new here! and if possible i could really use some advice

[buzzit]

hey there!
let me introduce myself.

i am buzzit
and i'm 18 years old.
im just the average boy who doesnt have any good luck with the girls

but last time.. it was 2 months ago if im right.. i met a whole new group of persons. This group is awesome i really wanted to find a group like this but this is not the problem there's a girl i really like in the group and i liked her from the start because she's the wow type for me.

so after a month ago i told her.. that i really liked her..
but she's a bit of a problem she had some really hard times in her past with guys
so she wants to go easy with it and slow.. or else she gets afraid of them.
so thats what i did
and wel.. it really look good and well! i really though i finally had some luck with love..

but.. the last friday.. it was diffrent.. it already was diffrent for a couple of days..
so i talked to her...
and she told me.. that i said some things when i was drunk a while ago.. and i did said these things: yeh.. you know.. if she suddenly dont like anymore and she leaves me thats not my problem i mean she lost me and i not her.. and if i find a girl who is willing to take the initiative i will go for her

no about that.. she was girl who never took the initiative becuase she was to shy but.. i think she didnt liked me enough because if you really like someone that is something naturally right?

now back to the story
she was really confused about it and i understand that
it was wrong form me to say..
but when i drink to much i really become an ******* i say things i never intented to say.. nor that im the type of guy who suddenly leaves a girl for another when i really like someone i stay with that person.. i dont give a **** if a paris hilton or carmen electra suddenly likes me i will stay with the one i like

so we talked alot about it and i accually had to cry because i got ripped appart from it.. now i only know her 2 months but she suddenly said to me that we accually dont fit together that well.. but how can she know that
i only saw her like 8 times and when im not alone with her i barely talk to her because i dont have any chances then because she really likes to talk with her friends and thats offcourse fine by me

so in the end she said the most deadly sentice a woman can say: maybe its better if we be just friends..
but after that she said.. i dont know whats going to happen but there's always a chance it restores as it was

but i dont have a clue what to do.. really.. im totally clueless.. and i really hope you don's can help me out a bit! or set my up on the right tracks!

cheers!
Buzzit

 

[eaglez1177]

Ooh man. That was tough to read. And I don't mean that in the sense that I feel bad for you, I mean that in the sense that you've got A LOT of change to be made.

hey there!
let me introduce myself.

i am buzzit
and i'm 18 years old.
im just the average boy who doesnt have any good luck with the girlsFirst off, getting with girls does not require any luck, so get that notion out of your head. YOU decide your own fate when it comes to girls.

but last time.. it was 2 months ago if im right.. i met a whole new group of persons. This group is awesome i really wanted to find a group like this but this is not the problem there's a girl i really like in the group and i liked her from the start because she's the wow type for me.

so after a month ago i told her.. that i really liked her..Heres a big mistake. NEVER tell a girl you like her. Ive already explained why so im not going to repeat it, but instead i'll provide the link to the explanation: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showpost.php?p=1682704&postcount=7
but she's a bit of a problem she had some really hard times in her past with guys
so she wants to go easy with it and slow.. or else she gets afraid of them.This would've been my first indicator to next this chick. You and me are both in highschool man. Trust me, the LAST thing you want is going "easy and slow" with a girl. That will ALWAYS wind up to be a waste of time, and will never reap the expected benefit you had. You cant waste time in HS waiting around for girls, and being put on the "back burner" (like what this girl just did to you). You need to get as much ass as fast as possible and as much as possible, because HS is kind of like your "Training grounds" for the real world, and you need all the experience you can get.
so thats what i did
and wel.. it really look good and well! i really though i finally had some luck with love..Your only 18 years old. The last thing you should be talking about is love, not to mention that you have no idea what love truly is.

but.. the last friday.. it was diffrent.. it already was diffrent for a couple of days..
so i talked to her...
and she told me.. that i said some things when i was drunk a while ago.. Lol wow. If these things are so bad or whatever, why is she bringing them up NOW and not like a day after they happened? I'll tell you why. Because she needs to give herself and you an excuse to next you or "lets just be friends". This wouldve been another indicator to me that I should next this chick, because at this point, shes kind of "buttering me up" to get ditched or LJBF'd.and i did said these things: yeh.. you know.. if she suddenly dont like anymore and she leaves me thats not my problem i mean she lost me and i not her.. and if i find a girl who is willing to take the initiative i will go for herNo! You have the totally wrong idea of women. MEN are supposed to take the initiative. NOT women. Women WANT men to lead them and take the initiative. They want a man with a pair of balls who does what HE wants and is his OWN MAN. As long as you are the one letting women take the initiaive, you will always be the AFC tool who is just pvssy whipped by all the girls.

no about that.. she was girl who never took the initiative becuase she was to shy but.. i think she didnt liked me enough because if you really like someone that is something naturally right?Again, you are wrong. When a girl likes a guy, she EXPECTS the guy to take the initiative and wants him to. If he doesn't, she will take the initiative ONLY because it gives her a sense of power over you and feeds her ego, not because she likes you.

now back to the story
she was really confused about it and i understand that
it was wrong form me to say..
but when i drink to much i really become an ******* i say things i never intented to say.. nor that im the type of guy who suddenly leaves a girl for another when i really like someone i stay with that person.. i dont give a **** if a paris hilton or carmen electra suddenly likes me i will stay with the one i like

so we talked alot about it and i accually had to cry because i got ripped appart from itWow. You fvcking cried over this? Jesus christ man. Grow a pair of fvcking balls, cut your losses, stop being a b*tch, and move on... now i only know her 2 months but she suddenly said to me that we accually dont fit together that wellI saw this coming from a million miles away.. but how can she know that
i only saw her like 8 times and when im not alone with her i barely talk to her because i dont have any chances then because she really likes to talk with her friends and thats offcourse fine by meUnlike you, this girl knows what she wants and will do anything to get it. And its pretty clear she doesnt want you. That being said, she doesn't give a sh*t about your feelings at all, and has no problem LJBF'ing you.

so in the end she said the most deadly sentice a woman can say: maybe its better if we be just friends..
but after that she said.. i dont know whats going to happen but there's always a chance it restores as it wasNooo. DO NOT BELIEVE THIS. This is total and complete bullsh*t. Theres no way in hell that things will ever go back to being the same. She's just feeding you that bullsh*t because she feels kinda bad for you and wants to keep you waiting around for her so her ego and feelings get fed some more. Don't fall into this silly fvckin trap.

but i dont have a clue what to do.. really.. im totally clueless.. and i really hope you don's can help me out a bit! or set my up on the right tracks!

cheers!
Buzzit

 

[Mr.Freestyler19]

good advice!

 

[buzzit]

wow man.. im completely stunned..
after reading alot of artikels on the main side... i though i understanded it better..
but now i see what unexperienced i accually am
it did feel bad to read the things you said they were pretty hard but thats good i should stop with her.. and move on..

there's alot i need to learn

 

[eaglez1177]

wow man.. im completely stunned..
after reading alot of artikels on the main side... i though i understanded it better..
but now i see what unexperienced i accually am
it did feel bad to read the things you said they were pretty hard but thats good i should stop with her.. and move on..

there's alot i need to learn

Yes I know i was being hard on you, but trust me, if you truly want to improve, it's all for your own good

 

[buzzit]

Yes I know i was being hard on you, but trust me, if you truly want to improve, it's all for your own good

i understand.
luckly im still young so its never to late just yet

i only need to know exacly where to start.
and offcourse i have to put efford init
but i dont want to make it my top priority
you see i have another small problem but that will be solved in the summer.

but my junior and high school periods.. well.. i didnt have any contact with girls because im on a education thats not 'girl friendly'. so i never had the chance to try stuff out..
and yeh i do go out and stuff but i still got the fear of rejection..
im further more not really the shy type.. cuz i can talk really good with boys and girls alike but when its comes to the love game i really suck atm

 

[eaglez1177]

Well how can you say you have to put effort into it if you dont even wanna make it one of your top priorities? Your top priorities in life should be YOU (which includes all this stuff on SS, improvin yourself, social life, etc), YOUR FAMILY, and YOUR EDUCATION.

 

[lorekeeper]

Listen to eaglez.

nothing else to add.

 

[buzzit]

yeh thats totally true!

anyways im reading the HS bible and all the FAQ
and my god
i never knew it would be this simple
it accually all makes alot of sense now!

i cant wait to try this stuff out! it really motivated me!
and even if its still 'scary' in the beginning i got a good feeling about it!

 

[eaglez1177]

yeh thats totally true!

anyways im reading the HS bible and all the FAQ
and my god
i never knew it would be this simple
it accually all makes alot of sense now!

i cant wait to try this stuff out! it really motivated me!
and even if its still 'scary' in the beginning i got a good feeling about it!

Thats great to hear...keep us updated and let us know how things come along

 

[buzzit]

ok!
so yesterday i chilled with that group again and she was there aswell
and well i know i dont have any chance anymore but that accually didnt care to me anymore
i just putted some of these things i learned here to the test
and im stunned i suddenly talk way more easier with the girls
and thats just the start of all this!
and i see all the girls equal now.. i dont think wow! she's a godlike!
noway.. the thing i think now is she's just a girl!
that really helps with the talking

anyways
i have a question..
cauze.. i was talking to a friend yesterday when everybody left
but we talked about how he had his last relationship...
so he said well.. i was confident and i really said alot of nice things and stuff
but i know this girl aswell so i was curious today and i talked her towards the subject..
and she said.. yeh he said somany things it really made me felt good and so i really liked him..

so i got a bid confused? because i though if you say tomany good things that it loses its strengh and get boring..

so am i wrong or ?
can someone clear this up a bit?

 

[eaglez1177]

anyways
i have a question..
cauze.. i was talking to a friend yesterday when everybody left
but we talked about how he had his last relationship...
so he said well.. i was confident and i really said alot of nice things and stuff
but i know this girl aswell so i was curious today and i talked her towards the subject..
and she said.. yeh he said somany things it really made me felt good and so i really liked him..

so i got a bid confused? because i though if you say tomany good things that it loses its strengh and get boring..

so am i wrong or ?
can someone clear this up a bit?

Yes, if you are too nice to a girl and say too many good things to her, theyre all going to lose their meaning, but most of all, its gonna just portray you as "the nice guy who sucks up to his gf and puts her on a pedestal". You dont wanna be that guy.

Just because your friend did something one way and got a gf doesnt mean what hes doing is the right thing. Heck, I know a bunch of guys out there that have had some smokin hot girlfriends, are good looking themselves, and you would think theyre all naturals in the game and that you wud wanna take advice from them. Totally wrong. Some of those guys are COMPLETE and total AFC chumps, who are just walked all over on by their gf's, who are strapped to a leash like a b*tch by their gf's, and who shower their gf's with all the gifts and compliments you could imagine. But just because they have the girlfriend, and just because shes hot, doesnt mean what they're doing is the right thing.

Also, NEVER judge a girl based off what she says. Always judge her based off her actions. Yea sure, she may say that she really liked him and that the compliments made her feel good, heck any girl would say that about a guy who puts her on a pedestal and feeds her ego. But what she truly feels on the inside can be determined based off her actions.

 

[AlexLefty]

good advice from eagz
its always good to read random articles from him too because it's all just good

 

[buzzit]

good to know!
thanks for the advice!

but something bad happend yesterday and im not really pleased with my self about it...

so i saw her again
and now my best friend was there aswell
and well hes's really funny and know when to make jokes
and he made her laugh alot of the time and it accually made me really jealous..
but was trying not to be you know..
i know i still got some feelings for her.. and im really trying to get rid of them since they dont have any use anymore anyways..
but i know my friend
i maybe am a bit improved (but need to learn and try alot!) he's like i was before i knew this site so i know the 2 of them wont work.

anyways there another thing im asking my self
does a real DJ fall in love with girls they like? do they have feelings for the girl(s) he like? or does this works diffrently? cuz i then maybe have a problem
since i fall in love rather quick accually
But i think thats because i was so desperate

 

[needstochange]

"You'll fall in love, it's human nature. We all do it. But once a girl breaks your heart (and one will), just know that they're all capable of doing that and most likely will."

You really have to guard your heart and learn that it's not good to be a "sucker for love".

And remember, these girls are trying to win YOU, not the other way around. Always keep in mind that you're the prize.

 

[eaglez1177]

Geez im tired off ppl throwin around "love" like its nothin lol

good to know!
thanks for the advice!

but something bad happend yesterday and im not really pleased with my self about it...

so i saw her again
and now my best friend was there aswell
and well hes's really funny and know when to make jokes
and he made her laugh alot of the time and it accually made me really jealous..
but was trying not to be you know..
i know i still got some feelings for her.. and im really trying to get rid of them since they dont have any use anymore anyways..
but i know my friend
i maybe am a bit improved (but need to learn and try alot!) he's like i was before i knew this site so i know the 2 of them wont work.all i gotta say for this is just move on. Simple as that. Try gettin with some other girls cuz it'll take ur mind off this one.

anyways there another thing im asking my self
does a real DJ fall in love with girls they like? do they have feelings for the girl(s) he like? or does this works diffrently? cuz i then maybe have a problem
since i fall in love rather quick accually
But i think thats because i was so desperateFirst off, your fvcking 18 years old. The last thing you should be talking about is love. You have no idea what true love actually is. And any person or girl in highschool that says they love someone doesnt really know what love is either. All theyre feeling is just attractions and the feelings of liking someone, not true love. Imo, true love is being able to say "I want to spend the rest of my life with this person, and if it ever came down to a life or death situation, I would die to save their life". Thats my view of love.

As for the DJ thing, I would say that yea in some cases, the guy actually does have feelings for the girl and is genuinely attracted to her. In other cases though, he may not have any feelings toward her and may just be in it to get laid.

As for DJ's fallin in love with girls they like, thats kinda a tough question to answer lol. With what I said about love above, I would say that a DJ usually does not fall in love with the girls their attracted to. Its not often in life that you just "love" someone. True love, not fake love, comes by very rarely.

 

[alkaline hero]

WOW eaglez1177 Is right on target; he ju$t saved you a whole mess of a time and a better understanding of how to handle the next situation. & those were tears of realization
HEY eaglez1177 Mind Helping me on a situation that I've never found myself to be in?

 

[eaglez1177]

Haha yea sure wutup

EDIT: woops i didnt see ur thread ill just go to that one

 

[alkaline hero]

HEY eaglez117, Basically theres this hb that in my class usually by herself. What makes her more of a challenege is that she kind of likes my in-class buddy (im in a college class). So all they do is say there pathetic 'heys" to eachother and thats it plus this kids' got a girlfriend. I've tried talking her once when I saw her in a study room, pointed out how she stole her slippers from my grama', I got nervous for some lame reason, asked her what room this was, and I left" lame ass first impression but now she's a personal challenege for redemption. I was wondering if I should go as far as sitting with her in the next class and trying to vibe her out a second time. I think I posted the thread as crappy first impression or something like. Let me know if you need more info b/c I want to try making something happen with this girl BUT I do date other girls/talk to other girls. I dont sit there and obsess about her jsut maybe over analyze.
THANks ChamP hah

 

[buzzit]

hehe yeh you indeed helped me already quiet alot!

so today
i it was finally my day to go the gym again
so i was there with my friend
and i was just noticing the people arround me
and offcourse ther where a couple of pretty cute looking girls!

but i noticed something about my self
2 weeks ago i didnt even dear to look to them because of the girl i already liked but also because i was 'to shy'

but now
i could see them if i already knew them for some time!
im accually pretty sure im gonna talk to one shorty!

argh! al the confidence!

also the 23th of april im going to a discoparty!
i really cant wait!
the last time i did go to such party i had a AFClike charisma i accually went to the party FOR THE GIRLS wich is really bad! its about the fun you can have there! the girls are just a part of the fun! and i finally realise all this!



@needstochange

you said And remember, these girls are trying to win YOU, not the other way around. Always keep in mind that you're the prize.


and i really love this sentice
but i really think this is a hard one to learn
since you to show her that your interested but your still in the end the price
it kinda works against eachother i first thought!
but i will try to remember it as much as possible!