go out with like this, and I find myself torn between accepting a certain amount of female B.S., like "options" for going out(since they are just friends) and putting my foot down (cause it pisses me off). It's just impossible to detatch your manly desires from a female you find attractive.
Now a question. What would you guys do in my shoes? Try to go for the goods, or lay off cause it will only cause problems?
Here's what lead up to the need for a change.
About 4 months ago I went to a local restaurant for lunch. I am looking over the menu when I hear the waitress approach the table. Turns out, she was a girl that I had known about 4 years ago. She had moved away 3 years prior and I hadn't heard from her since. We exchanged #'s and I have been in contact with her regularly since.
She is from my "hopeless" days. We would go out after work, I was making good cash so I would buy her drinks all the time. I always had interest in her, which she was well aware of. Anyways, I played the nice fool for months before she moved away. I sort of remember us parting on less than great terms for some reason.
I have been out with her many times since we have gotten reacquainted. We get along very well together. She has matured greatly (she is now 23, 19 back then). I started seeing someone else a few weeks after we started hanging out. I noticed a little jealousy, inquisitions, hints that I should break up with my g/f, etc. from her. I thought nothing of it, but I have had three different people who have observed us together telling me "hey that chick wants you!" Honestly I don't see it, but obviously others are picking up on something.
After she became aware that I was seeing someone, she started telling me things she never would have shared before. She started going on about how she wishes she could find a good sex partner with no strings attached, telling me stuff about the guys she has been with, etc. Really intimate details of her life.
A few weeks ago after a night out she asked if I wanted to crash at her place. I did, but didn't put on any moves.
Which brings us to the present. She recently informed me that she will be moving back up to Tenn. in a couple of weeks. We made plans and went out last night, me, her, and a group of my friends. We went out, had a good time, but it seemed something was bothering her. We got back to her place and she once again offered to let me stay with her. I had no ride, so she had to drive me home today (about 1/2 hour away). We slept together but didn't do anything.
Ok, here's the problem. For some reason feelings are creeping into the picture. Maybe it's just the fact she's leaving and I will miss her company, I don't know. I can't speak for her, but it seems there's something on her mind as well (this would go against my once a friend always a friend philosophy). She is leaving in less than two weeks.
From now on, no more girls I'm attracted to for friends. I can't do it. I will always want more (sex, relationship). I have a couple of girls I go out with like this, and I find myself torn between accepting a certain amount of female B.S., like "options" for going out(since they are just friends) and putting my foot down (cause it pisses me off). It's just impossible to detatch your manly desires from a female you find attractive.
Now a question. What would you guys do in my shoes? Try to go for the goods, or lay off cause it will only cause problems?
